by DiAnn Mills
A twist of fear settled upon her, and she shuddered. She glanced about the upper hallway from the picture of two children posed in an oversized chair to the layer of dust on the floor. Already she had become involved. What if the Rainers learned the truth?
This is nonsense. Picking up her skirts, Casey stepped to the stairway. I’ve agreed to my own death. Except something about helping others sounded good. Morgan might even approve. She shook her head. Would he ever stop plaguing her thoughts?
“I’ll do my best with the position you’ve offered, providing the folks in your church think it’s all right,” she said to Reverend Rainer. “Be certain of this: If you ever have any questions about me, I’ll answer them honestly.”
“Fine, Miss Flanagan. I think I’ll pay a visit to a couple of my deacons this evening to see about you getting started right away.”
The walk back to the boardinghouse brought a wagonload of hope. No one would suspect a woman living at the parsonage and tending to the reverend’s wife to be an outlaw. Maybe her reading the Bible had brought good luck.
Back at the boardinghouse, the smell of food led her into the dining room. She slipped into a chair near the corner of the room and wondered how long it would take before she felt comfortable among decent folks. Within moments, the owner brought her a plate piled high with roast beef, potatoes, green beans, and corn bread. The sight of it nearly made her dizzy, and the food seemed to melt in her mouth. She forced herself to eat slowly and use the manners she’d seen from Maude. At that thought, she smiled. Soon she’d write them of her good fortune.
Midway through her meal, the sheriff walked in. The corn bread seemed to stick in her throat. She coughed, then reached for a glass of water. The only way out of the dining room was right past him. She’d made enough foolish moves today without one more. He seated himself on the other side of the room at a long table with some other folks. Relief flooded through her. Once he started to talk with the others, she’d leave.
The moment the owner set his food in front of him, the sheriff stood and walked her way. He carried his hat, and his black mustache twitched.
“Ma’am,” he said, “I’m Sheriff Kahler, and I want to welcome you to Kahlerville.”
“Thank you.”
“Do you have people here?”
“No, sir.”
“Well, if you need anything, just stop by my office.”
“I’ll do that very thing. Thank you again.”
He turned around, took one step, then faced her. “Have you ever been to Kentucky?”
“No, sir.” And she hadn’t.
“You look powerful familiar. I thought I might have remembered you from home.”
Trapped. If she left Kahlerville now, the sheriff would figure out where he’d seen her face and have a posse hot on her trail. She didn’t know this part of the country well enough to risk it. She’d have to stay, at least for a little while.
For the first time, an idea began to take form.
Chapter 12
“So you’re heading out?” the preacher said to Morgan.
“It’s time. If I’m serious about starting over, then I need to make a few amends, beginning with my family.”
“You’ll do fine.”
“Thanks to you and the Lord. Forgiving Jenkins is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” Morgan picked up his hat. “But I sure feel better.”
“And what about Casey?”
“I have to find her. If the law gets her first, I can represent her. I used to be a good lawyer. But if Jenkins does, well . . .”
“God has a plan for both of you, and I’ll be praying. Thanks for all you’ve done here. I’ll miss you.” The tall, lanky preacher grinned. He still looked more like a cowhand than a man of God.
Morgan stepped out into the warm morning. He shook hands with the preacher, a man who would never be forgotten.
*****
The first few nights at the parsonage, Casey fell into bed bone-tired. She’d always been accustomed to hard work and little sleep, but not the ache that settled in her heart as she cared for Sarah Rainer. By the third day, Casey admitted the necessity to schedule household chores around nursing. After a week, she established a routine, and her duties became easier. Not once did she regret the work. Still, she figured she’d signed her death warrant when she learned Sheriff Kahler was a deacon.
A strange, almost strangling hold kept her at the parsonage. She tried to reason why she simply didn’t saddle up Stampede and leave Kahlerville. Perhaps it was the sense of purpose she’d found, more powerful than the fear of dying.
As the reverend had said, Sarah didn’t complain even when the slightest movement caused her to wince. Sarah’s wishes to stay neat and clean invited intense pain, but she wouldn’t hear of anything else.
“I can bathe you later,” Casey said on Sunday morning after Sarah had spent a miserable night. “I’m sure you’ll feel better after resting.”
The lines deepened in the woman’s face, and her eyes clearly told of the suffering. She fought for every breath and displayed more courage than Casey had ever seen from hardened outlaws.
“No, please do it now. It’s—it’s important to me.” Sarah closed her eyes. “Today is the Lord’s day, and I want to go to church.”
“Oh, Sarah, are you sure?” A frown tugged at Casey’s lips. “You know how hard the afternoons are for you.”
“Afterward doesn’t matter. John and I have a commitment to God and our flock. Why, the Petersons have a new baby, and I’m sure they’ll bring her this morning. They named her Sarah, after me. And we want to show our congregation what a blessing you are. Now how could I stay home?”
“But—” Casey thought she’d met her match in stubbornness.
The woman shook her head. “And today will be the first Sunday Mrs. Heilman will be there without her husband. God rest his soul. So tell me, sweet girl, how can I not go?”
Casey realized she’d been defeated. “I understand, but I don’t agree.”
Sarah’s smile brightened. “If we hurry, John can carry me inside before the others arrive. I hate all the fuss made over me. Besides, I want him to go over the last part of today’s sermon. His message seemed to lack something when I heard it yesterday.”
Casey gingerly bathed and dressed her. She understood the price the dear woman paid for attending church.
The Andrews family was among the early arrivals that morning. Casey had met Jocelyn and her daughter, Bonnie, and her son Grant the first day she lived at the parsonage. Something about the son triggered a memory, but she’d tossed the thought aside.
This week’s sermon spoke of love and forgiveness as demonstrated in Jesus’ story about the prodigal son. Sarah had been concerned about the part where the son wanted to come home. According to her, a family in the church had a similar problem, and she wanted to make sure the sermon included both the love and the forgiving nature of God.
Reverend Rainer talked about God’s grace and mercy. Every word seemed to linger in Casey’s heart and hold her spellbound until the next one was spoken. What she’d read in the Bible now had clearer meaning. Even the words to the songs touched her.
When the sermon ended, Reverend Rainer stepped away from the pulpit and made his way closer to the people. “The Bible says that Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. Through Him we have eternal life in heaven. If you have not thanked Jesus for dying on the cross for you or asked Him to forgive you of your sins and to live in your heart forever, now is the time. Please, let us all bow our heads and pray. For those of you who have already chosen the precious gift of life, pray for those here who may not know Him. If you want the Lord in your life, now is the time to step forward and make that decision.”
Casey felt the tears splash over her cheeks. She was the prodigal, and she desperately wanted to be with the perfect Father. Now she understood, and in the quiet of her heart, she reached out to Jesus. But Reverend Rainer had instructed folks to step forward, and no one vent
ured in that direction.
Her insides twisted. Sheriff Kahler stood beside the reverend. His reputation for keeping Kahlerville clean of outlaws exploded across her mind. Did she save her skin or save her soul?
She stood on shaky legs and made her way from the second pew up to Reverend Rainer. With her gaze fixed on the reverend, she took a deep breath. “I’d like to give my life to Jesus.”
He smiled and took her hand. The prayer was short, her breathing ragged, but she’d made the decision of a lifetime. No matter what the future held, she no longer faced it alone. The derringer in her pocket must be put to rest with the Colt and Winchester under her bed. Later, she’d put together the right words to tell the Reverend and Sarah about her past. Deceit had to vanish from her life. In the meantime, she’d pray for Morgan and Tim. Both needed the hand of God.
Monday morning dawned brighter than Casey could ever remember. She set Sarah’s breakfast of oatmeal sweetened with apple butter in front of the woman. “I feel so good today.”
“That’s because you’re thinking of the fine time we’ll have in heaven.”
Casey hadn’t considered that aspect. Yet it sounded wonderful. “I wanted to be a part of God’s family, but I didn’t know what it meant until I heard the reverend yesterday.”
“Bend down here and let me give you a hug,” Sarah said.
Hearing the reverend and Sarah praise her about the decision to follow God made life seem a little richer. But dealing with the possibility of the sheriff recognizing her was another matter altogether.
*****
Morgan watched his mother pace the kitchen floor. Light brown wisps had slipped from her pinned-up hair and now framed her face.
“You don’t think it’s a bad idea?” she said.
He laughed. “No. I think it’s wonderful. You should have bought the bull and told me about it later.”
His slender mother ceased her pacing and grabbed the back of an empty chair. “I want to develop our own line of beef from the best of stock. Bringing that bull from South Carolina is a start.”
He contemplated the risk. Investing a large amount of money in one animal made him a bit anxious, too, but he refused to dampen his mother’s spirit. “Look at the figures. We have the money, and beef prices keep going up.” He pointed to the ledger. “Looks like you’ve spent a lot of time keeping that straight. I’m more than pleased.”
“Your brother does the bookkeeping now and oversees the ranch. He works alongside the others, then tends to the books after dark.”
“He’s too young for all that responsibility.”
She said nothing but moved around to sit in the chair beside him. “Don’t criticize your brother. He’s smart and can work like a man twice his age. Remember what you did at seventeen?”
Guilt caused his face to grow warm. Grant might still be young, but he did more than Morgan in taking care of the family. “I should speak to him.”
“Morgan.” Mama’s voice raised a notch.
“I mean to let him know he’s doing a fine job.”
“Are you sure? I won’t have you undermining him.”
Morgan leaned back in his chair and tipped on the back legs. “I’m doing exactly what I promised myself I wouldn’t do. When I left, he was thirteen years old, and his voice had barely started to crack. Now he’s grown, and I’m still treating him like a kid.”
“I agree.”
He offered a faint smile. “No wonder he takes off when I show up. Can’t say I blame him.” He hesitated, trying to figure out the best way to apologize. “Mama, I made my peace with God. I’m finished chasing after Jenkins. Time I went back to living.”
She touched his cheek. A callus on her finger reminded him of the hard work required to run the ranch while he’d chased the country looking for an outlaw. “What brought this about?” she said.
“A woman and a meetin’ with my Maker.”
“Both are good things.” She smiled and withdrew her hand from his face.
“I intend to apologize to Bonnie and Grant and hope they see a change.”
“Oh, Morgan. Our prayers are answered.” She dabbed at her eyes with the corner of her apron. “Then you’re home to stay? No more leaving in the middle of the night and causing us to wonder if you’re dead or alive?”
He winced. “You never hold back the words when I need a scolding.”
“That’s what a mother’s for.” She eased into the chair. “Tell me more, Morgan.”
“I need to find this woman. I’m not sure where she is, but I’ll do my searching from here as much as I can. I’d like a couple of weeks to make inquiries. Then I’ll be back.”
Mama nodded. “You must love her.”
“I think I do. Felt something right from the start, but I can’t rightly say why. I know God put her in my life for a reason, but it’s been a hard lesson. I want to bring her back here, if she’ll have me.”
“Any woman would be honored to have you.”
“Until she got wind of my temper.” He sighed. “I’m a stubborn fool.” He stood and gazed out at the green hills where cattle and horses grazed. He’d done enough wallowing in self-pity. “Tell me what’s going on. How’s Bonnie?”
“Good. Growing up some. Has more to go. We’ve spoiled her, and I’m afraid she’s not strong enough to grab hold of this rough country.”
Thoughts of his small, frail sister danced across his mind. “She can’t get through life by relying on her pretty face.”
“I agree. She’s an Andrews, and that means she has to be strong.”
“How’s Reverend Rainer’s wife?”
“She keeps getting worse. There for a while, the reverend tried to do it all. Even with women from church bringing food and cleaning now and then, it wasn’t enough. He loves Sarah dearly, and her care is what’s important.”
“Sounds like he needs help.”
“And that very thing has happened. He’s hired a young woman to live there and tend to Sarah and the house.”
Morgan considered the matter. “A relative?”
“No. She’s new to town. Just showed up one day. Some of the folks at church complained that he hadn’t done right, but I told them to either move into the parsonage and take care of things or hush. She’s a fine young woman, and from what I’ve seen, she dotes on Sarah just like the reverend does. When I visited this week, the house was spotless, and Sarah was happy.”
Morgan listened to his mother’s every word. In times past he would only half-listen—another one of his faults. “When I get back, I’ll pay the Rainers a call.”
“I’m heading over there in the morning. Want to join me?”
“Monday morning. I guess I could before moving on. Probably wouldn’t hurt for me to visit with the reverend. I owe him an apology for all the times I threw God back at him.”
“Good.” She patted his hand. “He had good sermons today. I wish you’d been here in time to go with us. By the way, Son,” she said, her voice softening, “the wildness is gone from your eyes.”
“Thanks, Mama. God has a lot of work to do with me—my temper, my pride, the past.”
“He has plenty of work to do in all of us. I’ll continue to pray for you and your friend.”
“Pray she’ll be surrounded by those who’ll love her.” Casey’s face floated through his mind, along with a stab of fear. “And keep her safe.”
*****
Casey bustled about the kitchen to make sure everything was in order for guests. One of the church members, Jocelyn Andrews, planned to visit Sarah midmorning.
“You should become acquainted with Jocelyn’s daughter, Bonnie,” Sarah had said earlier. “She’s about your age.”
Casey remembered the petite blond with the dimpled smile, but making friends invited trouble. “I really don’t have time for socializing. You’re my friend.”
“Nonsense. Young women need each other.”
“Yes, ma’am.” But I can’t, Sarah. I can’t allow anyone to know who I am
, and I don’t want to put anyone in danger. The thought suddenly struck her that Jenkins wouldn’t hesitate to harm the reverend or Sarah.
“I know you’re shy, and I’m sorry,” Sarah said. “Are you troubled?”
Casey fussed with her quilt. “You are what’s important to me.”
Promptly at ten o’clock, a rap sounded at the door. Guests had stopped by before but none with a potential friend. The thought filled her with dread. Casey took a deep breath and smoothed a green flowered dress that one of the deacon’s wives had given her. Someday soon she must learn to bake. Life on the trail hadn’t taught her those things, and on occasions such as this, she wanted to have something to serve the Rainers’ friends.
“I’ll greet the guests,” Reverend Rainer said, but they met each other at the front door.
“Go ahead.” Casey laughed.
The reverend opened the door. “Mornin’, Jocelyn. Good to see you, Bonnie. Sarah is so looking forward to your visit.” He paused. “Do I see an old friend?”
Bonnie giggled, a sweet laughter that dripped with honey. The sound reminded Casey of innocence. “Yes, Reverend.”
The reverend stepped out onto the porch, then down the steps. “Son, you have just made this day a little better.”
“It’s been a long time.”
Casey’s gaze flew beyond Jocelyn and Bonnie. She shivered. Heat flooded her face.
“Sarah and I sure have missed you.”
“Well, I couldn’t let a visit go by without seeing the both of you.”
Casey’s stomach curdled. This couldn’t possibly be happening. Then she saw his face.
Chapter 13
Casey’s heart pounded until it ached, and the ability to speak escaped her lips. Finally she took a deep breath. She’d let Morgan set the tone between them, and she’d respond accordingly. The truth of her own emotions nearly staggered her. She had allowed this man to steal her heart.
“My, we’re forgetting our manners,” Jocelyn said. “Shawne, this is my son Morgan. He came in yesterday afternoon and plans to leave tomorrow, but not without a visit to the reverend and Sarah. “Morgan, this is Miss Shawne Flanagan. She takes care of Sarah.”