Heat blasted through my body like a deadly tornado. Without even thinking about it, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled his mouth toward mine.
He pushed away, his face indifferent. “I think that answers that particular question.”
I blinked, coming out of the fog that clouded my mind. Fire inched up my neck when I realized exactly what I had just done. I had no control at all.
Good thing he did. I opened my mouth to thank him for not taking advantage. I was quite sure any of the others would have.
He waived me off. “That is not necessary.” His mouth turned in a smug smile that he quickly tried to hide.
“Go ahead,” I told him. “Gloat.”
On went his placid façade. “I have no desire to do so, Rayla. You have your answer. Now, what are you going to do about it?”
A thought occurred to me. “Would you take me to see Jessica?”
“What would that accomplish?”
I needed to see if she was as mindless as it had appeared when she was with Taylor.
“I don’t know if that is a good idea. Hers is a different circumstance.”
“Please, Taylor, I have to know.”
He took my hand. “Very well.”
Chapter Five
Taylor led me to the side of a large estate that was a tiny bit smaller than his main house. He’d told me Jessica was bound to an underlord named Braiden. He had assured me the transition had been seamless for her, yet I couldn’t forget the images of Taylor and Jessica together. How she had cried when he wasn’t with us after Zach dumped us in Eirie. She’d also screamed at the top of her lungs until Taylor returned.
The bench she occupied overlooked a sea of lush gardens. Her brown hair glistened in the bright afternoon light. The only way I was sure it was her was because I had a view of her profile. Unlike the last time I had seen her, her skin no longer held the pasty pallor I had once mocked. Guilt crept inside me. I’d been horrible to her. She hadn’t exactly been nice, but still. I wasn’t proud of the way I had treated her.
She turned. Her eyes weren’t brown like I thought they were. The vibrant green rivaled the plant life surrounding us. The effect had to be a bonus of bonding, but I could no longer label her mousy.
Her lips curved in an uncertain smile. She stared at me for quite a while, and I let her process without interrupting. I had come here to see for myself exactly how the bond had affected her. She rose to her feet. Her long neck combined with the way she moved made me think of the grace of a swan. This was not the same woman I had known at school.
She stepped closer, studying me. The most she had given Taylor had been a cursory glance. “I know you,” she said, confusion clear in her tone. “But how? When have we met, my lady?”
My lady? This was definitely not the Jessica I knew and loved to hate.
“I know!” She gave me a big smile. “It was at the fair last month, right?”
I shook my head, unsure if I was capable of speech at the moment. This was so not good. Sure, she looked fine, happy even, but where was the fiery girl that had pushed my buttons nonstop? Where was Jessica?
Taylor shook his head then said under his breath, “I knew this was a bad idea.”
It was time for me to open my mouth. “We didn’t meet at the fair, Jessica. We met at school, remember?”
Her fingers shot to cover her mouth. To my surprise, she giggled. “My name is Sabrina. You must be mistaking me for someone else. I have one of those faces, or so I’ve been told.”
No she didn’t. This fail was going from epic to catastrophic fast. “No. You are Jessica St. Claire. You grew up in Michigan. Your mother is a leader in the resistance in the human realm. You were three days away from your twenty fourth birthday when you were taken against your will.” I pointed at Taylor who was now red with anger. I didn’t have much time left, and I knew it. “Don’t you remember, you were supposed to bond with him when you came here?”
She frowned at me. “You are mistaken. I am happy to be here. I would never want anyone but Braiden.” She folded her arms across her chest in a very familiar way. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I think you should leave.”
Maybe I was getting to her. “You wanted to marry Adam Wilder. You didn’t want to come to the fae realms at all.”
A flicker of recognition fled across her eyes. She covered her mouth then let out a huge sigh. “Lord Taveon, would you please take this woman away? I am afraid I have a headache.” She whirled around and stomped toward the nearest door.
“Jessica! Remember him. Remember Adam!”
Taylor clamped a hand over my mouth. “That is quite enough out of you? Do you hate her so much you wish her devastated?”
I waited for him to remove his hand. “There is no way I am bonding with any of you!” I hissed at him. “Not after this.”
He grabbed my arm, stopping me from leaving like I wanted to. “I realize how this must look to you. Hers is a severe case. We had to remove some of her memories. It was done for her sake.” My eyes flew wide, but he didn’t let me get a word out. “It is better for her this way. Don’t you see? She did recognize you. Her memories are still there for the most part.”
“Well that’s comforting, Taylor. You people are more screwed up than I ever thought possible. This little charade is over. Take me to Tabitha.”
“Rayla…”
“Now!”
He took hold of my other arm. “Then what? What do you think you’re going to do? You have no allies to aid an escape. We would find you anywhere you went. There is no running anymore, my lady. I know seeing Jessica was a shock. I can feel your turmoil, and I do understand, but you need to calm down. There is more at play here than you know.”
I yanked away from him. “Why don’t you explain it all to me if you think it will make a difference? Although, I can tell you this, nothing short of a miracle is going to make me think bonding is a great idea.”
A brownie scuttled outside, asking that we leave. His mistress was distressed.
Of course she was. She was living a fake life for heaven’s sake. I hoped I ignited a burning within her to discover the truth for herself. No matter how much Jessica had bugged me back at school, I would have never wished something like this on her. She wasn’t even herself. She had to be in there somewhere; but from what I had seen, she was nearly opposite to who she had been. I could have just gotten her on an off time, yet that didn’t settle easily.
I let Taylor lead me off the property, preferring to walk rather than drift. This was not good, not good at all.
It took him a while to speak. It would have been so much easier if he would open his mind for me.
“After how you just reacted, that would be the stupidest thing I could do. You have no idea the damage you inflicted on that girl, and for what? Your peace of mind?”
I bristled at him. “She was in love before you took her. She has a right to know that!”
He edged closer to me, narrowing his eyes. “You judge so easily, Rayla. I wonder what you would have done in my place? Should I have taken you instead?”
My blood left my face. Knowing how strongly I reacted to him a while ago, I wondered if he would have been able to truly compel me in the tunnels under St. Mary’s College.
He waived a hand. “It is doubtful. We are connected now. Your reaction to me is based on the current state of things.”
I groaned, thinking about what I had done to Jessica. I didn’t want to hurt her. “Will she be okay?”
“Only time will give us the answer to that question. Braiden is bound to be furious. We had better get you back to my lands before he finds out why his new bondmate is distraught.”
I nodded. Why did I keep making so many mistakes? It was as if my mind wasn’t capable of processing everything it should anymore. I didn’t want to think that the real reason might just be that I was plain selfish.
The rest of my time in Uldran went pretty quickly. Training was superficial at best. Taylor hadn’t ta
ught me anything of significance, and I knew it. He distanced himself from me immediately after I ruined Jessica’s fae life, and I had no idea if he would ever forgive me for doing it. I’d been there when Braiden showed up at his house, demanding to see me. Taylor refused him but promised to help settle Jessica down once I was gone. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. I didn’t want her to be hurt, yet part of me hoped I had affected her enough to pull her out of the trance she was in.
My days blurred together, yet one thing remained unanswered. I kept feeling that strange sensation of being watched whenever I was outside, but Taylor refused to tell me what was going on. At first I’d thought it was probably some cloaked guard, but after a while I realized it would make no sense for Taylor to keep that information from me. Either way, I was on edge. My only hope was that whatever was watching me wouldn’t follow me out of Uldran.
I was about ready to learn where I was going next. Waiting was getting on my nerves so I practiced manipulating air. My skills were growing every day despite Taylor’s refusal to help me. In my left hand sat a pintsized whirlwind. The tail end tickled my skin. I let it go, commanding it to the ground then back to my hand like a bouncy ball. Dirt whirled in the tiny cyclone. I’d never seen a real tornado, but I was sure it would be amazing. The raw power of this miniature version astounded me. It left a path of destruction wherever I pointed it.
Once I was bored with that, my mind drifted back to which realm I would visit next. I couldn’t decide which place would be best, but I was sure I wasn’t going to ever have an opportunity like I had blown here again.
Jett’s approach hit me far sooner than when he entered the room. My body vibrated at his nearness. I closed my eyes and willed this to be a bad dream.
“Good morning, Rayla. I trust your stay in Uldran was enjoyable.”
Why did it have to be him? He frowned immediately. Great. He could read my mind, too.
I glanced around, but it appeared as though Taylor wasn’t going to say goodbye. Looks like I had done more damage than I thought. Without another word, Jett took my hand. The pull of the matter stream made me dizzy. Was I ever going to get used to drifting?
Eldrea, or, as I thought of it, the earth realm, was no more like what I had expected than Uldran had been. In fact, from what I could see it was as much of a wasteland as Ignis, only now I was in a vast desert instead of a winter land.
Hills of sand rolled as far as I could see. Jett stood beside me, gazing sidelong at me as if measuring my reaction. The queasiness from the ride here was starting to subside finally, and I was now capable of noticing so much more than when we landed.
As much as I attempted to not let him intimidate me, it wasn’t working at all. His nearness brought out all sorts of reactions from me, but I doubted they were the ones he hoped for. He was the kind of man that dominated a space, his very presence demanded attention. Worst of all, he still scared the wits out of me. His frown deepened.
No. I needed to be objective. I had to give him the same chance I gave Taylor.
He offered me one of his rare smiles, and I have to say the effect was astonishing. “You should smile more often,” I said conversationally.
He reached for my hand, his deep voice finding the inner part of me that melted at the sound, “I’ll have to remember that.” The touch of his warm skin sent tingles up my arm. He stopped just before we crested the hill. His brows puckered together as he studied my face. “Why are you so afraid of me, Rayla?”
Memories flooded my mind. My first recollection blotted out the rest. Me hidden in a closet while he yelled at my mom. Even back then I had reacted to his power, his demanding nature.
“I see,” he said. “I had hoped to have enough time with you to set a few things straight. Unfortunately, I have received word from Tabitha. You are to be delivered to Altasia in three days. There will be no fanfare here I am afraid.”
I nodded. Fanfare never really turned out great for me anyway. I guess Tabitha already heard what I had done in Uldran. She probably didn’t want me here long enough to cause more trouble. It was better this way, but a tinge of regret snaked through me. I had hoped to have more time because of one reason. The only reason that really mattered.
My mother was somewhere within this kingdom. Anticipation shot through my veins. Would I be able to see her at all now? I quickly covered that thought with one about how hot it was. Jett could use my mom against me. I let my insignificant thoughts rush onward.
Even though sweat already beaded on my forehead, I lifted my face longingly toward the sun. Being under water for nearly a month had gotten to me. The warmth cocooned me in the familiar comfort of home. With my hand still in his, Jett set off, pulling me up the hill again.
Once over it, my jaw dropped. A megalithic structure rose from the depths of the sand. Jagged and terrifying, it towered over us like a mythical beast from the darkest depths of hell. I wouldn’t have been surprised at all if it grew arms and legs just to crush me sooner.
Jett laughed. “You’re imagination kills me.”
I raised a brow. “You seem to be breathing just fine to me.”
He let out one last chuckle before a solid mask settled on his face. “We had best get started.”
Gigantic metal slabs that some might call doors swung inward at our approach, grating my eardrums in the process. “Is this place alive?” I asked, quite serious.
He led me through the passage and into another doorway. Much smaller, thankfully. “My lady, I will explain everything to you when the time comes, but first, I thought you might want to see someone.”
Was he actually saying what I thought he was? I turned my head, following his gaze behind me. Grey eyes identical to my own met mine from across the empty courtyard. My feet moved before my brain processed what I was doing. She smiled, hesitantly at first, then, it was her complete, glorious smile I thought I would never see again just a short time ago.
I choked back a sob. “Mom.” There could never be a more beautiful word.
I was there in her arms, taking in the sound of her ragged breath against my ear within seconds. She breathed my name so softly, I wasn’t sure I actually heard it. Not saying a word as I cried into her hair, she held me forever. Her silent tears trickled against my neck. No matter what else Jett ever did, I would always remember this—him giving me back my mom.
When I finally pulled away from her, I glanced around, trying to find him. He was gone.
“We don’t have much time, baby.” She cupped my face. “There is so much I want to say to you. I wish I could find the words.”
“Me too, Mom.” I circled her, lifting a strand of her bright blonde hair. “You’re just how I remember you.”
She laughed. “I wish I could say the same for you, honey. When I saw you in Lombarda, I could hardly believe how much you had grown. You are so beautiful, Rayla.”
A blush heated my cheeks. I hesitated, unsure how exactly to say what I needed to. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I know I messed up everything you worked for. If only Aunt Grace had told me.”
Her lips turned in a thoughtful frown. “It was too risky. We had no way of knowing initially if the sanctuary could truly conceal you.”
I nodded, but I still didn’t understand why it was so important to keep me hidden. “Were you worried about Jett finding me?”
A strange look crossed her face before she sobered and motioned for me to follow her over to a shaded corner. I slid in beside her on a stone bench. Not the most comfortable thing in the world.
She folded her hands across her lap, taking a sharp breath before she spoke. “Jafan is easy to misunderstand. I’ve told him this countless times, but as far as I know, it isn’t a priority for him.”
I couldn’t believe she was defending him. “I don’t want to marry him, Mom.”
She gave me a sad smile. “Then don’t.”
Her reaction confused me. Time to get to the point. “He said you and he had an agreement about your firstborn.”
> She grimaced then chuckled, her gray eyes twinkling. “He knew very well that I meant the children I will have when I am released to the mortal realm. None of us could have ever anticipated you.”
I snapped my head around, staring at her blatantly, feeling a rant coming on. “So you admit it. You promised him? Why would you ever do such a horrible thing?” I still needed time to gather the courage to ask her who my father was. I was hoping it was just some random guy she met somewhere. Well, that’s what I kept telling myself anyway. Truth was, I still didn’t know if I could handle it if my father was fae.
Her fingers covered mine. She should have had the hands of a forty-five year old, not the supple skin of a teenager. In some ways I couldn’t keep from thinking like the four year old she had left, but I wasn’t four anymore.
What she did bites. I waited for her to explain this great decision of hers. She had to have a good reason for agreeing to something so drastic; however, even with the imagination I had been blessed with, I couldn’t think of one.
She glanced away from me, making me believe she was ignoring my question. Then she looked at me again, her hands worrying the fringe of her gold dress. “Fear, Rayla. I did it because I had to leave the fae realms. Things had become too complicated for me. Jafan was the only one I trusted to keep my secret. I did my best to hide you from him, but he searched the earth until he found me. I had hoped to disappear completely once I realized I was pregnant. I wanted to raise you myself. Leaving you with Grace was my only option when he found us. It was only by the grace of God that he didn’t feel you in that closet.”
The image resurfaced, filling my heart with old terror. My voice came out a whisper. “I thought he had killed you.”
She feathered her fingers along my cheek. “Oh, baby, I’m so sorry.” I found myself in her arms. I was grateful. I didn’t want her to see the fear that had crippled me for so long. “I never wanted this,” she whispered.
I straightened, wiping my eyes. “It’s okay. I’m figuring things out.”
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