by Olivia Black
“Can I see him? I just want to see him for myself.” He didn’t deserve to see the man, but he needed to.
Mason turned the knob and opened the door, revealing the king-sized bed and an unconscious Robbie. The man had a huge white bandage covering his neck, shoulder, head, and part of his face. Lifting his right hand, Cody massaged his chest above his heart. He was having a hard time breathing as he stared at Robbie. The man’s eyes were closed, face lax, making him appear a lot younger than his thirty-seven years, even with the bandages. He could barely stand the sight of him without breaking down.
Moisture filled his eyes, blurring his vision. “Is—” He cleared his throat. “Is he going to be okay?”
Cody stared at Robbie from his position at the door. He didn’t dare step over the threshold and into Robbie’s space. He didn’t feel as though he belonged. He wasn’t worthy enough, not after he’d been so weak.
“He got lucky. The barbed wire barely missed the artery in his neck. I’m going to stay so that I can monitor him. If his condition worsens, I’ll have the helicopter from Telluride Medical Center come and pick him up. I’ve already given the folks there an update on his condition. Right now, he’s resting comfortably.” Doctor Perry stood up and stretched, cracking his back in the process.
“Here, Doc, take a seat.” Preston picked up one of the comfortable chairs that sat in front of the fireplace and put it next to the bed. “Are you hungry? I can bring you something to eat.”
“No, thanks, I’m good, but I could use some water.” The doctor moved his chair closer to the bed and sat down.
“I’ll run down to the kitchen and grab a couple of bottles for you.” Mason jogged down the stairs, his boots banging against the hardwood floor.
The doctor kept an eye on Robbie and so did Cody, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest.
“There are a couple of empty guest rooms. You don’t have to sit here all night,” Easton told the doctor as he walked past Cody.
The closer Easton got to Robbie, the more he yearned to go to the man’s side, but his feet stayed firmly planted in place.
“Are you going to come in and check on him for yourself?” Easton stared intently at Cody from his lover’s bedside.
He wanted to go to Robbie, but he couldn’t. He was too weak to be with a man like him. The guy had lost so much—first his mother, then his motorcycle shop, and finally the father he didn’t know. He almost lost his life and all because of Cody. Shaking his head, Cody took one last look at Robbie before walking away.
He just hoped that over time Robbie would be able to forgive him.
* * * *
Robbie peeled his eyes open and groaned at the sharp pain in his head. He blinked a few times, his vision slowly clearing. It took almost a full minute to comprehend that he was staring at the ceiling inside his bedroom at the ranch. Licking his dry lips, Robbie swallowed and cleared his throat. He tried to move, but his body felt heavy, his muscles limp and uncoordinated.
What the hell is going on?
“Hi.” Robbie jerked his head toward the voice and let out a yelp, when sharp pain ran through the length of his neck and shoulder. “Try not to move.” An older man came into view and Robbie made a face of confusion at the stranger. “I’m Doctor Perry. I was called out here to stitch you up. Do you remember what happened?” The gentleman lifted his stethoscope from around his neck and started taking Robbie’s vitals.
“I got hit.” Robbie remembered helping Cody mend the fences and then somehow, he’d ended up on the ground. “Where’s Cody? Is he okay?”
“You got hit with barbed wire in the shoulder, neck, head, and face. Somehow it snapped and cut you up pretty good. Or should I say badly? Anyway.” He shook his head, looking grim. “It took almost one hundred stitches to put your flesh back together,” the doctor told him vividly. He wrapped a blood pressure cuff around Robbie’s arm and started to press the bulb, filling it up.
“Cody is fine. He brought you back to the ranch and they called me. I gave you a tetanus shot and a shot of penicillin. I also have you hooked up to an IV for fluids since you lost a lot of blood. You’re going to need to rest and take it easy for a while. This bed just became your best friend.”
“Can I get some water?” he asked, his eyes drooping.
Doctor Perry brought a glass and straw close to Robbie’s lips. He placed the straw in Robbie’s mouth and he took a sip from his prone position. It was difficult to drink lying down, but he managed. Cold liquid trickled down his throat, and he drank greedily, trying to rid himself of the cotton-like feel in his mouth.
“Thanks,” he breathed out and closed his eyes, feeling exhausted.
“Get some rest.” The doctor patted his good shoulder in a friendly manner. “I’ll be here if you need anything.”
“Okay,” he whispered.
Thoughts of Cody ran through his mind. He didn’t know where the young man was, but he missed him. He’d gotten so used to seeing his beautiful, bright eyes and feeling his soft lips against his own. Where are you, Cody? That was his last thought as he fell asleep.
Chapter 6
Robbie was sick and tired of lying on his back.
Staring at the large clock on the wall, he watched as time slowly ticked by. He tried to stay positive, but with each day that passed, he started losing hope in Cody and their relationship. It wasn’t as if he thought they would get married and live happily ever after, but he thought the cowboy had real feelings for him.
Normally, Robbie would be able to switch gears inside his mind, but he was so focused on his cowboy, even after being abandoned after his injury.
He’d been stuck in bed on doctor’s orders for almost a whole week and he thought he might lose his damn mind. So far he’d had quite a few visitors, everyone except the one person he really wanted to see, Cody. Mrs. Hunt brought him meals, Doctor Perry stopped by to help him shower and change his bandages twice a day, and his brothers came in to talk. He had to admit that it felt good to be cared for, since he’d gone years being alone, even if he was bedridden.
Nobody mentioned Cody and they gave him vague responses when he asked about the cowboy. Easing up from the mattress, Robbie got to his feet. He didn’t bother changing out of the pair of sweats and T-shirt he was currently wearing. His mind was focused on Cody. He didn’t think that the other man had been injured. The doctor told him that Cody was fine. It didn’t make any sense to him.
Why wouldn’t Cody come to visit or check in on him? The two of them had something special. Didn’t they?
Robbie leaned against the wall by his bedroom door to catch his breath and clear his fuzzy mind as the room spun. He was weak, his muscles shaky after not using them. The door swung open and Easton strode in, carrying a tray of food.
“Robbie, I brought lunch,” he called out, probably assuming that Robbie was inside the bathroom.
“Thanks,” he said gruffly and Easton swung around, most of the contents on the tray falling to the floor with a thud.
“Jesus!” He balanced the tray in one hand, and with the other he covered his heart. “Are you trying to give me a heart attack?”
“I want to eat downstairs. I want to see Cody.” His voice sounded whiny to his own ears and he blamed the pain medication.
“You look like you’re going to fall over. Are you sure you can make it downstairs?” Easton arched a disbelieving brow.
“With some help I can make it.” He wasn’t too proud to admit that he needed help getting down the stairs without falling flat on his face.
After the barbed wire incident he didn’t want to wrestle with a flight of stairs. He didn’t want to take a tumble down the hard wooden stairs and end up with a broken leg or worse, his neck.
“He’s not downstairs,” Easton said, looking down at his feet. “Cody hasn’t come to the house to eat since you got hurt.”
“I don’t understand.” Robbie shook his head, feeling confused. Where would Cody eat? Mrs. Hunt was the cook. She m
ade breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It made no sense. “He doesn’t want to see me.” Lifting his uninjured hand, Robbie touched the bandage on his face.
“It has nothing to do with your injuries.” Easton’s voice had a compassionate tone.
“Huh.” Robbie didn’t really know how to respond. Cody’s obvious rejection cut deep, deeper than he was willing to admit to Easton.
“I really believe that Cody just feels guilty you got hurt. It’s hard to see someone you care about sick or injured.”
“If he really cared, he’d be by my side.” Leaning his head back against the wall, Robbie stared at the ceiling.
He didn’t want to venture downstairs, not now that he knew the truth about Cody’s feelings. It was embarrassing.
“Thanks for bringing me lunch.” Robbie cleared the emotion from his throat. “I’ll just get back into bed and eat.”
“Let me help you downstairs.” Easton set the tray on the side table before picking up the mess that fell to the floor. “You can eat lunch with us.” He stood and held out his arm. Robbie reluctantly took it, needing the extra support. “You should sit on the porch. The fresh air will do you some good. It’s beautiful outside.” Robbie allowed Easton to lead him out of the bedroom.
Reaching out his free arm, Robbie held the railing, taking one stair at a time. Their descent was slow, but eventually they reached the bottom. Robbie paused and took a few deep breaths, staring out the large picture window. The sun was shining bright, and a breeze came through the screen washing over him. Easton was right, the fresh air felt good. Being locked inside the bedroom had been tough, even with visitors.
“Let’s go outside.” Easton gently tugged his arm.
He opened the screen door and Robbie shuffled past Easton, heading toward the swing sitting on the porch. Easing himself down, Robbie got as comfortable as he could against the worn cushions. He closed his eyes, rocking back and forth, as the wind blew through his hair.
“I’m going to get you a sandwich, I’ll be right back,” Easton said right before the screen bounced off the door frame.
The silence stretched until he heard a truck rolling down the long gravel driveway.
Robbie opened his eyes and watched the vehicle come closer. It didn’t take long for him to recognize the driver. Cody was behind the wheel. Their eyes met and held until Cody turned the wheel and headed to the barn, away from the main house. He stared at the back of the beat-up old Chevy, wishing the cowboy would turn around and come back. The brake lights came on, the engine shut off, and Robbie held his breath as Cody climbed out. He kept his head tilted, blocking Robbie’s view of his face with his cowboy hat.
“Fucking asshole,” he breathed out quietly under his breath, his heart deflating rapidly.
A comforting hand touched his shoulder and Robbie looked up at Jackson. “I’m sorry, man.”
“It’s fine.” He made a noise in the back of his throat. “I’m fine,” Robbie told himself, his voice stronger.
He wasn’t trying to convince Jackson, he was trying to make his heart believe.
* * * *
Cody kept his back straight as he strode into the barn.
He waited until he was out of Robbie’s line of sight before he allowed himself to show a reaction. His legs were shaking with each step he took away from the man he cared about. He barely made it to a bale of hay before collapsing. Seeing Robbie affected him physically. It was such a shock to see the man conscious and outside, after the condition he’d been in.
The bright, white bandages still covered part of his face and neck, a reminder that there were stitches holding Robbie’s delicate skin together. Those pieces of gauze didn’t take anything away from his beautiful face. Emotion clogged his throat and Cody wiped his eyes, refusing to let any tears fall. Cody wanted to wrap his arms around Robbie and hold him close, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t look at the man without feeling guilty.
How could he ask for forgiveness when it was his fault? He should’ve been paying attention. He should’ve been doing the work himself.
“You do care about him.” Cody jerked his head up and saw Oliver leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. His face was a mask of indifference as he stared at Cody.
Standing, he straightened his shoulders and cleared his throat. “Of course I care about him.”
“Then what’s your problem?” Oliver arched a brow. “If you really care about him then why didn’t you check on him? Robbie asked about you every day and not once did I hear you ask about him.”
“It’s none of your business.” Cody wasn’t going to explain himself to Robbie’s half brother—a man that he’d only met recently and barely spoken a dozen words to.
“You’re right. It’s none of my business.” He shrugged, pushing himself off the barn wall. Cody thought he might leave, but he started walking toward him. “He’s fine, by the way, just in case you were curious.” Oliver stared at him intently and Cody took an unsteady step back. There was something dangerous about Oliver and Cody wasn’t looking for a fight. “He’ll have some scars, but at least he’s alive, right? Unless you were only attracted to him for his looks, then you wouldn’t be interested and you wouldn’t care.”
“You don’t know me and you don’t know what you’re talking about.” Cody turned on his heel and started to walk away, but Oliver grabbed his arm, jerking him to a stop.
“Why aren’t you by his side? Why didn’t you check in on him? It’s obvious you have feelings for him. The look on your face says it all, so how can you just walk away from him without any explanation?” Oliver bit out, dropping his arm.
“It’s my fault that he got hurt. He could’ve died because of me,” Cody admitted for the first time out loud to another person.
“You hit him with barbed wire?” Oliver asked, and Cody rolled his eyes heavenward. “You purposely let go of the wire so that it would snap back and cut him up?”
“When I think about Robbie—which is every minute of the day—I picture him on the ground covered in blood. He shouldn’t have been stringing fence line with me. He’s not a rancher. He doesn’t have any experience with this type of work. So, yes, it is my fault. And it’s none of your business.”
“It was an accident,” Oliver insisted. “But it doesn’t matter what I think or what anyone else thinks either. You need to figure it out for yourself. If you really care about him, you should at least give him an explanation. He deserves that much.” Oliver didn’t bother waiting for Cody to respond.
Oliver strode out of the barn and disappeared, leaving Cody with his thoughts. Robbie was always on his mind. The man wasn’t ever far away, not really. It may have been an accident, but the responsibility still weighed down heavily on his shoulders.
Chapter 7
Three Days Later
“Ugh.” Robbie put his hands on his hips and arched his back, cracking it in the process.
“You’re working too hard, man.” Mason gripped his shoulder, squeezing slightly. “Don’t overdo it. You don’t want to get yourself injured again.”
“I can’t be stuck inside all day. The work keeps my mind occupied, and it’s not like I injured myself working. I was hit with barbed wire when it snapped.” Robbie didn’t mention Cody.
It didn’t seem to matter how hard or long he worked, Cody was on his mind. He hadn’t seen the cowboy since the brief moment when their eyes met.
“Do you want to come out with us tonight?” Preston asked.
“There are always a few single men hanging out at Marilyn’s. It’s a small bar all the ranchers in the area visit,” Mason added.
“Yeah, thanks, that sounds great. Do you mind if I invite the other guys?” Robbie asked, thinking that Easton, Oliver, and Jared might want to go out and have some fun.
“Of course.” Preston chuckled. “Bring them all.”
“Let’s go home and shower, lover.” Mason wrapped a meaty arm around Preston’s waist. “We can pick you up or meet you there. Marilyn�
��s is just down the road a bit.”
“I’ll meet you there,” Robbie told them.
He watched Mason and Preston walk off together and couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy.
Strolling toward the house, he stomped his new cowboy boots on the mat before walking inside. Voices in the dining room along with the tempting aroma of food called to him. He knew that Cody wouldn’t be sitting at the table, but his heart still filled with hope. Stepping into the room, he was disappointed.
It’s over. You need to move on.
“Mason and Preston invited all of us to Marilyn’s tonight, if anyone wants to go,” Robbie announced as he took a seat.
“I want to go.” Easton smiled widely.
“First round’s on me,” Jared announced.
“Sure, what the hell.” Oliver shrugged.
“I think it’s a great idea. We need to get out and have some fun.” Jackson nodded.
* * * *
After a long day of work, it felt good to leave the ranch in his rear view mirror. He needed some time to blow off steam and was looking forward to having a few beers with his brothers. The five of them hadn’t left the ranch for some fun since arriving. It was time.
“How do you like living on the ranch?” Robbie asked Oliver.
It was just the two of them inside his vehicle. Wyatt was driving the others, leading the way toward the bar.
“It’s different. I’m not used to having so many people around all the time.” Oliver’s answer didn’t surprise him.