by Jillian Dodd
“It was good,” she replies. “I don’t want to be rude, but would you mind if I worked on the way home? My mind is spinning with ideas, and I’d love to get them down on paper.”
“Of course not. I’ll probably sleep the whole way. I’m still tired.” And possibly slightly hungover.
“You’ve been through a lot, Jennifer,” she says with a smile. “Sleep will do you good.”
When we reach cruising altitude, she unfolds a large design table out of the wall, and I watch her sketch out a grand gathering space before I fall asleep.
We land at an executive airport in Kansas City, transfer to an SUV in the parking lot, and get buckled in.
She glances over at me, looking a little nervous. “Is Cade Crawford still your agent?”
“Yeah, why?”
“I didn’t know if you would have heard anything through him. His brother, Carter, is Danny’s agent. Since you mentioned Danny’s wife when I texted you—”
“Is she going to hate me? Is she going to be mad that you invited me?” I have a moment of panic. “Ohmigosh, does she know about me and Danny?”
“To my knowledge, Danny never told her about you. Or that he stopped talking to you and why. You would think something like that would make a woman feel good about her marriage.”
“But not her?”
“No.”
“So, do we have a story? Like, how do you and I know each other if I’m not supposed to know Danny?”
“We’re old friends,” Jadyn says simply.
“But isn’t she going to want to know how we met?”
“If she does, I’ll tell her the truth. That we met at a Nebraska game a long time ago. When I was in California for my meeting, we got back in touch.”
“Okay. Why do I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me? Even if it’s bad, tell me. I’d rather know now.”
“Danny and Lori are getting a divorce. They’ve managed to keep it out of the press. Their attorneys won’t officially file until they’ve signed the financial and custodial agreements, which takes place next week. I think Danny should be the one to tell you the rest though. It’s not really my place.”
“Are you freaking kidding me?” I yell out. My heart soars as a grin spreads across my face.
“You should see your smile.” Jadyn laughs.
“I’m sorry. I know it’s horrible of me, but it makes me happy. What happened?”
“While I’m really not all that surprised about them getting a divorce, I just never in a million years imagined that she would be the one to want it. She enjoys spending his money way too much.”
“She wanted a divorce?” My hand flies up to my chest. “What’s wrong with her? Danny’s freaking perfection!” I narrow my eyes at her, realizing for the first time that the Danny Diamond I fell for years ago might be very different now. “Wait, did Danny turn into a jerk? Was he cheating on her? Does he have an addiction to women? Or drugs? Or alcohol?”
“Danny is and has always been a good man. He’s never cheated, and he has no addictions—other than maybe working out. The rest of it, you need to hear from him. Mostly because we have differing opinions about it.”
“But you and Danny are still best friends?”
“Of course we are. And we still live next door to each other. Something Lori hates. Thank goodness he never gave in on moving away. Speaking of which,” she says, making a turn, “this is our neighborhood. Our houses are on a lake, which is really fun. When you look out back, you sort of feel like you’re on vacation.”
I take in the large homes. The bicycles in the front yards. Women pushing strollers down the sidewalks. I notice Jadyn waves at everyone we pass. The neighborhood is pretty with lots of trees, lush green lawns, and streets that seem to wind endlessly.
After numerous turns, she pulls into the driveway of a sprawling home with a beautiful, welcoming front porch that’s all decked out for Halloween. I glance at the houses on each side, wondering which one is Danny’s. Wondering if he’s home. Or if I might catch a glimpse of him.
Jadyn hits the remote, causing the garage door to open. Just as we’re pulling in, a woman comes out of the house next door. I will admit that I might have checked out Danny’s wife online. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a photo of her, so I’m not sure if this is her or not, and it causes my mind to fill with another million questions.
Are they still living together until the divorce is final? is the first that comes to mind.
Jadyn stops, rolls down her window, and says, “Hey, Kyla. How’s your little one feeling?”
Kyla smiles and tells her it wasn’t an ear infection, just teething, and then we pull into the garage, and she shuts the door behind us.
We’re stepping into a large laundry/mudroom when Jadyn’s phone beeps.
“Shoot. I have to go pick up my younger kids from school. Phillip’s meeting is running late. Do you want to come with me?” She pauses just long enough to set her bags down. “On second thought, stay here, and make yourself at home. Enjoy the peace while you can.”
She leads me into an expansive kitchen with gray cabinetry, brass pulls, stainless appliances, and gleaming white marble countertops. She points to the other side of the room where next to a long dining table are more cabinets featuring a buffet and two under-counter beverage refrigerators filled with an assortment of drinks.
“Help yourself to a drink and a snack. I’ll be ten minutes, tops.”
She glances at the time again and then rushes out of the house.
I stand in the kitchen and look around. Their house is … different. A lot different than the tract home I grew up in and a lot different from the modern Malibu beach house I’ve been living in. This house is, in one word, comfortable. But it’s also quite beautiful. Like something you’d see in a magazine from a design standpoint but still casual. On the buffet, there is a pedestal filled with cupcakes, covered with a domed glass. Two apothecary jars flank it, one loaded with pretzels and the other with a homemade snack mix. A wire bowl is filled with apples.
But it’s the table that catches my eye. It’s modern in style, yet the wood is worn and its surface marred. Probably all scratched up from having four kids, but as I glide my hand across it, I realize they aren’t scratches. Numerous names are carved into the table. Part of me wonders why someone would purposefully do this to their table, but as I read all the names, I’m overcome with emotion. These are all their friends. Hundreds of them. The kind of friends who get together once a month. Whose kids are friends. People who care about each other. I don’t have many people like that in my life. Over the years, a combination of Troy’s drinking and his quest for fame and fortune has gotten in the way. If I had a table like this, there would only be a handful of names on it. I’ve missed out on so many friendships.
I walk toward the windows and take in the view of the lake. There’s a library off to the left. While most of the home features a wide-open floor plan, this bookcase-filled room is sectioned off and cozy. I take a seat in a comfy chair, curl my legs up, and stare out at the lake.
I’m completely lost in thought when the front door opens. I have a moment of panic as I hear heavy footsteps instead of the sound of children coming home from school. Did someone just break in? My eyes sweep the area, looking for a weapon and settling on a heavy amethyst bookend.
With the bookend in my palm, I tiptoe toward the kitchen. A shirtless man is standing in front of the refrigerator, drinking milk straight out of the jug. Sweat shimmers across his muscular back. Is he some crack addict who breaks into houses and steals milk? No, a crack addict wouldn’t be built like that. Clearly, milk does a body good.
“What do you think you’re doing?” I yell out.
The guy turns at the sound of my voice. When he sees me, his eyes bug out, and he drops the milk.
Oh. My. God. It’s him. Danny Diamond in the flesh.
And holy mother-effing hell.
The glass bottle bounces off the floor w
ithout breaking, but milk splashes everywhere.
I rush toward him to help clean it up.
But Danny doesn’t move. He’s frozen, rooted in his spot, milk on the floor and splattered on the cabinets all around him. He’s drinking in the sight of me, like he was drinking the milk earlier, with force. His eyes feel like a rough caress. I look down at the workout clothes I’m wearing, wanting only comfortable traveling garments in my hungover state this morning. I remember washing my face and dabbing on some concealer and mascara. I thought I would get here, freshen up, and change before he ever saw me. This is not how I wanted to look when I met Danny Diamond again. Especially since he’s still staring at me.
I find my voice. “Hey.”
After all the clever and witty things I’d planned to say if I ever saw him again, all I could manage to blurt out was, Hey.
Great first impression, Jenn.
“Hey is for horses,” Danny says back, laughing.
Has he gone mad? Did the divorce push him over the edge?
I give him a once-over. He looks a little older, a few soft crinkles around his eyes, but that is the only soft thing I can observe. Everything else is toned, hardened muscle. I remember when we stripped down to our underwear and ran into the ocean in the moonlight. He was just a rookie quarterback then. A hotshot. Still boyish. Not yet the man standing in front of me. The same muscles are there, the same level of fitness, but he looks fuller, more solid. Or maybe it’s because I’m at a point in my life where I feel so weak.
We simultaneously move toward each other, drawn together, until we’re mere inches apart. Both of us basking in the fact that we are in the same room after all these years. Danny’s eyes move to my mouth, and in that moment, I think he might kiss me.
The front door bursts open, and children come bounding in. Backpacks hit the floor. The air fills with laughter. A teen girl and two boys stop in their tracks upon seeing us.
“You’d better clean that up before Mom gets home,” the tallest boy, who I recognize as Chase, states.
“I’d let Angel lick it all up!” the other boy says.
Danny’s gaze breaks, leaving me feeling cold. “That’s a darn good idea, Damon,” he says, moving to rustle his son’s hair. “Chase, go get her. She is probably asleep in your mom’s room and didn’t hear us come in.”
“Who are you?” the girl asks me.
It doesn’t take much to know that this is Danny’s daughter. They share the same brilliant blue eyes and dirty-blonde hair.
“I, uh—” I stutter because all that comes to mind is, I’m the woman who wants to take your father in the nearest bedroom and—
“This is Jennifer Edwards,” Danny says to her.
“Like the movie star?” she asks.
“She is the movie star,” Danny replies.
The girl scrutinizes me.
“I don’t have any makeup on,” I say in my defense.
“Where’s Auntie Jay?” she asks, seemingly not convinced of who I am.
“She went to pick up, um, some kids. Someone else was supposed to, but she had to at the last minute,” I offer as an older yellow Labrador pads slowly into the room, wags her tail at the kids, and then eagerly licks up the milk.
Danny
I’m standing in Jadyn’s kitchen, three of our combined six children clamoring about with the dog licking milk off my shoes, and staring at the woman who was probably the love of my life.
This isn’t exactly how I expected things to go down if I were ever lucky enough to see her again.
“Why don’t you guys grab some cookies, go downstairs, and work on your homework before we have to leave for the game?” I suggest to the kids.
“I can’t eat cookies, Dad,” Devaney says. “I’m in high school. I have to look hot.”
“You’re fourteen. You shouldn’t worry about that.”
“Whatever,” she says, grabbing an apple from the island and going downstairs to the ultimate kid zone. A place to play, relax, and study. I’m redoing my house so that it’s more kid-friendly, hoping to wipe the memories of being forced to behave like little adults by my soon-to-be ex from the kids’ minds.
“There are wipes under the sink you can use,” Damon says as he grabs a paper plate from the buffet and piles it high with snacks.
I can’t get him to lift a finger at home, but at the Mackenzie house, kids are told how to behave if they want to hang out here. And they all follow the rules because they want to be here.
“If it’s sticky, Auntie Jay will not be happy.”
I slip off my shoes and gesture to Jennifer that I’ll be right back. I step over the sticky mess, pick up the dog, and carry her downstairs, knowing, in her advanced age, she doesn’t like to be separated from Chase.
As I make my way back up the stairs, I wonder if I’m dreaming. If I’ll get back to the kitchen and realize that seeing Jennifer was some exercise-induced hallucination.
How could she possibly be here? Why is she here?
It’s been years. I know, not long after I cut off communication with her, she started dating a drummer. I know they’ve never had children even though the tabloids always proclaimed she had a baby bump. I’ve seen photos of her on magazine covers, seen every movie she ever made, and dreamed of her many times over the years.
But I never imagined she’d be here.
“Why are you here?” I blurt out the second I get to the top of the stairs.
But she’s gone.
Am I losing it? Was the milk bad?
“Because Jadyn invited me,” a voice says from behind the island.
I take a few steps forward and see her down on her knees, antibacterial wipes in hand, cleaning up the floor.
“You didn’t have to do that.” I pull a wipe out of the plastic container. “I was coming back to clean it. I’m sorry. I was surprised to see you here. Speaking of that, why are you here?”
“You might be the only person in the world who doesn’t know.” She scrubs the floor with more vigor.
“Know what?”
“About Troy.” When she looks up at me, her eyes fill with tears.
“Is he dead?” I ask, assuming the worst as I drop onto my knees next to her.
“What? No? He, um—there are photos. He and some girls. In bed. A wild night after a gig in Amsterdam. The paparazzi have been relentless. They all want a statement from me. What do they think I’m going to say? My boyfriend cheated on me, and it hurts like hell. Yes, I was shocked. No, I had no idea.”
“My wife had an affair for a year,” I quickly confess. “I had no idea. She told me right before we were supposed to leave on a trip to celebrate our fifteenth anniversary. I realized later the reason she waited until then was because it meant she would get more, according to the prenup.”
“Were you happy?”
“I thought we were.”
“Did you ever think about me?” she asks as our gazes lock.
“Yes, often.”
“I was there when you won your first Super Bowl. I had a pass to go out on the field. My first reaction was to run down there to congratulate you, but your wife was there, and you were holding your little girl when you received the MVP Award. I understood the joy on your face. It wasn’t just because you’d won. It was also the way your little girl held on to you. She smiled and kissed your cheek. Troy is a big fan of yours. He had no idea we’d ever met. I pretended to be sick for the next championship you won. I just couldn’t bear to go. It was one thing to watch you on TV, another to be there in person. I’ve even been invited to the ESPYs numerous times over the years. I always turn it down.”
“Why?”
“Because I knew, the next time we were together, I wouldn’t be so moral.”
I gulp, knowing that was the same reason I couldn’t be just her friend. She’s so beautiful—long blonde hair, big blue eyes, killer body. I take in her full, lush lips, wanting nothing more than to kiss them—screw that, I want to take her by the hair, drag her to my hous
e, throw her on the bed, and—
The garage door bursts open. Crusher, Jadyn’s youngest, comes barreling into the kitchen, closely followed by Jadyn and her other two children.
“Danny!” Jadyn says, her eyes widening with surprise when she spots me on the floor. “Um, I was going to tell you about Jennifer being here before—shit.”
“Shit, shit, shit,” Madden yells out.
“The kids are downstairs and have cookies,” I tell her son.
“Yes,” Jadyn agrees. “All of you, go down there, have a snack, and get your homework done if you want to go to the game tonight.”
They grab juice boxes, snacks, and their backpacks and are off to the basement. The garage door opens again, and Phillip, who must not see me and Jennifer on the floor, grabs his wife and pulls her in for a deep kiss.
“Sorry I’m late. I promise to make it up to you later,” he suggests, his hand moving to caress her backside while his lips slide down her neck. “I missed you.”
I stand up and hold my hand out for Jennifer, who takes it.
“You playing hide-and-seek with the kids?” he asks when he sees me, but he stops speaking when Jennifer follows me up. “Um, Jadyn?” he says, turning toward his wife and narrowing his eyes at her but not appearing as surprised as he should be.
I want to contemplate that, but Jennifer’s hand is in mine, and it makes my heart pound like I just ran fifty yards for a touchdown.
“I know. Okay,” Jadyn says to Phillip. “But I had to offer. And I was shocked and thrilled when she took me up on it. We literally just walked in the door from the airport when I had to leave her here because you bailed on picking up the kids.” She turns to me and Jennifer. “I’m sorry. I certainly didn’t expect you to see each other after all this time when Danny is … just all sweaty.”
Jennifer slides her hand out of mine, leaving it feeling empty. Lonely. Incomplete.
“I’m not that sweaty,” I counter, but I know I am.
Jennifer is probably repulsed.
“I told you, playing matchmaker is like playing with matches. You’ll get burned,” Phillip says sternly to his wife.