by J. Woods
“Mrs. Murphy, it’s so nice to see you! Can I steal you away for a moment?” Brie gave her friend a look of gratitude as she quickly whisked her mother out of the room leaving her smiling at the stunned look on her mother’s face.
“Are you alright?” Rachel asked quietly.
“Fine, thank you.” Brie attempted a reassuring smile, knowing it didn’t quite reach her eyes.
“Let’s sit,” Rachel urged allowing Brie to follow.
For the next two hours, she was bombarded with questions about the baby, Max, their plans and eventually cupcakes and everything she and Max could ever need for Blue wrapped in neutral colours of yellows and greens. Feeling overwhelmed, she was able to sneak upstairs and found herself in the familiar room of Max’s childhood. Sitting on the bed she stared around at how the room remained practically the same from when he last occupied the space. Closing her eyes, she smiled at the excited murmurs from below, pushing aside the niggling annoyance that her own mother hadn’t brought a gift for her grandchild. The soft knock on the door brought her out of her wayward thoughts and into the darkness of her reality, staring at the very woman she was trying not to think about. Stepping into the room, Brie felt a sense of protectiveness - she didn’t want her here in this space, palpably filled with love and warmth. The very opposite of what used to be her bedroom now turned home gym. It hadn’t even been twenty-four hours after Brie moved into her college dorm that she found out her childhood bedroom was already demolished. Why it still surprised her she wasn’t sure.
“Hello,” her mother started. The word was soft but her eyes were hard, her shoulder’s pulled back as if she had something to prove. Brie allowed a tight smile but remained silent, waiting. She wouldn’t put it past her mother to start a scene at her baby shower, but she would be damned if she were disrespectful to Max’s family, her family. Her mother turned and Brie almost thought she was about to leave when she closed the door, effectively closing the two of them off from the party downstairs. She felt her defences settle comfortably in place as if waiting for the enemy to strike first. “Have you spoken to Max further about your plans?”
“No, mother. That is not a top priority for me at the moment.” She let out an audible sigh, a mixture of defence and surrender.
“How is it not? It should be your number one priority!”
“No! My number one priority is and should be my child. And I can assure you right now, that will never change, no matter how badly you wish otherwise.” She watched as the curious surprise registered across her face before she pulled her purse in front of her, her fingers reaching inside for a plain white envelope.
“Here, this is for you. Consider it my gift.” Brie took it with trepidation, unsure of what could possibly be inside. “Open it,” her mother said in frustration as she continued to stare at the paper in her hands. Pulling out the folded paper inside, she carefully unfurled the documents and gasped in shock when she read the contents. Re-reading the signed documents of her inherited trust, Brie held in her hands evident proof of everything her father had left for her. “The funds are secured by fingerprint security. Your fingerprints.” Her mother remained aloof, distant as she explained how to obtain the incredible inheritance left to her. Brie didn’t know what her intentions were and fell back into a comfortable defence against the woman now sitting with perfect posture at Max’s childhood desk.
“I don’t understand. Why now? Why are you doing this now?” She heard the snap in her voice and her mother’s registered surprise but pushed the unwanted guilt so far back she almost couldn’t hear it.
“I know what you think of me, Brie. And that is a fair assumption...”
“It’s not an assumption Mother, when it’s true.” She watched as her mother took in a deep breath, a look of saddened understanding falling into place.
“I don’t know how much you know about my childhood, but I grew up on an isolated farm, my mother’s cousin’s farm. My mother had dropped me off when I was five at the end of the driveway and left me there because she had had another child. I was the one who had to knock on his door and tell him my mother didn’t want me anymore. He raised me the best he could, but it was with a hard hand and completely loveless. When I met your father, oh but I was so in love with than man! He was charming and charismatic, your Max reminds me a lot of him. He turned my life upside down and inside out with one smile. And he wanted children and I did, eventually. But I knew, with his heart, once we had a child, I was afraid that I would be replaced, left out in the cold. I let my own fears and jealousy get in the way of being the mother your father wanted me to be. And because of that, your father felt he had to make up for my actions which only spurned my own insecurities higher. I didn’t know any better, I never had a mother or a father or a warm, loving home. When your father died, every part of me died with him. He was my lifeline, my rock. He pulled me from the darkest nightmare and thrust me into a life full of light and laughter. But when he passed, I felt like he took it all with him. You are so much like him Brie, unbelievably actually. I realize you think I harbour this anger toward you about the money he left you...”
“You don’t?” Brie finally managed to ask as she sat there stunned. She couldn’t ever remember a time her and her mother had said more than five words to each other.
“It was my idea, Brie. It was never about the money for me. It was about the man. And a misguided direction of my own faults. I want you to have everything you ever hoped for, everything he ever hoped for you.”
“Why are you telling me all this now? Why not before, when we could have tried to work on our relationship, when we could have tried to build something?” Brie’s eyes were clouding with tears, a slow simmering, resentful anger burning inside of her toward the woman who left her alone for so many years.
“I was going through a box of your father’s things the other day, as I usually do. I found a letter he wrote me when he first asked for my hand. I had forgotten the good in the wake of the bad.” She watched as she stood from the chair and moved toward the door, her slim fingers gripping the cold metal handle. “I truly hope you are happy, Brie. I wish only the best for you and that baby.”
“Mom?” she said suddenly as the door opened. Tired, aged eyes met hers and she could finally see the sadness her mother had always perfectly hid behind a mask.
“I miss him too,” she whispered. With a nod of her head, her mother left her staring after her, alone. Tearing her eyes away from the door and back down to the paper still in her hands, she couldn’t wrap her head around everything her mother just confessed, feeling like they had somehow taken both a step forward and two steps back all at the same time. She desperately wanted her mother to be excited for her, for her grandchild, but she had made it clear that even with her confession, she still held a resentment that outweighed anything else. She knew, even more so now, the love her mother had for her father, it was the love that was missing for her that left her heart feeling heavy, too weighted in her chest. She suddenly felt this house and every childhood memory it carried, so full of love and laughter, taunting her with the knowledge that hers wasn’t. She folded the papers she was holding back into the envelope with shaking fingers. Distantly she heard the party still alive beyond the buzzing in her ears and she knew she couldn’t go back to enjoy it. Max’s voice echoed, reminding her to stay until he came to get her but she had to get out of there, the walls slowly closing in on her, suffocating the joy she had felt before her mother sat down to confessional. Pushing herself off the bed, she padded down the stairs and ran into Roxy.
“Hey! I was just looking for you, Zoe and Rachel just left and your mom before them, they were wanting to say goodbye.”
“Sorry,” Brie was able to murmur.
“What’s wrong? You actually don’t look very well, do you need to sit down, are you feeling okay?” Brie wanted to smile at the protective shield Roxy always managed to throw around her.
“I just need some fresh air, Rox. The party has been am
azing, just a little overwhelming I think. I’ll be just a few minutes.”
“Do you want some company?” she asked with concerned eyes.
“No, I’ll be okay, thanks.” After sweeping her friend into a swift, hard hug, Brie moved for the door and embraced the cold air that immediately swept through her hair. She felt numb staring out onto the bleak snow covered landscape. She could almost feel the papers she had shoved into her jacket pocket burning a hole in her side. Looking out she could see her car, the last in the lineup on the long driveway. Without considering it further, she found herself moving down the steps and toward the vehicle, her fingers gripping the keys that provided her escape. Climbing in, she rested her forehead against the steering wheel as she gathered her emotions in one deep breath. Sitting up with her shoulders back, she started the car and placed it in reverse, ignoring the echo of Max’s voice warning her against it.
Chapter Seventeen
Brie pulled her car into the parking lot of her building. Looking up to the sky, the sun was starting to fade into the dark of the night but just the car ride alone had allowed her to think, to pull herself together and start forming a plan. If her mother didn’t want to be a part of her life or her baby’s life, well, that was her loss, she continued to repeat to herself.
Lord, she was tired.
She needed one of Max’s famous feet rubs. Pulling out her phone she knew she needed to tell him she went to her apartment first and she would meet him at the house. She knew he was in an important meeting and she didn’t want to rush him by making him come to her apartment with her. She was a big girl, she could handle it on her own. Even the lashing she knew she would probably get because she had gone against him. He would understand.
Hopefully.
Getting out of her car, she wrapped her coat tighter around her. Moving to the sidewalk she could see the streets were already starting to grow with the excitement of what a Saturday night promised. She noticed the man leaning against the side of her building¸ a cigarette between his fingers. She could feel his eyes on her and as she moved past him he pushed away from the cold brick and followed in her path. Glancing behind her, she saw the man about ten feet behind her, a calculated smile curving at his mouth while his eyes never strayed from her. Quickly turning around, she continued to force her feet in front of her, praying the terror that was coursing through her body didn’t render her helpless. Not daring to look back again, Brie felt the shiver run down her neck, her throat swelling with nerves. Picking up the pace she could hear his footsteps closing in behind her, the stench of his cigarette in the air. Recalling the flash of his face as she walked past, there was something about him that was familiar.
And then she remembered.
A dark pair of cold, lifeless eyes flooded her memory. The aged man she had run into outside of her building. Instinctively she knew she was being followed. She felt the panic claw at her throat as she dialed Max with shaky fingers. Listening to the first ring, she prayed he answered her call.
“Hey, baby.”
“Max,” she whispered frantically.
“What’s wrong?” he demanded. She could hear him moving on the other end, the concern in his voice sending her emotions into overdrive.
“Max, I’m being followed.” Seeing the group of people up ahead she moved her feet faster until she was almost running, hoping to disappear within them.
“Where are you?” he roared. She wanted to close her eyes against the anger and the panic that laced every word. Looking up she listed off the name of the cafe and the bookstore she was passing and listened while he repeated them out loud. Instantly Max’ voice was replaced by another.
“Brie, its Aiden. Listen, there is going to be a bar that you are going to be coming up to - it’s called Pete’s.”
“I see it,” she told him, hearing the tremor in her voice.
“Okay, good girl. My friend Pete owns it. I want you to go inside and tell Pete that Aiden sent you. That’s all you need to say, okay?”
“There’s a line up,” she breathed. She could hear Max issuing orders in the background, her fingers gripping her phone so tightly that she was surprised it was breaking. She lost the sound of the man’s footsteps behind her as the noise from the boisterous crowd of people overshadowed it.
“That’s okay. Walk up to the bouncer with the tattoos. His name is Mark. You can tell him the same thing.” She did as she was told and sought out the bouncer with the tattoos.
“Hello gorgeous, how can I help you?” His kind smile did nothing to ease the terror that was coursing through her.
“Aiden sent me,” she told him quickly. Instantly his smile faded into a fierce frown as he pulled her close to him, his eyes scanning the crowd for any threats. Refusing to let go of her arm he quickly took her inside the warmth of the bar.
“Pete,” he called to the bartender. His voice boomed, quickly alerting the good looking man who was laughing as he handed over a freshly poured beer. He looked from the bouncer to her and back. “Aiden sent her.”
“My office.”
The bouncer led her through the bar and toward the back where they disappeared down a hallway and into a room that was clearly some sort of office, safe room combination. He sat her down gently on the couch as Pete followed closely behind. Brie couldn’t hear anything other than the roaring in her ears. Her hand immediately moved to the pain in her stomach. Closing her eyes she breathed through the hurt that felt like a hot lance through her belly.
Damn it! Why didn’t she just listen to Max?
“Hi honey. I’m Pete,” he introduced himself, crouching down in front of her. His smile was warm as he reached out and she flinched when he took her phone from her hand, bringing it up to his ear. She had forgotten she was holding it. “Aiden.” She watched as he nodded his head silently, listening intently. “Okay, she’s safe. We’ll see you soon.” She accepted the bottle of water Mark the bouncer handed her. “Mark is going to stay in here with you. Aiden and Max are on their way.” She nodded her head silently, acknowledging what he said. He covered her cold hand with his. “Brie, you’re safe now. We’re not going to let anything happen to you.”
“Thank you,” she implored. Pete left her alone with Mark who moved away from the door only to offer her a blanket.
“So does this happen often?” she asked into the silence. She couldn’t stand the quiet anymore, it was eating away at her mind, filling her head with ideas that she knew would haunt her nightmares. “Errant girlfriends who get themselves into trouble?” Only then when he laughed did she see the gun in his hand.
“I wouldn’t say often. Maybe once or twice.”
“Enough that this room seems impenetrable.”
“And soundproof,” he told her with a wink.
“Does Pete require all his bouncers to carry a gun?”
“No.” The knowing smile never left his face as he ended her line of questioning with one word. She had a feeling Mark wasn’t just a bouncer.
Less than ten minutes later he opened the door on a knock and in burst Max followed by his two brothers. His eyes immediately sought her out, ensuring she was okay. She could see the rage sparking in his eyes and she knew part of it was directed at her.
“God damn it, Brie! I told you to stay at my parents!” he yelled. Before she had a chance to explain Nate interrupted.
“Max, yelling at her isn’t doing anyone any good right now. We have to get back to the Barn. Now.” Turning to face her, Max’s brother looked at her with pity in his eyes. “Are you okay, sweetheart?” She nodded her head with an appreciative smile.
“Nate, go with Aiden. We’ll meet you back at the Barn.”
“Max, we need to go now.”
“We’re coming! Just do as I’m fucking telling you,” he growled, never taking his eyes off of her. Brie listened to the snick of the door as the two of them were left alone in a room full of tension. Pushing the blanket off of her she stood up needing to try to explain. She hated the fury she saw wri
tten all over his face.
“I’m sorry,” she started in a whisper. “I just... I thought...” she shook her head trailing off not knowing what to say to make it better. He reached out and cupped her face, slamming his lips down on hers. Before she could respond he jerked away from her.
“I. Will. Not. Lose. You.” The ferocity in his eyes kept her speechless. “I don’t tell you to do things because I’m trying to control you or keep you on a leash or whatever other bullshit you think I’m doing. I tell you to do things to keep you safe, Brie. I need you safe. Those guys are fucking dangerous. God damn it, there is a fucking bounty on my head, Brie. They will use anyone, anyone to get to me. And you are the one person that can break me. If I lose you, especially to this bullshit... that would incinerate me. Do you understand that?” Brie knew her eyes were gaining moisture throughout his impassioned speech. Searching his eyes she nodded her head. Leaning in he rested his forehead against hers as he took a deep breath.