The way he summed everything up like he was relaying the plot of a bad movie proved just how detached he was from that life, from that young boy. He’d left that nightmare behind and he’d overcome all the ugly filth he’d endured.
“You’re not your parents, Zach.” Sophie wrapped her arms around herself and tipped her head back as she stepped closer. “We both have things to overcome. You can let your past define you or you can choose to take control of your life. If you’re so hell-bent on finding reasons to push me away, then go. Walk out that door, because you know what? Even with everything you just told me, and I believe you really condensed it, I still love you. Nothing has changed on my end. You’re still Zach, the man I’ve loved for years despite all the reasons I shouldn’t.”
Zach’s phone vibrated on the nightstand by her bed. Neither glanced that way, but she knew he was pulling away from this situation.
“Being with you was more than I thought I’d ever have.” His eyes held hers, but he didn’t reach for her like she’d hoped. “For a short time I let myself believe I could have a life with you, that loving you would be enough. But seeing you with your parents . . . I won’t be the one to come between you guys and I can’t love you in all the ways that you deserve. I would damn well try, but . . .”
The phone vibrated again and this time he went for it. When he answered, she could tell it was Liam on the other end. Sophie turned from the room and walked out. She couldn’t be in there. Couldn’t see him in her bedroom knowing he’d never be back.
She headed to her living room and stared out the wide front window. The sun was so bright and beautiful, totally opposite of all the hurt and darkness that had settled deep into her heart.
Zach’s heavy footsteps hit the hardwood, growing louder as he approached. From the corner of her eye, she saw him in the foyer, standing in the doorway to the living room. Silence settled between them. A new level of fear weighed heavy in her heart.
“I know you think you need to go,” she said without turning. “But know this. I gave you ten years. I waited for you to come around for so long that I’m exhausted. If you walk out that door, if you leave with the knowledge that we love each other and this ending is all on you, then don’t come back. You won’t be welcome in my life again, Zach.”
Her voice cracked. The words gutted her in ways losing her ability to have children never had, but she had to be honest. She couldn’t do this again . . . not when she’d come so close to having everything she’d ever wanted.
“I know.” His soft tone filled with angst sliced through her heart. “I’ll always love you, Soph. But there’s only so much I can give, and in the end, it wouldn’t be enough.”
Sophie whirled around. “You’re a coward.”
He stood still for only a moment before nodding and turning away. The front door opened and closed, leaving her broken and destroyed.
* * *
“How long will he be pissed?”
Zach spun around and slammed his wire cutters on the island. “I’m not pissed.”
Brock jerked as Liam settled a hand on the boy’s shoulder.
“Damn it.” Zach rested his palms on the old counter and dropped his head between his shoulders. “I’m frustrated, okay. That’s all. It’ll pass.”
Yeah, and he was going straight to hell for lying. He was pissed, beyond pissed, actually. He was a raging ball of pain, fury, and rage all rolled into one, and he only had himself to blame for getting caught up in some damn fairy tale, thinking he and Sophie could actually have something normal. They weren’t normal people.
“This have anything to do with Sophie?” Liam asked.
Didn’t everything? Years ago he’d started weaving his life around her and now he was so damn caught up, he had no clue how the hell to break free. He’d walked out of her house yesterday—the hardest thing he’d ever done in his life. She’d issued the ultimatum, and he’d had no choice but to call her on it and leave.
He’d been in a mood since, except for when Braxton’s lawyer called to say a judge would hear an emergency case for Brock on Monday. But he couldn’t sit home today. He couldn’t be at his house and not see Sophie in the kitchen, Sophie petting the puppies, Sophie in his bed.
“This wiring is done.” Zach pushed off the island and turned toward the wall in question. “We can start on these walls today if you guys are up for it.”
“You’re avoiding the subject,” Liam stated. “What the hell happened with Sophie? She hasn’t been by at all yesterday or today.”
The dead-last thing he wanted to talk about was this situation with Sophie. Liam and Braxton would give him hell . . . a place he deserved. Zach turned back to his brother, knowing he couldn’t keep this truth hidden.
“I doubt she’ll be coming by, at least for a while.” If at all. Maybe when Zach wasn’t there, but that would be very infrequently.
Brock’s wide eyes darted between Zach and Liam. “Don’t start fighting.”
Liam shook his head. “We won’t. But I want to know what you did.”
“We’re not seeing each other anymore.” Damn, that killed him to say, but it would get easier as time went on . . . wouldn’t it? “I’m not sure she’ll want to be here with me.”
Liam muttered a curse and smacked his hand against the countertop. “Are you for real? What the hell happened? That woman has been in love with you for years, and now you’re not seeing each other? I want to kick your ass, but I can already see you’re miserable.”
Well, that was something. “Drop it, Liam. I don’t want to talk about it.”
Zach’s cell vibrated in his pocket. At one time he would have jumped to answer, hoping it was Sophie. Now he only answered hoping it was work-related, because he wanted to completely submerge himself in projects and not think of anything else.
Pulling his phone from his pocket, he saw Macy’s name and relaxed.
“Hey, Macy,” he answered, ignoring Liam’s narrowed gaze. Whatever was going on there was none of his concern. Zach had his own issues. “What’s up?”
“Is this a bad time?”
Was there ever a good time anymore? “No, this is fine. Did you get a chance to see the ideas I e-mailed you?”
“I did. I actually wanted to discuss when you could get started. I know you’re busy at Sunset Lake, but if we could just discuss a realistic date.”
Zach stepped from the kitchen, away from Brock and Liam to head into the foyer. “Honestly, this project will take several months, but I can start sooner. It may just be slow moving at first, if that works for you.”
“Oh, Zach, really?” Macy’s tone hit that excited-woman octave. At least he could make someone happy. “I don’t want to pressure you. I know we’re friends, so I’m fine waiting, but if you can start sooner, that would be amazing.”
“I’ll start working on the final designs before we stake off the land.”
“Just tell me what I need to do and I’ll do it.” He could hear the smile in her voice. “Thank you so much, Zach. You’re the best.”
That was rather debatable. “I’ll be in touch.”
When he disconnected and turned, Liam was glaring at him. “Get the hell out of my private conversations. I’m building her a damn house. Chill.”
“Whatever you have going on or not going on with Sophie, fix it.” Liam turned to glance over his shoulder before lowering his tone. “I promised that kid we wouldn’t throw punches and I intend to keep that promise, but Sophie is special. You need to apologize for whatever you did. She’s our friend, she was Chelsea’s friend, and she’s going to be a major part of this project if you haven’t scared her away.”
Zach shoved his phone in his pocket and crossed his arms. “For now, it’s best if I don’t talk to Sophie. You’re more than welcome to call her, or Braxton can, but she won’t talk to me.”
Liam raised his brows. “Are you sure about that?”
“When I left, she told me I was never getting back into her life again.” Zach’s
throat tightened, and his chest felt as if it was being squeezed by a vise. “I’m pretty sure she won’t talk to me if I call her.”
Liam raked both hands over his face, one fingertip lingering a second longer over his scar. “You’ve hurt her. How did you hurt her this bad that she won’t even talk to you?”
“Reality hit me and I broke things off. I can’t be with her, Liam. I just . . . damn it, she can’t have children because of the accident.”
He hadn’t meant to blurt that out, but now that the words hovered between them, he couldn’t take them back. It wasn’t his place to share Sophie’s private information.
“Are you serious?” Liam asked. “And you won’t be with her because she can’t have kids? What the hell, man?”
Shoes scuffed against the hardwood as Brock slowly came into the open area. Zach wasn’t holding back; he had nothing else to hide at this point. He’d lost all that mattered and he had to remember what it was like living without her.
“That’s not the reason I’m not with her,” Zach clarified. “Discovering the truth, knowing all this time she’s had to change the focus of her life because of me, kills me. I can’t give her anything, Liam. I can’t be the man she needs or deserves.”
“That’s ridiculous.” Liam threw his arms out and laughed. “So, what . . . you’re deciding now what’s best for her? Did you even ask what she wants?”
Zach moved over to the staircase and sank onto the bottom step. He didn’t have the energy to fight with Liam, with Sophie . . . with himself.
“Can I talk to him for a minute?”
Zach glanced at Brock, who was staring at Liam, waiting for permission. Liam let out a sigh and nodded. “Sure. I have to head back to Savannah tonight, so I’m going to go get some work done in the kitchen. Braxton texted me a minute ago, and he’ll be here soon.”
Once Liam was gone, Brock came over and sat next to Zach. The old worn jeans and sneakers Zach first found him in were still a staple in his wardrobe, even though Braxton had rushed out and bought him a pair of jeans and a new pair of shoes. At least Brock did have on a different T-shirt, compliments of Braxton’s shopping trip.
“I barely know any of you, but I can’t help but form an opinion.” Brock rested his elbows on his knees and stared down at the scarred wood floor. “This accident that you caused, it left Liam and Sophie dealing with their own shit.”
“Watch your mouth.” Yeah, this kid was like looking into Zach’s own past. “Yes, though.”
“And Liam loves you. He seems to have forgiven you,” Brock went on. “I figure Sophie loves you or she wouldn’t have gone to all the trouble with breakfast the other day. Plus she looked at you like you really mattered.”
Yes, she did. He’d seen that look and now he’d have to keep that memory locked away, only pulling it out when he was truly desperate.
“I want that,” Brock stated. He glanced over at Zach. The bruises were faded now, but the yellowish tinge was still evident. “I want to find a woman one day who will look at me like I matter. Regardless of the sh—stuff I’ve been through, I hope I find someone who will still love me no matter what. And I don’t mean in that weird I-need-a-mommy way. I mean a woman I want to spend my life with.”
Zach hadn’t heard Brock speak this much since they met. Granted, that had only been a few days ago, but still. The sincerity in the boy’s tone, the hope that filled his eyes when he spoke of his future, warmed something in Zach.
“You want a family?” Zach asked.
Brock nodded, turning his focus to the threadbare knees on his jeans, where he started picking at a thread. “I know it sounds crazy since I’m so young, but I want a wife and kids. I just want normal. I’ve never had it and that’s all I want.”
“I hope you’ll want an education and a job,” Zach stated, nudging Brock with his shoulder. “Let’s try to keep an order to your goals.”
Brock smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I hear you. I’m just . . . I’m confused as to why you let Sophie go. I mean, you love her, right?”
Zach couldn’t speak for the lump in his throat so he nodded.
“Then why do you think you can’t give her what she needs? I figure if she loves you, then that’s all she needs. Right? I know your childhood wasn’t much different than mine, but I’m not giving up on finding happiness. I don’t think you should either.”
Zach listened to each word of advice given by a kid half his age and wondered how the hell this boy who’d come into his life only days ago could put Zach’s entire messed-up, warped life into perspective so easily.
“I don’t want you giving up.” Zach blew out a breath and came to his feet. “As for me, it’s too late.”
Brock pushed up and cracked his knuckles. “It’s only too late if you’re quitting. I thought you’d be one of the guys who fought for what he wanted.”
Before Zach could reply, Brock walked away. How the hell did that kid add another layer of guilt? Zach wasn’t giving up, he was moving on and setting Sophie free. She was going to be much happier in the long run.
And not fight for what he wanted? He was rebuilding a house for a damn resort and had had to fight to get this ball rolling, hadn’t he? Granted, this was Chelsea’s dream, but still, Zach wasn’t about to give up on this house and he sure as hell wasn’t going to give up on Brock. That boy was looking for someone to let him down, and Zach refused to be that person.
The back door opened and slammed. Braxton’s angry voice sounded through the hall leading to the foyer. Zach heard the name Sophie and knew he was in for it.
Just as Zach headed for the kitchen, he heard Liam call out, “We promised Brock no punching.”
Braxton gripped a folder in his hand as he came down the hall. He closed the gap between them and smacked the folder against Zach’s chest. “These are from Sophie. They’re some images you’d asked her to do. She said she’d try to get the others, but she’s not sure when she can do them. You want to know why she’s not sure?”
Not really, because Zach didn’t want to relive this entire nightmare with Braxton right now. Apparently he’d been to Sophie’s house and it took all of Zach’s self-control not to ask how she was doing . . . which would’ve been an absolutely stupid question.
“She’s thinking of moving.” Braxton shoved Zach back a step. “And as she’s rambling on about relocating and how she’d start her business over in another city, she’s trying her hardest not to cry, though her eyes are swollen and red, which leads me to believe you’re an asshole and you hurt her yet again.”
Moving? What the hell? Where had that come from? She loved it here in Haven and she had a reputable real estate agency. How could she think of leaving?
Life continued to smack him in the face. Every time he thought he was doing the right thing for those he loved, the plan absolutely blew up in his face, leaving him even more scarred than before.
Zach gripped the folder and opened it slowly: flawless drawings by Sophie, images of her late best friend’s dream. Even through all of this, Sophie wasn’t giving up on Chelsea, not giving up on this project, even though she’d let him go.
He glanced through each one and wondered how much time each picture had taken her, what she’d been thinking as she drew. She’d told him she had started drawing when she was recovering from the accident. Had she drawn any of these after he left yesterday morning?
How narcissistic did that make him, wondering if she’d drawn to get over him? Sophie would move on, she’d be fine eventually, and Zach would be . . . in the same hell he’d been in before he’d had her. No, actually he’d be in a deeper level because now that he’d been with her, tasted her, touched her, he knew exactly how amazing they were together and he’d have to live with those memories for the rest of his life.
“If we didn’t have to be in court tomorrow for Brock, I’d kick your ass.”
Zach glanced from the sketches up to his angry brother. “Liam already promised Brock no more punching.”
“I�
��d find another way to hurt you,” Braxton vowed, crossing his arms over his chest.
Even with his professor glasses on, Braxton was still a badass who rarely showed his anger. Apparently he saved it for Zach.
“We have work to do here,” Zach stated, closing the folder. “If you want to bitch at me, do it while putting up new Sheetrock in the kitchen.”
Braxton narrowed his dark eyes. “Are you seriously going to stay here and work, knowing Sophie is home crying? Are you that heartless?”
Zach shoved his brother aside. “I’m not heartless. I can’t be with her. Drop it.”
Zach headed into the kitchen. Liam was taking a drink, Brock was trying not to look at anyone, and Zach focused on the wall that needed new Sheetrock. Holes for three outlets and one light switch would need to be cut.
“You’re such an asshole.” Braxton pushed Zach from behind. “You left Sophie when things got complicated because you’re afraid.”
Zach whirled around, slapped the folder onto the island, and clenched his fists.
“Easy there,” Liam demanded. “No fighting.”
“Since when are you the mediator?” Zach called over his shoulder. “You guys don’t get it. You have no idea—”
“I know her parents came by and you freaked out,” Braxton interrupted. “Sophie told me everything, which only makes you more of a prick.”
Zach sighed. “You know what? You all can work. I’m taking a break.”
“Better cool down if you’re going to see Sophie,” Liam stated.
Zach flipped him a finger before storming out the back door. Damn his family for being so . . . concerned. He didn’t want concern, he wanted . . .
At this point Zach didn’t know what he wanted. If anything was possible in the do-over category, he’d take the night of the accident. Hindsight always proved what a selfish idiot he’d been.
He got in his truck and headed home to let the dogs out, feed them, play with them. Spending a few minutes around something that actually enjoyed his company was what he needed, because he was trying like hell not to go to Sophie’s house and beg her not to shut him completely out. But that wasn’t fair to either of them. She needed to move on, though the idea killed him, but in the long run she’d be okay and she’d find love with a man who would . . .
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