by Natasha West
He had it wrong anyway. It wasn’t just sex. Megan and Phoebe had seventeen years of life to catch each other up on.
Around day two, they were starting to get into more current stuff as they sat together in the bath. They’d gotten rather sweaty earlier but they couldn’t seem to part for the length of two showers so they’d settled on sharing a bath. ‘So what are you going to do about it?’ Phoebe asked, seriously.
‘What do you mean? There’s nothing to do. I told her to fuck off and she did’ Megan said, trying to get comfortable at the tap end.
Phoebe nodded, contemplatively.
‘What would you do, if you were me?’ Megan asked, truly wanting to know. Phoebe had always had a wise way about her and that was still the case. Megan needed that right now.
‘I can’t answer that. But I think…’
‘What?’ Megan asked.
‘I think you’re angry and you’ve taken this position on things and maybe you feel like you’re stuck with that opinion, that it might be weak to have a change of heart. But I’m starting to think it’s not the worst thing to change your mind, to let go of the past, if it only hurts you to keep hanging on to it’ she said, taking Megan’s hand. ‘But that’s me. I’m not in your exact position.’
Megan considered Phoebe’s words. ‘So… If I did? Change my mind, that is. Would it be weird… Actually, never mind.’
‘You want me to be with you when you see her.’
‘How did you know that?’ Megan asked, startled.
‘I would come, if you like’ Phoebe said.
Megan reached for the shower gel, affecting nonchalance. ‘Maybe then.’
And then later, as they watched TV in bed, it was Phoebe’s turn for a grilling. ‘How many? Megan was asking.
Phoebe tutted. ‘I’m not telling you.’
‘Come on, I won’t judge.’
‘I never did it with any groupies, alright?’ Phoebe admitted. It was always a source of embarrassment for her within the music community, but she was too old fashioned to sleep with people she didn’t know extremely well.
‘How is that possible? I’ve literally only been with groupies for years.’
‘And that’s gross’ Phoebe told her.
‘Come on, I was in the wilderness. You can’t have a go at me for picking the low hanging fruit. Anyway, I think I’ve had my last groupie. Do you wanna marry me?’ Megan asked casually.
Phoebe, who’d been sipping overpriced bottled water from the mini fridge, almost choked.
‘Do you need the Heimlich?’ Megan asked her.
‘No’ Phoebe said, coughing. ‘I need you to stop messing about.’
‘I’m being serious. You’re going away on Friday for two weeks. I’ve got to lock you down now, before you realise that I’ve hypnotised you with sex and you run back to the dentist.’
Phoebe shook her head, her throat now under control. ‘You don’t need to lock anything down. I’m not going anywhere. Well, I mean, I am, technically…’ Phoebe realised something. ‘Is this how it’s going to be now? It was incredibly sweet of you to cancel your gig, but in the long term, we both work on the road. How are we going to do this?’ she asked, anxiously.
Megan sighed, long and deep. ‘It’ll be tough. But I think that if we try, it’ll be alright.’
‘But why would it work this time? What’s different?’ Phoebe asked.
Megan shook her head, at a loss for an answer. ‘There’s no real reason it should. Except that we’re older and wiser.’
‘We are?’ Phoebe asked.
‘Well, we’re definitely older.’
‘So why will it last?’ Phoebe asked, her mind starting to calculate all the ways this could go wrong. She began to rub her temple.
Megan gently pulled her hand away. ‘Fitzgerald, breathe.’
Phoebe looked at Megan. ‘But you were right, I have been in a sex haze. I haven’t been thinking about all the real-life things, things that could get in the way.’
‘Then don’t. It’ll only go wrong if we let it’ Megan said, her tone surprisingly confident.
Phoebe felt somehow calmed by it. ‘So you’re an optimist these days?’ she asked her.
‘No. I’m a realist. Realistically, my life is better when you’re in it. So I have to do better this time.’
Phoebe smiled and leaned into Megan. She felt an unexpected peace descend over her. Yeah, maybe the odds were against them. Maybe it was stupid. But anyone logical would never fall in love in the first place, Phoebe realised. So despite all the evidence to the contrary, she had to try and believe this could work out. Because Megan made her feel calm and happy in a way no else had ever quite managed. She needed that. And she knew Megan needed her too. So they’d try. That was all they could do.
Megan felt Phoebe’s body begin to relax and they sat quietly watching TV for a few minutes. Game of Thrones came on. Megan smiled to herself but said nothing. They watched the whole show in companionable silence. It was better than Megan had thought.
A gurgle from Megan’s stomach broke the quiet. ‘Can we call room service?’ she asked.
‘Let me guess? A bacon sandwich and a coke?’ Phoebe answered, dreamily.
‘No. I never touch coke anymore’ Megan answered.
‘What?!’ Phoebe burst out, turning around in wild eyed astonishment. ‘You’re winding me up, aren’t you?
Megan shook her head. ‘Honest to god, I haven’t touched it in years.’
‘But you used to drink it by the vat, your veins ran with it. You’re telling me you gave it up?’
‘Had to. All that sugar and caffeine makes me jittery now. I guess some things really do change’ Megan said, taking Phoebe’s hand and bestowing it with the gentlest of kisses.
Phoebe smiled at Megan, a beam of sheer flabbergasted delight. ‘Maybe they do.’
Other Books by Natasha West
Hawke’s Prey
Hawke’s Game
Hawke’s Flight
The Plus One
Something for the Weekend
A Marriage of Connivance
Joined at the Hip
A Mistletoe Moment
Real Love