by Janet Dailey
She started to walk past him, intent on leaving, but he stepped into her path. Her shimmering gaze lifted coolly to his face, surprised by the look of a wounded animal in intense pain that she saw in his dark blue eyes.
Immediately his gaze hardened into blue steel.
"Where do you think you're going?" he challenged.
For an instant, Alanna thought she had seen, in the tormenting ache in, his eyes, the same excruciating pain that she was feeling. But she realized it was damaged ego, disgusting male pride, too fragile to withstand any rejection.
"I told you, I'm leaving," she stated forcefully. "Leaving this house. Leaving this marriage. Leaving you."
"What do you want me to do?" His jaw worked convulsively. "Do you want me to get down on my knees and beg you to stay? Crawl to you? Is that what you're seeking? Do you want me to grovel at your feet so your triumph can be complete?"
"That would be a sight to see, the giant of Mesabi at my feet." Alanna laughed bitterly through her tears.
"Does it give you satisfaction to know that you can bring me to my knees?" Rolt demanded harshly.
"None at all." Not when it was pride causing his downfall.
"Nothing I can say or do will make any difference, is that it?"
"There is one thing I'd like to know." Her chin quivered, but pride kept her gaze level. "Before that seduction scene last night, did you know that I'd seen Kurt yesterday afternoon?"
"Yes."
Even though she had braced herself for the affirmative answer, Alanna still couldn't stop herself from recoiling as if struck by his hard, unapologetic voice.
A hot tear burned down her cheek.
"What a fool I made of myself!" she breathed achingly. "You made love to me because you were afraid Kurt would steal my virginity before you did. I never realized love could be such a humiliating emotion."
"Love!" Rolt grabbed her shoulders and shook her violently. "You don't know anything about love!" Pulling her on her tiptoes, he drew her within inches of his face. "Do you know what it was like all these weeks when I sat in this house knowing, you were out on a date with Kurt, imagining you in his arms, kissing him? Have you any idea how it felt to see that dislike in your eyes every time you looked at me? Love." He groaned the word huskily, anguish-darkened eyes sweeping over her face. Alanna was stunned, certain her ears were deceiving her.
"The first time I saw Dorian Powell's teenaged daughter I was fascinated by her. When you matured into a woman, I couldn't stop myself from loving you. I still can't. Yes, I forced you to marry me—I tricked, I blackmailed, I manipulated. I think I would have done anything to have you as my wife. Okay, so I didn't play fair, but whoever said life was fair? I thought I could make you love me in time. Last night—" He shook his head and let her go, not finishing the sentence. "And today you met Kurt."
From somewhere Alanna found her voice. "But I didn't meet Kurt."
"Alanna, don't lie to me," he sighed heavily.
"I'm not lying. Are you?" she whispered.
Rolt frowned, confused. "Lying about what?"
"Do you—love me?"
She had to pause to swallow the lump of apprehension in her throat.
"Isn't that what I've been saying all along?" Pain furrowed his brow. "I love you, Alanna."
The statement was not accompanied by any flowery speeches or declarations, yet its stark simplicity carried more depth of emotion than the others could have done.
"I love you, Rolt." At his pained glance of skepticism. Alanna hastened to elaborate. "I've been fighting against falling in love with you since our wedding, trying to make myself believe it was only physical attraction, but I wasn't very convincing. The only reason I met Kurt yesterday was because I wanted to see for myself that I still loved him. I'm not sure if I ever did love him. I only know that I don't love him. He's nice and I'm fond of him, but it's you I love."
His gaze narrowed, thoughtful and wary. "Today—"
"Today I went into town, bought champagne and came straight home." Alanna repeated her earlier explanation. "I didn't see Kurt, I was too anxious to come back to fix our dinner this evening. It was to be the first real dinner we'd shared as husband and wife, a second wedding night with candlelight, champagne and flowers. Because I love you."
She was caught in the crush of his arms, his face buried in the dark amber curls of her hair. Her hands instinctively slid around him. Alanna felt him shudder.
"It's enough if you only think you love me," he muttered thickly. "Just give me a chance to make up for all the things I've done. Just don't leave me, Alanna. Don't leave me."
"I'll never leave you," she whispered the vow.
Rolt cupped her face in his hands, his compelling gaze holding the brilliance of hers.
"Never is a long time," he reminded her with faint wryness.
"Never," Alanna repeated the promise.
The muffled cry of a loon echoed over still lake waters. The sun smiled and winked at the empty place settings on the dining room table. He knew he could take his time about sinking below the horizon. It would be a long time before anyone thought about lighting the candles.
All rights reserved, including without limitation the right to reproduce this ebook or any portion thereof in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of the publisher.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, events, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 1978 by Janet Dailey
Cover design by Open Road Integrated Media
ISBN 978-1-4976-1905-0
This edition published in 2014 by Open Road Integrated Media, Inc.
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