"You said it, I didn't."
"Maybe if you just hang tough, he'll give up."
"I keep hoping the same thing. But…" Jenna let a weary shrug finish the thought.
Lacey nodded. "Mack McGarrity is not the type who gives up."
"Exactly."
Lacey picked up her coffee mug and sipped. Then she set the mug down. "Can I ask you something?"
"Go ahead."
"Didn't you notice that you never got the final papers for your divorce?"
Jenna braced her elbows on the table and rubbed at her eyes. "It crossed my mind now and then. But you have to understand, it was over. We'd made an agreement. The rest felt like formalities. And I wasn't thinking about marrying anyone else then, so…"
Lacey was watching her way too closely. "Don't hate me, but are you really sure it's over between you and Mack?"
Jenna's answer was immediate. "Of course I am. Why?"
"Well, there was just something so … powerful, between the two of you. It's not the same with Dr. Do—er, Logan."
Jenna knew she shouldn't ask, but she couldn't seem to stop herself. "What do you mean, not the same?"
"Well, you and Logan are just perfect for each other, on the surface. A couple of straight arrows who want to raise a bunch of cute, happy kids. But there's something a little bit…" Lacey let the sentence trail off unfinished.
Jenna shifted in her chair impatiently. "What? A little bit what?"
"I don't know. Lukewarm, I guess. Something kind of tepid about the whole thing."
Jenna felt defensive—and tried not to let it show. "Logan and I are both mature adults now. We know what we want. If that seems lukewarm to you—"
Lacey put up a hand, palm out. "Look. Sorry. I'm talking out of turn. Logan adores you. He always has."
Jenna easily read between the lines of what Lacey had just said. When Lacey used words like tepid and lukewarm, it wasn't Logan she was talking about.
Jenna shifted in her chair again. "There is a lot more to making a marriage work than how much heat is generated."
"I realize that," Lacey said gently. "Honestly I do." She reached across the table and wiggled her fingers. "Come on. Put 'er there."
Jenna slid her hand into her sister's.
"So," Lacey said. "What do you plan to do now?"
Jenna groaned. "Leave the country?"
Lacey gave Jenna's hand a squeeze. "Come on. Seriously. What next?"
"Well, I'll see a lawyer on Monday, just to make certain of my options."
"And then?"
"If it turns out there's nothing I can do but give Mack his two weeks or divorce him all over again, I'm going to wait a while. Hang tough, as you put it. See if, just maybe, I can outlast him. I mean, eventually he has to get tired of hanging around here … doesn't he?"
"Hey, don't ask me. I'm only the little sister—and if he won't give up and give you the papers, then what?"
"What choice do I have? I'll start divorce proceedings. Again."
Lacey looked down at their joined hands. "What will you tell Logan?"
"The truth."
"When?"
Now Jenna was squeezing Lacey's hand. She teased, "For someone who has never liked Logan, you seem awfully worried about him all of a sudden."
Lacey pulled away. "What do you mean, I never liked Logan? Of course I like Logan. Just because he drives me insane with his endless and irritating advice on how I should run my life doesn't mean I don't care about him—and you haven't answered my question. When will you tell him?"
"As soon as he gets back from Seattle."
* * *
Jenna went to see a new lawyer on Monday and heard what she already knew. She could turn in the old papers, signed by both parties, and be eligible to remarry in about six months. Or she could start the whole process all over again.
After she talked to the lawyer, she did nothing. After all, she told herself, that was what she had planned to do, see if she could wait Mack out.
Logan had arrived home too late on Sunday for them to get together. But Monday night they went out to dinner. Jenna planned to tell him about Mack then. But she didn't. She said nothing. She spent the meal asking him a thousand unnecessary questions about his trip and trying her best not to let him see how on edge she was.
Logan stopped in at the house for a while when he took her home. Lacey was there. Logan mentioned that he'd noticed an ad in the Meadow Valley Sun. The local art supply store needed a sales representative.
"Thanks, Doc," Lacey replied. "But I think I'd rather enter a convent. Or maybe hire myself out to a medical research lab somewhere. You know, as a human guinea pig for important experiments that could mean the end of cancer in our lifetime."
Logan let out a weary sigh. "Lacey, I'm not joking. It might turn out to be a good thing for you."
Lacey opened her mouth to utter more wisecracks, but Jenna caught her eye. Lacey smiled sweetly. "No, thanks, Doc. Really." A moment later she slipped from the room.
She reappeared as soon as Logan left.
"You didn't tell him, did you?" She was shaking her head.
"I just couldn't bear to."
"You'll have to. Eventually."
"I know. And I will. Eventually."
But not right now.
For right now, Jenna waited. Though she couldn't sleep at night and she was distracted in the daytime, she waited. And felt frustration and misery and a kind of righteous fury that Mack had put her in this untenable position in the first place.
She waited, hoping against hope that Mack would see how unreasonable and outlandish his ultimatum was. That she'd check the mailbox one evening and find the signed papers there—along with a short note of apology from Mack saying he regretted any pain he'd caused her and he was headed back to Key West.
She waited.
And she thought too much about Mack—so much that she found herself wishing more than anything that she could make herself stop thinking about him. She wished she could stop thinking about the ways he was the same as he used to be—and the ways he was different. Wished she could stop wondering about what he might be doing with himself, hanging out at the Northern Empire Inn with nothing to do but wait for her to call. She wished she could stop thinking about how she shouldn't be thinking about him and she was going to stop thinking about him—which only led her to think about him some more.
On Wednesday she and Logan met for lunch. He frowned at her across the table and said she seemed distracted lately. He wanted to know what was wrong.
She evaded. She thought, this will all blow over. Mack will come to his senses and send me the papers and then Logan and I can laugh about how silly the whole thing was.
Logan said, "Those papers haven't come from Florida yet, have they? Is that what's been on your mind?"
She gulped and admitted that the divorce papers had been on her mind, and that no, she didn't have them yet.
"Maybe you should call Mack McGarrity again."
Before she was forced to come up with a reply to that suggestion, the waiter miraculously appeared with their food. Once the waiter left, she exercised great care to move the conversation onto safer ground.
On Wednesday evening, as she was closing up the shop, Jenna thought she saw Mack across the street, just going into a store called Furniture By Hand. She stood at her own shop window for several minutes, waiting to see him come out of the other shop's door.
He never emerged, at least not while she watched for him.
She wondered, was it really Mack? Or just someone who looked like him? Or worse, could it be her imagination working scarily overtime? It occurred to her that she couldn't even be sure that he was still in town.
That night she called the Northern Empire Inn for the second time. She asked for Mack McGarrity's room. And the clerk put her through.
He answered on the second ring that time. "McGarrity here,"
She said, "I was hoping you might have come to your senses and gone home."
<
br /> "No. I'm still here."
"This isn't right, Mack. It isn't fair."
She heard him draw in a breath. "It's only two weeks, Jenna."
"Give me those papers and go back to Florida where you belong."
"Not until you come with me."
She knew that the next thing she said would be shouted. So she hung up the phone, her nerves disgustingly aflutter.
She thought of those words her sister had used. Lukewarm. And tepid.
There was certainly nothing tepid about her response to Mack McGarrity.
But what about Logan? Was she lukewarm and tepid when it came to him?
Well, what if she was—just a little?
Maybe she liked it that way. Maybe she was mature enough now to appreciate a kinder, gentler sort of love.
Except…
Well, it had been beautiful with Mack. In bed. Beautiful and astonishing and utterly right.
And the truth was, she and Logan had never actually made love. Not in the complete sense of the word. Not in the consummated sense.
They'd agreed to wait until after the wedding.
And waiting had seemed good and right, up till now.
Up till Mack McGarrity had appeared in town.
Up until those dreams Jenna kept having now about the way it used to be with Mack. How Mack couldn't keep his hands off her and how she couldn't stay away from him.
How they didn't wait.
Maybe, she thought Wednesday night, after she hung up on Mack for the second time that week, she and Logan needed not to wait. Maybe she and Logan needed a night in each other's arms. A night to seal their bond in the most elemental of ways.
Yes. That might just be it. She needed to make love with Logan in order to wipe out the memory of Mack's touch.
She shared her insight with Lacey on Thursday night.
Lacey blinked those big blue eyes. "Wait a minute. You're saying you and Dr. Do-Right have never…?"
"We were waiting." Jenna hated how prim she sounded. "Until the wedding. And stop calling him Dr. Do-Right."
Lacey nodded, a very unconvinced sort of nod. "Waiting. Right."
"People do wait, you know."
"I know."
"You're not acting as if you know."
"Well, I mean, it just took me by surprise, that's all. The thought of it, of you and—"
"Do not call him—"
"I won't. The thought of you and Logan…" Lacey's face was red.
"The thought of Logan and me what?"
"Well, you know. In bed. Making love. I never thought about that. But I guess that makes sense—that it would be hard for me to picture." Lacey laughed, a thoroughly irritating little titter of a laugh. "Because you've never done it, right?"
Jenna felt vaguely insulted. "You are not helping me out one bit here."
"I'm trying."
"Try harder."
"I will."
"Good. So?"
"So, in my humble opinion, if you really want to seal your bond with Logan, the first thing you ought to do is to tell him the truth. That Mack's taken a room at the Northern Empire Inn and he intends to stay there until you agree to go away with him."
"I am not going to go away with Mack."
"Don't tell me that, tell Logan."
"I will."
"When?"
"Tomorrow night, all right? Is that good enough for you?"
"Now is better. And don't look at me like that. You asked."
"Well, fine. All right. I'll call him right now, tell him I need to talk with him."
Lacey turned around and snared the phone off the breakfast nook wall. "Here you go."
Jenna took it—and then just sat there, holding it. "What?" Lacey groaned. "All of a sudden you've forgotten his number?"
"Of course I haven't forgotten his number. I know his number."
"Hey. Look here. You've got him on autodial."
"Lacey—"
But it was too late. Lacey had punched the button and Logan's phone was ringing.
"This is Dr. Severance."
"Uh. Hello."
"Jenna, Hello." As always, he sounded so happy to hear her voice. "What's up?"
"I wonder…" She hesitated.
Lacey mouthed the words, "Do it!"
Jenna made a face at her sister and then forced herself to go on. "Do you think you could come over here? There are a few things I need to talk to you about." Lacey gave her the high sign and a big, congratulatory grin.
Logan said, "Are you all right?"
"I'm fine. I just … really need to talk to you."
"I'll be over right away."
* * *
Chapter 4
« ^ »
Lacey decided to make herself scarce. As she went out the door, she advised, "Don't wait up—and don't you dare chicken out this time."
"I won't," Jenna replied, sounding a lot more confident than she felt.
Logan arrived five minutes later. Jenna led him to the back parlor, the big, comfortable room off the kitchen, where the family had always gathered. He sat on the roomy dark green convertible sofa and looked up at her, a worried frown creasing his brow. "This is about whatever's been bothering you for the past week, isn't it?"
She sat down beside him. "Yes."
He turned toward her, still frowning. In his somber expression she saw his concern for her. And his love. "You know that whatever it is, you can tell me, don't you?"
"I know. I just…"
"You know that I love you?"
"I do. And I love you." It was true. She did love him.
But not in the way she had loved Mack McGarrity. And that did bother her. It bothered her terribly. "Logan, I wonder…?"
"Yes?"
"Would you … kiss me? Really kiss me?"
He sat back from her a little. "Kiss you? I thought you were going to tell me—"
She put three fingers lightly against his lips, to silence him. "I will. I'll tell you. I'll explain everything. Just … would you please kiss me first?"
His dark gaze scanned her face. "Kiss you."
"Yes. Please."
His expression softened a little, the worried frown fading. He slid an arm around her shoulder and gently, with the tip of a finger, tipped her mouth up to his.
Light as a breath, his lips met hers. His mouth was warm and soft and his big arms cradled her cherishingly.
She closed her eyes and tried to give herself fully to the act of kissing him, sliding her hands up his broad chest, allowing her lips to part, inviting him to deepen the kiss. His tongue slid into her mouth.
Jenna sighed. But she knew as the small, tender sound escaped her that it was a fake sigh, a forced sigh, an effort to convince herself—and Logan, too—that she was an eager participant in this.
Jenna closed her eyes tighter, kissed him back harder, tried to call up memories of when they'd been teenagers.
Teenagers necking in the front seat of his car.
It had been exciting then, hadn't it? She was certain it had.
But now wasn't then.
Between now and then, there had been Mack.
Mack.
That did it. Just the thought of his name.
Jenna shoved at Logan's chest.
Startled, Logan pulled away enough to look down at her. "What is it? What's wrong?"
He still had his arms around her. She felt trapped there, all wrong there. "Please. Let go."
He released her and sat back. "Jenna, what the hell is going on here?"
"I … I don't think I can marry you, Logan." She didn't know she was going to say it until after the words were out. And then, once she had said it, she stared at him, stunned at what she herself had just uttered.
Logan stared back at her, bewildered. And hurt.
"Why not?"
She took his hand and looked into his face, right into his eyes. "You are such a good man. A kind man. A man who wants just what I want. A man I could always count on to be there when I needed hi
m…"
"Then why can't you marry me?"
"Because this … you and me … it just isn't right for me."
His dark eyes were shining, a shine that very well might have come from unshed tears. Jenna watched his Adam's apple move as he swallowed, forcing down the emotions a man hesitates to reveal.
When he spoke, as always, he strove for calm and reason. "And how did you come to this realization?"
She looked away, and then back. And then, finally, she made herself say it. "Mack's in town. He's refused to sign the divorce papers unless I spend two weeks with him first."
Logan swore under his breath. Then he asked, carefully, "How long has he been here?"
"A week."
"And you … didn't feel you could tell me?"
"I kept hoping he'd give up and go away. I'm furious with him, and I can't believe he's doing this and … I just wanted it to all be over before I said anything to you."
"But it's not over."
Jenna hitched in a tight breath. "No. It's not."
"You're talking about more than just the divorce papers, aren't you? You're talking about you and him."
Jenna wished with all her heart that she didn't have to answer that. But she knew that she did.
"I believed it was over, between Mack and me," she said. "I swear I did, or I never would have said yes when you asked me to marry you."
"But…?"
"But the minute I saw him again…" She shook her head. "I don't want to get back together with him. It could never work out. But there is unfinished business between Mack McGarrity and me. And I think I'm going to have to take care of it."
"Wait a minute. Don't tell me that you'll do what he wants you to do, that you'll actually go away with him!"
Jenna swallowed. "I … it's possible. I just might."
Logan held her hand more tightly, squeezing the fingers hard enough that she winced. "Jenna, look what's going on here, look at the way he's maneuvering you. He's a manipulative S.O.B."
Gently Jenna pulled her hand free. "Lacey more or less called him the same thing."
"It looks like this is one situation where Lacey and I actually agree."
"You don't understand. You don't know him. He lost his parents when he was very young. He never had a real family. He grew up in foster homes. He had to scratch and scuffle for everything he ever got. When he wants something, he goes after it, any way he has to."
THE MILLIONAIRE SHE MARRIED Page 4