“Should have thought of that before you went and fucked her Omari.”
Zackary’s words were cold and to the point, nevertheless I understood and respected his opinion enough not to challenge it. Which meant Zackary was the one that decided to change subject to a lesser issue. I felt comfortable enough, so we drank beer and continued to soak our sore bodies until we both found something of a happy place inside in our heads.
Later on that week, I finally met up with Sarah’s father for lunch over at Paschal’s. And as usual he was his optimistic self with a dash of pessimism that was complimented with the ability to be out spoken at a moments notice. Dr. Rice, a benevolent man who lived his life by a strict morel code that could never be compromised. A born Democrat and a hater of the opposite party, his multi facet demeanor was something that I strived for, but rarely ever achieved. As a result I generally looked forward to our once a month luncheon because it gave me the opportunity to learn and express how I felt about things. However this meeting of the minds was going to be a little different, which would explain why I was worried about the out come.
“Wha’s going on Doc?” “This fried chicken is wha’s up.” He said trying to sound hip.
“You almost sounded like the real thing Doc.”
“The things I do to try and understand the minds of the younger generation.”
I smiled at that remark before I waved over a waitress and placed my order. A moment or two later, Dr. Rice and I were staring at each other face to face as if we were trying to read each others mind.
“I’ve been informed by a very close associate of mines, that you’re about to go under the magnifying glass.”
“That’s news to me.”
“Stop fronting, you know what I’m talking about.”
“It’s a small thing…nothing to worry about.”
“That’s not what I heard.”
“Really, so what have you heard Doc?”
“I was informed that you were in cohorts with a certain politician.”
I felt uncomfortable knowing that he knew about the investigation, however I wasn’t all that surprised by his awareness. “Funny, I’ve heard that same rumor, so which downtown associate of yours leaked this information?”
“You know I can’t tell you that, however what I can tell you is this. Everything isn’t what it seems son, for example, I’ve been told that a certain person is behind all of this legal trouble that you are stuck in. I didn’t believe it in the beginning seeing how I thought I schooled you well in matters of the heart.”
“It was that exact frame of mind that you so painstakingly taught me, that’s got me in all this trouble in the first place. Now that I think about it, I swear, I think I would have been better off doing the wrong thing in that situation. Might’ve avoided this crap in the first place.”
“Maybe, then again a smart woman usually achieves and acquires what she desires Omari. Of course that soughtafter desire may end up being extremely toxic to her in the long run, however that doesn’t really come into play until its all said and done with.”
There was a long pause.
“So how do you feel about Barack Obama Omari?”
“I think he’s a very talented politician. Just wish I knew where he really stood on a few issues.”
“And those issues are?”
I knew where this might go, so I smiled and said, “We could be here all day discussing this, and in the end we’re going to agree to disagree as we always do. Am I right?”
“Generally.”
“So how about this; Of all the people in this country, African Americans distrust politicians the most, or, more accurately, they have been best trained to expect nothing from them. More than other Americans, they are always aware of the enormous gap between election promises and their daily lives.”
“James Baldwin’s Notes of a Native son. I’m impressed. But keep in mind that Mr. Baldwin was referring to a different time frame in this country’s history, and a radically profound group of people whose desire for change and equality doesn’t quite exist anymore. In retrospect, I’ll conclude by suggesting that things are little different now.”
“Is that how you see it?”
“I’m afraid so. You see Omari, I believe that a certain segment of our community actually believes and trust in our present day government. While the rest of our community is comfortably asleep, which is sort of scary, but all too true.”
“Failure of the Black Elite, your second novel right?”
“True.”
“And you thought nobody read that book.”
“Your dry sense of humor compliments you well Omari.”
“I do try.”
“Speaking of Baldwin, I read a rather Baldwin like rant on the Katrina situation just the other day. Would you like for me to email it to you?”
“Cool, so how school?”
“Sometimes, I wouldn’t trade it for the world Omari. Other times, I swear it’s stale, like tomb air,” Dr. Rice mumbled under his breath before he asked. “How’s the business life?”
“Business is great. It’s all the other bullshit that comes with it that sucks.”
“You should have been a teacher.”
“I like having my hair.”
Dr. Rice rubbed his baldhead and said, “In case you didn’t know, bald is in. It’s a shame that you’re going to let all that knowledge I gave you go to waste.”
“I think you’d be surprised how often I use some of that sociology of yours in my everyday life Doc. Besides, do you remember Keith Buellton?”
“Buellton, Buellton, didn’t he graduated at the top of your class with honors?”
“He sure did. And in case you didn’t know, he landed a great job with a small but very prominent marketing agency right after we graduated.”
“Why do I feel like you’re about to set me up.”
“You’re the one that knowingly walked through the door.”
Dr. Rice smiled.
“Anyway, Keith called me up a few months ago and explained how his company was competing for this multimillion dollar marketing contract. Evidently, they really wanted to impress this big time company, so they hired my company to cater this show and tell function that they were going to have. At the time, I was pretty booked upped; however I took a chance and made room on my busy schedule so that I could take the job. In the end, Keith’s little company suddenly became a big company after they won the contract, which meant Keith got a big ass raise that put him over the hundred thousand dollar mark, while I…”
“And the moral of this story is?”
“Just between me and you Doc, I just recently became a millionaire. Not bragging or anything, but that’s the difference between working for the man, and being the man.”
“I agree, and congratulations on your achievement. Still think you would’ve been great teacher.”
“Knew you were going to say that, so, how’s you and Sarah these days?”
“As usual, Sarah is being Sarah.”
“How’s that?”
“Mind yourself, last I checked, I’m still the teacher, and you’re still my star pupil.”
“I understand, but…”
“But what; you know how I feel about my family.”
“That’s the problem Doc. Your idea of family includes the entire Black race.”
“Better believe it.”
“You’re not going to make this easy are you?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh yes you do.”
“Couldn’t hurt if you’d tell me what’s on your mind.”
“Sarah and my friend are serious. You are aware of this right?”
“I didn’t know Sarah was dating Michael.”
“C’mon, Doc.”
“Really, when did that happen?”
“It didn’t, and you know it old man.”
“So who’s this other friend of yours?”
“I introduced him t
o you a few years back.”
“Are we talking about that wild hair having white boy that kept goggle eyeing my daughter at your graduation ceremony?”
“That’s the one.”
“What about him?”
“He loves her very much Dr. Rice, and I’m pretty sure Sarah loves him too.”
“Sarah falls in love at least once every five years Omari.”
“I don’t know about all that, but this here might be...”
“This too will blow over.”
“I disagree, then again if you have it your way, maybe Sarah’s cycle of falling in and out of love with a bunch of losers will continue. Is that what you want for her?”
“I want nothing but the best for my daughter, and she knows it.”
“Maybe she’s finally found what was best for her Doc.”
“Not possible, besides, Sarah knows exactly how I feel about race mixing. In fact you know how I feel about...”
“True that, but things…”
“If my memory serves me correct, you agreed with that assessment. So why are you here tying to put in a good word for the Jew?”
“First of all, I don’t see Zackary in that light Dr. Rice.”
“He is Jewish right?”
“He’s a damn good person, who I respect and cherish as a friend. In other words, Zackary is part of my family, period. So I would appreciate it if you didn’t refer to him in that tone of voice. As far as my feelings toward interracial relationship, yes, nothing’s changed.”
“I’m confused.”
“About what?”
“Your true motives Omari?”
I lowered my head slightly and privately asked myself the same damn thing before I said, “My beliefs, paradoxically as they are, have not changed. The problem is you’ve never accepted the full extent of my viewpoint, because if you had, you would know that I have always believed that true love doesn’t see color, class, or religion. Why? Because true love has always been too selfish and too damn busy to be bothered with such trivial matters.”
“Well put, In fact, you should give Oprah a call, I’m sure a certain group of her followers would enjoy hearing that.”
That remark was designed to agitate me into telling him what he wanted to hear. However I’m not the same man that constantly challenged him and others back in sociology 101. Instead, I was even more steadfast in my beliefs, but open minded enough to make changes when change was needed. So I let that fish bait float away before I braced myself for his counter attack.
“That was masterfully done, but let me challenge…”
“You can’t challenge me on anything Dr. Rice, because I’ve done exactly as you have taught me, by putting my money where my mouth is. And for the record, I have won too many battles to be challenged, or questioned on that subject.”
“I guess this conversation is over?”
I wasn’t ready for this conversation to end, so I decided to give him what he wanted, “I believe if everything was equal between the people of non color, and those with color, who and whatever they decided to love would be their business. Unfortunately, that’s not the case just yet, which means a people divided have no power or will to make real change. Is that what you wanted to hear?”
“Exactly what I wanted to hear, which means, you being here talking to me about my daughter marrying outside of her race is nothing short of hypocritical mumbo jumbo. Or shall I say, a tall glass of lemonade served without sugar. And we both know how that tastes don’t we? So are we done here?”
Doctor Rice calmly got up to leave.
“C’mon now Doc, sit back down so we can talk this out.”
To my surprise he didn’t respond, instead he immediately left the restaurant, leaving me alone to wonder if I had just lost a mentor, and a good friend.
“Shit!”
An unfulfilled legacy
Under an overcast sky that was threatening rain while I was heading home on my bike, I felt tired and depressed from a hard day of work. It all started early that morning when two of the most sophisticated network servers belonging to two of my biggest clients suddenly decided not to work properly. For the record, modern day network servers are specifically designed not to break down. But these two servers were not abiding by that rule, which meant I spent the better part of my morning sitting in front of a computer trying to fix them remotely.
With that situation nearly resolved, I received another phone call from the project manger that was in charge of that newly constructed subdivision in Texas. To my horror, he rudely informed me that he hadn’t seen or heard from Greg in about two whole days. If that wasn’t stressful enough, I was running late for an appointment that I had with one of my hardest to please Dreamscape clients. Animal rights activists can be a real pain in the ass when they want to.
Worried and over caffeinated, I addressed everything as professional as I could while the idea of being a father again kept edging itself in and out of my mind. The last time a woman told me she was pregnant; I rolled a damn double. In the end, I compartmentalized and prioritized everything in attempt to save what was left of my sanity. Unfortunately, the rest of my day didn’t get any better, so I was more than happy to see my front door and possibly my bed when it was all said and done for.
That moment of peace and tranquilly was denied to me because as soon as I stepped foot inside my house, Boney informed me that I had a visitor. I didn’t feel like having company, and was about to completely ignore the visitor until I remembered Zackary and Sarah asking if they could come over and talk to me after they got off work. At the time of the call, I was pretty much tied up with that picky ass client, so I tried telling them as polite as I could that I had to catch an early morning flight, which meant not to night in any language. However Zackary and Sarah needed to hear what her father said to me, and wasn’t about to let me skip town until they heard it in person. ‘I guess that’s what happens when you don’t say no’, I thought to myself before I reluctantly buzzed them up.
“You’re pissed aren’t you?” Zackary asked as he approached me.
“Damn right,” I said after I poured myself a drink.
“Look, Sarah and I both can understand if you’re upset Omari.”
“Really.”
“We thought this was the best way…”
“Bullshit, if you ask me…”
Sarah intervened. “I knew this wasn’t going to work, and for the record Omari. I tried to talk Zach out of putting you up to talking to my father. But he just wouldn’t…”
“Those sort of things happened when you love somebody Sarah. Its like, your ass can’t even think straight. You know what I mean Sarah?”
“Please don’t be mean with me Omari.”
“I told you this was going to happen back when you started this thing, remember? I vividly remember saying, Sarah, wrong father, wrong family. But know, you had to go and do it.”
“Fuck you okay Omari!” Zackary snapped before he abruptly headed for the front door.
“Excuse me, but I’m not the one stuck in the mud my friend.”
“Stuck in the mud,” Zackary barked back after he came to complete halt. “I knew you could be crude, but I didn’t think you’d go that low on me.”
“Crude, oh, okay, you wanna see crude, this is crude. If she loved you so much, why don’t she just marry your ass? I mean, y’all are grown ass people, so why don’t you two act like it. Yeah, yeah, your father is going to trip, and he might even try and disown you Sarah, but I guess that’s the price you hafta pay for going outside of the lines.”
Sarah’s bright yellow face suddenly turned red before she said,” Outside of the lines? My God, I wish you could hear yourself Omari, cause if you could, you would know how insensitive your...”
“Insensitive as in what you’re putting Zackary, and your family through Sarah. If you ask me, if you really loved that man, you’d be with that man, no matter what.”
I must have said something right, because Sarah g
rew silent before she too poured herself a drink. After drinking it all down, she stared up at the ceiling and said. “My family has always been my base Omari. People have come and gone, but my family has always been there for me.”
“Your father loves you very much Sarah, and I’m not going to blow smoke up your ass by telling you everything is going to be okay in the end. However, I think if you give him the time and the truth, I believe he’ll come back to you Sarah. But you’re going to have to accept the fact that he might never accept Zackary as part the family.”
Sarah was staring up at the ceiling when something dawned on her. Whatever the revelation was, it was powerful enough to take her back the way she came. Before they both left, Sarah turned and said.
“My father adores you Omari, which means eventually he’ll put this matter behind him. In my case, I’m afraid that might not happen between my father and I.”
With that, Sarah and Zackary walked out as if I would never see them again, causing my already terrible day to reach an even lower status.
A day after my heated conversation with Sarah and Zackary, Sharon and I were back in Texas trying to figure out what happened to Greg. After questioning a few of his clueless teammates, we discovered whatever caused Greg to suddenly disappear waited until he completed most of his assignment. This made the trip a little easier to bear. However I was still worried about his welfare because his teammates kept expressing how preoccupied he seemed during the final stage of the project. With that in mind, I checked the hotel in which he had been staying and discovered that he hadn’t checked in for about a week. Worried more than ever, I decided to contact the local authorities when Cece called and explained why she thought Greg had upped and disappeared.
Initially, I assumed Greg’s disappearance had something to do with his prior drug dependence, but of course that would have been way too easy. The truth of the matter was that Greg and September’s relationship had suffered a major setback after she discovered that he was seeing another woman who lived in Texas. For some reason Cece intentionally left out all of the juicy details, but I had heard enough to paint my own picture.
I concluded that Greg got busted when September came to visit him, and as a result he probably panicked and raced back to Atlanta in an attempt to salvage his sunken relationship. In my heart, I honestly believed this to be true and wished him all the luck in the world.
The Other Side of My Kitchen Page 19