by Lacey Legend
“You have to stop the tears and move on from that vagabond. Did you hear he kidnapped his own brother?”
Kelsey opened her mouth to defend him, but her mother didn’t give her the option to let any of her words out.
“Now, I understand the excitement of going for the type of boy like Mason. He’s sexy and a little dangerous with an attitude and a poor upbringing. It can be fun for a while but then it ends. Period.”
The crispness of her mother’s tone told her that she was ready to drop the subject and move on. But Kelsey couldn’t let it go, not just yet. It wasn’t fair, she needed her moment and she was going to take it.
“How would you know? You met Daddy and that was the end of the story for you. You fell in love and got married and had me and lived happily ever after in this palace.”
Her mother dropped her arm completely from Kelsey and straightened herself.
“There are things in life that you just don’t know about. But just because you don’t know about them doesn’t mean that I don’t.”
Kelsey studied her mother… she noticed the tiny lines surrounding her mouth, from years of laughter but maybe there were some frowns too? The fire that resided in her eyes suddenly seemed slightly burnt out. Whatever she was hiding beneath the shadows was something she knew she’d never confide to Kelsey. It was a feeling she’d buried deep down in her that she couldn’t let escape lest she feel the pain all over again.
Then just as quickly as she’d seen her mother’s mask slip it was back in place.
“Now, you had your little tryst with the boy and yes, it did end up differently than most of these things do, but there is nothing we can do about that. You are engaged to Alan who is an excellent man and is going to take care of you and your daughter. That is all you can ask for.”
She was right and Kelsey knew it. Her time with Mason had been exhilarating and fun but that wasn’t the way to live a life. She needed to live it with someone who could provide for her and take care of her, the same way her father had for her mother. She needed to choose someone that was reliable and dependable, not someone who just disappeared in the middle of the night. That was the right life and she needed to choose it. There could be no more thinking of Mason late at night or dreaming about what might have gone differently.
Up in her bedroom, she was determined to make the changes she needed for her future life. Opening the brown packing boxes, she started rapidly packing her things away. She wouldn’t wait any longer; she’d move in with Alan tomorrow. He was such a good man to her and it was time that she started acting that way toward him. Who knew, maybe she would even be able to fall for him in some sort of way.
Maybe she’d never love him like the wild crazy way she’d hoped, but she was sure that given some time and some true effort she could love him enough to create a wonderful life with him. Maybe that was what her mother had been talking about before, that the wild ride was fun but it was fast and she had to have a life that could be smooth and steady.
That was the perfect way to describe Alan. He was smooth and steady, predictable, and calming. He wasn’t the rough and raging storm that Mason was, but she was sure that the stormy weather would have eventually gotten exhausting.
There was no way that all the fighting and the fire would have kept her burning hot forever, more likely it would have eventually just burned her. She was sure of it—she was making the right decision. Grabbing her phone off her nightstand, she sent a text to Alan. It was late and he would be asleep, but she wanted him to know that she was going to move in the next day. After it was sent, she felt stoic.
Looking around her childhood bedroom, she saw all of the things she had been mindlessly packing away while her thoughts had been traveling. The only things left in her room were items from when she was a little girl. A small jewelry box that opened with a ballerina spinning inside. A few teddy bears and dolls that she’d grown up dragging around from place to place. A wave of nostalgia rolled over her as she realized she was no longer a little girl. Sure, she was still in her early twenties, but she was going to be a mother and a wife.
Suddenly she felt weary. Her day had been all over the map of emotions between Mason and her sobbing and then her resolve to leave. She collapsed onto her bed with her eyes practically closing. Sleep was going to be important for the following day, she was going to need to be rested and strong. Tomorrow she was going to leave behind her girlhood and step into a brand new world.
“You’re moving today?” Her mother looked surprised, but not entirely displeased.
“Yes, I decided I shouldn’t put it off another minute. Alan is thrilled and has the house already prepared for me.”
Her father looked up from his morning paper and studied her for one quick second. Kelsey secretly hoped he was thinking about when she would sit at the table in her pajamas, her bare feet swinging as she ate her breakfast. Or maybe the way her hair used to go wild as a teenager before her mother started taking her to the salon to her it calmed.
She wanted him to ask her to stay, wanted him to call her baby girl one more time. Since she’d announced her pregnancy, there hadn’t been more than ice coming from him. But she hoped, that just one last time, he would see her as his little girl that he loved.
“You’re making the right decision,” he said to her. He flipped his paper back up and continued to read.
The coldness in his eyes told her that he still hadn’t forgiven her, that he was still upset. Her mother pulled her attention away though when she grabbed her hand. The tears were welling up in Kelsey but she looked at her mother’s eyes and she smiled.
“You’re doing the right thing.”
Kelsey smiled at her as best as she could. What her father was saying compared to what her mother was saying were two completely different things and Kelsey knew that. She gave a nod of understanding and continued to eat her breakfast which now tasted cold and flavorless.
There was no need to call a moving truck since she had no furniture she was moving, so instead they called a private number of movers to come and haul her boxes from her house to an address a couple of streets e over. Kelsey couldn’t help but notice that it was a waste of money, hiring people to move a few boxes for her, when there were plenty of people perfectly capable of doing that themselves.
Of course, she wouldn’t because of the baby, but Alan hadn’t offered either. A strong young man like him should have easily been lifting boxes and carrying them for her, but instead he stood off to the side as he supervised the men who were doing the work.
“I’m so happy that you decided to move in early. I think that’s the best decision you could have made.”
Alan wrapped his arm around her and kissed her head. This time she didn’t pull herself away but let herself feel loved. She needed it, she deserved it.
“I’m glad I’m moving in now too. It’ll make everything more… real.”
That was the truth and the only real word she could use to describe what she was feeling. Everything was now real. Her future as a wife and mother, the life in high society that she was clearly destined to continue to live, the path her mother had chosen was about to become hers as well.
“Shall we have a gathering tonight? To celebrate this amazing day.” The way Alan asked her didn’t exactly sound like a question and more sounded like a statement, that they would be having a get together that night, so she didn’t bother telling him that she wasn’t really up for it. She didn’t bother to tell him she was tired or emotionally drained, she needed to be excited, and she needed to celebrate. So instead of telling him no, she looked up into his dark eyes and smiled.
“That sounds perfect.”
He squeezed her around her shoulders tighter as the last box she owned was brought out of her room. Satisfied with the progress, Alan pulled her toward the staircase. But Kelsey resisted for just a moment.
“Do you mind if I take a minute?”
Alan looked at her briefly as if he couldn’t understand why sh
e would need a minute to say goodbye to her childhood, but he didn’t say a word and nodded instead.
“I’ll be downstairs in the car,” he answered her.
Kelsey smiled her thanks and turned back to her bedroom. With the boxes gone, her room looked incredibly large. She hadn’t realized exactly how big her bedroom suite had been until right at that moment. She took in the things she was leaving behind and thought of her memories of growing up. But whether she was ready or not, life was moving forward and she had no choice but to move ahead with it. Even if where she was moving wasn’t exactly where she felt she belonged.
Chapter10
The funeral for his mother was nice enough. Friends and neighbors arrived to share their condolences and he had so many casseroles in his refrigerator he didn’t think he’d ever eat them all. He knew that sending a meal to a family who was mourning was polite, but apparently when you are two boys whose mother passes away suddenly, people think that all you need is food. Why didn’t anyone think that maybe offering to take Adam for a day so Mason could get things situated in the house would be helpful?
Or why didn’t anyone offer to help him clean up the house that his mother had let fall apart? No, you can’t get too close to grief, it might be contagious. Instead he caught his neighbors, those he thought were his friends doing nothing but gossiping over what had happened to the boys and just how awful it was.
“She did this to herself you know. She was simply selfish doing this to her boys.”
“It wasn’t her that was selfish, it was that runaway husband of hers. He caused her to drink the way that she did.”
“Oh please. She was hitting the bottle long before he left her, leaving poor Mason to practically raise himself. I don’t blame her husband one bit for leaving her for someone better. He just should have taken the boys with him.”
“Oh all he did was run from the troubles, just as he taught Mason to do. Can you believe he kidnapped his own brother instead of staying and trying to help his mother? Like father like son. Between the two of them, that’s what killed her.”
If the women who were standing around gossiping about his mother had known that he was on the other side of the wall, he was sure they wouldn’t have said a word. But the fact remained that that’s what people thought of him and his family.
That his father was an unreliable runaway and he was no better, and that his mother was a disappointment that had drank herself to death because of the men in her life. Not that he cared either way what people thought, but what if it was true?
What if it really was his fault that his mother had died? Yes, the doctor had said that he’d warned her numerous times that her drinking was ruining her heart, but what if him taking Adam and vanishing had caused her to drink more and make her heart give out?
He was starting to feel the thirst for needing his own drink but he couldn’t do that with so many people still paying their respects after the funeral. If the gossip hadn’t been flying before, as soon as he poured anything that wasn’t water, then the rumors would really be going. And he supposed he couldn’t blame people.
He refused to drink in front of Adam as well. What he needed was to get Adam out of the house, just for a night. He had so much on his mind and so much to figure out with losing his mother and finding out he was going to be a father.
He was going to be a sole provider for himself and Adam as well as do everything he could to provide things for his daughter, though he was sure that whoever Kelsey was marrying had more than enough money.
He needed to sort his feelings out about that too. He was so angry at her for not feeling even the slightest things for him while he sat thinking of her all the time as well as not trying harder to tell him the truth about her pregnancy.
Mason stood over the kitchen sink, his head bowed trying to take deep breaths to calm himself down. He was still playing host and had to keep himself together. A hand on his shoulder made him jump and he looked to see little Mr. Pearson from across the street standing next to him.
“How are you holding up?” His voice was calm and still very strong for his age.
“There’s so much going on. I just wish I could take a night to figure everything out.”
He hadn’t meant to sound so desperate, it was just getting harder and harder to keep himself together. Mr. Pearson seemed to understand that and nodded along.
“Why don’t you let me and Mrs. Pearson take Adam for the night? This way you can get yourself situated and take a moment to yourself. I’ll go tell him to get pack up, we’ll take good care of him.”
Mason felt relieved and wanted to shout “yes please” from the top of his lungs, but he also knew taking Adam would be an imposition on the couple and he didn’t want to do that.
“That’s nice of you, but I can’t ask you to do that.”
“You’re not asking, I’m insisting. You take tonight to yourself.” With that his kind neighbor walked away, presumably to go find Adam.
Mason practically sagged in relief at the thought of the night alone. A few minutes later Adam came into the kitchen with a hangdog expression on his face. The boy grabbed Mason’s waist and held on tightly.
“Please don’t make me go, I want to stay here with you.”
Guilt at his selfishness flooded over him as he realized he hadn’t thought much about just how hard all of this was for Adam too. He’d lost his mother too and not only that but he was so young he had still thought she hung the moon for him each night. Adam hadn’t seen life yet for what it was. He should have been paying more attention to him, he should have been giving him the comfort he needed. But that thought just hardened his resolve that he needed that one night alone. He had to figure everything out so that he could find a way to give everyone everything they needed.
“It’s just for the night, okay, buddy? There’s a few things I need to do so that I can make everything better for us.”
“I want to see Mom. I want to see Judy.”
Both of the little boy’s desires hurt Mason inside. He would never see his mother again, and that thought alone was a hard pill to swallow. She may not have been much of a mother, but she was the only one that he had and she was gone. The mention of Judy’s name hurt him too. He missed her and the whole package of Elliotsville. For a fleeting moment he thought about picking Adam up and leaving again, back to the only place that had really felt like home. The thought of being back there, working at Ken’s again if he’d take him back, living in his apartment, seemed like a perfect dream. It was tempting, so tempting.
But if he left, all he would be was everything everyone was saying. He’d be a runaway just like his father was. As nice as the thought was to leave and never come back, he couldn’t leave his daughter. Forget Kelsey, she didn’t need him so he didn’t need her, but he wouldn’t forget his daughter. He wouldn’t be as bad as his parents who had left him.
“I miss them too buddy.” Mason kneeled down and hugged the boy. “But everything is going to be okay. I’m going to make it okay. Just give me tonight all right?”
Adam pulled away from him and wiped the tears away from his eyes. “Okay,” he whispered.
Mason gave him a last hug before Mr. Pearson ushered the boy out of the house. Most of the rest of the guests were also leaving and Mason said his goodbyes and accepted final condolences. As of tomorrow, this would be just the past to them, just a part of the town’s sad history. For him his life was completely changed forever, for everyone else it was just life on this side of town.
Another life taken by drinking or drugs. Mason shook his head at the sad thought of it all and once again the only thing he could think about was Adam deserving more, but now that he was going to be a father he really couldn’t leave.
When the door closed behind the last guest, Mason sagged in exhaustion against it. Watching his mother the way he had for so much of his life, turning to drinking was never something that he condoned. But this night was a night that he needed an escape; it couldn’t be h
elped. Walking to the kitchen counter which had been set up as a make-shift bar, he surveyed his options.
He grabbed a plastic glass and decided if he was really going to do it he was going to do it right and grabbed the bottle of whisky. Throwing a couple of ice cubes in the glass he poured the amber liquid over the top and he could smell the strength of it rising up from the glass.
“Cheers,” he muttered to himself and took a long swallow letting it burn a trail down his throat. He fought back the urge to cough it back up and instead took another swallow. Then another until it was pouring into him as smooth as silk.
There wasn’t much for Mason to do, with the house completely quiet and his ice melting in his glass. All he could do was sit and sort his thoughts, which he supposed was exactly what he’d planned to do for the night, what he’d needed to do, it was just not something he wanted to do.
The first thing he knew was that he couldn’t stay in their shack of a house any longer. He’d have to move him and Adam out of there. There was a part of town between the high class Vines and his lowly part of town where you could be middle class and live in a decent house. That was going to be his goal, to get a house somewhere in that part of town so that Adam didn’t have to grow up surrounded by all the negative things that his current area brought him.
He also wanted his daughter to see him as some sort of success. Picturing his future in this house, where his little girl would spend time in a mansion and then with him in his run down shack, he knew he’d never be able to feel like the father he wanted to be.
So he would need a new job, no more odd jobs or mowing lawns. He would need a real job, something that would allow him the chance to make a better life. He would do anything to move back to Elliotsville and have his life there, and if Kelsey wasn’t pregnant than he definitely would have done that without a second thought.