by Cindy Kirk
He leaned back enough that she glimpsed his boyish grin. “You were saying?”
“I have no idea.” None. No idea in the world what she’d been about to say. She’d be hard-pressed to even remember her own name right now.
He pressed his mouth to the spot on her temple her fingers reserved for times of stress, and he prayed. Beautiful words, God’s bountiful answer and the care behind their comfort seamed the shards of her soul. She relished the nearness.
His eyes were closed, face serene. Dimples deepened. Smile huge.
Lord, I think I love this man. Love that he takes pleasure in me and my well-being.
Emerald eyes opened on a face so tender and bright, she couldn’t look away. And still . . . no recollection of her name. Sort of.
“Meadow . . .”
“That’s it.”
“What?” he murmured.
“My name.”
“Your name. Your name should not be Meadow Larson.”
“No?”
“No. It should be Meadow McGrath.”
His words slammed her into a wall of reality. He’d said Meadow McGrath.
They’d been back in one another’s lives for two weeks. No way could his feelings progress so far in so little time. Right? Seriously, no. That was crazy.
Yet didn’t her soul feel the same?
She’d made herself too vulnerable, and now her heart hovered over a vat of trouble.
Just like before.
And just like before, he could burn it.
Failing to fend off the fear and confusion, she scuttled away.
He reached, tugging her hand. “Meadow, wait.”
She shook her head. Pondered protest. But what could she say? She’d wanted that kiss as much as he had. To pretend otherwise would dishonor him and make her dishonest.
His jaw firmed. “Don’t dare let yourself regret or second-guess this.”
“What did you expect me to do, enjoy it?”
He smiled broadly. “That’s the general idea.”
“Well . . .”
His eyebrow arched. He folded bulky arms across his broad chest in a steady, daring challenge. Could she really lie and say she hadn’t enjoyed it?
“Well?” Colin pressed.
“You’re lucky you kiss way, way better than you cook.” She tugged his sleeve. “Come on. We have a reception to set up for and cater in two hours, and the venue is ten minutes of congested traffic away.”
“Heard the wedding reception was a hit,” Del said the next morning when Colin arrived at the hospital with breakfast and intent to visit. She’d tolerated solid food for two days.
“Went well considering I was there and you weren’t.”
She chuckled. “I’m sure you did fine. How’re other things coming along?”
He unfolded his breakfast biscuit packaging since Del scolded him yesterday for not eating with her. “Roof and ceiling’s fixed but trim’s on hold. Lumber yard owner’s on vacation.”
Del chewed her biscuit with ham slowly, hoping her doctor wouldn’t find out what she was eating. “I meant the other renovation.”
Hand paused midway to his mouth, Colin shrugged.
One good thing was that, while praying on his morning run, God had granted peaceful assurance that Colin wasn’t mismanaging his motives.
“How’d you know?”
“What, that you’re falling in love with her? Colin, come on. Anyone can see how much you care about her by the way you talk about her. She talks nonstop about you too.”
They were silent as they finished their biscuits, and then Colin tossed their wrappers in the trash can. “Define ‘talk,’ ” he finally said. His confidence that Meadow reciprocated his feelings was shaky.
“Good things. Mostly,” Del teased.
“I’m crazy about her. So that leads to my next question. Will you help me plan a surprise birthday party for her?”
Del clapped. “Fantastic idea! I’m glad to help.”
“Sure you feel up to it?”
“Are you kidding me? Blowing Meadow’s mind is just what the doctor ordered.”
“You know how to reach her siblings? I guess they are staying with Flora.”
“Yes. I’ll invite them for you, if you want.”
“I appreciate the offer, but contacting them is something I need to do.” For reasons beyond a birthday party. He needed to personally apologize to each of them for his part in their sister’s pain and malformed identity.
A knock sounded, and then the doctor entered. “Ready to skedaddle?”
Del flipped her covers back. “Yes, and I have a chauffeur right here. Colin, you got time to drive me home?”
“Absolutely. I just have to pick up Meadow’s brother at the airport later today.”
“Lake? The big, muscle-bound Coast Guard captain?”
“Yep. That would be the one.”
She grimaced. “Painful.”
“Yeah.”
An urgent text came in from his dad’s secretary. A complaint with threats of litigation for a job his dad had allegedly botched. Worse, it said a very influential customer. He texted her back to ask who, then waited for the answering text while nurses provided discharge instructions to Del.
She flagged her doctor down as he passed by her room. “Don’t forget to gimme all my pieces and parts, Doc.”
The doctor handed Del a container of gray rocks. “I forgot. Your royal gems, madam.”
Colin would laugh if he could. Only Del would want her own gallstones. He was too troubled by the new text to let humor seep in. Colin grew wearier when he recognized the address on the text.
The mayor’s mansion. Blythe’s house. Did she still live there? Colin hoped not.
He really could stand to go the rest of his life without seeing her again.
After settling Del in at her home, Colin checked when he had to be at the airport against the current time. Plenty of margin. He drove to Mayor Matthews’s mansion.
He pulled in the circle drive and got out of his truck. Took the steps two at a time and had raised a fist to knock when the door swung open.
Blythe stood on the other side of the doorway. “Colin! Wondered when you’d stop by.” She launched into his arms. He caught her simply to keep from landing in the yard. He set her down so quickly she almost landed on her caboose.
He ignored her pout. “I came to talk to your father. He home?”
“No, the golf course. Can you run me to town, darling? It’s urgent and my car is in the shop.”
Colin gritted his teeth at the endearment, but she said it was an emergency. Town was on the way to the airport, so he nodded curtly to his truck. “Get in.”
“Where to?” he cut through her incessant self-centered chatter two miles later to ask.
“Oh, the mall. Next stoplight.”
His jaw clenched. “Really, Blythe? You have an emergency at the mall?”
She raised her pinky. “Yes! Broke a nail, and I’m attending an engagement party Thursday.”
Colin gripped the steering wheel tighter. “Thursday . . . evening . . . next week?”
“Yeah, my cousin’s, on my mother’s side. Father’s hosting an after party at their home. You should come so we can catch up.” He felt like the proverbial chalkboard as she raked her fingernail up his arm, and it made him no less squeamish. “Really catch up.”
He jerked his arm away and ignored both Blythe’s comeon and her famous pout. Colin’s uneasy feeling about Thursday’s catering event went from bad to worse.
What were the chances the two gigs were one in the same?
His gut churned with a sick feeling, thinking that Blythe could be there.
And so would Meadow.
And possibly some people who’d taken it upon themselves to torment her.
His friends. Former friends.
Would Meadow believe they were no longer his friends? His biggest fear with it was that she’d revert in her progress of trusting him and slam all her walls b
ack up like an impenetrable concrete barrier between them.
Lord, protect Meadow and the special bond you’re building between us.
He may never get a chance like this again in his lifetime. He was bound and determined to use it to prove to her once and for all where his loyalties lay.
With her.
Not with his old girlfriend, nor his old friends, and certainly not with his old patterns.
“Meadow, don’t read into it.” Flora grabbed the dash. “And stop peeling out!”
Meadow’s hands trembled on the steering wheel. She saw red, and it had nothing to do with the Macy’s sign she swerved around to exit Havenbrook Mall. “She was in his truck. They seemed too comfortable. There’s no way this is the first time.”
Silence ruled the ride until they arrived at the pole barn. Flora said, “There has to be a reasonable explanation.”
Meadow let them in and set her new serving utensils by the sink to be washed. Was Colin dating Blythe? It seemed too ridiculous to ponder.
But he’d duped her before. “I’ve been such a fool to—” She bit her tongue.
Flora’s wedding was a week away. She didn’t need the stress of Meadow’s emotional breakdown. She never should’ve trusted her heart to Colin. Her emotions felt grated.
Her mind was going berserk with confusion. Why was he with Blythe when he’d told Meadow he didn’t want to see her? What had Meadow missed?
His lies?
Was this some big elaborate joke they were all playing on her, like in high school?
Trust Colin.
The thought ushered unbidden. Then again. Stronger.
Trust him. Trust me.
The fear that she may not have the courage to do that caused her soul to sink right back in that bitter lake.
“Meadow, will you be okay?” Flora whispered.
Meadow donned a mask of strength she didn’t feel and fibbed with all her heart. “Of course. I’m always okay.”
You’re going to be okay.
The seemingly failed words hit like a slap in the face. She fought tears.
Lord, I know I need to trust you, but seeing her in his truck left me feeling miles away from okay. Colin said feelings lie. Maybe eyes do too. Please show me what to believe.
Two hours later, Flora brought up the subject again. Meadow was still fuming.
“I keep going over this in my head, and I just can’t see him with her.” Flora affixed gold trim on purple banquet table draping for her food riser displays.
“You saw what I saw.” Meadow ripped a crooked thread out and had to start again.
“Ladies?”
Colin.
As he strode in, he assured them Lake had been picked up and safely deposited at Flora’s place, but neither sister spoke, moved, breathed, or blinked.
He set gorgeous cherry wood trim near his table saw and went to work.
Meadow feigned immersion in her stitchery.
That Flora didn’t leave her alone with Colin to go greet Lake before it was time for them to pick their sisters up from the airport sent ominous confirming flares through Meadow.
Or maybe it was heat radiating off the glares Flora toasted him with as he worked.
That meant Flora may be rethinking her initial good impression of Colin.
Colin never looked up, never said another word. His tense expression and guarded body language spoke of someone harboring secrets.
Meadow should’ve seen this coming. But she’d let herself trust.
Meadow didn’t have a good feeling about this. Not. At. All.
The man was definitely hiding something.
He wanted to tell her so badly. He couldn’t. Not with Flora’s wedding days away.
At least her brother, Lake, had been civil.
Colin was glad he’d opened up. If Lake and Flora trusted him, maybe Meadow could too. He couldn’t kick the fear that Thursday would summon bad memories and crack the foundation of friendship he’d carefully poured with Meadow.
Colin had about worked up nerve to pull Meadow aside and discuss the potential impending disaster of Thursday’s gig when Flora jumped up, displaying a text. “Let’s go. Our sisters’ flight landed early.”
They left without comment, but the look Meadow sent over her shoulder knocked breath from his chest. Shards of pain and accusation lanced out her eyes. Why? Did she get wind of who would be at that engagement party and suspect it was a setup?
She likely felt the distance he’d just put between them. It hadn’t been intentional. He was in cahoots with himself over knowing his camaraderie with Meadow was about to further upend if he wasn’t careful.
Blythe’s track record suggested she’d likely get mean and mouthy if she saw Meadow, and he hadn’t wanted to tip Blythe off that she might have the chance by asking more questions. He needed to find a way to go to that party to protect Meadow.
Problem was, his only in was Blythe’s invitation as her guest. With Del back, Meadow hadn’t asked him to assist with future caters.
Lord, you knew about this cater centuries ago, maybe even arranged it. Help Meadow through what’s sure to seem like her worst job ever. Things aren’t always as they appear. Look out for her that day and each day after. If I may also ask, please protect her fragile trust in me. Use this gig to strengthen rather than strain our relationship.
Over the next days, Colin grieved not getting to spend time with Meadow. She was curt at church on Sunday and wouldn’t answer or return his calls. Del said to give her time. Flora wasn’t speaking to him either at this point, but she was likely swamped silly with her siblings and nuptials looming.
As he worked on finishing Meadow’s kitchen the day of the engagement party, he wondered. Had he done something wrong, something other than keeping a distance between them that day he’d seen Blythe? He strained his brain. Had she gotten the guest list and seen his name next to Blythe’s? He’d explain, if he ever got ahold of Meadow.
They’d shared a beautiful kiss; one that felt like it brushed and branded their souls as well as their lips, then wham. Her walls went back up. Higher and more formidable than before.
“Lord, if this is my Jericho, help me bring down these walls.”
“Blythe’s out of control,” her cousin told Colin the instant he arrived at the engagement after party. His mother had asked him last minute to take his dad to chemo. Having done so, Colin walked in late, just in time to hear Blythe’s grating voice.
“You know flora’s a bacterium? Oh, I forgot. Your mama mixed her meth up with her birth control pills. Had so many kids, only organic names were left.”
Refusing to stand idle this time, Colin rushed to Meadow, who looked equally hurt and homicidal. Approaching her side, he whispered, “She’s not worth it. Stay calm.”
Blythe’s smirk confirmed she was out to destroy Meadow’s career and business reputation by making her lose her temper during a legally binding job. It heartened Colin to see horror reflected on faces of family and friends close enough to hear. It proved they respected Meadow more than they pledged allegiance to Blythe and her scheme. Colin hoped Meadow saw their support too. Right now she looked like all she could see was red.
Tsking, Blythe vulture-circled Meadow. “Poor Little Miss Misfit, always running away. Never could take up for herself, even when her drugged-up daddy knocked her sister into next week.”
Her self-control at snap point and her body pulsing with anger, Meadow shot forward.
Colin launched in front of her, facing Blythe, pressing Meadow backward with his body. But unleashed anger imbued her with the fierceness of a freight train in transit. She turned, wrapping her arms tightly around her so she couldn’t rip out Blythe’s hair. Colin kissed his mouth to her ear while walking her backward into the adjacent garden room. “Let God deal with her.”
Colin’s heart broke at the trembling beneath him. The depths of hurt inflicted, the guilt wound Blythe’s words reopened. Meadow heaved from unchecked emotion.
He hau
led her against him. “It’s not your fault, sweetheart. Your dad made his choices. Had he not been sent up, worse tragedy may’ve befallen your family, your sisters, your brother. You protected them by telling the truth about your abuse.”
No wonder she felt so close to Del, such a responsibility to help her.
Meadow still quaked violently. Now he couldn’t tell if it was all from emotional trauma or also from years of pent-up anger. He held her closer. After a moment, her forehead lowered against his chest.
The click-clack of heels sounded on marble tile.
“Isn’t this cozy? You two look about to make a bunch of little Irish Meadows.”
Colin whirled. “Enough!”
Stunned at his tone, Blythe stumbled backward. Rage surfaced. “How dare y—.”
“I’m not finished.” He faced Blythe down. “I should’ve stood up for her against you years ago, Blythe. Meadow has actually done something noble with her life. Unlike you, still spoiled and living off Daddy’s wealth.”
Blythe gasped, then fled the room wailing.
“I knew she’d act like a villain.”
“You knew she’d be here?” Meadow blinked.
“I tried to warn you, to cushion the shock, but you rejected all my calls and refused to answer my door.” He smiled ruefully.
“You were with Blythe at the mall.”
“You saw us?”
“Yes. I thought—” Red adorned her cheeks. She groaned. Paced.
Colin chuckled. “That’s why you’ve been avoiding me. The reason I was with—”
“It doesn’t matter.” Meadow ran into his open arms. “Sorry I was swift to doubt and slow to trust.”
“Meadow, you can’t do something bad enough to make me stop lov—” His lips clamped. He’d almost blurted his feelings.
Her dropped chin and open mouth told him she knew. “What were you about to say?”
He drew breath. Tried to say but got tongue-tied. What if she rejected him?
Face softening, she inched close, hand over his heart. “Then I’ll say it. I guess you know I love you,” she whispered straight from her heart to his.
“I’d hoped.” He grasped her hand, still resting against his chest, then soaked in the joyous moment of deeply held dreams coming true. “I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you kicking that snowman.”