I gulped.
“This is all just a big mistake…,” I started, but he cut me off.
“You're right,” he said. “It's a mistake that I've been assigned to clean up, and I plan on doing exactly that. I take my command very seriously. Now, if you will please take Xander-the-Traitor and his little friend to the depot, we can get to work rolling up our sleeves and restoring order around here.”
The soldiers immediately began marching us forward.
“I want to be notified the minute the train has pulled out of the station,” he shouted after us. “Unlike the previous unit in charge, we run a tight outfit. I think all of the citizens will breathe a sigh of relief knowing that the whole ordeal is over with, and order has been restored. When they learn how close they came to being handed over to wild bikers and cannibal scum, they'll fall to their knees and praise me. Whipping things into shape after that should be a piece of cake.”
“You're going to regret this,” I shouted over my shoulder as they shoved me forward.
“Goodbye, Xander,” Batista shouted pleasantly. “Tell Hueneme that Freedom Town is in good hands at last.”
I fumed with anger as I walked on. I barely noticed the pain in the muscles of my arms and legs, biting with each step. My weariness from the exhausting night I'd had dissipated in the fresh heat of my rising anger.
The first thing I'm going to do when they clear this up is come back and knock that arrogant jerk right on his butt, I thought.
I turned my head to look at Sonya, but she didn't look back.
An assassin? An outlaw? How had she known where I was? What had she been planning to do with me? A million terrible thoughts raced through my mind. I felt totally betrayed and alone.
I gazed off to my left as we passed the walls of Freedom Town. The faces of the people I'd come to know stared back at me with little or no emotion. They looked like they’d lost all hope. I saw Stanley the Stone among them. A look of righteous anger was fixed on his face, but his eyes leaked a steady stream of tears.
He's lost everything now, I thought, remembering how in less than a day both his daughters had been taken away from him. I don't blame him for hating me. It's not my fault, but he doesn't know that. His anger may be all he has left now.
His eyes caught mine and seemed to burn brighter with pure hatred. Raw waves of guilt washed over me, making my breath catch in my throat. I wished I could go to him and tell him my side, wished I could beg him for forgiveness, but it was too late now. I looked down at my feet as we shuffled past. I could feel his stare burning a hole in the back of my head, long after we'd moved on.
My time will come, I thought, defiance kicking back in. I'll have my chance to tell my side of things, and then I'll come back and tell them all the truth.
I just hoped by then that it wouldn't be too little too late.
The sun was just starting to rise when they led me off in manacles to the side of a boxcar, separating me at last from Sonya. She was taken to her own car with no less than four armed guards. They weren't taking any chances of her escaping again. She looked up at me with an icy cold glare that sent shivers down my spine.
Can things get any worse?
Two soldiers lifted me up and put me in the train car. Inside, an armed guard stood watch over another shackled prisoner – Felicity Jane.
“What is my wife doing here?” I demanded. My arresting officer nodded to the guard who turned and punched me hard in the stomach. I doubled over in pain, falling to the straw covered floor of the train car and coughing up spit. Normally I wouldn't have been so sensitive, but between the blows to the head I'd received just hours before, and all the electric shocks, my body was feeling worn thin.
I rolled toward Felicity, taking in the look of betrayal and sadness in her eyes.
“You two behave now,” one of the soldiers said with a cruel laugh, signaling our guard again. He nodded back and closed the door. It was pitch dark for a moment, and then my eyes adjusted to the light streaming in through the wooden slits.
I heard the sound of the engine whistling as we began to move right away. I turned back to see Felicity staring at me, waiting for me to speak. I looked down at the floor once more, uncertain of where to start.
It's all my fault, I thought. If I hadn't lost my temper, we might not be in this situation. If things had just been different.
But they weren't. Moto used to say there is no point in thinking about the past, dredging up old memories and using them to feel sorry for yourself. All you could do, he said, was learn from your mistakes and promise not to do the same thing again.
I wasn't certain what I could learn from the last twenty-four hours just yet. After all so much had happened, and most of it had been completely out of my control. But when it came to Felicity and the way things had gone, I was positive I was at fault. If it hadn't been for me, she wouldn't be chained up in shame being led off to stand trial for things she knew nothing about. The guilt was like a spike stabbing right through me. I felt the weight of the world crashing down on me and I welcomed it, wishing it would take me to the bottom of the ocean, or anywhere really, so long as I didn't have to face that look on her face.
Can you blame her for hating you now?
I knew the answer before I even asked it. One thing was certain. It was going to be a long trip.
Chapter Nine
We rode in silence for a good while; the sound of the metal wheels clicking against the old rails, the jogging of the car, the heat, all lulling me to sleep. I fought the urge to pass out with everything in me. My thoughts tortured me, but I couldn't bring myself to speak first, not after everything that had happened. At last I heard the gentle snoring of our guard. I looked up to see his head tilted back. He was sitting with his back against the wall of the car, fast asleep. Felicity heard it too.
“Xander,” she said softly. I didn't answer. I couldn't. I was so miserable. I clenched my eyes tight, holding on to the feeling inside me of anger and hate and sadness.
“Xander,” she said again, louder this time to be sure I heard her. “What is happening?”
I shook my head.
“Xander, talk to me,” she said. “You owe me at least that much.”
“I don't know,” I said, giving in at last. I licked my dry lips as I stared at the floor. “That's the truth.”
“They are saying you are a traitor,” she said softly, “that you plotted with the enemy to hand over Freedom Town in exchange for some kind of reward. Is that true?”
“Does that sound true?” Incredulity shot through me at the words. I looked up and fixed a burning stare at her.
“No,” she said, shaking her head. She spoke to me like I was a child. “It doesn't, but you've been acting so strange lately. Tyler Finch said you were flirting with the girls at the train stop, the ones with the Brat Pack, before you lured them into an Alpha trap.”
“Tyler Finch has it all wrong,” I said with an angry chuckle. “I was trying to cut them a break. I caught him and Scott and their little friends spray painting the train yard and I decided to show them I could be cool, that I wasn't so unlike them. They were all drinking too. Did he mention that? Homemade corn liquor out of glass soda bottles.”
“No,” she said. “He conveniently forgot to mention that part.”
“I figured as much.”
“But why would he say you were part of it if you weren't? Why would he lie? I'm just trying to understand.”
“I don't have a clue,” I admitted. “I mean, I knew they didn't like me, but this is just too far-fetched to wrap my head around. Survivor’s guilt, maybe? I'm not sure. He took off and left us all there. He was the only one that got away.”
“So what really happened then?”
I shook my head again. I wasn't sure I was ready to tell the whole thing over again, but it looked like I didn't have much of a choice. Felicity obviously didn't believe everything they'd told her, but she also didn't sound like she trusted me.
“Wha
t's the difference?” I laughed. “Telling you won't change how things ended up. How long was it before they came for you after I was gone?”
“I was asleep when the commotion started,” Felicity recalled. “I'd been lying in bed tossing and turning, and finally drifted off when I heard the sirens. I came out wondering what was going on. The camp was in chaos. People were running around and yelling like we'd been invaded. I was really scared. I kept hoping I'd see you, but you weren't anywhere.”
I was in the back of a trailer knocked out cold, I thought.
“Go on,” I encouraged. She gave me a pensive look before continuing.
“Tyler was near the wall. He was pale as a sheet. Someone had wrapped a blanket around him. There was a circle of adults near him asking him questions. Gavin was there, but Stanley was pretty much the leader.”
Stanley the Stone, I thought. I'm surprised it wasn't Jamie Friendly.
“He kept asking Tyler what had happened, but Tyler was scared to talk,” Felicity explained. “So Stanley was kinda interpreting things, putting words in his mouth. He'd say, 'Is that how it happened?' and Tyler would nod. After a while a picture started to emerge, and it didn't look good.”
“Stanley blamed me for losing his daughters,” I offered.
“In a nutshell,” Felicity agreed. “The official version was that you had caught the Brat Packerz out past curfew, but instead of punishing them, you kept them there until the Alphas attacked. Tyler said you were making inappropriate comments to the girls, scaring them.”
She fixed her stare at me, as if she was waiting for me to deny it. I didn't waste a second.
“That's a lie,” I protested, feeling a lump rise in my throat. I thought about Janice's lips and the way she let her fingers glide over mine when I took her cigarette. She'd thought I was cute. There was something there, but so what? It was just harmless flirting, nothing more. It's not like I was going to take her to Lookout Mountain for a make out session or anything! And I sure as hell wasn't working with the enemy to lure kids into a trap! What had Tyler told her father about that moment? Was that part of why he blamed me? I drove the thought of her from my mind.
“Nothing like that ever happened. I swear!”
“Tyler said he looked up and saw zombies closing in on them,” she looked away to hide the pain in her eyes. “He said that Alphas came out of nowhere, that they spoke to you by name.”
“Another lie,” I insisted. She turned back to look at me again as she pushed on.
“He said he ran back to the wall thinking you were all behind him,” she expounded. “By the time he was under the Charlie hole, he heard the screaming. He climbed back to watch as the undead devoured his girlfriend, ripping her apart. He said by that point the rest of you were gone. He ran and got his dad. Within the hour there was a search party with armed soldiers searching the location, but there was no sign of Alphas or zombies, just the remains of the girl torn to shreds.”
“Penelope,” I recalled, remembering her cries as she slipped and went down.
“They sent word to the base at Edwards and less than an hour later the troops arrived,” Felicity replied. “They talked to Tyler and his dad, then Stanley, then Jamie.”
“Of course,” I said sarcastically. “I'm sure he had plenty to tell them.”
“He looked really scared when they came for him,” she said defensively. “I still don't know what your problem is with him.”
“I heard all about his little talk with them before I got shoved on this train,” I maintained. “He said more than enough to paint me as a psychopath who was out of control. He never mentioned his role in any of it either.”
“They questioned me next,” Felicity interjected, ignoring the subject of Jamie for a moment. “At first I didn't understand why they wanted to talk to me at all. I mean, I wasn't out there. What could I know?”
I knew where she was heading, and it made me sick.
“A man named Officer Batista came into our trailer,” she stated. “He told me to sit on the bed while his men searched the place from top to bottom. I don't know what they were looking for, but I don't think they found it. He kept asking me if I had ever mentioned meeting with any Alpha tribe leaders in the past.”
“Batista,” I hissed, spitting his name out like poison. “He couldn't wait to get rid of me. They put him in charge of Freedom Town, and now he's taking credit for all my hard work. Can you believe that?!”
I was furious just thinking about the way he had spoken to me.
“I told him that you would never betray the people at camp,” she confirmed. “I told him he was wrong, but then he started asking me how well I knew you, like he was going to convince me you were only pretending the whole time.”
“What else did he ask you?”
“He asked about Jamie,” she said after a pause, “about what happened between the two of you earlier in the day.”
“And what did you tell him?”
“Xander,” she said in a shaky voice, “I'm not sure I want to talk about this now.”
“Did you tell him that I caught you and your boyfriend hugging behind the school, or did you leave that part out?”
“My boyfriend? Are you still stuck on that? I told you there is nothing between us, that we are just friends. I don't understand why you are so obsessed with the idea of us dating. It's ridiculous.”
“Did you also tell him how you planned on leaving me for Jamie? You must not have done a good enough job convincing him, because you still ended up in here chained with me.”
“For your information, Jamie Friendly is gay,” Felicity shouted, anger blazing brightly in her indignant eyes.
“What did you just say?” I couldn't believe the words she'd just spoken. It was like being hit in the face with a bucket of cold water.
“You heard me, Alexander Macnamara,” she said, using my full name. “Jamie Friendly is gay. Oh my god! Is that what you thought was happening all this time? Is that why you were freaking out?”
“He can't be gay,” I protested.
“Why not?”
“Because he can't,” I cried out. “Okay? I would have known it. I would have seen it.”
I thought about all the times he'd hung around after I'd made announcements, about him never wearing a shirt and always smiling at me. It started to make sense.
Of course, I realized, feeling totally thick. He seemed off because he was flirting with me. He never had any intention of stealing my wife. How could I not see it? Jamie was so obviously gay!
“Well, I hate to break it to you,” Felicity said, her words dripping with sarcasm, “but it's true.”
“Wow,” I faltered, feeling like a complete idiot. “I see it now.”
“So you thought I was into Jamie?”
“Yeah, sorta,” I said sheepishly.
“That is so boneheaded of you,” she shot back. She sounded less angry, as if discovering that the true cause of my bizarre behavior had taken a lot of the wind out of her sails. “Why would you think that anyway?”
“I don't know,” I mumbled. “He's good-looking and famous, like you, plus you were always hanging around him and gossiping...”
“Like girls?” Felicity interrupted.
“Yeah,” I conceded.
What a moron I've been. All this time I've been acting like a crazy person, and for no good reason. I wouldn't be surprised if she hates me now.
“I just needed someone to talk to,” she admitted. “Jamie was safe for me. He was the only guy at that camp who didn't try to hit on me when you weren't around. It's not easy adjusting to my new life you know. I'm not used to having to work and be productive like a normal person. I'm used to sitting in my air conditioned trailer on set and sending my assistant out to fetch me Starbucks.”
I hadn't thought about what she was going through. I'd only focused on how I felt, what I was dealing with in running the camp, what was important to me. I had been a lousy husband. She'd found someone to talk to, a friend tha
t she could trust, and I'd picked a fight with him and beaten him up.
“I'm so sorry, Felicity,” I choked. “I didn't realize.”
“It explains a lot,” she said softly. “Xander, I would never leave you in a million years. I love you. Do you understand that?”
“Even though I'm not from your world?”
“Yes,” she yelled, hoping the rising volume would make the words sink into my throbbing head. “A million times more because you're not from Hollywood. You're not some fake jerk trying to screw me over to climb higher up the ladder of fame.”
“I've been so stupid,” I confessed. I was so tired all of a sudden, so worn through that I wanted to fall to the center of the earth and sleep forever. “I'm sorry, Felicity. I really am. You have no idea. I'm going to make it up to you. I swear. Please, just tell me what to do and I will do it.”
“Thank you for apologizing,” she said, the anger leaving her face. “It means a lot to me. You're not the only one who makes mistakes.”
“I'm not used to feeling like this,” I said, almost pleading. “I know it's not an excuse, but I've never loved anyone before, not anyone I wasn't directly related to anyway. I couldn't stand the thought of losing you to someone else. It was like a poison that clouded everything I saw.”
“Baby listen,” Felicity cooed. “If we are going to make it as a married couple, you're going to need to get past these jealousy issues and learn to trust me. I know it can be scary, but you're just going to have to be honest with me. We're both going to have to work harder, that's all.”
“I promise I will,” I offered.
“Good,” she said with a laugh. “Because it looks like we're going to need each other now more than ever. This is a pretty big mess we're in.”
“You can say that again,” I chuckled. More than anything, I wished I could give her a hug and wrap my arms around her. “Don't worry. When we get to Hueneme and I explain what really happened to Moto, we'll be cleared. Although I'm not sure I wanna return to Freedom Town any time soon, not after all that's happened.”
“What did happen?” Felicity bit her lip.
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