by H. D. Gordon
“I meant what I said,” I replied, through clenched teeth. “I don’t like to fight unless I have to, but what choice do I have here? I have no money, no family other than Nelly, and nowhere else to go. If I have to fight to live then that’s what I’ll do. As far as I’m concerned that is fighting out of necessity. At least it’s something I’m good at.” When he opened his mouth to speak, I cut him off, standing up, I said, “And to be honest, where do you get off telling me that I shouldn’t fight? Last time I checked you fight for money too. What makes you different from me? And why do you even care what I do? You don’t even know me.” It was harsh, but I really couldn’t help it. I felt so angry and so wound up that I needed to let it out somehow. And honestly, I didn’t understand why he cared.
He stood up too and I had to plant my feet so that I wouldn’t back up. He was so much bigger than me that he literally had to lean his neck down to look me in the eyes when he spoke. I crossed my arms and waited for his reply.
“Fine,” he said, that unreadable expression back on his face. “You want to fight, that’s up to you. Follow me.” He turned and walked off toward a line of trees.
I stood there confused, before jogging to catch up with him. “Where are we going?”
He glanced back at me, but didn’t slow his pace. “You said fighting is what you’re good at, right?”
I nodded slowly, still completely confused.
“Well, then let’s go see if you’re as good as you think you are.”
Chapter 22
Kayden led me into the trees and we walked for about ten minutes before coming to a small clearing. I glanced around and turned to ask him what we were doing… and just barely had enough time to dodge his punch.
I side-stepped, causing his blow to glance off of my shoulder. It still hurt. My body immediately reacted to the threat, drawing my right leg back so that I was standing in a fighting position.
“What the hell are you doing?” I shouted, just barely managing to escape another blow.
He didn’t miss a beat, he just kept on coming. “At least your fast,” he said, stepping back and mirroring my stance. “But you have to do better than just evading attacks.” We began circling each other, my body tense and ready. “Stop this, I don’t want to fight you,” I gritted out.
He raised an eyebrow at this. “Why not?”
Just before I was about to answer, he lunged toward me, hitting me hard in the chest and knocking me to the ground. The breath was knocked out of me and my head spun for just a second. It was a feeling I was quite familiar with. That didn’t mean it didn’t hurt like hell.
Without missing a beat, I planted a hard kick to his stomach and sent him flying over my head. He was back on his feet before I was. And after a couple more exchanges on both our parts, he had me firmly pressed to the ground, face-down, with my arms pinned painfully behind my back.
My breathing was harsh and sweat matted my forward, but I was extremely aware of the way his body felt pressed up against mine. I felt ecstatic with him so close, even though I was in pain. That fluttery feeling in my chest grew stronger than ever. He was breathing heavily too, and the scent of him surrounded me in an almost intoxicating proportion.
His soft hair brushed my cheek as he leaned forward to speak in my ear.
“Not bad, Warrior, but not good enough.”
I bucked, but was unable to break free. “Yeah, well, a little warning would have been nice,” I said, still trying to break his hold.
He didn’t budge, instead, he laughed deeply, causing his chest to rumble against my back. “You had your warning, Warrior, back on the bench.”
“Stop… calling… me… that.” I was still thrashing around, and even though I liked the way his Scottish accent sounded when he said “Warrior”, it also pissed me off.
“Why, that’s what you are, right? A Warrior. The last true Warrior left.” He started to say something else and I slammed my head back, hitting him hard in the jaw, and giving me just enough room to escape. It was short lived, though, because after a little more sparring, I ended up pinned again, this time up against a tree.
My face scraped against the bark and my head was still throbbing from the head-butt, but I refused to let him see my pain.
But, when I started to lose feeling in my arms, I did something that I hadn’t done since I first began my training with my Mother. I surrendered.
“Fine,” I said through clenched teeth. “I get it. You win. Now, Let. Me. Go.” He spun me around so that I was facing him. “Do you? Do you get it?” There was a passion in his eyes and felt my heart beat kick into overtime. “Do you see what you will be facing, Warrior, do you? These people will destroy you. They will use you and use you and then, when you have nothing left, they will kick you to the side like some worthless dog! Is this what you want, Warrior? Tell me, is this what you want?”
At that moment, something in me snapped, so I was surprised when my voice came out calm. “No, this isn’t what I want,” I said slowly. I was confused, normally, I wouldn’t have taken the time to give an explanation, but being so close to him, I couldn’t seem to think straight. I wanted to explain, and I wanted to share my thoughts with him. I was beginning to worry about this wonderful feeling that tingled in my chest whenever he was near. It was starting to feel unnatural. I’m not someone who usually opens up to others. I prefer keeping my feelings to myself, but around him, I just felt… peace. How can something feel unnatural and yet, completely natural at the same time?
Reverting to my normal reaction, which usually involves anger or violence, was harder than it should have been. I should have punched him by now. Instead, I shoved him in the chest, hoping that the distance would allow me to think normally.
It did seem to help a little. “I didn’t want any of this,” I snarled. “I don’t want to fight people to be able to live, but this is the way it is.” I stepped forward and gripped his shirt in my hands. I wanted to touch him again and I couldn’t seem to help myself. “This, these,” I said, thrusting my hands in front of his face, “are all I have, the only things I can count on. You ask me if this is what I want, like I’ve ever had any choice. I never wanted to be a killer, but that’s what I am- a killer.” His face was impassive, but his eyes betrayed him. He was thinking about what I was saying. Good.
I raised my right arm and stared down at the silver tattoo covering its surface.
“Everyone keeps acting like this is some kind of badge of honor, but do you want to know what I see when I look at this?” I didn’t wait for him to answer. “I see my Mother, my Mother telling me to run, to run and leave her to be killed by monsters. I see the three monsters I killed without a second’s hesitation. I see death and pain and bad memories. Where is the honor in that? I’ll tell you, there is no honor, only death, death by my hands. So, no, I don’t want any of this. But this is what I am. A killer. That is all I know how to be and, yes, that is what I’m good at.” I said the words as matter-of-fact as I could manage, but the truth in them seemed to push me to the edge.
I felt the loss of his presence as soon as I turned away. I’m not sure what his face looked like, because I didn’t look back. I just headed back the way we’d come. I didn’t stop until I reached my apartment, fearing that if I did, I might actually break down and start crying, and there was no time for that.
I needed to rest before my fight.
Chapter 23
Nelly was waiting for me outside my room and upon seeing me, alarm lit up her hazel eyes.
“What’s wrong?” she asked. “What happened to you? You look like hell.” I looked down to see that my clothes were torn and bloody. I looked like, well, I looked like I’d gotten into a fight. I didn’t want to worry her, so I made up a small lie.
“Kayden was showing me some moves,” I said. “He wanted to make sure I was prepared for the fight tonight.”
She still looked worried, but it faded a little as she took in what I was saying.
“Who’s Kayde
n?”
I had forgotten that she wouldn’t know his name. “Oh, that, uh, guy who was carting us around all day.”
A small smile slowly crossed her face and her eyes widened. “No. Way. That super-hot guy was giving you private lessons? How did that go?” I gestured toward my attire and she nodded.
“That rough, huh? What else happened?” She wiggled her eyebrows and I blew out a sigh.
“Okay, okay, I won’t push it. But, I think he likes you.”
That was unexpected, and absolutely ridiculous. I thought back to my outburst just a few moments ago. “I seriously doubt that. Besides, he’s too old for me.”
“No he’s not. He can’t be more than twenty-five.” I raised an eyebrow. “You’ll be eighteen next month.”
I didn’t have time to respond, because Jackson stepped out of the elevator. He stopped when he took in my appearance.
“What happened? You look like hell.”
I rolled my eyes. “So I keep hearing.”
Just like always, he quickly recovered. “I mean, you look beautiful, like always, but, well, what happened?”
I didn’t feel like answering any more questions. “Nothing, just training, that’s all.
Look, I need to rest so that I can be ready for tonight. Where are you guys going?”
“They gave us new rooms over on campus,” Nelly said. “They’re giving us a tour in half an hour. I was waiting for you to get back to see if you wanted to come.”
“You guys go on without me. I really do need to relax.” And ice down the injuries I’d just received.
They gave me hugs and I tried not to wince when it caused pain to shoot up my back. Before they stepped on the elevator, I called out to them.
“You guys are coming tonight, right?”
They looked at me like I had two heads.
“Of course,” Nelly said.
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” replied Jackson.
Chapter 24
I was half-asleep, lying on my bed, when someone knocked on my door. I pulled myself up, wincing as pain throbbed in my head. I hoped I was up to what I would be doing tonight.
I opened up the door to see Scar standing there. I was a little disappointed that it wasn’t Kayden, but he probably thought I was some sort of psycho after what had happened. I pushed those thoughts aside. This was no time to worry about that.
“Are you ready, Warrior?’ Scar asked, in that gruff voice of his. I really wished people would stop calling me that.
I shrugged and stepped out, closing the door. “Guess so.”
To my surprise, he patted me on the back. Again, I had to work to keep from wincing. “Course you are,” he said, looping his arm around my shoulder. “Don’t worry, you’ll do fine. You were born for this.”
I nodded slowly. “Yeah, I was.”
We ended up in the same building we had had our meeting with the Council in.
This time, I didn’t notice any of the extravagance, all my thoughts focused on the task in front of me. We ascended the stairs and again took a left down the hallway; except, now, we stopped in front of the red door.
Scar turned to face me. “Don’t worry,” he said. “Clear away whatever thoughts are on your mind and focus on one thing: winning. Nothing else matters right now. Just do what you have to.”
I shut my eyes and took a deep breath, letting his words sink in. Finally, I managed to clear my mind and really focus on my task. I peeled my eyes open to see Scar looking at me.
“Why are you being so nice to me?” I had to know. After last night, I’d thought he’d hated me.
He shook his head, looking slightly ashamed. “I apologize for how I treated you.
But the security of our people rests on my shoulders, and I can’t afford to let just anyone through those gates. But you are a Warrior. Possibly the last true Warrior left, and for that, you deserve to be shown respect.”
I looked down at my arm and my words to Kayden came flooding back into my head. “I’m not so sure,” I mumbled.
He looked confused for a second and then he cupped my face with his rough hands and looked into my eyes. “I am,” he said. “Now go.”
Just before he opened the door and pushed me through, he mumbled, “Who knows, maybe you’ll be the one who will save us all.”
Chapter 25
I stood in what looked like a dungeon. The walls were stone and the place had a cold, damp feel to it. Unlike a dungeon, however, there was an opening in the walls that led to what looked like a dirt floor. Also unlike a dungeon, outside of that opening, I could hear the cheers of a loud crowd and the muffled voice of an announcer.
My heart was beating out of my chest as I walked toward the opening. As I drew closer, I could see rows and rows of bleacher-like stone seats that were jam-packed with people. The announcer’s voice rang loud and clear, and I bent over, clutching my knees, as I heard what he was saying.
We have a new applicant for our school of warriors. Alexa Montgomery will be facing Daniel Benson tonight in order to gain entry. If she manages to defeat him, she will be accepted in the ranks and gain Daniel’s status in the academy. Shall we meet our fighters?
I straightened up and was happy when it didn’t cause me pain. Adrenaline always did that to me. And with the amount of adrenaline that was running through me right now, I doubted I’d feel anything if a bullet hit me.
I was dressed in form-fitting sweatpants and a dark blue jacket with a black wife-beater underneath. I was sweating buckets, so I stripped off the jacket, no longer caring if people saw my marks. They would find out soon enough anyway, and the jacket would hinder my movements. I wasn’t even really scared now; I had only one thought in my head: kill or be killed. It was what my Mother had always told me. And even though I knew she wouldn’t be proud of what I was doing, I would make her proud of how well she’d trained me. More than that though, I would make myself proud. I would show these people what it really meant to be a Warrior. Because that’s what I was: a Warrior.
The announcer had already called the name of my opponent and if the crowd’s cheers were any indication, he was already standing before them. When my name was called, I stepped through the opening.
The crowd cheered for about half a second before a silence fell over the arena. I knew what they were looking at, but I didn’t spare them a glance; all my attention focused on the guy standing opposite me. He was about half a foot taller than me and packed with muscle.
I swallowed hard. I hoped his size would give me the advantage of speed.
The announcer seemed to stumble over his words, but I’d heard the only word I’d needed: BEGIN!
He started toward me. The way he moved, so cautious and calculated, sent my mind back to the Lamia I’d killed in the woods. The images seemed to awaken something in me.
Something I knew I should probably shove back, and something I didn’t.
Finally, he charged and my heart leapt in excitement. I slid just out of reach, turning on the balls of my feet and keeping my eyes on him for every heartbeat. I moved unlawfully fast. The crowd roared in my ears.
He spun and faced me, an uncertainty on his face for the briefest of moments before years of training forced it away. I was not an easy person to stare down. And though his gaze never wavered, I recognized the look behind his eyes. It wasn’t quite fear, more like the look one gets immediately preceding fear; a look of extreme apprehension. The regard one acquires right before everything falls to pieces.
I’d learned that at moments my speed could be ungodly. My strength could too.
But, I don’t believe these things were the reasons my opponent had that peculiar look behind his eyes. It was something else he saw. That same something that I probably should have kept leashed.
Everything around me faded away as I stood staring at my opponent. The crowd melted, colors blending together and faces disappearing. I couldn’t see anything but Daniel; this
boy standing between me and victory. I co
uld hear nothing but my heartbeat pounding in my ears. I watched his every muscle for movement. Speed and power coiled inside me like an angry serpent. That other me broke straight through to the surface as Daniel rushed forward. I waited for the last possible second, then spun to the side in what I’m sure was just a blur of movement to all spectators.
Daniel stumbled over the spot that had been my position a quarter of a heartbeat earlier. I spun around him once more, loving the feel of the power in my body. Mid-turn, I backhanded him so hard my fist cracked like thunder on his skull. Instead of feeling pain in my hand from the impact, I felt a small spark of energy. Somewhere in the distance, a crowd roared.
At that moment, I lost all control. I let go of all the hate and all the pain and all the anger that seemed to be drowning me over the last few days. And I let go of it on Daniel. It felt better than I would ever admit.
I went over to where he was now lying on the ground, grabbed him by the shirt front, and punched him hard in the face. Over and over and over again. With each blow I felt a zing of energy, bits and pieces of that magnificent feeling I’d gotten after taking the Lamia’s life.
I clung to it. Like the continuous draws of a chain smoker to please an insatiable need.
I felt myself departing also, as though I was slipping away, right along with Daniel.
I was allowing myself to become what I’d always feared most. I didn’t care. I understood the consequences of what I was doing, and I didn’t care.
As, I drew my fist back once again, a single voice smashed into my awareness like a stone on glass.
Nelly.
She was screaming my name. Screaming for me to stop. I’m not even sure how I heard her over the pounding in my ears, but I did, and it captured my attention like a bright comet streaking through a blood red sky.
My hand paused mid-air. The crowd still roared. I briefly remember scanning my surroundings for Nelly, not finding her, just seeing blur after blur of unfamiliar face. I looked back down at Daniel, down at my red-stained and steady hands, back to the crowd for Nelly.