by Mari Carr
Rick reached down and cupped her damp cheeks in his large hands as he pulled her lips to his. His kiss was surprisingly gentle given the intensity of his previous declaration. His dark eyes turned black with desire and Kate felt as though she were being sucked into a black hole, her soul was so enmeshed with his. She could easily lose herself inside this man…
The thought jarred something ugly loose inside her and she felt herself struggling to break free of Rick’s embrace.
“Kate?”
“I-I…” She was unsure how to explain the fear permeating her mind. She’d woken up in the past, memories of Zack threatening to overthrow her newfound self-confidence. Was she giving Rick the same power to hurt her? It was apparent the wounds her ex-husband inflicted hadn’t completely healed yet. Zack left her nearly a year ago and during that time, she’d learned to rely on herself. With Rick’s arrival, she found herself falling—hard.
How could she survive another controlling relationship? Zack had called all the shots in their marriage and Kate feared Rick would do the same if she let him. He certainly played the dominant role in the bedroom. How long before that commanding attitude trickled out into other aspects of their relationship?
Would she be able to retain control of her life and her hard-won independence if she fell in love with Rick? Or would she be lost again? She wished she could trust herself and her instincts, but the fact remained she was terrified that deep inside, she was truly a weak-willed, pathetic creature and, in time, Rick would discover that secret and exploit it just like Zack did.
“I need to go Christmas shopping.” The words flew from her lips without thought but as soon as she said them, she felt relieved. An out. She’d found a way out of the house for a while.
Rick was obviously blindsided by her unexpected comment. “Christmas shopping?”
“Yes,” she continued on hastily. “I just realized I haven’t bought a thing for Jill. With Wes coming home the day after tomorrow, I won’t have time.” Kate jumped from the bed and quickly grabbed the first clothes she could find before heading for the bathroom. “I really need to do this.”
“I’ll go with you.” Rick’s eyes narrowed with suspicion. He wasn’t fooled by her lie, especially since they’d spent the entire previous day shopping and she hadn’t bought a thing, but she didn’t know how to tell him the truth about her fears.
“No,” she practically yelled. “I need to go by myself.”
Rick stood still for a moment, no doubt surprised by the vehemence of her tone. “Why?”
“I—” she stammered, damning herself for her rambling stupidity. “Fine. I need to get you a present too. There, are you happy? I wanted it to be a surprise.” She was proud of the strength behind her lie. Truth was, she’d finished her Christmas shopping weeks ago, but it was the only excuse she could think of to get out of the house.
She needed time to evaluate her situation, to think. Unfortunately, Rick’s presence seemed to rob her of that ability.
“Kate.” He called to her from the bed and Kate was certain he intended to stop her.
“I won’t be long.” She called the words out over her shoulder, escaping to the bathroom and silently praying she could get to her car and away from the house as easily.
Rick stood at the front door and watched Kate’s car peal out of the driveway as if a bat out of hell were on her tail. He wasn’t sure exactly what happened this morning to spook her so badly, but he wasn’t completely surprised. Jill warned him she wouldn’t accept his suit easily. Rick hadn’t exactly been subtle in his pursuit of her. He told himself he’d practice patience, but that was a hell of a lot easier said than done.
He’d waited a lifetime for a woman like Kate and now that he’d found her, he wanted it all. The whole kit and caboodle. Kate in his home as his wife and mother of his children. He should have known it would only be a matter of time before she began rebelling against their closeness. After all, he hadn’t left her alone for more than an hour at a time since he’d returned home. Ever since his homecoming, he’d hovered around her like a mother hen, afraid of the moment when she would begin to question his motives and her feelings.
While his feelings toward Kate grew more solid as the days passed, it would be exceedingly difficult for Kate to open herself up to a sensation as powerful and all-consuming as love. He wasn’t carrying the same emotional baggage she was. He was fortunate that in his entire life he’d suffered very few serious blows to his heart. Of course, that was due in large part to the fact he hadn’t truly given his heart to another woman before Kate.
Meanwhile, Kate had given her heart to a man who was completely unworthy of it. She’d been taken in by a handsome face and charming personality when she’d been too young to realize not everyone was as honest as she was.
Rex roamed the yard while Rick walked over and sat down on the front porch swing. His whole being was screaming out for him to go after her, but he managed to hold back. She needed time to gather her thoughts. After all, he didn’t blame her for being suspicious of his sincerity. Their relationship could be called nothing other than a whirlwind. Even he found himself uncomfortable with the speed in which he’d fallen head over heels in love with her. Could two people really fall in love via email?
Originally he’d fallen in love with her mind, her sense of humor and her personality through her letters, and their time together face-to-face had only strengthened that feeling. The more time he spent with Kate, the more he was convinced she was the perfect woman for him. She put a spell on him he didn’t think he could ever break. Hell, he didn’t want to break it. His attraction to her was consuming, all-encompassing, and she had a body that was made for his hands, his lips and his cock.
Now all he had to do was convince her to take one more chance. Prove to her he didn’t want her to be anyone other than herself with him. Persuade her that by losing her heart to him she wouldn’t lose herself.
Determined to give Kate some time to herself, Rick attempted to distract himself from his worries by digging his favorite Kay Knight novel out from under his bed. Wes teased him unmercifully for “hiding” them there, but on nights when he couldn’t sleep, they certainly filled the time pleasurably.
Unfortunately, his mind refused to see the words. Finally, throwing the book down, he closed his eyes and let his thoughts drift back to how beautiful Kate looked last night. Her long black hair had brushed his cheeks as she rode his hard cock and covered his face with her sweet, soft kisses.
His mind kept repeating the mantra “she will come back” until he thought he’d go crazy. After three hours, his confidence in her return faltered, then failed.
Picking up on Kate’s habit of talking to herself, he began muttering, “Will she come back on her own?” The final tether on his self-control broke on the question and he found himself pulling his Harley out of the garage. The day was cold as shit, but he didn’t care. Maybe the drive would make him numb to the feelings swirling around inside him.
Sweet Kate better have purchased him one hell of Christmas present today because only something spectacular would soothe his ragged nerves.
Chapter 16
“Why are you at my apartment?” Jill’s question filtered through the phone and Kate could imagine the look of exasperation on her sister’s face.
“I thought maybe we should do Christmas here, just the two of us. Mom’s not coming home from Florida. I figured I’d do a little decorating while you’re visiting Wes. Are you staying there tonight?”
“Yes, I’m staying here, although God only knows why I bother. Thank goodness he’s being released tomorrow. I’m as sick of this joint as he is.”
Kate was pleased to learn Jill and Wes would be returning a day earlier than they’d previously thought. She missed her sister’s calming presence and much-needed advice, and Wes’s homecoming would help distract Rick.
“Wes, stop picking at those stitches. The doctor will be here in a minute to cut them out,” Jill admonished. Kate s
miled at Jill’s motherly tone. For some reason, her big sister had appointed herself primary caregiver to Wes and, much to everyone’s surprise, Wes accepted her in that role with relative ease.
“Well then, Cheryl could probably use my help with the dinner crowd.”
“Criminy, Kate. Do not attempt to help Cheryl!”
“I didn’t mean in the kitchen,” Kate said huffily. “Just bussing the tables and taking orders and whatnot.”
“What the hell did he do?”
Kate could hear Wes laughing in the background. “It’s only been a few days and she’s already tossed him on his ear?”
“Mind your own business and leave those damn stitches alone!” Jill yelled at Wes and Kate groaned at the thought of her sister and Rick’s partner discussing her ill-fated relationship. “What’s going on with Rick, Kate?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Kate suddenly felt frustrated at Jill’s questions. She hadn’t had time to fill her sister in on anything regarding Rick. Jill hadn’t been home in nearly a week, splitting her time between work and the hospital to the exclusion of everything else.
“Yes you do,” Jill said tiredly. “You were bound and determined to seduce the man a week ago. Now after only a few days in his presence, you’re hiding out in my apartment. What happened? Get too close to the fire, little sister?”
“You know, you aren’t as smart as you think you are, Jill. Things didn’t work out. That’s all. Besides, you said yourself, I set out to seduce him, not land a husband. Better to move out and on before any real damage is done.”
“Husband?”
“Did Rick propose?” Wes hollered in the background.
“Good Lord, no. Where would you get that idea?”
“You just said…oh never mind. Kate, there is a difference between having a casual affair and entering a serious relationship. You’ve got the hots for that boy bad and from the strained sound of your voice, I’d say the fire hasn’t been extinguished yet. Go back to the farmhouse. Stop being a coward for once in your life and do something real.”
Kate was taken aback by Jill’s harsh words. Her sister had never been anything but sympathetic and sensitive to her problems.
“I’m not a coward.” Kate was well aware that her tone could only be described as weak. Damn Jill and her lousy advice anyway. It was her life and if she didn’t want to jump into another serious relationship, it was nobody’s business but her own. Besides, it’s not like Jill’s track record with men was anything to write home about. She was the poster child for one-night stands. “You don’t know a thing about me.”
“I’m afraid I do.” Jill’s voice was weary once again. “I’ve let you hover in the background for far too long because I convinced myself that was where you were happiest. Kate, Rick cares about you and I think if you chisel some of that ice away from your heart, you’ll discover that you care about him too. He’s not Zack and never will be. You can’t kick yourself forever over a mistake you made when you were eighteen years old. Now get out of my apartment or I’m calling the cops and having you arrested for trespassing.”
“What?” Damn Jill. Kate knew only too well her sister would place that 9-1-1 call if Kate pushed her. “You can’t be serious.”
“I’m perfectly serious.”
Kate laughed at her sister’s haughty tone and let Jill’s words soothe her wounded heart. “I am a coward.” Kate’s voice tripped over the words, but it felt good to get them out.
“So be brave now,” Jill answered softly. “Take a chance, sweetie pie.”
“What if walks all over me?” Kate struggled to take a breath as the true source of her fears was revealed.
“Rick won’t walk all over you if you don’t let him.”
“Tell her if he tries, I’ll kick his ass for her.” Wes continued to chime in his two cents from the background, but this time his words drew a small smile from Kate.
“What if he cheats on me? What if he leaves me too?” Kate choked back unshed tears. For years, she’d claimed not to want Zack’s attention or affection and, despite the knowledge their marriage was a disaster, his desertion hurt—badly. It was silly to feel that way considering she’d practically pushed him out the door after the first year, but deep down inside, she thought if he’d ever cared for her at all, he would have pushed back and come home to her.
“I can tell you that won’t happen, honey, but those aren’t my words to say. Talk to Rick. Tell him what you’re afraid of. Listen to what he says and then you decide.”
“I’ve already told him. At least, I’ve told him some of it.”
“So tell him all of it.”
Kate sighed and considered Jill’s words. They were smart and probably one-hundred-percent correct and she still felt paralyzed with fear. “Jill?”
“Yeah, Katie?”
“Can I stay here? Just tonight? I promise I’ll go talk to Rick tomorrow, but I think I need a night to get myself together.”
“Of course you can stay. I’ll wait until tomorrow to call the cops.”
“You’re coming home tomorrow.”
“Even better. I’ll get to kick you out in person. I love you, Angel May.”
“Right back at you.” Kate grinned, feeling a bit better as she said goodbye to her sister.
Collapsing on the comfy couch, Kate pushed her worries away and fell into a sound sleep, letting her anxieties float away as she dreamed of a man with dark hair and sexy eyes that crinkled at the corners as he smiled at her.
* * * *
A knocking sound jerked Kate awake and she squinted into the now-dark room. The afternoon had clearly given way to night and she struggled to find the light switch in the dark. The knock sounded again and Kate realized someone was at the door. For a moment, she panicked that perhaps Jill had called the police, but she immediately dismissed the idea with a light laugh.
“I know you’re in there, Kate.” Rick’s angry voice came from the other side of the door.
“Shit,” Kate muttered, thinking she would have preferred the cops.
Opening the door, Kate had only a second to step back before two hundred and twenty pounds of muscle and furious male came barging in.
“Where the hell have you been?” Rick was obviously irate. Kate found herself taking several steps back in the face of his anger.
“Here.”
“Jesus, Kate!” Rick was clearly not pleased with her flippant answer. “You’ve been gone all day. The shops have been closed for hours. I’ve been all over this damned town three times looking for you.”
“Sorry.” It hadn’t even crossed her mind that Rick may actually have worried when she didn’t return to the farmhouse. No one had ever cared where she was before. Plus, she’d been such a bumbling mess when she left the farmhouse, she figured he’d be glad to be rid of her. “I should have called.”
“Yes,” he barked, “you should have! Dammit woman. I don’t know whether to kiss you or beat your ass, but God help me, I want to do something.”
Kate gasped as he moved forward so quickly she didn’t have time to retreat. Grabbing her shoulders roughly, he kissed her soundly and firmly, not giving her a chance to escape his lips or his hands. Not that she wanted to escape. Rick’s kisses were definitely going to be her downfall as she found herself not only succumbing to his embrace, but answering his passionate call with one of her own.
Rick was quickly losing the battle to restrain his howling demons. He’d spent hours worrying about Kate’s whereabouts, roaming from shop to shop. Realizing his roving was getting him nowhere, he’d pulled into Jill’s diner to question Cheryl and spotted Kate’s car parked behind the building. Kicking himself for not considering Jill’s apartment sooner, he’d run up the stairs behind the diner, taking them two at a time.
Breaking the kiss, he continued to scold her. “What the hell are you doing here?” He hadn’t thought to come here because he knew Jill was still in Harrisburg with Wes.
“I fell asleep.�
�� Her hands were gripping his hair almost painfully as she continued to kiss him, but he didn’t care. She was in his arms again and responding to his touch, rather than shrinking from it. This morning’s fears were no longer evident in her gorgeous blue eyes.
Reaching down, he pulled her sweater up and over her head in one swoop and silently rejoiced when she reached for the hem of his shirt and repeated his act. She shared his need to be naked—fast.
“Don’t ever run away from me again, Kate.” His fingers fumbled with the button on her jeans. “If you’re scared, talk to me.”
“I will.” Her hands succeeded where his seemed to be failing. Before he realized it, his own jeans were lying in a heap around his ankles. He released her and took a step back. “Take off those pants. Now.” Bending down, he made short work of his boots and jeans.
Once Kate stood before him in her bra and panties, he reached for her again.
“Doctor’s appointment?” he asked roughly, his intense desire stripping away what little remained of his patience. Kate had an appointment scheduled for this morning, but after the way she ran out, Rick was sure she’d forgotten.
“I kept it. Got the shot this morning.” She leaned forward and nipped at the tight bud of his nipple.
“Kiss me, Kate.” He cupped her cheeks in his hard palms, holding her against his chest.
The wet touch of her tongue drove him over the edge. Releasing her head, he gripped her arms tightly as he pulled her over to the couch. Before Kate could figure out his intent, he sat down and flung her over his lap.
“Rick!”
“Were you a bad girl today?” His hand lightly stroked her rear-end through her panties.
“Oh God.” Her breathing accelerated and Rick could feel the heat from her building arousal.
“Answer me, Kate.”
“Yes,” she whispered, her hips beginning their lovely rocking motion. Rick loved her unabashed enthusiasm for his lovemaking. She held back nothing with him, despite her natural shyness.
“I’m going to punish you, Kate.”