“So that’s how you like it?” she said, surprised by her own flirting.
He smirked.
“Thank you for staying,” YaYa said. “I thought I needed to be alone, but your company always makes everything seem better.”
“I hate that every time I see you, you have the same look in your eyes,” he said as he dried the last dish. He dried his hands with the same towel as she turned to him.
“What look is that?” she asked.
“Sadness.”
Tears. Those damn raindrops full of emotion that she had no control over flooded her again. She felt the downpour threatening to fall and she hated the fact that she was so transparent.
“How is it that you see right through me?” she asked.
“I pay attention,” he answered. He noticed her phone sitting on the kitchen island and he picked it up and dialed his own number so that it was stored in her recent calls. “I’m headed back to Flint soon, but if you ever need anything all you have to do is call, you understand. Anything, ma.” He graced her cheek lovingly and YaYa rested her face in the palm of his hand as she closed her eyes. She didn’t even realize that they had moved closer for a kiss until her lips were already touching his. She knew that she should pull away or stop herself, but she couldn’t and most importantly she didn’t want to. The way her heart raced and the feel of his strong embrace as he wrapped a hand around her waist to pull her near all felt too good. Their chemistry was amazing and for that moment he was the glue that welded her heart back together.
He pulled away first and shook his head as he stared at her. “This is messy. I’m in business with your man,” he said, already kicking himself for allowing YaYa to get to him.
“We can’t do this,” she whispered as she wiped her lips delicately with her thumb as if she could remove the traces of their kiss. “You should go.” The ultimate heartbreak resounded in her voice as she watched him turn away. She wasn’t sure exactly what she was doing or feeling but it was familiar. She remembered what it felt like to fall for someone, but how could she be falling for Ethic when she already had Indie? The problem was she didn’t know that she still had Indie. He had left doubt and given her room to think that he was loyal somewhere else. Indie had left just enough space for a refined gangster like Ethic to step in and show her the type of loyalty she craved.
She heard Ethic reach the door as he clicked the lock. “Ethic!” she yelled. She ran out of the kitchen and he turned to her as she ran into his arms. This time their kiss was undeniable as their tongues danced sensuously. His hands roamed everywhere. Palming her ass, tracing the contour of her body through the robe, finally gripping the back of her neck. He held her like he never wanted to let go. He made her feel like maybe, just maybe, there could be love after Indie. They pulled away from one another before they took things too far. They both were eager, wanting, but neither was ready to take it to that level. Ethic knew how it felt to fuck with YaYa would be love and war. He was ready to spark beef over someone else’s chick. In the end he knew that she was too in love with Indie to choose him. If she was ever given the chance, YaYa would repair her family. She wasn’t ready to leave; she just wanted to feel loved. It was because of that fact that he had to walk away.
“Take care of yourself,” he said.
“You too,” she answered. As soon as she closed the door she put her back against the wall and slid to the floor. She had no idea what she was feeling but now more than ever before she was confused. She didn’t know what she wanted. She was just lost.
Chapter 16
Parker and Indie’s past
Knock! Knock!
Parker made her way to the door, cautiously peeking out of the peephole just to be safe. When she saw Indie’s face she frowned. He never visited her this early in the day and she knew he wasn’t delivering any dough because he hadn’t yet hit the block. She pulled open the door.
“Hey,” she greeted with an unsure smile. “What’s going on? What are you doing here?”
“I’ve got something for you,” he said. He handed her an envelope.
“What is this? An eviction notice or something?” she asked sarcastically. She opened the letter and smiled in shock. Before she could say anything Indie picked her up, tossing her over his shoulder as he made his way across the threshold.
“I got an A, baby girl!” he said excitedly.
“Aghh!” she screamed playfully as he spun her around. She laughed as he placed her on her feet and he kissed her passionately. She didn’t stop him. Hey, a deal was a deal. She had promised him that he could take her out if he got an A on his exam, but she had a better idea. She wanted to stay in. She returned his efforts, pressing her body against his as she reached down and pulled his shirt over her head.
She loved everything about Indie, but he was everything that was no good for her. She needed him on her page. They had to be focused on the same things if he wanted her to trust her heart in his hands.
“Wait,” she said, pulling away as her chest heaved up and down lustfully.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“I’m so proud of you for getting the A. You did what I always knew you could do, but what does this mean? What does it change?” she asked.
Exasperated Indie swiped his face. “What you want from me, P?”
“I want you to say that this A leads to more A’s. That if I give you what I’ve given no other guy that you won’t play me. I want you to be worthy of it and I can’t lie, Indie, a nigga that’s on the block day and night isn’t worthy of it. I don’t want to be that girlfriend, wondering if you’re going to come home or not. I don’t want to go away to college in a year and leave you behind because you’re focused on the streets. If you want to do this I’m down, but I’m not the girl that wants to be the dopeman’s wife. That’s not cool to me. Indie, you’re smart,” she said as she cupped his face. “You can be a doctor or a lawyer or an entrepreneur. You’re so much more than the streets,” she said.
Indie let her go and went to his backpack.
“You’re leaving?” she asked, hoping that she hadn’t offended him.
He pulled a half a brick out of his bag and grabbed her by the elbow as he practically dragged her to the bathroom.
“Indie! What are you doing?” she asked as he lifted the lid of the toilet. He ripped a hole in the package and began to flush the product away. “Indie!” she shouted in shock.
When he was done he balled up the empty plastic and flushed that as well. He turned toward Parker and asked, “I’ma be whatever you want me to be, P. If you want a college boy, I’ll be that. I don’t know if my grades are good enough to get accepted to those fancy colleges you applying for, but I’ll try. If I can’t get into Howard, I’ll go to the community college nearby while you take classes at the university. Whatever you want, I’ll be that and if this isn’t it, I’ll give it all up,” Indie said, pouring his young heart out.
She rushed him, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I think I just fell in love with you,” she whispered.
“I know I love the shit out of you, ma,” he replied. “I just have one request.”
She frowned. “What’s that?”
“You’ve got to meet my moms. She not too pleased with all of the time you’ve been taking up,” he said. “But when she meets you, she’ll understand. She’ll love you because I love you and you’re doing what she hasn’t been able to.”
“What’s that?” Parker asked.
“You’re getting her baby boy out of the streets,” he replied.
Parker smiled as she thought of the day Indie came running to her apartment to claim her heart. He had not only walked away with her loyalty that day, but her virginity as well. I was so in love with him, she thought. To many people, their love was simply a phase, puppy love, and something to be discounted, but it was the strongest bond she had ever felt. That first time you felt something real with a man who saw the world in the same shade as you . . . it was unforgettable. She h
adn’t had the pleasure of feeling anything even close to that ever since.
“Ma, it’s your move,” King said, snapping her out of her daydreams. She grabbed the dice to the Monopoly board and was about to toss them when the doorbell to the suite chimed off.
“Did you order something, boo bop?” she asked, calling her son the nickname that she had used since birth.
“Ma! I don’t like it when you call me that!” he griped.
She chuckled and shook her head as he blushed. Her baby boy was truly not a baby anymore. He was growing into quite the young man lately. She pulled open the door without thinking twice and Indie’s face immediately made her heart drop into her stomach.
The anguish he wore on his face melted her anger into confusion, into love. All she wanted to do was pull him into her arms, but her stubborn Leo nature caused her to keep her poker face intact. “Did you send her over here to do your bidding?” she asked, crossing her arms and blocking him from entering.
“No, ma. I would never. You disappearing from my life again is the last thing I want,” he admitted. There was nothing but sincerity in his words.
“Ma, come on! It’s your turn!” King called out from inside the suite.
Indie’s eyes widened. “He’s here?” he asked, with a mixture of nerves and excitement causing inflation in his tone.
She nodded. “He is.”
“Can I meet him?” Indie asked.
Parker paused. For so long she had been the barrier of protection between her child and the hurt that the world had to offer. Letting Indie in would be like putting a slow leak in the tire. She was about to rock King’s world with the introduction to his father. A part of her didn’t want to, but she knew that it wasn’t her place to keep a father from his son. That was a bond that she would never understand and could never mimic, so instead she stuck up a warning finger. “If you hurt my son, I will fucking ruin your life, Indie Perkins,” she said with fire in her eyes as her voice trembled, emotionally.
“I believe you,” he said with a smile. She stepped to the side and allowed Indie to walk into the room.
She closed the door and then led him to the living area where her son sat over the game board. “King, baby, I want you to meet your dad,” she managed.
Neither Indie or King moved, but instead they stared at one another unsure of how to react. Indie’s eyes watered because he was literally looking into himself. King was a replica of Indie. Elaine had pictures lined up on a mantel that looked as though the child before him had posed in them.
Indie looked back at Parker, unsurely, but she looked just as lost as the two of them. He turned and swiped his hand over his head as he blew out a deep breath. “How you doing, man?” Indie asked.
“I’m G,” King answered.
Indie couldn’t help but chuckle as Parker shook her head while rolling her eyes in amusement. King had poked out his chest a little more than usual, put a bit more bass in his voice. Words like gangster, G, he had never used them before, but he was obviously trying to prove himself.
“I’m glad I finally got the chance to meet you, King,” Indie said.
“Where you been?” King asked.
Indie sighed as he wondered how he was going to explain this circumstance without pointing fingers. “I didn’t know about you, King. Your mom had a hard time getting in contact with me, but she finally found me and now that I’ve met you, I hope you’ll still give me a chance to be around. That cool with you?”
King chewed on his bottom lip and fiddled with his fingers as he thought it over. Indie had never felt so much heat in his life. His son, his mini-me, was sitting back debating about whether he wanted to know him or not. Indie’s heart was beating out of his chest.
“What kind of car you drive?” King asked.
Indie laughed. “I’ve got a couple, li’l man.”
“What’s your favorite?” King countered.
Indie turned to Parker again and she shrugged and said, “Answer the man!”
“My Phantom is a’ight,” Indie replied.
“You got a Phantom? You must be rich!” King exclaimed.
“Must be,” Indie replied, amused.
“You can teach me how to be rich when I grow up?” King asked.
“It’s in your veins, li’l homie. You’re going to shoot to the top,” Indie assured. “Now what you think? Can we do this father and son thing?” Indie extended his hand for a shake.
“Yeah, I’m cool with that!” King exclaimed excitedly, shaking his father’s hand. “You can take Mama’s turn. She’s no competition.”
Parker put her hands on her hip and cocked her head to the side. “Hey!” she frowned.
“You can be the banker, ma,” Indie said with a wink.
He removed his leather jacket and laid it over the couch as he took a seat. Parker got on her knees as she leaned over the board and King made it a point to sit directly next to Indie. His heart warmed as he made eye contact with Parker. This is what family feels like, he thought. As he looked at his son and the woman with whom he had created him, Indie realized that this was the vision that he had imagined when he was younger. This right here was all he had ever wanted.
They stayed up for hours until Parker regretfully had to bring the night to a close. “All right, King, it’s time for bed, boo bop,” she said.
“Maybe now that I’ve got a dad you can tell her to stop calling me that,” King complained as he stood to his feet.
“Yeah, I think you’re right. We can come up with something a little more G than that,” Indie said as he rubbed King’s head and pulled him in for a hug. King hugged him tightly and then ran to Parker, giving her the world’s biggest hug.
As he kissed her cheek he whispered, “Thanks, Ma, he’s way better than my friends’ dads.”
She watched him walk into the second bedroom of the penthouse and then turned to Indie.
“That was easier than I thought it would be,” she said, sounding relieved.
She bent down to pick up the pieces of the game but Indie grabbed her arm overcome with emotion and pulled her into him. He kissed her gently pouring out his gratitude into her. Parker’s body bowed as she leaned into him. “Come home, Indie,” she whispered. “Just be with us.”
He knew that it was wrong, but sometimes wrong felt right and when right was all wrong, confusion sent reason out of the window. He was acting off of emotion, taking directions from his heart. It was the only thing he trusted at the moment. He picked her up, scooping her legs from beneath her, their lips never breaking contact as he entered the master bedroom.
He wanted to be the man to walk away from the temptation, but it wasn’t his loins that was urging him forward . . . it was his heart. The chemistry between them had gone nowhere over the past eight years. If anything, absence had made them fonder of one another. She moaned, completely captive at his touch as he peeled her out of her clothes. His flesh pressed into her through the fabric of his slacks. Within moments they were naked. Skin to skin. Eye to eye. Chest to chest. The moment overwhelmed the both of them. Not another person in the world existed right now. Not YaYa, not Elaine and her meddling ways. This was their time and as Indie eased her onto the bed he lifted one leg until it dangled over his shoulder. He kissed her calf as he entered her. She gasped as he filled her. When she had run away she had left a boy behind, but Indie was all man now. As he bowed in and out of her succulence she matched his stroke aggressively. Their bodies intertwined like most intricate puzzle as they switched from position to position. From the bed, to the floor. He even hit her from the back as her breasts pressed against the floor-to-ceiling windows, overlooking the sparkling lights to the city. Making up for lost time, they peaked numerous times, until exhaustion willed them to throw in the towel. As they got in the shower Indie looked her in the eyes and said, “Thank you for my son.”
“You’re welcome,” she whispered. “Where do we go from here?” she asked.
There it was. Reality. Her words remin
ded him that life was waiting on him outside of the bedroom door. YaYa. Skylar. He lowered his head against her forehead as tension filled him. He loved YaYa, but he loved Parker as well. Now that he had met his son and Parker had opened her heart to him he couldn’t see himself living without her again. Then again, how could he live without YaYa? He had tried to let her go before only to realize that without her by his side a sizable void existed in his life. His dilemma was heavy. There was no right response.
“I don’t know,” he replied. “I need you to promise me that you won’t leave again. There isn’t a day that I don’t want to be in your life . . . in King’s life. When I saw him, I felt whole. King is like a do over for me. It’s a chance to watch myself grow up all over again, this time I get to stop him from making all of the mistakes though. I need him. I need you.”
Parker kissed his lips. “You have us, but we won’t be your best kept secret.”
“I’d never ask you to be,” Indie said.
Parker stepped out of the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. “Hurry up so I can see you out. My eyes feel like they are on fire. You’ve put me to sleep,” she said.
“See me out?” Indie asked as he rinsed and stepped out, grabbing the towel she was extending to him. He wrapped it around his waist.
“Absolutely,” she answered. “You can’t stay the night. King has never seen any man coming out of my bedroom. I don’t do that and until I know for sure what this is between us, he won’t see you laying up either. I want my son to respect me therefore you have to leave.”
“I respect it,” he answered. He dressed quickly and headed for the door. “I’ll be by tomorrow.”
She looked at him with doubt.
“Every day, he’ll see my face,” he said. He kissed her one last time, unable to resist. “Good night, P.”
“Good night.”
Chapter 17
YaYa sat back in the rocking chair, gently swaying as Skylar slept soundly in her arms. Usually it was a mother’s job to comfort her child, but tonight it was Skylar’s presence that was soothing YaYa’s soul. The unconditional love of her child gave her just the amount of support she needed to say “fuck you” to Indie. As long as she had Sky she didn’t need him. Fuck it. Or at least that’s what she tried to convince herself of. The minutes ticked by torturously slow as she anticipated Indie’s arrival. He had stayed out all night, which was uncharacteristic of him. Sleeping outside of their home was just something that they didn’t do. It was a deal breaker. YaYa wasn’t a naïve girl. Before falling for Indie, she was the type who thought all men cheated. As long as it didn’t come back to her she never tripped, but meeting him had changed her perspective. She had fallen so deeply in love with Indie that she had let love blind her. She had let Indie make her believe that maybe just maybe fairytales did exist. That’s why this sudden betrayal stung so badly. She hadn’t seen it coming and now that he was suddenly switching up it made her feel as if she might die. She had called Indie’s phone so many times that she started to call herself crazy. Each time she got his voicemail. She left no message simply because she knew that she would spew hate in his inbox, which may cause him to stay away even longer. A part of her only wanted him to come home just so that she could pop off. So much animosity sat on the tip of her tongue that it burned. She couldn’t wait to see his face. She had an entire monologue ready to go for that ass as soon as he crossed over the threshold. For him to have the audacity to walk out on her in front of their friends while announcing that he was going to see Parker had pushed her over the edge. First the embarrassment of their incomplete wedding, now this. Nah . . . YaYa wasn’t feeling that nigga at all and she was about to let it be known. The complacency of an established relationship often made people forget who they were really dealing with. She had played the back for too long and Indie had forgotten about the feisty diva that she had been before he had tamed her. He was about to learn today . . . if he ever came home, that was.
Love & War Page 14