The Richard Burton Diaries

by Richard Burton

  JULY

  Tuesday 1st Biked and read am perfectly content when not boozing.

  Wednesday 2nd Gained 21/2kg. Back on diet. JB buying every conceivable gadget for kitchen. Biked to lake with Troy. Have taught him to drive Mini-Moke. Can't get him off it now. Must check on MG.

  Thursday 3rd Arose at 6.30. Walked around block at spanking pace. Sun out so sat and read and pondered. Got rid of hired car. Biked in the evening with kids and JB. Read again until minuit.40 Awoke at 6. Full of vitamins and fit as 30. Not a drink in sight for days.

  Friday 4th Walked round block 7am. 28 minutes. Read Angela Davis’ autobiography.41 Not very impressed. Watched Wimbledon B. J. King whopped Goolagong 6–0 6–1.42 Massacre. Went to bed early. Slept like proverbial log last night. One of the rewards of sobriety though Dylan told me otherwise. Over-ate.

  Saturday 5th Walked block. Sat in watery sunshine. Solowicz came from town. Smug odious little man. Think might go to NY and LA ‘to be seen’ as they say. Much prefer solitude. [...] Dinner in Founex. Good. People at next table very German, very English, very loud.

  Sunday 6th Sunned a bit read and read biked a bit. Bored. Troy drives moke all day long unless stopped. [...]

  Monday 7th JB crashed into tractor from next door farm so sent for Hertz.43 Lunched. Stopped at service station and found that MG was fully serviced so now have one crashed car, one wreck (temp I hope) and hired one. Talked to E and Liza (both in London). Liza expecting (hoping) to come here on Tuesday.

  Tuesday 8th Made various arrangements with Kate who's in Paris and Liza. They arrive Tuesday. Brother Will and wife Betty plus Rhian (daughter) want to come but date not fixed yet. Gawd help me.

  Wednesday 9th La Réserve for lunch. Very hot. Read [...] biography of one Hankey never heard of him.44

  Thursday 10th Table tennised with Troy. He could become very good. Stiff as a brace afterwards. Weather brilliant but suddenly turned. [...] Am insane for sweets and ice cream. Can't stop and sleep a lot. Very bad.

  Friday 11th Took crashed car and MG to carrosserie.45 Meantime hired car again. Maddening. Read book by Shirley MacLaine.46 Not very good but did increase interest in China. Must go there. Early to bed. Ate ice and chocs all day long again.

  Saturday 12th Weighed 81kgs! 176lbs! 12st 8! Disgraceful. That's what Tete de Negre, Suchard, et al. can do to a slim lissome lithe limber 49 year old. Went on stringent diet (OK, WD47 of low carb). Talked to Liza who wanted to get hold of Kate in Paris [...]. Biked to Grans beach with Troy.48 Horrid. Lunched at Dominos.49 Pedal boated. Swam in lake. T. Tennis with JB and Troy. Exhausted.

  Sunday 13th, Céligny ETB returned Leningrad. She sounds a harassed mess. Wonder if I can put up with all that again. Try I suppose. Have an idea it won't last. Also she is beginning to sound like her mother at times. Frightening prospect. She denied what she'd said to JB about ‘Why don't you leave. You're young and life must be boring in a Swiss village etc.’ JB said nothing except let her ramble on.

  Monday 14th (80kg) Glorious morn. Awoke at 5.30. [...] Very hot and sweaty. Couldn't read in the sun as sweat poured into my eyes. [...] Keep on dreaming that I've been drinking and then awake with delight to find I have not!

  Tuesday 15th (79kg) Awoke at six. A beautiful morning. Hope weather holds. Kate arrived looking glorious. Hasn't grown which is a good thing. They, the females stayed up until 2.30 where I found them when I came down for ice cold water. Liza arrives to-morrow. Fullish house. Swam in lake at Céligny with Troy. Lunched at D'Alleves.50 Table tennis with Troy. LOST! Now for Liza!

  Wednesday 16th (79kg) Liza arrived à l'heure!51 Still short with yellow teeth but lovely nevertheless.

  Thursday 17th (79kg) Kids settling sleeping arrangements. Maria has dreadful cough. Taking for X-ray. Turned out to be sinus. [...] Kate and Liza corporate devils. Troy very spoiled but not by me. Getting better. Bit of a smart-ass. He'll learn.

  Friday 18th (79kg) Will Betty Rhian arrived 11/2 hours too early. I was infuriated. Will in bad shape. Has become very old man. Wheel-chair, stick and all.

  Saturday 19th Weather lousy. Will and I stayed all day together. Took girls and Troy to discotheque at Nyon. Danced! Twice. Left and took taxi home after 10 minutes. Sanka with cream and off to bed with Kipling (biography).52

  Sunday 20th Awoke with the dawn. Sat on terrace and read tedious book by Michener clept Drifters what a poor mind he has!53 Played ping-pong. Sat in sun. Still on diet. Down from that appalling 81kg to 77. Will broke my sword-stick silly bastard and fell to boot. Putting in hospital tomorrow. He's a mess. Wife Bett f. stupid. Daughter fat and staggeringly tongue struck. K leaves tomorrow.

  Monday 21st Sunned swam read – even letters. Aaron intolerably repetitive. Have dreams of firing him but after 26 years together with multiple sclerosis haven't the courage.

  Tuesday 22nd Took Will to hospital. Endless corridors. Started smoking herbal cigs. Not bad. Girls went to discotheque in Geneva. Little ones not allowed in.

  Wednesday 23rd (77+kg) Swam, biked, sat in sun with Liza, read visited Will in hospital. They may have found root of trouble. Hope to God yes.

  Thursday 24th (77kg) Woke 6am spent all morning at hospital with Will in agony. Impossible to find doctor. Saw nurse. Insisted she gave him shot. Better after that. Went home after that in fury and as usual ate and ate chocs and ice-cream. Will show on scales tomorrow. Read sad and silly little book called Exterminator.54 Re-reading Golden Bough.55

  Friday 25th (77kg) Saw Will in hospital. Looks terrible and is in great pain all the time. Insisted they gave him stronger painkillers.

  Friday [Saturday] 26th (77kg) Went to bring Will home from hospital.

  Saturday [Sunday] 27th Took whole family to Rolle to eat, swim, row, sunbathe. Will much better.

  Monday 28th Talked to Will all day practically. Surprising how little one knows about one's own brother.

  Tuesday 29th Sunned. Had tea with producer [...] at D'Alleves. Very German. Have a feeling this film won't surface either. Has the same air as Jackpot. Takes place in Israel so I might see it at last.56 [...]

  Wednesday 30th Exercised but irritable all day. Liza going through yet another crisis with some bloke in Geneva via discotheque. Had eyes tested again. Bloke says I read too much. [...] Wish to Christ that Liza would grow an inch or two.57 Talked to Gwen Gwyneth Kate. Norma. Brian Tashorne popped in to talk rugby. Told highly suspect story about Carwyn James and Llanelli.58

  Thursday 31st

  Liza and Maria leave today for Leningrad. 33 days booze-less. I'm as brown as I can get so didn't court the sun yesterday. Read biography of Dorothy L. Sayers – Such a strange Lady.59 Will still boringly ill some days.

  AUGUST

  Friday 1st National Holiday. Went shopping Geneva. Bought new typewriter.

  Saturday 2nd Lindsay Anderson and Gottlieb arrive today.60

  Sunday 3rd Glorious day. Liza, ETB, phoned. Latter finished on the 14th inst. Can't believe it and think of nothing else. What will it be like seeing her again. I'm a little scared. Jeannie Bell desperate. Keep my fingers crossed.

  Monday 4th Very hot.

  Tuesday 5th Sent telegram to Liza. ETB up to some game I don't quite understand.

  Wednesday 6th Liza's birthday. Send another gram to Liza. Obtained temporary hearing-aid for Will. Revelation he says.

  Thursday 7th Talked Solowicz. Cannot find room anywhere for weekend for Jeannie and me.

  Friday 8th Went ‘La Réserve’, Versoix for weekend with JB. Tiny room. Hated it.

  Saturday 9th Weather uncertain. Under façade hotel is gimcrack. [...] Saw film in a cinema yet! English version Burt Lancaster and Paul Scofield. Indifferent thriller.61

  Sunday 10th Went home to Céligny. Had left roof window in bathroom open. Place soaked by furious rains while away. Had to remove carpet.

  Monday 11th Terrible weather. Stayed home all day apart from morning visit to Coppet for ‘Boules des Berlin’ – otherwise doughnuts fresh from oven. Talked Aaron. Sounded 100 years old. ETB did not
call as promised. Troy very recalcitrant. Needs stiff discipline.

  SEPTEMBER

  Saturday 6th Céligny with ETB and Liza and friend Ali (Alexandra) Maria. Raymond took them all dancing. Both according to telegram should have arrived yesterday but muck up and arrive today. ETB got tearful about HW's father.62 Good God the man is 80. Sq. for the 4 or 5th time. [sic] Still no booze.

  Sunday 7th Troy arrives, Layton arrives. Both arrived! Tremendous thunderstorm. Phones have been dead for (so far) 16 hours. Maria, Ally (Liza's friend), Layton, Maria, Liza, so full house.

  Monday 8th, Céligny Children back to School? [...] E and I more nervous than they. Bags, bikes E called HW. Long. E sounds so dramatic on telephone. She's just apologized by saying she has a lousy cold. [...]

  Tuesday 9th Slept late. Went into Coppet for doughnuts. To Au Domino for E's handbag. Lunched D'Alleves. Kids have day off on Thurs. [...] Terribly sleepy all day after bad night. Article McCall's hanging over my head.63

  Wednesday 10th Kate's birthday. One day's holiday for Troy, Layton, Maria.

  Thursday 11th Liza and Alessandra Mavroleon (Ally) left by train. [...]

  Monday 15th – Wednesday 17th, Gstaad

  Thursday 18th, Gstaad Brook arrived. Drove down to Geneva to pick him up. Looks very good.

  Friday 19th, Gstaad Kids arrived for weekend.

  Saturday 20th, Gstaad Kids and Gstaad. Troy cooked a supper that was an abomination to the Lord. The dessert was unspeakable.

  Sunday 21st Children returned (train) to school. Going (us) to S. Africa on Wednesday. Reading up in Encyclopedia Britannica. My ignorance is appalling.

  Monday 22nd Sunned. Read.

  Tuesday 23rd, Gstaad-Céligny Left for Céligny with Brook and bike in exchange for Troy-Liza bike at school. Did it all in one fell swoop.

  Wednesday 24th, Céligny Flew Geneve – Zurich. Zurich – Johannesburg. 14 hours.

  Thursday 25th, Johannesburg Arrived Johannesburg. Many people at airport. Thousands I suppose.

  Friday 26th Went to ‘club’ downstairs with creepy Peter Lawford.64 [...] Terrible food danced with unknown girl. Press took pics. Also said I was drunk. Cheek. [...] Went to tennis. Pres and wife.65 Usual agonizing boredom stiff with protocol.

  Saturday 27th Tennis. Ugh! [...] Ringo out of his skull.66 Very unhappy man.

  Sunday 28th Went to ‘Grand Bal’. Auctioned ‘Hiz’ and ‘Liz’ for 2000 Rand. Much the biggest buy of the evening. Went to bed at 6am.

  Monday 29th, Johannesburg – Chobe Jet (Lear) to Chobe.67 1 hour 45 minutes. Landed on grass strip. Very bumpy. Saw elephants, baboons, buffaloes? Other people had terrible journey. [...] Married Elizabeth Zulu fashion.

  Tuesday 30th, Chobe Went up river with Fritz and Daniel (Black).68 Fascinating encounter with bee-eating-birds troglodytes. Saw 30–40 elephants? Also fascinating. About 5–15 baboons surrounded our suite. We thought it normal but discovered that it was a phenomenon never seen before. It would of course occur when E was here. Hereforth to be known as Elizabeth's baboons. Strange. Richard Barrett (3 Degrees man) pestered us all evening.69 Quite scary.

  OCTOBER

  Wednesday 1st, Chobe – Kruger70 Land-Rovered through real bush. Non-tourist route to lose press. E took snap after snap of you name it she took it. Result – no film in the camera and eleven bruises around her body where she banged herself against the turret of Rover. She did it again!

  Thursday 2nd, Kruger – Johannesburg Helicoptered over Kruger Park. Stampeded elephants and buffalo. Saw our second sable antelope – a very rare creature we're told. Eliz had immediate mutual love affair with cheetah – yclept Targa. Hope the pictures come out this time. Never seen E so happy but our hearts belong to Chobe. [...]

  Friday 3rd, Johannesburg Jetted to J'burg. E was in agony to the point of tears which she hid from me but I am now unfoolable. I scratched her back and held her hand. Land-Rovered again with Targa or perhaps Tagra? Latter refused to hunt impala came back to Land Rover and E every time. Like Ferdinand the bull.71 Though he has hunted and killed, his owner assured us. E went for X-ray of ribs. No cracks but two spots on lung. We must make them go away.

  Saturday 4th The most agonizing hour of my life ended at approx 1pm. Yesterday I mean. I had spent the previous hours back to approx 4pm Thursday in the most terrible fear for Elizabeth's and my life. Sleep was no palliative. I am still suffering from delayed shock and will in a lesser form, I think, continue to suffer for the rest of my life. E was incomparably brave. I love her mindlessly and hopelessly.72

  Sunday 5th We leave for Chobe tomorrow and will be in our small portion of the barren earth, paste and cover to our bones, for some days.73 I am leaving the 10,000 rand I earned on Saturday morning for our return trips. And there shall be no mucking about at Kruger or the Cape. Chobe belongs to E and me. We love each other. It's very simple. [...]

  Monday 6th E in splendid form and a trifle tiddly but sweetly so when we went to Sol's house for a late (very late!) lunch. Then E with what seems like aid and abettance from Adele (P.R.O. for Sunshine Hotels) that E and I should get married in Chobe this week I thought they were joking and said so.74 But E and E turned out to be serious. Result the latter half of the day a series of 1/2 joking 1/2 bitter invective from E. I told her that I was afraid! Literally afraid, at the moment, that marriage might horrifyingly end in divorce. We will of course get married again if E so wishes but until I get over my fear and since I am, at least, deliriously happy at the moment why spoil it!

  Tuesday 7th, Johannesburg – Chobe Grass landing. Slight brush with grim reaper. Left suspension, left wheel packed it in. Very rough landing. Guess that we were within 6–8–12 inches from kingdom come. Decided to get married here as soon as possible unless E (or I, for that matter) changes mind. Love her beyond measure and above anything. She fast asleep. Bathed and shamp in private pool. Shiver, shiver, shake shake. Can't wait for E to awaken! [...]

  Wednesday 8th, Chobe Awoke at dawn. Went up river in the afternoon. Carmine breasted bee-eater chief delight. E talks endlessly about wedding. Can't make up my mind. Might be that cancer scare has given everything an unnatural shape. Also, like being hanged, it concentrates a man's mind wonderfully. All well.

  Thursday 9th Stayed in bed all day yesterday. Read and slept. E fed me in bed lunch though had dinner in living room. Looks like marriage is on. I wonder why I am still doubtful. It doesn't seem right but I don't know why. Perhaps I'm afraid of legal responsibility. Also sex urge temporarily dormant. Very puzzling.

  Friday 10th75 Got shamefully sloshed and despite all my idiocies – nasty too – we are as happy as children. We catch our breaths every so often and say with a kind of smiling wonder and delight ‘Hey!’ Do you realize we are actually married?’ We must have said it scores of times. I have never been so happy in my life. E cured me with loving even lavish attention. This is far better marriage than the first despite its silly (and dangerous) beginning [...]

  Saturday 11th Woke up feeling very ill and to make sure that I would not get sloshed on ‘livener’ ETB gave me antabus which might quite easily have killed me feeling as I was.76 However, despite physical ill-being felt emotionally very content. Worried about E. She not aware of it but sometimes, in a few seconds she changes colour. Much as I (and she) loves this place must get her back to somewhere sophisticated for a thorough check up. Sleep on it and tell her tomorrow perhaps. Nobody else seems to notice, but I watch my love intently without making [it] obvious. Please God she's OK. I'd die without her now.

  Sunday 12th Went on picnic. Cucumber sandwiches on the marriage grounds. Cold wine, beer, champagne and cold chicken for the other. Coca-Colas and water for me. E still worrying me. So much so that I wonder if she thinks me a bit weird at times. She started talking oddly too now and again. [...] Went by Land Rover and returned by boat. Fritz (manager) Brian (white hunter) and wife.77 [...] E came back into bedroom and fell fast asleep. Is asleep now. Will finish this tomorrow.

  Monday 13th E arrived back from safari ver
y late. [...] Black told me ‘Madam sick,’ she was too. Brian and Fritz with much difficulty, as there was no purchase at first got her out of Land Rover. Put her to bed. Undressed her. Said she was fine until she smoked cigarette then blacked out. Insisted she took shot. What is it? Nerves? Not enough exercise? Can't be lungs unless doctor an idiot. Liver? Want to take her back to England for check.

  Tuesday 14th [...] E assiduously writing journal. Writes simply and well though spelling atrocious. She felt faint again twice after cigs. What the devil is it? Read hysterical book by one Douglas Reed called Siege of S. Africa.78 Utterly absurd political rubbish for the most part but sometimes some truth to it. Must find out more about South Africa.

  Wednesday 15th Got up early. Drank some wine while E asleep. Felt terrible. She took one look at me and put me to bed. I said it was malaria pills. She very not amused. Slept it off in a couple of hours. She still writing. Got the bug of writing. Told her the hard part was yet to come. News of wedding has broken earlier than expected. [...]

  Thursday 16th Press all over the place, so confined to camp. [...] Gavin enjoying himself hugely though pretends to great savoir faire.79 E getting lazy again about writing. Loves Chobe (so do I) but would like to see and hear more – not animals but people of Botswana. One of them curtsied to E yesterday and she was frightened of the obsequity. They smile, she says, but hardly ever with their eyes. I must know more about them. How do they really think of white men? Of Europeans?

  Friday 17th E didn't write at all yesterday. Gave her a mild row. Will not believe that she has anything to say and that she writes beautifully. Needs constant reassurance. Offers of money – quite large sums for her journal pouring in, so she may get her finger out again. [...] Press know all about wedding down to tiniest details that we worked out it can only be Ambrose (District Comiss) Masalila.80 Wedding place has name apparently – Serendella, apparently.81 Cannot blame him. Press very tenacious and insidious. Also obscure DC in obscure country doubtless enjoyed his hour upon the stage. Very unusual man if he didn't. Press searching for us everywhere. [...] Gavin beaming with long ‘talks’ on telex with J'burg. Must teach him not to get too funny with press. [...]