by Alice Shaw
“He went through a minor hiccup,” he said.
I felt my stomach drop to the floor. I collapsed into Riley’s body. “I’m going to be sick,” I said.
Everything in my field of vision was spinning. I couldn’t fathom never seeing my dad again. There was so much more that we needed to do and say now that we patched up our relationship.
My father grew up hard, but he did the best he could to raise me better. I remembered our first horse ride together. I remembered him taking me to the baseball field to practice my throw. All of those memories coalesced into something beautiful. All I wanted was one more day with him.
The color in my mom’s face completely disappeared. She had gone into shock. Riley and Andy ran to hold her steady. She quivered against their bodies.
At that point, I lashed out at the doctor. “What happened to my father?”
“He’s stable, but he had an interaction with the anesthesia. I don’t want to worry you too much because he’s been strong up until this point. His body has undergone a lot of trauma, but he’s in stable condition,” the doctor said.
Riley saw the fear in all our eyes, so he spoke up. “When will we know more?” Riley asked.
The doctor took a deep breath. “All we can do now is wait. These things can take hours or days. Every patient is different,” he said.
“Can we see him?” I asked.
The doctor shook his head. “I’m afraid that wouldn’t be a good idea. Any extra stress could put him into a state of shock,” he said.
“Please come back as soon as you know,” Riley said. The doctor said he would, but I had lost all hope.
None of us said a word, but the four of us threw our arms around my mother. We did the only thing we knew how to do. We comforted her by letting her know that we’d be there, no matter what.
“Thank you,” she whispered. “But you should go home. You’re probably so tired from driving.”
“Mom, we’re not leaving. We’re sleeping here tonight,” I protested.
“Holden, you’re pregnant. You need the rest,” she argued.
This time, my brother interjected. He took my mother’s hand and squeezed. “We’re all staying until we know what’s going on. We’re not going to let you down, mom.”
My mother nodded. She was stubborn at times, and I was sure she felt a natural responsibility to hold us all together. But now that we were grown up, our roles were changing. It was our turn to hold her up.
We stayed for two full days, waiting for an answer. The doctor would check on us, but each time, he gave the same response.
We were all pretty shaken up and a bit delirious too. When we were tired, we fell asleep against each other for a mere hour. Then, we’d wake up, try to keep ourselves busy, and fall back asleep. Rinse and repeat, until I lost track of the time completely.
Nearly a day later, the doctor came out to the lobby with glazed eyes. He ran his hands over his lids before telling us the news. I was sure this was the end.
Chapter Eighteen
Riley
I felt the alarm take over my body. Holden’s hand clenched against mine, and I could feel his knees start to buckle. I tried to support him in every way that I knew how, but this was so hard for all of them.
His family had gone through hell to fix things. All I wanted was for them to have a happy ending, but the doctor’s cues were painting a whole different story.
“How is he?” I asked.
Without pausing, the doctor answered us. “He fought tooth and nail in there. I’m not going to lie to you. This recovery process has been hard, and it’s going to take a hell of a lot longer for him to get back on his feet,” he said.
“But… he’s going to make it?” Holden asked.
The doctor wiped the last of his tears from his eyes and nodded. A huge smile formed on his face. Holden’s family, including myself, jumped into the air, screaming with the purest joy in the world.
“I’m sorry for coming out here with tears dripping down my face. Normally, I wait to give this type of announcement, but I know you’ve been waiting here for days now. I had to come running out here as soon as my team was sure,” the doctor said.
“Oh, doctor!” Holden’s mom came running to hug him. The doctor laughed and kissed her on the cheek. “Thank you so much. You saved his life today. We’ll never forget this.”
Because Holden’s father was recovering, we agreed to come back in a few days. We left in hopeful spirits, feeling the energy bring us even closer together.
Family dynamics were always a strange thing, but they had somehow overcome their self-imposed limitations. It was really a beautiful thing to see, and it gave me hope that one day my own family would reconnect again.
When we finally got back to the ranch, we were exhausted. Holden and I practically fell onto his bed, but we didn’t close our eyes just yet. I held my omega close and kissed the back of his neck.
“I’m proud of you,” I whispered.
“Me? I didn’t do anything, except cry,” he said. “If anything, I’m proud of you. You waited on us hand and foot.”
I shook my head and pulled the covers over our bodies. I scooted in closer to him. “I just remember when we first met. You hated your family, and maybe they gave you a lot of reasons to hate them. You all have managed to right your wrongs. You give me hope,” I said.
Holden turned around and placed his finger against my lips. I kissed the edge and smiled. He whispered, “I have so much faith in everything we do, Riley. We’re the most perfect team in the world.”
“Thank you,” I said. “I guess we better get to bed, huh? We’ve got a lot of planning to do for the Today Show.” The opportunity still didn’t seem real.
“Oh my god. Well, we still have some time to think about all of this, but maybe we should pick some recipes out,” Holden said, eyes wide open.
“Crazy, isn’t it? While we were waiting in the hospital, I was going over my notes. I’ve got one perfect dish ready.”
“You’re freakin’ superman,” he said.
I had a lot more planned too. Once Holden was fast asleep, I was going to go to the neighbor’s ranch. I was going to cut him a deal. One way or another, I was going to win Holden’s horse back.
I had no idea what this man was going to be like, so when I walked up to Jack Hornton’s ranch at nearly half past midnight, I knocked on the door timidly. I expected the worst. What I got was a whole different thing completely.
First, I heard music resonating from the hallway, fairly loudly, a country twang. Then, the door creaked open. “Yes?”
I could only see a sliver of the man’s eyes, and they were, without a doubt, curious. “Jack Hornton?”
Again, he answered steadily. “Yes.”
I cleared my throat anxiously and took a step back, wondering if this was a bad time. Although, he was clearly wide awake. “I’m staying over at the ranch next door. I’m Riley Chase. I wanted to speak to you about something important,” I said.
Jack Hornton carefully opened the door to get a better look at me. He was a skinny man, of about the age of fifty. He wore a pistol on his hip, and a cowboy hat hung low over his face. “This is about Sonny, ain’t it?”
I held up a bottle of Jameson I brought for this specific occasion. I didn’t know how to talk to an old rancher, but I figured this might help. “Care for a drink?” I asked.
Jack laughed, but it wasn’t exactly friendly. It came from a place of disillusionment. “Come in,” he muttered. “Spare the Jameson. I don’t drink.”
The inside of his home was nicely decorated with southwestern art. Hung throughout the hallway were the skulls of bulls, as well as some old rifles. The decor was somewhat comforting.
Jack led me to the kitchen, where the living room connected. He took a seat on his old leather couch, waving me over, but I couldn’t find the courage to take a seat. The record kept spinning, playing an album I had never heard before.
“You caught me off guard,”
he said as he lit a cigarette. “I don’t normally get knocks on my door at this hour.”
“I’m sorry, sir,” I said, instinctually.
“Don’t call me sir. And sit down. You’re making me nervous,” he said.
Once I took a seat, I felt a little bit more at ease. “I’ll just spit it out,” I said. “This is about more than Sonny. This is about Holden.”
“I’m assuming you’re a part of the family? A cousin or something?” he asked.
“Well, actually, I’m going to be the father of his child,” I croaked.
Jack Hornton didn’t bat an eye. He couldn’t be bothered to nod in acknowledgment. All he did was stare. So, I immediately continued my sales pitch.
“Look, I don’t mean to interrupt your time. I just came here because I know that Holden loves that horse. Sonny was a part of his childhood, and that horse was really the only thing that connected him to his family for a long time,” I said.
“And you want to bring him back… after I spent my hard earned cash to buy him,” he said.
I felt my throat tighten, so I reached for the bottle of Jameson. Jack reached out and blocked me from grabbing the bottle.
“I wanted to do something special for him,” I said. “And whatever you paid, I’ll double it.”
It was a stupid, idiotic thing to say. I didn’t have any money to my name besides the savings we had started to accumulate for the business. As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I regretted it.
Jack leaned back against the brown leather couch and continued to stare for about thirty long seconds. I was about to lose all hope, until he burst out laughing.
“I’m sorry, but I’m a little confused,” I said.
“Son, I’m messing with you. I’m an old friend of Holden’s grandmother,” he said.
I stared at him blankly. This whole conversation caught my off-guard. “You are?”
“The only reason I bought the damn horse was because I knew someone else would if I didn’t do it first,” he said.
I couldn’t help but smile. “So, you’ll sell me the horse?” I asked, a bit shocked.
“Well, I’ve taken a liking to her, but I don’t see why not. Let’s go take a look at her right now,” he said.
He stood up and led me out to the stables, holding a large flashlight. In the stable area, Sonny was sleeping. “Hey, girl. Someone came to rescue you,” Jack Hornton whispered.
The horse woke up and neighed loudly. “It’s okay, girl. He’s nice,” Jack whispered. “At least, I think he is. Are you nice?”
“I’m nice,” I said, putting out the back of my hand for Sonny to sniff me.
Within a minute of getting used to me, she stuck out his huge tongue and licked my hand. “She’s the most trusting horse I’ve ever met. It’s a shame to give her away, but she’s Holden’s horse. She’ll always be Holden’s.”
“Give her away?” I asked.
Jack laughed a little and opened the pen. “It would be wrong to charge you. Anyway, I owed the family a favor.”
“Jack, I can’t let you do that,” I said, reaching for my wallet.
But as my hand dipped into my back pocket, he stopped me. His smile had vanished from his face. “Seriously. She’s Holden’s horse,” he said.
I nodded with understanding. Holden’s deep connection with this horse was obvious to everyone in the area, and once Jack handed me the reigns, I felt the same gentleness that Holden possessed.
“Goodbye, Sonny,” Jack said. “And goodbye, Riley. I’m sure I’ll see you around.”
“Thank you, Jack. Holden is going to be incredibly happy,” I said.
I led Sonny back to her home before calmly sliding back into bed. Of course, Holden wasn’t in bed. He was wide-awake and waiting for me.
Chapter Nineteen
Holden
“Where were you, mister? I’ve been up for an hour now.” I stood in the doorway to the bathroom with a curious smile on my face.
“Well, I was going to surprise you,” Riley groaned. “But you just had to wake up.”
“You have a surprise for me?” I bit my lip and glanced at his crotch.
“Well, yes,” he said with a grin. “I was going to wait until the morning, but now is as good a time as ever. Come with me outside.”
“Outside? It’s nearly three in the morning. What could possibly be outside?” I asked.
“Just come. You’re going to love this,” he said.
Despite my fatigue, Riley definitely sparked my curiosity. I took his hand, and he led me outside. He started to prepare me for whatever surprise he had in store.
“You’ve been going through a lot lately, so I wanted to get you something that might bring you some more peace,” he said.
“Riley, what is this? You bought me something?” I asked.
But as soon as he led me toward the old horse stables, I heard a familiar guffaw. I felt the vibration of hooves. “Sonny?!” I screamed.
I was trying not to get too ahead of myself. It wasn’t possible. Jack bought him from my family, so it had to be another animal.
But then, I opened my eyes. I saw that familiar dark hair, with the gleam of white against the underside of his eyes. I heard him “speak” as he slowed down in front of me.
He stuck out his tongue and licked my face, turning his body to the side right after. “Sonny… it’s really you. But how?”
I turned to Riley who was smiling proudly. I was speechless. My guy had done a lot for me, but this was the highlight of my year. I didn’t know how to thank him enough.
“I made a deal with Jack Hornton,” he said. “The first time you told me about your horse, I knew what he meant to you. She isn’t just an animal. She’s a part of you, Holden.”
I walked over to Riley and took both of his hands into mine. “You have given me so much,” I said. “My heart feels so full. Every single day that I’m near you, I feel grateful. I hate that we ever left each other. How could we ever split apart?”
Riley squeezed my hands and let go to hold me. For a full minute, we hugged, feeling the warmth of our bodies. Then, Sonny walked over and nestled his head onto our shoulders.
We both began to laugh. We just felt good again. It was a strange feeling, since we had been going through so much lately.
“We’ll never leave each other. We’ll never lie to one another. We’ll never bring that form of darkness in our circle ever again,” Riley said. “From here on out, it’s about our family. So, tomorrow, let’s see your father. You can make your amends in person.”
I wiped the tears from my eyes. I hated that I was crying so much, but every emotion that I felt was heightened times ten. I was so happy that I didn’t know how to handle it.
I ran my hands through my horse’s mane. I leaned my face against him and kissed his stiff, muscular neck. For a few moments, we bonded. When I released, he neighed loudly.
“I love you too, Sonny. But this here is my man, so you’re going to have to get used to him,” I said.
Sonny sniffed in approval, and I slowly led him back to his old stable. When I returned, Riley took my hand. We walked out of the dusty area, finding a small spot near the barn, off to the side of he house.
Together, we sat staring at the stars longingly. We didn’t say anything, but we didn’t need to. The world was at peace, and we were ready to take on any issue that came our way.
“I’m nervous. What did the doctor say when you talked to him?” I asked my mother.
Andy turned around and patted my hand. “Don’t worry so much. He’s healing, but he’s going to make it.”
My mom was busy driving, but the look of fear in her eyes had finally dissipated. “He was a little out of it yesterday, but he’s getting better. This isn’t going to be an easy fix. I’m just so annoyed with him for testing the limits by climbing up on the roof,” she said.
“Yeah, well… I feel a little bit guilty. If I was here, I could have stopped him,” I said.
“Stop th
at. What’s done is done. It’s okay, Holden,” my mother assured me.
We pulled into the hospital, left the vehicle, and quickly walked toward my father’s hospital room. I was ready to go inside, but a part of me still held that worry. Sure, we talked on the phone and made some amends. However, he hadn’t met Riley yet, and I knew that he could be judgmental against my boyfriends.
As soon as my mother opened the door, all of what I was feeling went away. “Hey, mister daredevil,” my mother whispered. “How are you feeling?”
My father was lying in his hospital bed, strapped to a slew of cables and IV tubes. With a glazed look in his eyes, he glanced past my mother. He looked into my eyes and started to weep.
“My son… my omega,” he whispered. “Sit next to me.”
I hesitated before walking forward. I had never seen my father cry once, so it took me off guard. Little by little, I made my way toward him. Once I was next to him, a smile formed on his face.
“How could have I ever let you down?” he asked.
All of my childhood memories came flooding back. My father hurt me emotionally in so many ways, but he would never stop being my father. No matter what, this was mendable.
“I love you, dad. I don’t want us to fight anymore. I want everything to be whole again, like when Andy and I were kids,” I said. Then, bringing Riley closer, I said, “This is the love of my life, dad. Riley Chase. He’s the man I told you about. He’s a wonderful chef with high aspirations. We’re running a business together now. We’re having a child.”
“I never let you find out who you were,” my father said. “I thought I had the right idea about life. But there’s a whole world out there, and the times are always changing. And look at you! You’re pregnant with a baby. A grandchild. It’s a miracle. Riley, you’re welcome in this family. Both of you… you’re a part of our family.”
“We’re together now,” my mother said. “And that’s all that matters.”
My father kept me close to him. He nodded his head and gave a sigh of relief. “When I fell, the physical pain was nothing compared to the idea of losing everyone. I made so many mistakes. I was a hardened man. I prayed to God that I’d survive this, and somehow, I did. Now, I want to keep on the right path. I love my boys so much.”