He handed her his card on the way out.
“If you need anything,” he said, “anything at all, please call. You don’t have to go through this alone, Serenity.”
She reached out to take the card. He held on for a moment too long, staring into her eyes, before he let go. She thought he was about to say something else, but he dropped his hand and gave her a brief nod before turning away.
Serenity slipped the card into the back pocket of her jeans.
She was glad he had finally gone and she could get back to the hotel. She had been aching for Sebastian all day and hoped their reunion wouldn’t be marred by last night’s fight. Each time she remembered, her stomach dropped. Trying to force him into something he clearly wasn’t ready for had been stupid, especially catching him at such a special, amazing moment. Serenity wished she could change things and remember last night for his tenderness and the words he’d uttered over and over, and not for what she’d tried to make him do.
Sebastian being angry with her didn’t change what she wanted; to be a part of what he was. She’d had enough of this life—it brought her nothing but pain. Maybe she was being utterly selfish, but Serenity didn’t care. It was time she started thinking about herself, she’d never had the luxury before.
As dusk fell, Sebastian walked into the hotel room.
A smile broke out on Serenity’s face and she rose from the couch to greet him.
He lowered his face to hers and kissed her on the mouth, deep and sweet. She melted against him but he pulled away.
“I have something for you,” he said holding out her necklace. Thick leather gloves covered his hands.
“My ‘Serenity’ necklace!” she exclaimed, taking the jewelry from him. “Where did you find it?”
He winced. “You don’t want to know.”
“I thought I’d lost it.”
She reached around her throat to hook the necklace together and remembered the chain was broken. The memory of how it broke flooded through her and Serenity’s cheeks flushed with guilt. Instead of putting the chain on, she slipped the necklace into her back pocket.
“Thank you,” she said. “What’s with the gloves?”
He grinned and tugged at the fingers, pulling them off. “They’re not a fashion statement. Silver isn’t good for my kind.”
“What do you mean?”
“It causes a bad reaction. The metal burns and affects us in other ways, weakening us.”
“I’ll make sure I keep any away from you then.”
“Don’t worry, it’s only if silver comes into direct contact with skin.”
“I won’t wear the necklace,” she promised, reaching out, pulling him down to her. “I wouldn’t want you to come up with any reason not to be near me.”
He sank down onto the couch and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close.
“I’m sorry about last night,” he told her, his face buried in her hair.
“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for.”
He pulled away and took her hand. Suddenly, she felt like he was about to deliver bad news.
“That’s not what I’m talking about. I mean, I’m sorry for last night. I shouldn’t have allowed things between us to go so far.” He shook his head, and stared down at his lap.
She pulled her hand from his. “I don’t believe you. Don’t tell me you wish we’d never slept together?”
“I... I just know we’re going to find it even harder to say goodbye now.”
“Don’t say that.”
He looked back up at her, his eyes searching hers. “Do you think I am doing this because I want to? Our sleeping together didn’t make the problem go away, Serenity. Madeline is still out there. She won’t give up until she either gets what she wants or she kills you.”
“Or you do as I ask,” she said.
“Don’t do this again,” he shifted slightly away from her, his body language showing what he was trying to force his heart to do. “I won’t make you what I am. I want you to have a happy, normal life—and you will never have that with me.”
“What if I do it?” she said in desperation. “What if I kill myself? I’ll slit my wrists or take a drug overdose. Will you turn me then?”
His hand shot out and grabbed her wrist. He squeezed hard, fury in his eyes. She tried to pull away, but he held her in an iron grip and his icy skin burned her flesh.
“Don’t you even think about it!” he said. Yellow flames lit his eyes, the green melting away like the sun setting into the ocean. “I won’t let you.”
She tilted her chin in defiance.
“You won’t let me?” she said, scorn tainting her voice. “Is that what this is? Just another man telling me what to do?”
He faltered. “I’m not...”
She spoke over him. “Because you have all the power, don’t you?” Bitterness rose inside. “Just like all the other men I’ve ever known.”
He dropped her wrist. An accusatory ring of red slowly rose from her skin where he’d held her. “Is this how it starts?” she held up her arm. “Is this how you become like the rest? And I thought you were different.”
“It was an accident,” he whispered. “You know I would never hurt you on purpose.”
“Yeah, an accident. Where have I heard that one before?”
“I’m not your husband, Serenity. Or your step-father.”
Serenity didn’t speak. She stared at the ground, tears of anger, hurt and disappointment welling in her eyes, making the hotel room carpet tremble before her.
Sebastian spoke with a more gentle tone. “Is this how it’s always going to be for you, Serenity? Always judging men on the same level as your husband or step-father?” He sighed. “I always thought my life had been cursed but I guess in a way, so is yours.”
She glanced up at him and a fat tear spilled down one cheek. He reached out a hand, his cool finger wiping away the hot fluid.
“You need to understand what you’re asking, Serenity. You need to forget whatever romantic notions you have about what I am and experience the cold, hard truth. I’ll show you the truth about how vampire lives and you’ll never want to be like me.”
“Show me then,” she whispered, her heart thumping in her chest. He made sense but she didn’t want to know, not really. She loved him and didn’t want to see him as a monster.
“Shut your eyes,” he told her, “and keep them shut until I tell you.”
For once, she didn’t argue. His arms wrapped around her body and he lifted her. Serenity couldn’t continue to be angry at him—not when he might leave her at any moment. She wanted to make the most of every second they spent together and they didn’t have the luxury of time to fight.
Serenity buried her face into the smooth, cool skin of his neck; aware the number of times when she would be able to feel his skin against her lips or smell his scent was limited. Just the idea made her want to cry and she clung to him tighter.
Unaware of any doors opening or even moving through the hotel, she suddenly found herself outside. The sounds of traffic rushed past and the roar of a large airplane coming in to land at the airport swept above. The noise was strangely muffled—no, not muffled—more as though they were moving too fast for the sounds to catch up.
Wind swept past her ears, as though she was riding in a car at high speed with all the windows down. It battered against her, pulling her cheeks back, whipping her hair from her face. She struggled to breathe; the air tore past so fast.
Serenity nestled her face further into his neck, hiding from the force of the wind. Her clothes rippled around her body, her shirt clung to skin, the rest of the material billowing out behind her.
The experience was exhilarating and terrifying.
Finally, they came to a halt and Sebastian placed her on her feet.
“Wait now,” he told her. “Keep your eyes shut and don’t say anything.”
Grass crushed, wet and damp, beneath her feet and the air finally stilled. They’d left the city
far behind. The scent of damp soil and wet leaves hung on the night air. She had no idea where they were, but she didn’t dare open her eyes until Sebastian told her to.
For a moment, she thought he had left her and she was alone in the night. But then the air around her changed, like an electrical charge in the atmosphere right before a storm.
A sickening crunch and a muffled scream broke the still of the night.
Serenity cringed and whimpered, her face buried in her hands.
She didn’t want to hear anymore, but the sounds filled the night’s sky as though created by the earth itself—a horrific grunting, sucking, like a wild animal feeding from its prey.
Realization sank in and she crumpled to the ground and curled into a ball, trying to protect herself from what she was suddenly certain he had brought her here to witness.
“Open your eyes, Serenity,” he roared, his voice raw. “Look at me. See what I am.”
“No!” she cried into her hands. “Stop it, stop it!”
“Look at me, Serenity. If this is what you want, you must open your eyes!”
She didn’t want to. She wanted to hide away from the truth, but he was right; this was something she needed to see.
Forcing herself to her feet, she opened her eyes.
Sebastian stood twenty-feet away, bathed in moonlight, a body in his arms.
He raised his head, his beautiful pale face coated in blood, his green eyes now yellow and glowing in the darkness.
“Look, Serenity,” he shouted into the night. “I am a monster!”
“No,” she sobbed, shaking her head. “Why are you doing this?”
A man in his late forties lay slumped in the vampire’s arms. The body was already emaciated, his face covered in beard growth. He’d already been in a bad state, even before Sebastian had taken him, but he had been a man, a living, breathing person who once had a mother who adored him.
“Is this what you want?” he demanded, holding the corpse out toward her. “You want to take the lives of others so you can survive? Is your life more important than this man’s, or the next person you have to kill, or the next, or the next?”
Sebastian dropped the man as though he were nothing more than a bag of sand and the body hit the floor with a sickening thud. Absurdly, the thought that Sebastian should treat the body with a little more respect went through her head. She shook herself; he was dead. Whatever made him a man was gone.
She stared at the dead man in shock. Other than Jackson, she had never seen a body before and somehow this stranger was almost worse than her husband.
Frantically, she shook her head, unable to tear her eyes away from the man.
“Oh, God,” she backed away, her hand to her mouth. “I don’t want this. I only want for us to be together, for my life to stop!”
“This is the truth, Serenity! If you become like me you will kill normal, regular people to survive. Can you do that?”
“You do?” She offered as a pitiful excuse.
His eyes flashed that strange, iridescent yellow. “I had no choice! I was taken from my life—I did not choose to become what I am. If I could kill myself, then I would, but I can’t. Believe me, I’ve tried.”
Pulling all of her strength and bravery together, Serenity forced her legs to walk toward him. She tore her eyes from the body, focusing on Sebastian.
Though another man’s blood covered his face, he did not disgust her. Reflected in his image, she saw herself after she had murdered Jackson, soaked in his blood, terrified. He had not backed away from her then, but took her in his arms and washed the blood from her skin.
People did whatever was needed when they loved each other. However bad the situation, they picked themselves up and forced themselves to be strong for their loved ones.
“It’s not a choice,” she whispered. “Needing to be with you is not a choice.”
“Will nothing change your mind?”
She shook her head.
“Then I must leave,” he said, “and let Madeline come to me.”
“No! You can’t,” she screamed in frustration, her voice echoing in the empty countryside. “You are breaking my God-damn heart, Sebastian. Why did you ever even speak to me if you knew we would never be together? At least if I’d never met you, I would have stayed oblivious to happiness. Surely that is better than having the possibility in front of my face, only to be torn away again?”
They stood on the hillside, almost a normal couple having an argument, if not for the blood on Sebastian’s face and the dead body at their feet.
“I couldn’t help myself,” he said. “I saw you running through the street with such sadness in your eyes and I recognized part of myself in you. You said needing to be with me wasn’t a choice; I felt the same way about needing to talk to you.”
“So stop fighting me and do as I ask.”
“Damn it, Serenity! I will not turn you into a monster!”
She bit her lip, tears streaming down her face. The thought of losing him was too much. The idea of him being with another woman—even one he hated—was even worse.
Sebastian stepped forward, wiping the blood from his face in one swipe. He pulled her toward him, burying his face in her hair.
“What are we going to do?” he whispered into her hair. Serenity couldn’t answer; she clung to him, desperately hoping they could stay that way forever.
“Let’s go,” he said. “I shouldn’t have showed you this. I’m an idiot to think it would change anything.”
He lifted her in his arms and she let him, in the same way as the night she’d killed Jackson. Though she had sworn to herself to not let another man control her life, she had also learned there were times when it was all right to trust implicitly.
They moved through the night like ghosts, detected by only the faintest movement of air, running with the moon.
Serenity was lost in her grief, certain she was about to lose the man she loved to someone else. She didn’t care where she was, as long as she was with Sebastian.
Back in the hotel room, they made love once again, Sebastian’s claims that the previous night had been a mistake disputed by his actions. Afterward, they lay face to face, foreheads pressed together, fingers resting on each other’s cheeks. Consumed in each other, they tried to forget the threat facing them, but real life couldn’t be ignored for long.
“I have to go,” he said.
She pulled him closer. “No, not again. You’re always leaving me.”
“It won’t be for long. I need to go back to... to the body. I can’t leave it there. Bad things happen if they’re just left.”
Serenity couldn’t help it, her interest was sparked. “Would the man become like you?” A brief glint of crazy jealousy fired within her. How she could be jealous of a dead man?
She had no reason to be envious.
“They die, but then their bodies regenerate. If they’re given what they need—oxygen—the bodies will come back to life, but the brain, the soul, dies when they do.”
Sitting up, she stared at him in horror. “Zombies? Are you telling me the people you kill turn into zombies?”
He laughed—actually laughed—a sound so out of place given the situation.
“They’re not what you think. They don’t go around biting chunks out of people. They’re just bodies reacting, like a chicken after its head is cut off.”
She raised an eyebrow, “Nice.”
“Nothing about this is nice, Serenity.”
She sighed. “No, of course not. I’m sorry. So how long do you think you’ll be gone? What will you do?”
“Put the body somewhere it won’t get oxygen or be able to fight out of.”
“Fight out of?”
“Like I said, they react. Given enough time, the body fights to get what it needs.”
She shivered. “What about you?” she asked. “What do you need?”
“Me?” he nuzzled against her. “All I need is you.”
Gently, she shoved agai
nst his chest, pushing him away. “I meant you, as in a vampire. What does a vampire need to survive?”
He frowned, “The same as any human; food, air, shelter.”
“So why can’t you die?”
“We’re not human. To deprive a human of those things is easy, but a vampire is strong and fast, and heals quickly. Even if we’re deprived of any of those things for any length of time, our bodies regenerate once we come into contact with them again.”
“But you would shut down for the time being?”
“Yes. Until a time came when we were freed of our constraints, our bodies would go into a type of sleep, a type of hibernation, if you like.”
“And what would hold you? If you wanted to put another vampire somewhere they couldn’t get out, where would it be?”
“Hundreds of years ago they’d wall vampires up inside buildings to be left until the building’s walls were either damaged or knocked down. Now we have more modern materials—though stone still works, of course—but the walls would need to be incredibly thick and humans don’t build like that anymore.”
“Right,” she said, her brain ticking over.
Sebastian shook his head, “I know what you’re thinking, Serenity. Madeline is one hundred years older than I am and she wouldn’t allow herself to be put in a dangerous situation.”
“What if she wasn’t expecting it? What if she thought she was in control?”
He sat up beside her. “Don’t even think about it. You’re no match for her. I’m no match for her.
“Is considering the idea of fighting her so wrong?”
“Yes, if you’ll probably end up dead.”
“But there’s the possibility I wouldn’t?”
Neither of them spoke.
“And what if we did defeat her...” Serenity finally continued. He moved to interrupt but she lifted her hand, halting his words. “What would happen then?”
“I don’t want to put your life at risk.”
“Would you turn me?”
“No, Serenity. I’m sorry, but I wouldn’t.”
For once, she accepted his words. “But you wouldn’t be with her. You and I, we would both be alone, but we’d know the other was out there, still caring about each other.”
The Serenity Series: Box Set: Books 1-3 Page 16