Chloe knocks on my door and I tell her to come in. She tells me she’s finished her work for the day and she asks if I want her to do something else. She wants to do something else? If my cock had its way, she would be on her knees sucking it with that luscious mouth of hers. We may have waited to do the act itself, but we had several years of oral fun with each other, and my cock remembers them well. I remember them, too. God help me, but despite her leaving me and now hearing that she slept around afterward, I still want her. I don’t know how this will continue to work.
“Ry. Are you going to talk to me at all?” She pulls me out of my thoughts by using my nickname. She has no right to that.
“Do not call me that. We’ve shared too much for you to call me Mr. Griffin, but you will not use my nickname. Do you understand?” I am barely holding on through my rage. And lust. Damn, but I want this woman.
“Yes. Yes, I do. I won’t do it again, Ryan.” She looks a little scared. Imagine what she would think if she knew that I wanted her to give me a blow job right now.
“So, you want some extra work, huh? I would tell you what I really want you to do, but that would be sexual harassment.”
Her eyes darken as she takes in my words. “I wouldn’t ever turn you in for that.” She walks over to my desk and starts typing something on my computer. Before I can stop her, she is printing something, signing the paper, and handing it to me. “Here.”
I read it, not quite believing what I see.
This is to certify that any sexual relationship between Ryan Griffin and Chloe Jamison is completely consensual and in no way sexual harassment.
“Are you kidding with this?” I ask her.
“No, I’m not. I didn’t just come here for a job. I want you back, Ryan. I will do almost anything to make that happen.”
“I can’t deny that I want you, Chloe, but it would only be for sex. I won’t be in any other kind of relationship with you again.”
“I can do that for now.”
“No, Chloe. You don’t seem to understand. It’s not just for now. I want nothing more than sex. I won’t take you out. I will take other women out and have you send them roses the next day. I’ll take my own pleasure and not care whether you come or not. You can do that?” God, I’m an ass. No, I’m not. She deserves it. I’ve never even thought about saying things like this to a woman, but I have to protect myself. This is the only way that I can think to do it.
“Y-yes. If that is all that I can have, I can do it. But I need something.”
“No. This is my show, Chloe.”
“Just one thing, Ryan. I need it. Please.”
I can’t deny her, even though I want to. “Okay, I’ll give you one thing.”
“I can only do this if I’m the only one you have sex with. You can’t fuck the women you take out. Only me. And no oral or anything else with them.”
I can’t let her know that all the women I’ve been with were just substitutes for her. So I continue to act like the biggest asshole on the planet. “Fine. Now lock the door and get on your knees. I want that mouth of yours to suck me like you used to. You can use some of the new tricks you’ve learned, too.”
* * *
Chloe
I obviously don’t have any new tricks, but he wouldn’t believe me even if I told him that. I can’t tell him, though. The consequences would be too big. And not just for me. I walk over and lock the door, and then unplug the phone. I know someone is covering the phones while I’m being “trained”, but I don’t want to take a chance.
I stand in front of Ryan and start unbuckling his pants. I push them down along with his boxers and see his beautiful cock pop free. It’s just as amazing as I remember, and I involuntarily lick my lips. “That’s right, sweetheart. Moisten those lips.”
I know that Ryan’s being crude on purpose, but it’s turning me on whether he intends it to or not. I sink to my knees and grasp him in my hands. He jerks and sucks in a sharp breath. I stroke him and then lean forward to run my tongue from base to tip. Ryan’s leaning back and holding onto the desk, not touching me at all. I lick him a couple more times and then take him into my mouth. He starts thrusting immediately.
“Yeah, Chloe, yeah. You love that don’t you? You love sucking my cock. I remember how you used to want me in your mouth, even when you were a sweet teenage girl.”
I do. I love his cock, and I’m getting worked up while I am working him. I start sucking harder and massaging his balls as his thrusting becomes more frantic. Ryan lets go of the desk to finally fist his hands in my hair as he comes on a roar. His legs are shaking as I swallow all that he gives me.
He pushes me back so he can move out from around me. “That was good, Chloe. Really good. Now, let’s talk about your real job.”
Good, only good? He has to be kidding, right? No, he’s not kidding. He just wants to punish me. Leaving me kneeling on the floor like a whore is his way of doing that. I can take it, though. I love him so much my heart feels like it will burst. I’ve loved him since I was 13. I’ve never stopped, and I know I never will. I just have to prove that to him now. Without being able to tell him my secret. That I left him to protect not only my father, but him and his family too.
Chapter 2
Ryan
Another two weeks have gone by. Two weeks since Chloe printed off and signed that agreement. She’s doing an amazing job now, both as my assistant and as my lover. No, she’s not my lover. She gets on her knees every day and sucks my cock. There’s no love involved. We haven’t kissed, and I haven’t allowed myself to take her, even though I want to be inside her badly. I dream of her every night. But I can’t do that yet.
I may tell myself that there is no love involved, but that’s a lie. I love her just as much as I always have. But I can’t let her know. I’m afraid that if I give in to my needs and take her, she will figure it out. I won’t be able to deny giving her pleasure. As it is, I have to use all of the willpower I’ve got to stop myself from throwing her on my desk and using my mouth after she sucks me off every day. I want to lick and suck her to orgasm so bad. I used to love to watch her come, and despite what I say, I want that again.
Not enough to show my hand, though. I can’t let her know that I’m not immune to her. That I do care. She said she wants me back, but she can’t have me. Not again. I waited five years with her, and then after we gave each other our virginity, she left me the next day. I’m not a fumbling virgin anymore, and apparently, neither is she. But the emotions on my part are still there. I need to show her that I meant it when I said that this was only about sex. And I know how.
I pick up the phone in my office. “Chloe, can you come in here please?”
She walks in and closes and locks the door with a smile. “It’s not our usual time, but I’m ready for you, Ryan.”
My cock, which was already hard from thoughts of her, twitches, trying to get free on its own. But that isn’t what I called her in here for. I need to stick to the plan. “No, Chloe. We aren’t doing that today. I need my assistant and not my whore.” I shouldn’t call her that, but I can’t stop myself.
“Oh. Okay.” Tears start to form in her eyes, so she turns away. I’m a fucking asshole.I remind myself that she deserves it. “What did you need?”
“I need you to call this girl and set up a date for tonight.” I scroll through my phone contacts and rattle off a name and number. “Then I need you to book us tickets to KA and get us a table at Emeril’s. Tell them I need the most romantic table they have.”
“I’ll take care of it now.” I know that she’s crying while her back is turned. I want to run over and comfort her, tell her that she’s the only woman I want. But I can’t do it. I can never do that. Andshe needs to realize that. I’ll let her pleasure me with her mouth, but she will not be my girlfriend again.
“Good. You can go now, Chloe.” She moves toward the door without looking back at me. Once she is gone I drop my head to my desk, shaking with emotion. Why can’t I stop bein
g in love with her? I want to stop being in love with her. I know in my heart that it will never happen. She’s the only one for me. I can’t let my heart rule me, though. I have to be logical this time around. I won’t let her break what’s left of my heart.
* * *
Chloe
I walk out of the office and almost run into Gary. “Chloe, are you alright?” he asks, and I force myself to look up at him. I can see concern in his eyes, but he also looks resigned.
“I will be, Gary. Thanks for asking.”
“Is Ryan mistreating you?” he asks me quietly. “I know he’s still angry with you, and I’ll always be on his side, but you shouldn’t be mistreated while working for us.”
Mistreating me? Well, if telling me to go down on him every day, calling me his whore and making me set up romantic dates for him is mistreating me, then yes, he is. But I agreed to this. Hell, I even wrote up the paperwork. So I have no one to blame but myself. I make myself smile. “No, Gary. Ryan’s not mistreating me. It’s just hard for me to be around him because I love him so much. I’ve never stopped loving him.”
“Why did you do it Chloe? We could all see how happy you and Ryan were together. When he told us you broke up with him, saying that you needed something different and were bored after being his girlfriend since you were 14, we were all shocked. You always looked at him with such love in your eyes, but you moved on the next day. To a boy who, if I am being honest, was and is one of the biggest assholes that I‘ve ever met.”
“I-I can’t tell you why I did it. I just had to. I did love him. I do love him. I want him back, Gary. I need him back. And you’re right, Adam is an asshole. You have no idea how bad he is.”
“Did he hurt you, Chloe?” Gary looks alarmed and angry now.
“Not physically, no,” I tell Gary honestly. Part of the agreement was that he could never touch me. I had it in writing, and he was more worried about losing his company than forcing himself on me, so he left me alone. At least in that way. He tore me down daily with his words, reminding me that he had taken the love of my life from me, showing me pictures of Ryan out with other girls. I will do whatever it takes to get Ryan back. To prove that I love him. If I have to be on my knees every day while taking no pleasure for myself to do that, then that’s what I will do.
“Are you sure that you’re fine with working as Ryan’s assistant? I know you’re not using your degree. I’ve seen some of your internship work, and it was outstanding. You’re a talented interior designer, and we could use you on our buildings. I can talk to him about letting you do more.”
“Are you unhappy with what you’re doing for me, Chloe?” I didn’t hear Ryan come out of his office.
“No, Ryan. I love working for you,” I tell him, hoping he gets my full meaning.
“But you want to use your degree, don’t you?”
I turn to him then and look him in the eye. “Yes. I do. I love interior design.”
He seems conflicted for a minute and doesn’t speak right away. When he does, I nearly die of shock at what he says. “You can maybe help me with the new building that I’m designing in Seattle. I haven’t assigned a designer to it yet. I’ll give you a chance to show me your ideas, and if I like them, the job is yours.” He sighs and then speaks again. “I still need you to continue with your other duties. Is that too much for you?”
“No, not at all. I can do it. Thank you so much, Ryan.” I want to grab him and hug him, but I control myself. I see a look pass between Gary and Ryan that I don’t understand, but Ryan obviously does.
“Don’t forget to set up my date for tonight, Chloe,” he says as he walks into his office with his father.
I take a deep breath and then set everything up. Of course the woman is free tonight and eager to go out with Ryan. What woman wouldn’t want him? I want him more than my next breath. The difference between me and her is that she can have him. I can’t. I need to keep reminding myself of that. I’m not giving up on getting him back, but I know that it’s probably not going to happen. I have to try, though. Even if I can’t tell him the reason that I left him, I can show him that I never stopped loving him.
* * *
Ryan
This date sucks. The dinner was excellent, and the show is always good, but I can’t get into it. The woman, Arceli, is really hot and seems like a great girl, but I’m not feeling it. When I took her out a year ago, we went back to her place and had a nice night. But I’m not interested at all this time. I can’t settle for “nice” when I know I can have amazing with Chloe.
She’s all I can think about. What would she have ordered for dinner? Would she have loved the show? I want to be sitting with her, holding her hand while we watch this Imperial story. I’m done fighting my need for her. I have to see her, now. I pull my hand away and take some money out of my wallet. “I’m sorry, Cel, but I have to go. Here’s some money for a cab.” I leave her there with her mouth hanging open and practically run to valet to get my truck.
I drive to my parents’ house and run around the back to Scott’s old place, the remodeled guest house. He’s letting Chloe stay there since he’s living with Yasmin now. He asked me if it was okay before offering it to her. I know he’s feeling conflicted, balancing his loyalty to me with his loyalty to John. I don’t love the fact that she’s here, but I didn’t want to stress Scott out, so I told him it was fine. John insisted on taking Chloe out to buy new furniture before he went back to Chicago, so I know she at least has a bed. I ring the doorbell and wait.
“Ryan? What are you doing here? I thought you had a date.” Chloe looks confused when she opens the door. She’s only wearing a tank top and boxer shorts with her hair in a messy bun, held together by a couple of pencils. Damn, she’s hot.
“I did have a date. But all I could think about was you.” Her eyes widen and her mouth parts when I move closer. I need that mouth, so I reach out and take it.
I kiss her softly at first because I think I have to get to know her mouth again. But I’m wrong. I know her mouth almost as well as I know my own. She stands there and lets me explore her lips. I take my time, kissing and sucking on them before reaching my tongue out to lick them. She opens her mouth on a moan, and I slide in, taking the kiss deeper. She grabs my biceps. I reach out with one hand to cup the back of her head and grip her hip with the other.
I guide her backwards, kicking the front door shut. Her knees hit the back of the couch, and she starts to tumble. I catch her and ease her down, breaking the kiss to look at her. Her eyes are a dark blue, and she looks as hungry as I feel. “Do you want this Chloe? Do you want me? If you don’t, you need to tell me now. Your job is safe. I won’t take you against your will.”
“Yes, Ryan. I’ve always wanted you. Always.”
Something snaps in me as I hear her words. “Always? Even when you were fucking all of those other guys? Were you thinking of me then, Chloe? Thinking that maybe I was better now than I was at 22?”
She sits up and looks me in the eye. “You should know that just because something is in the papers, it’s not necessarily true. Was everything they said about Scott last year true?” I shake my head. “I’ve thought of you every second of every day for the last three years, Ryan. And you were wonderful at 22. That night was magical. You made it that way for me. Yes, it was uncomfortable at first, but I felt your love, and you know that I came with you inside of me.”
“Do you want to come with me inside of you tonight, Chloe?” I ask, because I want that. I want to give her pleasure. I still won’t date her, but I’m not going to deny my feelings for her completely anymore.
“Yes, Ryan. I want that more than you could know.”
“Oh, I know. Chloe. I know that wanting.” I pause and tell her the truth. “I can’t date you, Chloe. I won’t take you out to dinner and a show. However, I don’t want you just on your knees for me anymore. I want to kiss you, and touch you, and make you come. I want to have you in your bed and everywhere else we can make it happen. I
want you to have as much pleasure from me as I have been taking from you. But it’s still just sex. I can’t give you more. I need to be clear about that.”
“I understand, Ryan. Now please bring your mouth back here to me.” She’s pulling on my shirt, and I can’t resist teasing her like I used to.
“You want my mouth, Chlo?” She stills her hands, and I realize my mistake. I just called her by her nickname. No, it wasn’t a mistake. When we’re alone like this, nicknames are okay. “You can call me Ry when we’re like this. Not any other times, though.”
She nods. “Yes, Ry, I want your mouth.” She leans up and takes it.
* * *
Chloe
I can’t believe Ryan is here with me. He left his date for me. He says that he still doesn’t want to date me, but he wants to make love to me. He won’t use those words, though. I know it will be sex or a fuck to him, but it’s a step closer to getting backing together, even if he won’t say it.
I raise my arms up as he slides my tank top over my head. “I missed these,” he tells me, taking my right breast into his mouth. He squeezes and pinches my other nipple while he licks and sucks on that one. I arch into him and nearly come from the sensation of having his mouth on me again.
I shove his coat down his arms and undo his tie. I’m unbuttoning his shirt when he stops playing with my breasts. He sits back and looks at me. “You want my shirt off, Chlo?” I nod, and he rips off the last buttons as he pulls it apart and then pulls his jacket off along with it. Holy hell. He’s even more built than he was three years ago. I involuntarily lick my lips as I trace my hands over his hard muscles.
Building Our Love (Griffin Brothers #2) Page 2