‘I won’t do anything to hurt her,’ I said.
‘This won’t hurt her. It’s a tracker. It will send her back to our present before she manages to finish what she’s doing. All new echo jumps have been suspended so she won’t be able to go back again.’
‘You promise?’ I said.
‘Eddie, darling, I’m not a monster.’ She raised her hand to my cheek and I felt so many emotions that I could barely distinguish what was what, except that this host body, inside which I was hiding, would have done anything for this woman. ‘You can’t go yourself. They’re watching us. You need to find someone you trust.’
‘I’m not sure I trust anyone any more.’
‘Find someone to help us. Someone not involved. Someone you can manipulate. Do it quickly or we’ll lose everything we’ve worked for.’
In my mind’s eye, I pictured Angus. Yes, I heard myself think, I’ll get Angus to do it.
The End of the World
There was no rushing wind or lurching sensation in my stomach, but it did feel as helpless and hopeless as falling. Days passed like seconds. All my lives flashed before my ever-changing eyes, hinting at all the possibilities and impossibilities of every decision. I caught glimpses of how my life would have been with a mother. Her expectations. Her disappointment. My desire to please her. My unconditional love for her, no matter what she did or what she asked me to do.
I saw Ruby refusing to admit she was growing old until her fingers could no longer grip a paintbrush. I saw her alone, unable to look after herself. I saw her screaming and crying when I came to take her from her home. I wrestled with her and pushed back my emotions.
I saw Scarlett, young and old, happy and sad, angry and disappointed, laughing uncontrollably and weeping inconsolably. I couldn’t make sense of it all but what I did understand was so painful that I was relieved when it stopped and I found myself standing in a crowded room, once again tucked away at the back of my mind.
At the front of the room, behind a small stage, was a logo with an arrow curving around to form a globe with the letters ETA written below. A man in a grey suit stood onstage, urging everyone to sit down. I found a seat. The man next to me was fiddling with his watch.
‘Another day, another announcement from the ETA,’ he said. He pressed a button on his watch and it projected various computer icons above his wrist. ‘Blasted thing. Never works when I need it.’ He switched it off and took out a pad and pen. ‘Much easier,’ he said.
I waited to hear my reply but none came.
At the back of the room, cameramen and journalists jostled for position. ‘Any idea what this one’s about?’ asked the man next to me.
‘I have my suspicions,’ I said.
The man turned to look at me. ‘Hey, don’t I recognise you?’
‘Look, it’s starting now,’ I said.
The man onstage tapped the microphone on the lectern and spoke. ‘Ladies and gentlemen of the press, please welcome Senior Echo Time Agent, Lauren Bliss.’
Scarlett walked out onto the stage, exuding confidence and authority. She was blond and she looked older, but no less striking in a blue uniform with the same logo of the curved arrow.
‘Ladies and gentlemen of the press, thank you for coming.’
The room fell quiet. ‘I know many of you will be pressed for time,’ she began.
‘Unlike you lot,’ shouted a journalist at the back, winning a small half-hearted pocket of laughter.
‘There will be an opportunity for questions and attempts at humour at the end,’ said Scarlett, getting a much better response. ‘This announcement concerns the planned action following the decision to eradicate all remaining altered versions.’
An excited murmur spread through the room.
‘About time too,’ the man next to me muttered.
‘It is not a decision we at the ETA take lightly,’ said Scarlett. ‘The consequences of what we are about to do will have ramifications far beyond this version of existence.’
‘In English, please,’ shouted the loud-mouthed journalist at the back.
‘She’s talking about the end of the world,’ responded another.
Scarlett smiled. ‘In spite of your glib tabloid summary, you’re not far off. We are talking about the end of all altered versions of existence,’ she said. ‘As you know, it has been law for well over a decade that all new versions created for whatever reason must be destroyed after use. However, this new decision requires us to go back and delete all versions created before this law.’
‘Good thing too,’ said the man next to me. From the mutterings of approval, this appeared to be the sentiment of most of the room.
‘That’s right,’ said a snooty-sounding woman at the side of the room. ‘Professor Maguire’s own report warned of dangers of temporal erosion caused by the existence of too many timelines.’
‘The report cited this as a possibility, not a reality. But, whatever the truth of the dangers, it has been decided it is not a risk worth taking, so the ETA will now embark on a series of investigations to determine which versions have been altered and which is the originating version.’
‘So, the end of the world, then,’ yelled the same journalist as before.
Scarlett had to fight to regain the attention of the room. ‘It is for this very reason that Professor David Maguire has resigned his post as chief adviser to the ETA.’
‘What about the rumours that Maguire has created his own personal altered version with no Melody Dane?’ said the snooty journalist.
‘I cannot comment on ongoing cases and investigations within the ETA,’ said Scarlett. ‘Nor am I here to answer for Professor Maguire.’
‘Will he be holding a press conference too?’ yelled another voice.
‘As soon as Professor Maguire is located, the ETA will be issuing a statement.’
Given the strong reaction this got, it was odd that my own mind was extremely calm. Apparently I was not surprised by anything I had heard so far.
‘He’s gone missing?’ said the man next to me.
‘Run away, has he?’ shouted loud mouth.
‘I am unable to comment on Professor Maguire’s whereabouts at this time. All I can tell you is that, as an outspoken critic of this policy, he has found his own position as chief advisor to the ETA untenable and so has stepped down.’
‘And run off to hide in a world where he can get what he wants,’ said the snooty woman.
‘The consequence of this policy will make it impossible for anyone to hide in altered versions,’ said Scarlett.
‘In English, please.’
‘It’s the end of every world except one,’ she replied, for the first time catching my eye.
Final Chips
Seeing Scarlett’s face so near to mine, it took me a moment to take in our surroundings. The clatter of the cutlery and the smell of the food brought me to my senses. I looked down at the plate of chips on my tray. On a nearby table, a group of girls pretended not to watch us. We were back in the school hall. Everything was as before except, this time, Scarlett had chips. She picked one up, dipped it in ketchup and took a bite.
‘It’s all right to speak,’ she said.
‘To say what?’ I replied.
‘You have every reason to be upset,’ she said. ‘I can’t imagine what you’ve been through.’
‘Which version are we in now?’ I asked.
‘This is a temporary moment that will be destroyed as soon as we leave. You’ve been stabilised now. It’s almost over.’
‘What happened to me?’
‘You were echo freefalling,’ said Scarlett. ‘You heard the announcement, didn’t you?’
‘The one that told me I was dead and to remain calm?’ I said.
‘Yes,’ she replied. ‘It turns out that blue Smartie was nastier than I thought. It did locate your originating point but it didn’t send you back. It sent you into cardiac arrest. It killed your originating self.’
‘So I’m dead?’
>
‘Dead men don’t eat chips, Eddie, but it was touch and go for a while. Luckily for you, your originating self came from an altered version that was created by Cornish’s illegal echo jump.’
‘What?’
‘Don’t hurt yourself trying to understand. Just know that in spite of your best efforts, you are still alive.’
‘But I told Angus to give the Smartie to you.’
‘Did you know what it would do?’
‘No, I don’t think so. Maybe. I’m not sure. I was trying to protect Melody.’ I paused and looked down at the blob of ketchup on my plate. ‘Scarlett, am I the bad guy?’
She took my hand. ‘It doesn’t matter. You’re going to make up for all this. This you is going to make things right.’
‘I want to see Ruby.’
‘You’ll see her soon.’
‘I want to go home.’
‘The whole world is going home now. We’re starting again.’ She picked up another chip. ‘You know, I wish I’d gone for chips the first time. Most field agents pig out when they echo jump, but I had this crazy idea that I should try to stay healthy. Stupid really.’
‘I don’t get it,’ I said. ‘Has everything I’ve just seen already happened?’
‘It had, but it won’t have soon. All those futures are being destroyed and all those pasts are being tidied up.’
‘So everything will make sense?’
‘I don’t think you can assume that. Things don’t make sense. Not really. The world isn’t fair. You can try all you like to make it so but someone will always find a loophole. Even now that they want to clean everything up, I doubt it will stay like that.’
‘How many versions are there left?’
‘Two, and it’s time to call the final witness. You.’
‘Why me? What have I witnessed?’
‘I need you to do one last jump back to the first point of divergence.’
‘Melody’s death,’ I said.
Scarlett nodded. ‘That’s where all these investigations have led. Maguire stands on trial for her murder. We need your testimony.’
‘Why me?’
‘Because you were there, Eddie. You can’t remember it but you witnessed Melody’s death. If we sent anyone else back, their presence would be too likely to affect the outcome.’
‘Can’t you just hypnotise me to remember?’
‘No. We need to be sure. Believe me, this was my last resort. Sending you back that far is not without its dangers. You’ll be entering your infant mind, opening up the danger of overworking it and causing mental damage. You’ll also be reliving a memory you have suppressed for a very good reason.’
‘Will I be able to speak?’
‘No, your vocal cords won’t be developed enough. Even if you could, a talking baby would be enough to make anyone crash a car.’ Scarlett’s smile was the emptiest I had ever seen it.
‘So what can I do?’
‘Listen and watch.’
Scarlett placed her hand on top of my mine. The group of girls giggled but, at that moment, I could not have cared less. ‘So no one will remember this,’ I said.
‘That’s right,’ she replied.
I leaned over the table and kissed her. Her lips were so soft that it felt as though the world was melting.
Then it did.
Thurseaber
I entered a memory from before I knew what memory was. I was shuffling and struggling. My mind was awash with confused, wordless emotions. It was dark and something was hurting my shoulders. My mother stood over me. She looked like she did in the photograph, although I knew her more by smell than sight. She finished fiddling with the two strong straps holding me down and I felt the buckle pinch my thigh. When I cried out in pain, I heard the shrill shriek of a baby.
‘Look, I’m sorry, darling,’ said my mother, ‘but if you didn’t make such a fuss, you wouldn’t get hurt, would you?’
‘Where are you taking him?’ Ruby was standing behind my mother. The rain came down hard on her uncovered head.
‘Go back inside, woman,’ said Melody.
‘At least wait until it stops raining. It’s not safe to drive in this.’
‘He’s safer with me than with you,’ replied Melody.
‘You’re overreacting. Everyone leaves their door unlocked around here.’
‘Not when they’re supposed to be looking after their grandson. You had that music up so loud you couldn’t even hear him crying.’
‘I can hear him crying now,’ said Ruby pointedly. ‘You’ll only be back. You need my help. You never have any time for the lad.’
‘I wouldn’t expect you to understand,’ yelled Melody. ‘David and I are working on something very important.
‘More important than your child?’
‘The child has nothing to do with David. He’s mine. Do you understand? Mine.’
‘The child has a name,’ said Ruby.
Melody slammed the car door shut so I couldn’t hear what was said, then she got into the driver’s seat and turned the key. She tried the seatbelt but it didn’t come, so she gave up and put the car into gear. I had to warn her.
‘Thurseaber,’ I managed to say. My tongue felt swollen and oversized in my infant mouth.
‘Don’t worry, darling. Everything’s going to be all right.’
Out of the window I could see Ruby standing in the doorway. The rain on the car roof sounded like thunder. The car moved and I felt a wave of drowsiness. I fought to stay awake. ‘Thurseaber, thurseaber,’ I muttered.
‘Quiet down now, darling.’
She leaned over and fumbled with her bag, causing the car to swerve. She got it back under control and pulled out her mobile phone. With her left thumb, she dialled a number, then clicked it on to speaker phone.
‘Hello?’ It was Maguire’s voice. ‘Melody? Where are you? What’s wrong?’
‘I’m driving,’ she replied. ‘I’m leaving.’
‘Come on, don’t get like this over a little argument.’
‘You called me an unfit mother.’
‘I didn’t mean it like that. It was you who said the baby was getting in the way of our work.’
‘THURSEABER,’ I screamed.
‘Please, darling, give it a rest,’ yelled Melody.
‘What’s going on?’ said Maguire. ‘Are you driving?’
‘It’s not your concern.’
‘It is my car, though, isn’t it? You shouldn’t be driving in weather like this. Please, come round and we can talk about it.’
‘There’s nothing to talk about. We’re leaving. We’re getting out of this godforsaken place. I’m going to start over.’
‘And throw away everything we’re trying to do?’ said Maguire.
‘I wouldn’t be throwing away anything. I am perfectly capable of completing the project with or without you.’
‘I’ve given up everything for this,’ said Maguire.
‘So have I.’
‘What did you have to give up?’
‘Goodbye, David.’
My mother only looked down to disconnect the call but it was long enough. We had reached the corner. I felt the skid of the wheel. I heard screaming, although I don’t know whether it was her, me, or the sound of the brakes. As the car flew off the road, my mother shot out of her seat and went straight through the windscreen. I felt moisture splatter my skin but I didn’t know if it was blood or rain.
The Testimony of Mr Edward Dane
‘The court will now hear the testimony of Mr Edward Dane.’
The judge sat up high in the courtroom. Scarlett was standing in front of me, wearing the same uniform as before. My mother was next to a man I didn’t recognise. Maguire was in another box across the room from me. The rest of the large room was filled with people. Most were strangers but some were familiar from the press conference. Everyone looked older than before.
‘Are you ready to testify, Eddie?’ asked Scarlett.
‘What?’ I replied.
‘The witness seems a bit disorientated,’ said the judge.
‘With respect, your honour,’ said Scarlett, ‘Eddie has been echo freefalling since the death of his originating self. As well as seeing countless glimpses of his own future, he has just sat helplessly and watched his mother’s death. It would be more surprising if he were not disorientated.’
‘Is that correct, Mr Dane?’ said the judge. ‘Did you just witness the death of Melody Dane?’
I nodded.
‘Let the record show that the witness nodded,’ said the judge.
‘Please, in your own time, Eddie, tell us what you saw,’ said Scarlett.
‘It was raining,’ I said. ‘My mother was arguing with Ruby.’
‘You’re referring to Ruby Dane, your grandmother?’ said Scarlett.
‘She doesn’t like the G-word,’ I said.
‘What were they arguing about?’ asked the judge.
‘Ruby had left the door unlocked while she was looking after me or something.’
‘May I ask the relevance of this?’ said the man next to my mother.
‘I think we all want as clear a view of the events as possible,’ said the judge, ‘so please hold back any questions until the end of the testimony.’ He turned back to me. ‘Please continue, but bear in mind that you are under oath and that the consequences of your testimony will have serious ramifications … for everyone.’
I looked at my mother, trying to read her expression. Something lurked behind her eyes but I couldn’t tell if it was fear, anger or something else. All my life, she had been nothing more than an echo of a whispered word. In reality she was much more complex than that, so much darker and brighter than I could have ever imagined.
‘Maguire is innocent,’ I said. ‘He didn’t kill her. It was an accident. Melody made a phone call while driving without a seatbelt. That’s why she died.’
The courtroom fell quiet except for Melody who was urgently whispering to the man next to her.
‘Melody, I understand,’ I said. ‘I always felt cheated too. I felt wronged. I wanted someone to blame but it was just a stupid accident. It was nothing.’
No True Echo Page 16