“How’re you feeling, Jake?” she asked him softly.
“I’m better now that you’re here,” he told her, tightening his hold on her hand when she tried to pull away. “Don’t.” His one word was a clear warning.
Claire sighed and nodded, allowing him to hold her close to him. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.
“For what?”
“I promised you that I would be here this morning,” she said quietly.
“Yes, you did,” Jake said, his voice strong. “Why did you break your promise?”
Claire shrugged and tried to pull away, but Jake would not allow her to remove her hand from his. “Please let go,” she whispered.
“No.”
“Jake.”
“Claire.”
Sighing in resignation, Claire sat beside Jake’s right hip and closed her eyes tiredly. “I can’t fight with you,” she told him, opening her eyes and looking down at him. She saw the hardness in his blue eyes and knew that he was not going to allow her to keep secrets from him.
“We’re not going to fight,” he told her gently. “What we’re going to do is figure out what the hell happened to you.”
“I’m too tired to talk about this right now,” Claire protested softly. “Just get some rest. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll stay in your room tonight.”
“Yes. You will.” Jake’s voice was determined as he agreed with her.
Claire laughed softly as she reached up and tugged on the soft locks that curled around his neck. “Are you trying to control me, Jake McKade?” she asked, smiling down at him.
“Yes.”
Claire’s eyes widened in surprise before they narrowed in determination. She knew about Jake’s need to dominate. She felt it whenever he touched her and every time that their minds had merged. But she also felt his gentle kindness. She would love to be his and have him care about her so deeply that he thought about her first.
“I know you just didn’t tell me that you want to bully me,” she told him softly.
“I never said that,” Jake said without hesitation. “I said I want to control you. There’s a difference.”
“Jake, you are not going to control me,” Claire told him firmly.
Jake gritted his teeth, clenching his jaw as he realized that his proclivity for domination was something that would never fly with Claire. He was a man who had needs that this gentle woman would never understand or agree to.
Claire rubbed at her eyes tiredly, sighing heavily. “When I give myself to a man, it will be done freely. You can’t demand it. If you think you can, you’re wrong.”
Jake remained silent. He knew that what Claire had said was correct. He wouldn’t want a woman to be in his life if she hadn’t chosen to be his. Her words just made him realize how far apart they were. Sweet Claire, his angel, would never agree to be a part of his life if she knew his deepest desires and needs.
“You know, you may think you have to demand things, but you don’t,” Claire told him gently.
“I would never force you to do anything you didn’t want to do,” he said, his voice gruff.
Claire laughed, tugging on his hair lightly once again. “As if you could,” she told him. She saw the surprise on Jake’s face and realized that this lost soul was hurting in more ways than she had realized. Opening herself up to accept his feelings, she saw the flash of intense loneliness deep within him.
She saw his pain and devastation when his parents had been killed. She saw the way he kept himself apart from his family, feeling that he wouldn’t be hurt if he wasn’t close to them. He expected everyone to leave him. He expected to be alone.
He was wrong.
Removing her hand from his, she stepped away from the bed and sat in the comfortable chair beside it. She couldn’t help the gasp of pain that left her when she settled back and the pressure on her shoulder reminded her of her injury.
“Get some rest, Jake,” she said finally, closing her eyes and trying to settle herself in a comfortable position.
Jake watched her silently, noting the expression of pain on her face when she leaned back against the chair and closed her eyes. This discussion was not over.
“Claire.”
“What?”
Jake smiled when Claire never opened her eyes to look at him. He loved her strength. She was certainly going to keep him on his toes.
“I need you to get into bed with me,” he told her, his voice deep and strong.
Claire’s sudden laughter made him smile. It had been a long time since he had smiled.
“You need that, huh?” she said, looking at him with a definite twinkle in her gentle, brown eyes.
Jake reached down and peeled back the blankets, looking at Claire with an expression that told her exactly what he expected from her. He was asking for her to do as he asked without question. She smiled as she slowly stood up and toed off her sneakers. Carefully climbing into the spot that he offered her, she settled against his right side and rested her head on his pillow, liking the way that they were sharing the space.
“I’m here because I choose to be here, Jake,” she told him gently. “Not because you demand it.”
“Okay, angel. Whatever you say,” he said quietly as everything settled within him the moment her body pressed against his. “I don’t care how you got here, just that you’re here where you’re supposed to be.”
“You’re a stubborn man, Jake McKade,” she whispered.
“Yes, I am,” Jake answered. “Do you think you’ll be able to deal with that, angel?”
Claire laughed softly. “I think you’re going to have to be stubborn and determined to get through the physical therapy that’s going to be needed to get you healthy,” she said quietly. “Will you promise me that you’ll work hard and deal with me telling you what to do?”
Jake smiled softly. “I will if you will,” he said after a moment.
“Deal,” she whispered, closing her eyes and allowing his soothing presence to wash over her. She had never felt such complete relaxation in her entire life.
“If you leave me during the night, I will come after you, bring you back here, and tie you to this bed,” he told her after a moment.
“Sounds kinky,” she said, smiling at the soft chuckle that left him.
“Yeah?” he whispered.
“Yeah. When you’re feeling better, you can tie me to your bed,” she told him quietly, laughing softly when a sound that was very close to a growl left him.
“Claire. What you do to me…” he whispered.
“What do I do to you?”
Jake took her hand and slowly pulled it toward his mouth to kiss her knuckles lightly. He gave her plenty of opportunity to pull away and was glad when she didn’t. He wanted her to get used to touching him. Someday, maybe with some time, she would be willing to become more intimate with him. He had a feeling that being with her was meant to be.
He couldn’t help the way his body tightened with his sudden need for her. Considering how banged up he was from his accident, he was surprised that he could even achieve an erection—but that was exactly what he had. Because of her. His cock was so hard it throbbed. He wanted to be able to make love to her. He wanted to bury himself deep inside of her and give her pleasure. He wanted to possess her, body and soul.
He wondered if she would be open to allowing him to do that. Would she accept every hidden part of his nature? Would she be able to see the goodness in him as well as understand his needs? He had hope. After so many years of isolation, he might have found the woman who was made especially for him. When she settled her hand over his as he rested his on her hip, he admitted to himself that he wanted this woman beside him all the time.
“I’ve never touched a man before, Jake,” Claire whispered, drawing his attention. “I’ve never really wanted to.”
“You haven’t, angel?” he asked, surprised.
“No. Not until now.”
The feeling of power and rightness that her words caused
to rush through him was instant. This woman was his. She would never be with any man but him. She was his gift. She was his mate. He knew this to be true with every ounce of his being.
“I used to watch you when I was a kid,” she told him softly.
“You did?”
She nodded and smiled. “Sometimes I would watch you and your brothers and your friends John and Tim when you rode by our property on your horses.”
“You should have come out to say hello,” Jake told her, wondering what Claire had looked like as a child.
“I couldn’t.”
“Why not, angel?”
“Well…” Claire hesitated.
“Well, what?”
“Sometimes my mother would punish me by locking me in the attic,” she admitted. “I didn’t really mind it. It helped to buffer the world from my mind.”
“Claire, no child should ever be locked away by their mother,” Jake said firmly. “How dare she do that to you?”
“I never really questioned it, Jake,” Claire told him quietly. “It was the way she was. To me, anyway. She didn’t punish my sister, but my sister didn’t have the ability to feel things like I did. I think I scared her. I still do, I guess.”
“That’s no excuse for her cruelty, Claire,” Jake whispered, leaning against her forehead and breathing in her clean scent.
“No. It wasn’t,” Claire agreed. “I’d never do that to my kids—if I ever get lucky enough to have any.”
“You’ll have kids, angel,” Jake whispered. He thought of Claire filled with his baby and smiled. He was looking forward to making that baby and watching her bloom with her pregnancy.
He reached up and touched her shoulder to pull her closer to him, freezing when he heard the moan of pain that left her at his movement. His erection was immediately squelched. His woman was in pain. That was not acceptable.
“You’re in pain,” he said firmly.
“Just a little bit,” she admitted.
“You hurt your shoulder?”
Claire nodded, easing away from him slightly to remove the pressure on her shoulder. When he reached up and unbuttoned her blouse to push it aside so he could look at her, she remained still. He tugged on the string to the light above his hospital bed. The room was flooded with the glow of the harsh lighting. She closed her eyes as the brightness assaulted her.
The purple discoloration on Claire’s shoulder made Jake furious. He touched it gently, wishing that he could take away her pain. He also wanted to beat the hell out of whoever had done this to her.
“What happened?” he demanded.
“I tripped and fell against the doorjamb when I was carrying my suitcase and backpack out of my room,” she told him quietly.
“You tripped and fell?”
His tone was one of disbelief. She knew that he wasn’t accepting her explanation. She nodded and had to look away as his blue eyes blazed with anger.
“Claire.”
She remained silent.
“You will never lie to me. Are we clear?”
She nodded silently.
“Tell me what happened.”
“I tripped and fell against the doorjamb when I was carrying my suitcase and backpack out of my room,” she repeated.
“What aren’t you telling me?”
Claire shrugged, gasping in pain as the movement caused a flash of agony to shoot through her shoulder. “I’m fine,” she said through gritted teeth.”
“No, angel. You’re not.” Jake reached up and gently caressed her cheek, tipping her face upward so he could look directly into her eyes. “What happened, angel?”
“My mother tried to stop me from leaving,” Claire admitted finally. “She said I’d never be able to survive in the outside world. My sister Elise agreed with her.”
“So they pushed you against the wall,” Jake said, knowing that what he was saying was true.
“No.”
“Claire.”
The warning in Jake’s voice was clear. Even though she didn’t want to admit to this incredibly kind and sexy man that she had been injured because of her mother and her sister, she couldn’t deny that his possessive protection of her made her get butterflies in her stomach. To be so cared about was something very unusual for her. She liked it.
“Okay. I guess I tripped because they tried to stop me,” Claire finally whispered.
“You tripped, or they pushed you?”
“A little of both,” Claire admitted.
“Damn it!” Jake yelled, making Claire jump and causing her to yelp in pain. “I’m sorry, angel.” He touched her shoulder lightly and held her while she breathed through the pain.
Reaching up, he pressed the call button for the nurse then returned his attention to the woman in his arms. She was the most amazing woman he had ever met. She was kindness and gentleness all wrapped up in beauty.
“I want you to get checked over,” he whispered when she looked up at him in question.
“I’m fine, Jake,” she protested.
“Listen to me, Claire,” Jake said, stopping her. He slid his fingers into her hair and massaged her scalp lightly. He smiled when she leaned in to his touch and sighed, closing her eyes and melting against him. “I need to make sure you’re okay.” He waited until she opened her eyes to look at him. “Please, angel.”
She sighed. “Stubborn man,” she whispered.
“Baby, you have no idea,” he told her.
The door to the hospital room opened and the nurse on duty came in. “Is everything okay, Jake?” she asked quietly, looking at the man she had known her whole life.
“I’m fine, Sandy, but I need you to bring Claire to the emergency room,” he said firmly. “She needs to have her right shoulder examined.”
Sandy Matthews nodded, waiting for Claire to ease herself from the bed. She had known Claire since they had attended elementary school together. Claire had always been such a nice person, but Sandy remembered her as always being so sad and distant. She was glad that Jake McKade was looking out for her.
When Claire stumbled as she tried to step down from the bed, Sandy reached for her as Jake did. Jake’s moan of pain filled the room, but he didn’t stop reaching for Claire and holding her securely so she wouldn’t fall. Sandy pressed against Jake’s shoulder to ease him back in the bed.
“I’ll take her, Jake,” she told him gently. “You need to settle back and rest.”
Jake hesitated, waiting until Claire was steady on her feet before releasing his hold on her and settling back against the bed. Sweat beaded his brow from the effort of his movements. He hated being weak.
“Sandy, I want to go with Claire to be examined.”
“Jake, no,” Claire protested. “I’ll be fine. You need to stay here.”
“I need to go with you,” Jake told her, his voice hard as he insisted.
“I can page Doctor Walters and ask him,” Sandy offered.
“No. Sandy, I’ll be okay by myself,” Claire insisted. She turned to face Jake and smiled gently, reaching out to touch his hand lightly. “Jake, how do you think it will make me feel to know that you were injured again because of me?”
Jake looked up at his sweet angel and felt completely unworthy of her kindness and compassion. “Claire,” he whispered, covering her hand with his. “I need to make sure that you’re taken care of.”
“Sandy will be with me,” Claire said gently. “I need you to stay put and rest.”
Jake was not happy with the way this conversation was turning out. Claire should not be telling him what to do. He should be telling her.
Claire had to turn around and hide her smile. Jake didn’t realize that she was able to hear his thoughts. He was broadcasting them to her loud and clear. She had never been able to hear another’s thoughts before. She had only been able to sense their pain and emotions. Having this ability with Jake made her know that she was meant to be with him. His touch shielded her from the pain of the world and his thoughts were vivid in her mind, y
et they didn’t hurt her.
“I’ll be back before you know it,” she told him gently. “You wait for me here. You can tell me what to do when I get back.”
She laughed softly at the surprised expression on his face. Turning, she walked toward Sandy and put up her mental shields. She was going to need them as she walked through the hospital as well as during her examination.
Jake watched Claire walk out of his hospital room. He didn’t like that she was being examined without him there to watch over her and hold her hand. She had to be hurting, not only from her shoulder, but also from the emotions that had to be rushing through her because he wasn’t there, touching her to act as her shield from the world.
She probably thought she was the one who benefited from his touch, but he knew the truth. He had never felt such complete calm within himself until she had touched him. Her touch and her kind heart made him know true peace. He didn’t want to ever be apart from her.
He needed to be with her to make sure that she was taken care of. He wanted her well. He wanted her back in bed with him, touching his body and making him feel the desire that he hadn’t ever felt so deeply before. Sure, he’d had relationships with other women. He had even dabbled in a relationship that satisfied his needs to dominate, but those relationships did nothing to ease the loneliness within his heart.
It seemed that only Claire could make him feel hope that there might actually be a woman who would accept him for himself, warts and all. He was a little afraid to admit that Claire might be that woman for him.
No. There was no confusion about it. He knew that Claire was meant to be that woman for him.
He also knew that he was somehow going to screw it up.
Chapter 5
Jake was getting more agitated by the moment. It had been nearly two hours, and Claire hadn’t returned. The door to his room opened and he sat up in anticipation, only to be disappointed when he saw the nurse who entered. It wasn’t Sandy Matthews, which made him concerned. Sandy must still be with Claire.
“Your monitoring is showing us an elevation in your blood pressure and heart rate, Mr. McKade,” the young nurse said quietly as she came closer to the bed. “Doctor Walters has left orders to administer a sedative to keep you calm.”
Jake's Angel [Cowboy Mates, Psychic Connections 4] (Siren Publishing Classic) Page 5