Assuming it’s Danni, or maybe June, I pull the door open. What I’m not expecting is to find two kids standing looking back at me.
“Uh…hi. Can I…uh…help you?” I ask, looking over their shoulders for their parents.
“Is Dad here?”
My chin drops as I stare at the two dark-haired kids looking at me like I’ve got three heads.
“I…uh…” Just at that moment, Danni comes walking up towards the house with her arms full of bags. One look at my face must tell her everything because she immediately turns her focus on the kids.
“Alfie, Cass, give us a hand, will you? There are doughnuts in it for you,” she adds with a wink.
With one final look my way, they both turn, take a bag each off her and move towards her apartment.
“Don’t go anywhere, don’t do anything,” Danni warns me with a hard stare. “I’ll be back in a few.”
Not waiting for her to walk away, I slam the front door closed and flick the internal locks. I fall back against the solid wood, my head spinning with everything that’s just happened. The words “Is Dad here?” are on repeat in my head along with the two pairs of dark, familiar eyes.
Anger fuels my next actions. Scrambling up from the floor, I rush towards Harrison’s office. There’s one thing on my mind and I’m about to find out the truth.
Rummaging through his drawer, I pull out the keys I found a few days ago.
Grasping them tightly in my trembling fist, I march towards the doors. The two locked doors.
When I get to the last key of the set, I start to think I’m not going to get to see what’s inside, but as I hear the click of the lock, my stomach knots. I know exactly what I’m about to find, but it doesn’t stop the huge breath I suck in when my eyes land on the inevitable.
A pink horse-filled bedroom.
My eyes run over everything before I step inside and walk to the door at the other side of the room. Gingerly pushing it open, I find an identical room, only this one is blue with soccer memorabilia everywhere I look.
“Holy shit.”
Something catches my eye as I walk over to the bed. Stopping, I find a stack of photo frames. As I go through each one I find all the evidence I could need about those two kids on the doorstep.
Harrison’s a dad.
A dad to twins.
I stare down at their smiling faces and my heart falls into my stomach. How could he keep this from me? They are obviously such a huge part of his life. The way he’s looking at them in some of these photos clearly shows how much he loves them. How could he do this?
A banging from downstairs has me jumping into action. Leaving the photographs where they are on the bed, I race from the room, pull a holdall from one of the wardrobes and start filling it with stuff. My head’s in such a mess I’ve no idea if I actually grab anything useful. My only focus is getting out of here. He’s going to come back any time, and right now the last thing I want is to look at him.
The banging is insistent at the front door, and as I descend the stairs I can hear Danni calling my name. I might feel sorry for her if it wasn’t for the fact that she was clearly in on this little secret. How could Harrison tell his whole family to lie to me?
I sneak out of the back door feeling more defeated than I think I ever have in my life. All of them lied to me and I totally fell for it. I thought Harrison had truly welcomed me into his life, I thought I was his wife, yet he seems to have forgotten the two most important people.
I walk down the street with my purse over my shoulder and the holdall in my hand with no idea where I’m going or what I’m doing. The only thing I know is that I need some space. I can’t be there waiting for him. I need to get my head together and consider what’s next for me.
My love for Harrison isn’t in question. I think I’ll always love him no matter what, but can I plan a life with a man who’s lied to me so easily?
My stomach turns over like I’m about to throw up on the sidewalk and I stop for a few seconds to take a couple of deep breaths as realization suddenly hits me.
“You stupid bitch,” I whisper, earning myself a few strange looks from the people walking past. It’s not enough I’m standing here with makeup running down my face with as many possessions as I can fit into a bag, but I’m now talking to myself.
Once I’ve calmed down a little, I continue walking until I find a shop. It doesn’t take all that long—I’m in the middle of London, after all. After taking out a load of cash I walk inside and hurriedly grab what I need. I keep my head down the whole time, ashamed at what my life has become. Only this morning I thought I was on top of the world. How quickly things can change.
Shoving my purchases in my purse, I head back out. I need somewhere to stay so when I see the first sign for a hotel I turn and walk into reception.
I didn’t see anything other than the kind woman behind the reception desk as I asked for a room, but as I walk into the one she gave me the key to, I realize it’s much fancier than I was expecting. The cost didn’t even register; I just handed over a load of cash and let her sort it out.
Dropping my bags to the floor, I fall face-first on to the bed and allow my love for Harrison to pour out of me.
Harrison
“Why the fuck did you need me for this?” I ask Rachael as I stare at the computer she apparently can’t get to work.
“I just thought you’d know how to sort it,” she says innocently, but I can see right through it.
“I’m done with this bullshit. Call IT or something.”
“Yes, boss,” she mutters, pissing me off more than she already has. I’m done with this. I want to get back home to spend the night with Summer.
I can hear my phone ringing as I walk towards my car. Pulling it from the charger the second I’m inside, I see Danni’s name on the screen but it rings off when I go to answer it.
“What the fuck?” I mutter when the screen shows over ten missed calls from her and a handful of texts.
Choosing to read one of the texts to find out what she wants before I call her back, I open my messages. My heart sinks.
Danni: The kids are here. Get back now!
“Fuck,” I shout, slamming my palm down on the steering wheel as I back out of my space.
My drive home is a blur of panic and regret. Does she know? Why the fuck did I keep them a secret? Fuck, I knew this was all going to blow up in my face, yet I still lied to her. She was panicking about moving here and her life changing, and the second she mentioned something about kids, I just did what I thought was right to calm her down. Fuck.
Slamming the car door behind me, I run towards the house. I shove my key in the lock but nothing happens. She’s locked it from the inside. My shouting and hammering on the door must alert Danni to the fact I’ve arrived and she comes running from her flat.
“She won’t answer.”
“What happened?”
“Rebecca failed to pick them up from camp so they got themselves here. Summer answered the door.”
“Fuck,” I shout, running my hands through my hair for the millionth time in the last twenty minutes. “What the fuck do I do now?” Danni raises an eyebrow at me as if to say I told you this was all a bad idea. “Shut up, just shut up.”
Leaving her to head around the back of the house, I thankfully find the back door unlocked. As I run through the rooms down here, I have an aching feeling in my gut that I’m not going to find her. Taking the stairs two at a time, the first thing I see when I get to the top is Cassie’s bedroom door wide open with the keys hanging from the lock. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
“She here?”
“No, she’s not fucking here.” My panic stops my brain from firing properly as I stand in the middle of my kitchen, not knowing which way to turn.
All this is my fucking fault. I was trying to protect everyone. I wanted to ease them all into this new chapter in our lives but all I’ve managed to do is royally fuck up.
“Harrison, just calm down fo
r a few minutes and think. Where might she have gone?”
“I’ve got no fucking clue,” I bark at my sister. “She hasn’t been here long enough to have anywhere to go.” Just looking at Danni’s calm face pisses me off. I appreciate her rational thinking, but I also want her to be as pissed as I am right now.
“Sit down, for fuck’s sake,” Danni complains and my body does as instructed, although my brain doesn’t register the movement until I find a tumbler of whiskey sitting in front of me as she instructs me to drink it.
“Let’s think logically. She has nowhere to go so…she’ll be at a hotel?”
“Ah, that solves it. Thank you so much, what would I do without you?” I snap.
“I don’t have to be here helping right now. I told you it was a dick move in the first place. I should be standing here saying I told you so and allowing you to fix your own shit.”
“All right, I’m sorry. There’re thousands of hotels, where do we even start?”
8
Summer
As I sit staring at the fancy flocked wallpaper I can’t rid myself of the urge to talk to someone. My first reaction is to call Ireland but I already know she’s off with Easton, and the last thing she needs is to sit and listen to my misery. But if I’m honest with myself, it’s not her voice I want to hear. Swallowing down my apprehension, I grab my cell and dial a number that’s been ingrained in my brain since I was a kid.
My heart pounds as I wait for the call to connect. I convince myself that no one will answer.
“Hello?” Her soft and gentle voice has tears stinging my eyes immediately.
“Mom,” I whisper.
“Summer? Thank goodness you’re okay. Where on earth are you? We haven’t been able to get hold of either you or Ireland. We were beginning to get worried.”
“Why? Is something wrong?”
“Ireland’s nana was taken into hospital. She’s going to be fine, but her mum wanted to let her know.”
“I’m glad she’s okay.”
“Where are you, young lady?” Her tone brings everything to the surface.
“I’ve…I’ve been so stupid, Mom. I’m so sorry,” I wail.
“Shhh, …it’s okay, baby. Calm down and you can tell me all about it. I’m sure it’s nothing that can’t be fixed.” Her encouraging words don’t quite hit the spot because at this point I’ve no idea if this can be fixed.
“I’m…I’m in London.”
“As in, Ohio?” she asks sceptically.
“No. London, England.”
“Why?”
Sketchy memories of our wedding assault me and I sob to the soothing sounds of my mom on the other end of the phone.
“I got…”
“You got,” she prompts.
“Married.”
“WHAT?”
I can’t help the laugh that falls from my lips because this whole thing must sound utterly ridiculous.
“I met a British guy at work in Vegas and we got…married. I moved here with him but…”
“But?”
“I’ve just found out he’s been lying to me.”
“Where are you now?”
“In a hotel,” I sob.
“Oh, baby. Why didn’t you tell us you’d met someone?”
“It was all just so fast, and I didn’t—” I trail off, not wanting to say what I’m thinking, “think you’d care,” I whisper, in the hope she won’t hear.
“Oh, Summer. That is so far from the truth. Of course, we care.”
“But—”
“I know things haven’t been…right. But we’ve been under a lot of stress, and you suddenly moving across the country hurt us. I can’t lie about that. But we still care, of course we do. I’m so sorry you felt like you couldn’t tell us.”
“I’m sorry, too.”
“What are you going to do now?”
“I’ve no—” My words are cut off with a hammering on the door so hard I’m worried it’s going to come off the hinges. My heart jumps into my stomach. “Shit,” I whisper. “He’s found me.”
“SUMMER! OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR.”
“I think you might be right,” Mom says in my ear. “Go and talk to him.”
I nod, although she’s no idea I’m agreeing with her.
“Okay?”
“Yeah,” I whisper as I listen to his booming voice calling out to me.
“You go and talk to him. I’ll be here if you need me.”
“Thank you, Mom.”
“Anytime, baby. No matter what happens, I’m here and always willing to listen.”
Her words cause more tears to drop. “I love you, Mom.”
“Go and sort your man out,” she says before we both hang up and I’m left staring at the door that’s rattling on its hinges.
“Summer, I will take this door down if you don’t open the fucking thing,” he warns, and the apprehension that was just filling my stomach flows through my entire body.
I stand, my knees weak, and I’m almost at the door when there’s an almighty crash. It flies open and I’m flown back onto my ass.
“Fuck, are you okay?” Harrison asks, falling to his knees beside me.
Shaking my head to allow me a few seconds to register what the fuck just happened, I watch his face drop.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry. Shit. Fuck.” His hands gently cup my cheeks as his eyes run over me, looking for any injuries.
“I’m fine,” I whisper.
When his eyes eventually make it back to mine, they’re dark and full of concern. “I’m so fucking sorry, Summer.” Helping me from the floor, he walks us over to the edge of the bed. I’m too desperate to hear what he’s got to say for himself to respond.
He drops his gaze to his lap for a few seconds as he thinks. Sucking in a slow breath, he turns to me, his expression a mixture of dread and regret.
“I never meant to keep them from you, Summer. I just…” Raising my eyebrows for him to continue, he lets out another breath. “You mentioned me having kids waiting for you, and you were in such a panic about moving here that I couldn’t possibly tell you about them. I thought it would be what sent you home. I couldn’t risk losing you. I stupidly thought I could tell you later, but as each day went by, it got harder and harder to bring them up. I was trying to protect you all. Those two mean everything to me. Plus, I needed to think of them. I needed to know you were happy here before introducing you all. Rebecca has put them though so much already.”
“You think that I wouldn’t have understood that they need stability in their lives? You think I wouldn’t have agreed to be introduced to them slowly? Jesus, Harrison, what do you think of me?”
Dropping his head into his hands, he lets out a frustrated groan. “I fucked up. I know. I already hate that I have a past that’s affecting our future. I hate the shadows that fill your eyes whenever you think about Rebecca and my previous life.”
“You lied to me, Harrison. You’ve kept the most important part of your life quiet for weeks. You kept everything that showed they existed locked away, telling me they were storage rooms. What else haven’t you told me?”
“Nothing.”
“If there is anything, then now’s the time to tell me.”
“You know everything. I promise.”
His eyes urge me to believe him, to trust that the person sitting in front of me is the person that I believe him to be. Everything in me wants to trust him, but hiding those two from me is so massive. The rational part of me knows I’d be crazy to let this go, but as I stare into his dark, pleading eyes, all I want to do is believe him.
“Do you have any idea how it felt, opening the door to them?”
“No, I can’t imagine.” He sits looking defeated for a few seconds before he jumps up and starts collecting the few things I have scattered around the room.
“What are you doing?”
“Taking you home, where you belong.”
“Harrison…No, I—”
“I’m not going hom
e without you. I know you’re not going to forgive me just like that. But I won’t leave you here.”
“I’m not ready to go back yet,” I admit quietly. I’ve got too much to process right now. “What are you doing?”
“If you’re not leaving this room, neither am I,” he says as he toes his shoes off and gets comfortable resting back against the headboard.
“I came here to get away from you.”
“Not that easy, sweetheart.” The cocky grin he gives me has butterflies tickling at my stomach but I’ll be damned if I’m going to let him get away with this so easily.
Scooting back up the bed so I’m sitting beside him, I focus my eyes on the mirror on the opposite wall, refusing to look his way. His dark stare does things to me and I know it’ll have me caving if I look at him for too long.
“Tell me everything. Everything you’ve been avoiding telling me, right now,” I demand.
“Uh…okay. As I said, Rebecca and I had been together since we were kids. Our parents were, still are, friends and it was almost kind of assumed that we’d end up together. I’d loved her from as early as I can remember, and everything was so natural between us. As the years went on we got more serious. We went to the same uni so we could be together, our parents rented us a flat. Then not long after we turned twenty, Rebecca found out she was pregnant. It was a total accident. We both had said we wanted a family but not while we were still so young, and students, but we did what we had to do.
“Watching my babies grow was the most incredible experience. I’d wake up every morning excited to see how much her bump had grown. Everything was perfect. Until she had them. Then the postnatal depression kicked in and everything started spiraling out of control.
“I thought it would all work itself out. That she’d recover and become the mum I always believed she could be. And she was, in a way, for a while. We got married, moved into our own place. But then she lost one of her closest friends and she fell back into the rabbit hole. I ended up moving us all back into my parents’ place so I could have some support. Rebecca spent most of her time out with friends, socializing, spending as much money as possible and as little time at home as she could.”
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