“Then where does Ashley come into play?” She tapped the glass with her short nail.
“I was on a downward spiral and she got pregnant.”
“Sounds familiar.” She lowered her gaze.
“Two completely different scenarios, sweetheart. I used a condom with her and she was on the pill…until she decided to quit taking it.”
“Am I to believe you’re ready to settle down?”
“With the right woman, yes.”
“Where’s the line then?”
“Line?”
“The line of single women looking for a cowboy such as yourself. There’s a line somewhere. I’m sure of it.” She looked over her shoulder.
He snorted and met her gaze, and not smiling. “The only one I see is you.”
“I’m not that same woman that I was when you knew me. I’ve learned from the hard knocks.”
The waitress brought his beer and he drank half of it in one gulp. “The thing about hindsight, we never know what we have until it’s gone.” His blue gaze held hers for three heartbeats.
Silence fell between them like a comfortable blanket.
She took another sip of her wine and looked up to find his gaze still on her. Placing her glass on the table, she sighed. “What are we doing here, Wes?”
“We’re having dinner. Why haven’t you settled down? You’re a beautiful, smart, engaging woman. A catch in most men’s standards.”
She swallowed. “I-I just haven’t been in the mindset to settle down.”
“Did the event with Logan keep you from happiness?” His gaze burrowed into her.
“I’m not unhappy.”
“Really? Your eyes tell me a different story. I know you, whether you choose to admit it or not. Dreams don’t just fizzle and disappear, even if we push them as far away as possible. Just like you say you want children, but I know you also want a lover, a confidant, someone who understands you.”
She chuckled. “Those conversations we had under the moon in the back of your truck are just that, conversations. We all have dreams and some don’t pan out the way we’d like,” she replied too defensively.
“Shrug those dreams off as merely conversations all you want, but why are you running from the truth? Don’t chalk all your dreams up to small talk.”
“I was hurt and lost when I left Colton, but it’s not the memory of Logan’s drunken outrage that lingers. It was you who truly kept me away, Wes. For me to be near you, I knew I needed to tell you the truth and hurting you was something I wanted to prevent…and seeing pity in your eyes when you look at me. I don’t want that from you. I had many things I wanted to do at Tanner Ranch. I lost a lot of things by keeping a secret.”
“Consider staying. Consider doing all those important things now.”
“What if I fail at the ranch business? I know some, but there’s so much I am unsure about.”
“Sweetheart, I guarantee you that you won’t fail. I’m here and if it takes every breath I have in my body, we’ll get Tanner back on its own two feet.”
“How can you make promises like that?”
“Because I want you to marry me. We’ll have that child you want.”
*****
“What?” Sammie looked like she’d hit an unforeseen force.
“You heard me right, darlin’. Let’s get married. There’s nothing keeping us apart now.” He could see the truth flickering in her baby blues. He wasn’t sure why that made him happy, but he had a good idea. He wanted her to stay. Over the years, he would have given anything to have her here, and now that she was he couldn’t imagine her leaving again.
He watched her closely as she reached for her wine glass and sipped the dark liquid.
This was his opportunity for a chance with her, and although up until this very moment he hadn’t settled himself into believing it possible. But he’d thrown caution to the wind and took that second chance. He wasn’t about to blow the chance of a lifetime.
“So, you brought me here to talk me into staying.”
“No, not really it’s just heading in that direction.
She played with the stem of her glass. “And what a path it is. I don’t think you thought about that proposal before you asked.”
“Does a man always have to plan every move?”
The corner of her mouth trembled. “When it comes to marriage and family, yes, he should.”
“I’d like to pick up where we left off. Tell me you don’t.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
“I’m sorry. I’m shocked. Am I hearing you right?” Sammie stared.
“You heard right. I just think ignoring the attraction is a waste of time.”
“You certainly are full of surprises this evening. What turned out as old friends getting together has turned into an offer for a lifetime commitment.”
“The whole kit and caboodle.”
She widened her eyes and batted her lashes. “You can’t be so hard up, can you?”
“Darlin’, I’m hard, but not desperate. What I see is a second chance between us, and I’m not afraid to say so.”
“I’m caught off guard.” She grabbed the edge of the table so tightly he could see her knuckles were white.
“You’ve said that.”
“What more can I say?”
“There’s something you probably don’t know, sweetheart, but I had bought you a ring. I planned to give it to you, but you left.”
She blinked. “A ring? You were going to propose to me?”
He nodded. “Yes. I thought we wanted the same things.”
“I’m so sorry, Wes. How can you forgive me for leaving? Honestly, if the tables turned, I’m not sure I could so easily.”
“Trust me, it wasn’t easy and I didn’t forgive until you told me why you had left. I should be asking for forgiveness because I was an idiot who didn’t chase after the best thing in my life.” He gave her a slow smile. “Aren’t you the least bit curious?”
“About us? Sure. I won’t deny that, but my plans of leaving haven’t changed. This is a complicated situation. We live in two different worlds now. You’re asking me to uproot my life, move here, take a risk. How do we even know that we’re…well, compatible any longer?”
He lifted a brow. “You’ve always triggered something in me.”
“Always? You didn’t notice me until I came back from college.” She smiled.
“I noticed you before, but keep in mind, there’s five years between us. You were practically a baby when I started the rodeo.”
She blinked. “I’m certainly not a baby any longer.”
“No, you’re not.” He whistled through his teeth.
Her cheeks turned pink. “This all feels like a practical joke.”
“I wouldn’t joke about something like this. I’m only saying it like I see, like I feel.”
Her mouth flirted with a smile. “I think I remember you always saying things just like they are. I always found that admiral.”
“Well then, you shouldn’t haven’t any doubts about my intentions. Colton isn’t so bad. And can you deny the attraction between us? I’d say it’d be much easier to go with the flow instead of fighting the feeling.”
“As much as I don’t want to admit it, you do make a very good point. Things have been a bit awkward between us. Is it because of our unfinished story or because you feel an obligation after I told you about the baby and Logan? I didn’t tell you because I was fishing for a proposal.”
He smiled. “Learning about the baby, and what you dealt with, only made me realize that I should have gone after you, told you how I felt.”
“That was years ago, and we’re not the same people. We can’t do this because the moment we do, everything turns muddled and messy, and we don’t need messy. We both have a lot going on in our lives that is making us lonely and loneliness makes everyone, and every situation, looked more attractive. I no longer belong in Colton and I certainly don’t want a man to want to marry me because he thinks he owes m
e in some way.”
“Have your way, sweetheart. Are you ready?” He started to rise.
“Wes?”
He dropped back into his chair, meeting her gaze. He couldn’t quite read her expression. He muttered a curse under his breath and rubbed his chin. “You’ve made yourself clear.”
She took one last sip from her wine glass, nodded, and stood. He paid the bill and they retraced their steps to his truck, both subdued in their thoughts. Once she was inside, he made his way to the driver’s side and climbed in. He wasn’t sure how he’d manage to stay an arm’s length from her, but if it damn near killed him, he wouldn’t pressure her. The last thing he wanted was to push her away—push her back to Chicago.
They were quiet and once he dropped her off, he watched her walk to the front door and waited until she was safely inside.
What had he been thinking?
Thinking with the wrongs parts was his problem.
Overcome with emotions, he wanted to drag her into his arms and make her his again. He couldn’t fathom that she didn’t want the same things, which made him a jackass.
Years ago, he’d fallen in love with her, had plans for a future with her, and she’d walked away and he’d allowed her to. He’d wanted to make it up to her now, before it was too late, but she’d put on the stop light.
They’d changed over the time apart. Older and wiser, he was proof they could still make mistakes. Why did he have to go and make things harder and more awkward by coming out and asking her to marry him, and such a romantic proposal it was. Damn, he was a stupid man.
Hell, no wonder she thought he was asking out of some sort of obligation. When a man asked a woman to be his wife, he should have the decency to have a ring at least.
Truth was, he’d had no plans of asking her, not tonight and no thought for the future, but the words came at their own will. He still loved her and he wanted to see her, have the right to hold and kiss her, caress her beautiful body. He wanted to pretend they didn’t have a mound of baggage looming between them like a black cloud. Guess he was completely off the mark.
He ached to taste her lips. His body hankered to have her in his arms so he could prove that he could still take her to multiple orgasms. Beyond those feelings, he wanted to put a ring on her finger, give her the child she wanted…hell, that he wanted with her.
He still wanted all these things, but pressuring her wasn’t in his blood. He had to have patience, understanding, and allow her to figure out what she wanted. He had a feeling that things would turn around soon, and if they did, she’d have to want to be here with him, and with Brie.
*****
Sammie wasn’t sure how to explain her feelings after Wes dropped her off at home. The ride had been quiet and she’d felt a sudden disconnect. What had she expected? She’d turned him down flat after he’d made a very good argument of why they should marry. She’d done what was right. Or had she? Why did her body disagree? Thinking that she could be with Wes, in his arms, made her a loaded pistol.
She hadn’t come back to Texas with visions of falling back into the cowboy’s arms, and not marriage. How could she be sure that he didn’t ask out of guilt?
She woke up early the next morning, right at dawn. Her body was adjusting to the early mornings. Or it was the rain pounding her window that awoke her? Possibly because she couldn’t wait to get out on the land and see…
Wes.
She missed him.
After dressing, she made her way downstairs and, as usual, Bessie was finishing breakfast. Surprisingly, Lucas was sitting at the table. She started to back out when Bessie waved her in. “Come on, young lady. No chance you’re getting out of this house without breakfast. I won’t hear any different.”
Sammie had no choice but to suck it up and continue into the kitchen. Taking her place at the table, she looked down the polished surface to her dad who had his attention on the local paper.
She cleared her throat. “I’m glad to see that you’re up early and ready for your doctor’s appointment.” All through her childhood he’d been awake at first light, but as he aged, she noticed he was slower.
He pushed the newspaper aside. “I thought we’d have breakfast together.”
She blinked. Had she heard him right? “You and me?”
“Here’s your breakfast, sweet thing.” Bessie placed the plate in front of Sammie and wiped her hands off on her apron. “No meat, just as you like. I have some cleaning to do so you two enjoy your breakfast.” She gave Sammie an encouraging smile before sweeping from the room, humming enthusiastically.
“If you don’t mind having breakfast with me, that is.”
“Of course not, daddy. I-I…well, I didn’t see this coming.”
“Just so you know, I’m glad your back, even if it’s only temporary.” He picked up his fork. “Now eat while it’s hot.” He dug into his eggs.
Not much of a breakfast person, she was surprised she’d finished everything on her plate. Although she and her father had eaten in silence, it was a comfortable one so when she grabbed the umbrella and headed outdoors, she felt a sense of relief. The rain was still coming down hard and she had to wade through mud puddles to the barn. The barn cat met her and was meowing for breakfast. She gave him a can of moist cat food. Unlike the other mornings, Wes wasn’t waiting for her. She saw Braise and waved him down.
“Morning, Sammie.”
“Is Wes around?
“He said he wouldn’t be around until later today. He had business to tend to.”
Her shoulders slumped. Why didn’t he tell her? Maybe he did and she missed it. Reaching for her phone from her back pocket, she searched her messages. No messages. Disappointment slithered through her. She was just assuming he’d be here this morning helping her with the horses and going over business.
Back in the barn, she fed and watered the horses, gave them fresh hay, and then wasn’t sure what to do with herself. The rain was still pouring down and most of the hands were hanging out in the staff quarters until it passed and then they would start on the chores.
Sweating and muddy, she headed back to the house and toed her boots off on the porch and stepped into the house, grabbed a bottle of water and drank half of it in one gulp. Good thing no one was around to see her because she’d lost some of it on her shirt. Bessie was gone for the day and her dad left an hour ago for his doctor’s appointment. Sammie was surprised he hadn’t put up a fuss.
Peeling off her soaked shirt and jeans, along with her damp undergarments, she tossed them into the washer in the mud room along with a few towels. Because the washer running made so much noise, she had no idea she was no longer alone in the house, so when she stepped out to find Wes standing in the middle of the kitchen, she let out a squeal.
“I knocked, but no one answered. I saw you walk in.” His gaze slipped over her in admiration and her nipples hardened in excitement.
Covering herself with arms over her breasts, there was nothing she could do to hide her lower half. “I-I was doing a load of laundry. I didn’t hear you come in.” Warmth spread from her roots to her toes.
“I gathered as much.” One corner of his mouth lifted triumphantly.
“You came to see me?”
“Business. Should I come back?”
“No, wait here. I’ll go get dressed and be right back down.” She creeped toward the door, facing him, and hit the doorframe with a thwack. She laughed nervously. “I didn’t see it there.” Once she was out of his sight, she made a mad dash upstairs and into her bedroom. Grabbing bra and panties, she slid into them, then a pair of jeans from her drawer, wiggling into the denim. She reached for the first shirt she came to and dragged it on. Racing to her vanity she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. “Oh, holy cannoli!” Her hair was a tangled mess around her flushed cheeks. There was nothing she could do for it now except pile it all into a messy bun. With shaky hands, she applied a light coat of makeup, then pulled the top off her deodorant can and the cap went flying a
cross the room, hitting the wall. She’d have to find it later. Spraying her arm pits liberally, she sniffed and was glad the baby powder scent masked the smell of horses. For added measure, she spritzed her neck. The last thing she wanted was to face Wes smelling like wet dog, or wet cow which was worse. That wouldn’t be an attraction for even a cowboy who worked around manure every day.
T-shirt on, jeans snapped and zipped, she situated herself in front of the full-length mirror. “This is as good as it’ll get.” She hurried downstairs and just outside the swinging doors into the kitchen, she stopped for a second to gain her breath and hopefully showed no signs of being nervous. Her palms were clammy and she swiped them down the thighs of her jeans.
Stepping in, she had a smile planted firmly into place.
Her gaze naturally swept down his damp T-shirt that clung to his large shoulders, wide chest and muscular arms. The big belt buckle glistened at his waist drawing her attention guiltily to the worn jeans that encased powerful thighs to the tips of worn, dirty boots, then back up to settle on his gorgeous blue eyes.
“Now that you’re dressed…”
“Yes, now that I’m dressed.” Her cheeks flushed. “Braise told me you wouldn’t be out until later. I took it as later in the day, not morning.” Or I would have been presentable.
“I meant to tell you last night that I would be running behind. I had some business to tend to earlier.”
“Oh, sure, I bet. It’s raining so really there’s nothing to do on the land except play in mud puddles.” Shutting up would be best, but she couldn’t help herself. She was as nervous as a mouse surrounded by traps. “Would you like a cup of coffee?” She needed to do something with herself.
“I’ll take a cup and then we should unload Torment now that the rain has died down for a minute.”
She swiveled, looking at him curiously. “Unload what?”
“The bull.”
“I’m not sure what ‘bull’ you’re unloading, but I’m not aware of it.”
“I told Lucas when I called that I would bring him. I assumed you already knew.”
She crossed her arms over her chest in exasperation. “No, I had no clue. Why did he buy a bull from you when we’re trying to unload some of our livestock?”
Weston's Trouble (Saddles & Second Chances Book 3) Page 13