Joe patted him on the stomach. “Thought you might wanna go for a run with me. Do something about that gut you’re getting.”
Hugh gave his brother a playful shove, and Joe chuckled. Nope. She had to disagree. He definitely didn’t have a gut. He was all hard, ripped muscle. And lots of it.
“I’ll pass,” Hugh said, planting his hands on his hips.
“Fine. Let the middle-age spread grow.” Joe headed for the kitchen. “I’m gonna grab a bottle of water.”
“Sure. Help yourself. Take the whole damn fridge while you’re at it.”
Okay. Enough skulking up here. Shay took the first two steps. Hugh, obviously sensing her movement, looked up at her, and when he saw her coming down the stairs, he shook his head and tilted it in the direction she’d come. Silently telling her to get back up.
She quickly reversed a step—and stumbled, tripping over her own feet and falling ungraciously onto her butt. Thank God Joe was singing, or rather wailing some song with lots of curse words from the kitchen and didn’t hear her crashing around. She made it back to the room without being seen, but she’d bumped her elbow, and it hurt like hell.
An uneasy feeling settled in her belly and stayed there. It tightened and twisted until it physically hurt—a heck of a lot more than her arm. Was he embarrassed of her? Was that why he had her hiding in his bedroom? Yes, she understood what they were doing was casual, but still… His brother didn’t look like the kind of guy who’d worry about such things. Why would Hugh?
She bit her lip. But then last night…this morning, what they’d done. It had felt like more. It felt like…
She threw up a wall, blocking those thoughts before they could fully form. She didn’t mean anything to him. She didn’t want to. They had off-the-charts sexual chemistry. That’s all it was between them. That’s all she wanted from him.
She told herself that as she shoved her things back into her bag, as pain and anger welled up inside her. She thought Hugh was different. That he didn’t care what others thought. He and Travis were like day and night. Chalk and cheese. That’s what she’d believed, anyway. Perhaps not so much.
With nothing else to do, she sat on the end of his bed and waited, her humiliation increasing with every passing minute she was forced to hide up there.
A little while later, she heard the front door shut and Hugh climbing the stairs. She stood when he pushed open the door.
“Sorry about that. Joe thinks he can come and go as he pleases. This was our family home. He sometimes forgets it’s mine now.” His gaze moved over her, to the bag in her hand. “What’s going on? You leaving?”
“I need to get to work.” She was proud of herself when her voice came out strong.
He stared at her. “It’s seven thirty in the morning.”
She shrugged. “I have stocktaking to do for Jane today. I want an early start.”
He planted his hands on his hips, frowned. “You’re pissed?”
“No. Not at all. I just need to get going.”
He frowned. “It’s just easier… Joe not knowing about us…”
“Of course. There’s no reason for him to know.” Though there was no reason to keep it a secret, either. Unless he was ashamed to be seen with her.
“Stay for a bit longer. I’ll make you breakfast.”
She shook her head. “No, I really need to go.” Breakfast wasn’t included in their deal. This was an affair. Sex. She’d do well to remember that. She lifted her bag to sling over her shoulder and winced.
“You’re hurt?”
She tried to move past him, but his hand snaked out and wrapped around her upper arm, tugging her closer. “What happened to your arm?”
She stood straighter. “I bumped my elbow hurrying to get back up the stairs.”
“Let me see.” He took her arm in his large, warm hand, gently rubbing it. “Okay?”
It felt nice. Too nice. She didn’t want his sympathy right then. “Yes.”
Her voice sounded sharper than she’d intended. She tried to pull away, but he wouldn’t let her go and tugged her closer.
“What are you…?”
He bent down, and the next thing she knew, his mouth was on hers, kissing her hard. He cupped the side of her face with one hand, the other sliding around the side of her neck, and he deepened the kiss, refusing to let her retreat. Before long, she was kissing him back just as enthusiastically. By the time he gave her a gentle squeeze and pulled back, she was tingling all over.
She blinked up at him, feeling dazed and highly aroused. “What was that?”
“I’m sorry you hurt your arm, princess.” He ran his nose along hers. “And that was the kiss I wanted to give you before we were interrupted.”
“Oh.” She swallowed. “It was very…nice.”
His eyes narrowed. “Nice?”
She nodded. “Mmm-hmm.”
He made a rough sound and backed her up against the wall. “I think I can do better than nice.”
“You could try,” she said against his lips, then gave a start when her phone started ringing.
Hugh let out a frustrated breath. “Ignore it.”
“I can’t. It could be my mom or Edna.” And if it was her mother, and she was up this early, the chances were high she hadn’t made it to bed in the first place, or at least her own bed, which could mean all kinds of bad things. “I have to get it.”
She stepped away from him and quickly rummaged around in her bag. “Mom promised to let Rocky out this morning. If she’s let me down…” She trailed off. “God knows why I believed her in the first place.”
She put the phone to her ear without checking. “Hello.”
“Good morning, Shay.”
She froze, the familiar voice raising her hackles in an instant. “What do you want, Travis?”
She saw Hugh stand up straighter, move closer, but was too pissed that Travis was bugging her again to pay much attention.
“Honey, please, hear me out.”
“I’m not your honey. And I’ve already heard what you have to say.”
“Jesus.” He huffed out a breath. “At least tell me you’ve thought about it, about us.”
“I can honestly say I haven't thought about you at all. I’ve been too busy working three jobs to give you a second thought.”
He was quiet for several long seconds, then, “You chose to leave. You didn’t have to.”
“You humiliated me, you broke…” She stopped herself. He didn’t deserve any more of her time and energy. “I have to go.”
“I messed up, Shay. I know that. Come back to me, please. Meet me somewhere for lunch?”
Gah! Had he lost his mind? “That’s not a good idea. Look, I have to go.” Then she disconnected.
She was so damn weak. One kiss from Hugh and she’d forgotten all about what happened when Joe showed up. How Hugh kept her hidden, kept her his dirty little secret, just like Travis had done. But at least Hugh was honest about it. He hadn’t made her believe they had a future or that he wanted more from her than sex.
But she’d thought he at least liked her, respected her.
God, she was so confused.
If she’d harbored a shred of hope that her and Hugh might mean more to each other one day—it was certainly gone now.
She grabbed her bag. “I have to go.”
Chapter Fourteen
Hugh watched Shay shove her phone back in her bag as something swirled inside him like a goddamn hurricane. Rage and—jealousy. The emotions mixed together, making his voice sound rough as hell.
“What the fuck did he want?”
She was walking toward the door but stopped in her tracks at his tone.
“The same thing he wanted the other night.”
His knuckles cracked when he squeezed his hand into a fist. “He’s still trying to get you back?”
She hitched her bag higher, fingers gripping the strap. “Yes.” She turned away, stared out the window, slender throat working. “All of a sudde
n, he can’t live without me.”
Hugh’s heart started to pound. Shit, he wanted to kill the asshole with his bare hands. “That what you want?”
She shook her head, looked back at him. “I used to. I used to want the white picket fence, the kids, all of that stuff. For a while there, I thought I might have that…with Travis. But no. To answer your question, I don’t want to get back with him. I don’t want those things anymore. Not with Travis.” Her gaze darted away again. “Not with anyone.”
Her words felt like a kick in the guts. Which was messed up. He’d never thought about kids, about something permanent—not until this minute. Not until Shay. To hear that she didn’t want that, it kind of stung in a way he struggled to process. “So you don’t want to settle down someday, raise a family?” Shut the hell up. Why was he pushing this?
She crossed her arms over her stomach. “That’s not for me.” She smiled, but it looked forced. “I guess there’s no need to ask you the same question.” She lifted her hands and waved them around. “This will make a great family home one day.”
He took a step toward her, words he had no damn right to say on the tip of his tongue. “Shay…I…”
“I like my life the way it is.” Her green gaze dropped to his chest, stayed there. “I like my trailer. I love that if I get a wild hair one day and decide to move, I can just hitch it up and take my home with me. I like my freedom too much now to tie myself down.”
Hugh took her in, her posture, her body language. She was uncomfortable as hell.
And because she sucked at it, he knew the woman was lying through her teeth.
She was also scared shitless of letting anyone in. His girl had been hurt and not just by that asshole who used her and treated her like shit. And he got that. He understood that fear. Only his came in the form of feeling like a failure, from letting down his whole family.
Because he’d been so damn blind they were in danger. The only difference between him and Shay? He was what he believed himself to be. Shay had done nothing but be the open, sweet, beautiful woman she was, and for her troubles, the people she trusted, cared about most, had stomped all over her.
Travis had lost her, and it had taken that loss to finally make him see what he’d thrown away. The guy had screwed up in a big way. In a way he could never repair, could never take back. He’d lost his chance with her. If Hugh was a different man, a better man, and Shay had given that to him, what others had abused… Fuck, he would have protected it with his life.
But he wasn’t a different man.
Jesus. He wanted to punch something.
She cleared her throat. “Well, I better go.”
He stepped back because as much as he wanted to keep her there, he couldn’t. If nothing else, it was too damn dangerous. She brushed past, out into the hall, and he followed her down the stairs to the front door. He wanted to take her hand and drag her back up to his bed, keep her there all day.
She walked into his living room, and his gut tightened. He liked seeing her there. In his space. Moving around his house. Shit.
Scooping up her keys from the coffee table, she held them up. “Can’t go without these.”
She walked to the door, and they stood there, staring at each other. The woman had a great mouth. A mouth he wanted to spend days kissing. Wanted to see stretched around his cock again. He cupped her jaw, pressed his thumb to her full lower lip, slid it across the plump flesh, couldn’t stop himself.
“Can I see you tonight?”
“I’ll need to check with Harold, make sure Edna’s covered.”
“So that’s a maybe?” He wanted to demand she come over. Tell her he wanted her in his bed every night. That he was getting used to sleeping beside her. Jesus. He couldn’t think like that.
“It’s a maybe,” she said in that husky way he was starting to like a whole hell of a lot.
“I have to work late.” They had two more cars to get for this next shipment. Cars they had to find tonight. “I’ll text you when I’m home. Could be late, though.”
“Okay.” She still wouldn’t look at him, gaze darting around the room.
“We good, Shay?”
“Of course.”
He slid his fingers into the hair at her temple but kept his other hand at his side. If he touched her, felt the warmth of her skin through her clothes, the softness of her body now, he would drag her back upstairs. “Look at me, princess.”
She did, but something wasn’t right. He just didn’t know what.
“We good, Shay?” he repeated.
“Yes,” she whispered.
He held her gaze, hoping she’d say more, reveal more, but she gave him nothing. He needed to know they were okay, that this wasn’t ending between them, not yet. So he leaned in, going after a response from her the only way he could, the only way he had a right to ask for one. He touched his lips to hers.
She was still for a heartbeat, then her little tongue darted out to taste him. Giving it to him. He groaned against her lips. It was a struggle, but he kept the kiss slow and sweet, ignored the demanding throb of his cock.
He smoothed his fingers over her hair then lifted his head, dropping his hand away. “Car’s in the garage. I put it there last night.”
She blinked, the dreamy look in her eyes vanishing in an instant. “Pardon?”
“Your car. I put in the garage to get it off the road.”
Her hands slid from his shoulders to his chest, and she gently pushed him back. “Oh, right. Of course.”
What’s going on in that head of yours, princess? He tried to tug her back, but she opened the door and pulled away. He fucking hated it. Hated that he didn’t have the right to make her tell him what just extinguished the light in those gorgeous green eyes, that he didn’t have the right to fix it, to make anything that darkened her world go away.
Yeah, like he could fix her life. He couldn’t even fix his own.
He followed her to the garage and opened it for her, watched her open the driver’s door of the Honda and throw in her bag.
She turned to him. “Maybe I’ll see you later.” She was back to not meeting his stare.
She wasn’t coming. He’d fucked up. Somehow, he’d fucked up everything. But before he could open his mouth, before he could stop her, she climbed in and started the engine.
Shit. Maybe this was for the best. He should let her end it. It was the smartest thing to do. He shoved his hands into his pockets to stop from yanking open the passenger side door and demanding she tell him what the hell had just happened.
Instead, he watched her back out.
His phone started ringing in his pocket, and he pulled it out. Hit the call button. “Yeah.”
Shay lifted her hand, gave him a small wave then drove away. His stomach clenched.
“Found the Toyota we need.”
At least Joe had his priorities straight. “Can we get it tonight?”
“Yeah, parking attendant I know told me this guy is at the Cross Street parking lot every Tuesday night. Eight ‘til late. It’s ours.”
“Good work.” They had a couple guys they paid for information. Sometimes, they came through.
Joe disconnected, and Hugh went back inside. Into his empty house.
He looked around. He’d decorated the downstairs but then stopped. Not seeing the point, not with his future so unclear. Hell, he could wind up in prison if things went badly, or worse, if Al didn’t get his way.
The scary thing was, for the first time in a long time, Hugh wanted to finish what he started.
Wanted to make this place a home.
Another reason to stay the hell away from Shay Freestone.
* * *
Shay pulled up outside her trailer a short time later and sucked in an unsteady breath when she saw her mother sitting on the top step. She’d lied to Hugh; she didn’t have stocktaking to do for Jane. Shay wasn’t due to start work for a couple hours. She’d just needed to get away. Before she caved, before she let him kiss her
until she forgot all the reasons why they needed to end what they were doing. Closing her eyes, she took in a steadying breath, fighting back the unhappy grip in her belly, and reached for the door.
Her mother stared at her, eyes hard as she climbed out.
“Hey, Mom. Have you eaten? I thought I’d make us breakfast.”
She took a drag on the smoke she was holding then stubbed it out on the side of the trailer. “Nice of you to show up. I came out here to see you, and you’re never here.”
Guilt rippled through her. Her mother was right. Shay had done everything to avoid spending time with her. Nothing good ever came from it. Maybe this time would be different? She almost laughed out loud at the ridiculous, almost desperate thought. “Well, I’m all yours tonight. What do you want to do?” Staying away from Hugh was for the best. She couldn’t put herself through that again, what happened earlier. The way he’d kept her hidden away as if…as if he was embarrassed to be seen with her.
Her mother’s lips lifted into a smirk. “Moved on to someone else already, has he?”
Pain curled in Shay’s belly. She tried to move past and go inside, but her mother grabbed her arm, long nails digging into her skin.
“I thought I taught you not to aim too high. You’re not in that man’s league. It was bound to happen. Just be thankful it’s now and not when you’re attached.”
That hurt. A lot. Her mother’s low opinion of her shouldn’t matter, but it did. Every time her Mom spewed her poison, it opened a fresh wound. Shay didn’t bother correcting her mother and pulled her arm free. “Do you want breakfast or not?”
Her mother’s eyes narrowed, grip loosening. “What are you going to do with the car?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I say sell it.” She lit another cigarette and took a long drag. “He screwed you over. Screw him back. Sell it.” She glanced away then back at Shay. “Maybe then you’ll have something to spare for your mother.”
That tiny shred of hope, the one that always snuck in when her mother showed up, shriveled and died. Really, she was surprised it took this long for her to ask for money. Still, even now, after all these years of disappointment, it was another hit, another blow. “I’m not selling Hugh’s car. I’m giving it back.”
Swerve: Boosted Hearts (Volume 1) Page 14