His gut clenched at the thought of endless lonely nights in the cabin, and the long numerous days without hearing her voice, without seeing her smile. Forever on the mountain had transformed from a quiet, peaceful solitude, to his own personal brand of hell.
Ronan was right, he was different. He was a different man for having known Belle. She’d brought out a piece of him he’d thought had died years ago. A piece of him that made him hope and want so much more.
A life, family, love...all with Belle.
But was she better off without him? His presence had hurt so many people throughout the years. He’d caused so much pain and suffering.
But as he studied the stars, his mind whispered, Was it really you?
Anguish racked his soul as he thought of his failures. He’d thought he’d gone to the mountain to protect others, but now, he knew that wasn’t true.
He’d gone to protect himself.
He couldn’t bear to lose one more person he cared about. So he’d hid away from everyone, never allowing himself to get close enough to another human being.
Until Belle.
And now, he’d fallen in love with her. The thought of leaving her, of never seeing her again, tore a hole in his soul he knew could never be repaired. Living without her was a nightmare he had no wish to live through.
Did she even want to see him again? He knew she cared for him. But caring wasn’t love. She’d come to him and forced him into the world out of duty. And after tonight, that duty ended.
He stilled. Was that what she’d wanted to tell him? To wish him well and send him off alone? Maybe even thank him for his willingness to do as she’d asked over the last week?
What would he even say to that?
He closed his eyes, stilling his mind and heart. He would know soon enough.
Chapter 13
With a deep breath, Belle took the last step out of the hotel’s entrance. This was the moment she had both dreaded and hoped for her whole life.
She would finally tell a man she loved him.
She spied Asher on the boardwalk in front of the barber’s shop across the square and made her way to him. It was quiet outside, the night was still, regardless of the party still going on inside. It almost felt like she was in another world, another time. Where it was just her and Asher.
She stepped on the boardwalk and he wordlessly handed her a cup. “Thank you.” She took a sip, hoping it would calm her nerves, hoping it would give her the moment she needed to gather her thoughts. With a bracing breath, she lowered her cup and gave him her full attention. “Thank you for coming out here to talk to me.”
“You said it was important.”
He looked at her, his face completely blank, and she wondered what he was thinking, how he felt. Unsure, she cleared her throat. “It was. I mean it is.” She squared her shoulders. She would not ruin this moment. “I wanted to thank you for agreeing to everything you did—the scavenger hunt, and Founder’s Day, and tonight. I know you didn’t want to, and I appreciate everything you’ve done. I forced it upon you, I’m sorry for that, but I’m grateful anyway.”
He looked down to his drink and his jaw clenched. “Don’t apologize.”
“I’m sorry?” Realizing what she said, she shook her head. “Sorry!” She groaned. “Sorry.” Just be quiet! But he didn’t seem upset by her repeated apologies.
“I don’t want you to apologize, because I’m glad you forced my hand.”
“You are?”
He nodded, taking a hesitant step toward her. “I’ve been hiding on the mountain, hiding away from everyone and everything. I thought I did it to protect others, but I’ve really just been a coward, protecting myself.”
“Don’t say that!” Upset coursed through her, and she took the final step toward him, placing her hand on his arm. “You are no coward, Asher. You’re brave, you’ve done so much...for everyone. And this last week, I was impressed by everything you put in to each event. You could’ve shown up, waved at me once or twice, and that would’ve fulfilled your end of the bargain. But you didn’t. You gave each day your all. If you’d been a coward, you would’ve never agreed in the first place. You would’ve never left your cabin.” She ended her tirade on a huff, slightly embarrassed by her outburst.
This conversation wasn’t going like she’d planned. Frustrated, she looked everywhere but at him, feeling like she’d ruined the moment. It would be better to try again another time.
But before she could turn away, his thumb brushed her cheek, caressing the raised color she knew was there.
Her eyes slowly returned to his, and no matter what she’d just thought, the minute she looked into his hazel eyes, she lost all desire to wait. “I love you, Asher.”
His thumb stopped moving, but instead of backtracking, she pushed forward, stubborn as ever. Her hand joined his on her cheek, holding it there. “I love you. I know it’s not a romantic moment, I know I promised to leave you alone—and I will—but not without telling you I love you. I can’t live with myself if I never told you.”
He swallowed hard, staring into her eyes as if searching for something. But she didn’t know if he searched within her, or within himself.
I pushed too hard, she realized. She’d forced him out of his home, forced him into town, made him interact with others, and now she’d pushed yet again. But this time, the moment when it was most important, she’d gone too far. “You don’t have to say anything—”
But before she could finish, he yanked her toward him, into his arms, and his lips were on hers. Her eyes widened in surprise, but as he deepened the kiss, she closed them in bliss. Fire coursed through her and she embraced it...relished it...craved it.
Every feeling or thought that rushed through her mind was him, only him, and she expressed that with her lips, with her hands running up his back and gripping his shoulders. She wanted to touch him, hold him against her forever.
He broke their kiss roughly and tucked her head under his chin. His chest heaved, and she basked in the knowledge that she had brought him to that point.
“Too many people,” he finally said. “Can we go somewhere?”
Bemused, she looked around, realizing again where they were. Anyone could come out and see them. She pulled away to look at him. The warmth in his eyes spoke of his desire—and she prayed—even more. But she wouldn’t find out here.
She took another step away, still holding his hand, refusing to let him go. “Let me tell the others we’re heading back to the house. There’s still so much to say.”
She leaned forward for another quick kiss, before breaking contact and rushing to the hotel entrance. Her hand fluttered to her stomach. She could scarcely believe what had happened…what might still happen.
Happiness enveloped her and she entered the ballroom as if a light blazed inside her. She looked around the room, spying several of the women on the floor with dance partners. The only one against the wall was Sadie. With Sadie’s pregnancy, Belle wasn’t too surprised she’d needed to rest.
She headed across the room, politely declining offers to dance as she made her way to Sadie.
Sadie saw her a few steps away and a smile brightened her face. “You did it. You told him!” She reached out and gripped Belle’s hands.
Belle giggled, hardly recognizing the sound through her happiness. “I did. I told him. Oh, Sadie, I’m so happy! This is amazing.”
“What did he say?”
“He hasn’t said anything yet…” Belle glanced around to see if anyone could overhear her. “He kissed me.”
Sadie squeezed her hands. “What can I do?”
“I came to tell you that we’re heading back to the house. We need to talk.”
“Of course! Go. I’ll tell the others.” She leaned forward and hugged Belle tightly. “I’m so happy for you.”
Belle’s eyes stung. Her life was so blessed. “Thank you. Thank you for everything. I’m so glad I have you all.”
Sadie’s eyes glistened too. “
We’re all lucky.”
“Well, I better get going. Don’t want to keep him waiting.”
They both laughed with joy. Her life couldn’t be better than this moment—
“Fire!”
Screams filled the air and people rushed toward the exits. At the same moment, the scent of smoke filled Belle’s nose and stung her eyes.
Sweat chilled on Belle’s skin, and her hand locked with Sadie’s. They had to get out of there. Flames licked up the walls, creating a blazing heat that scorched her skin. Thick black billows of smoke rose to the ceiling like balloons.
“We have to get out of here!” she yelled to Sadie, hoping her friend would hear her over the noise. But as she looked around, she knew there was no way they’d make it through the only doorway not encompassed by flames. If they tried, they’d surely be trampled.
Her eyes darted around, looking everywhere for a way out. Spying a window, she tugged Sadie to follow her and hit the window over and over, trying to shatter it. “We need to find something to break this!”
Belle cradled her bloody fist against her stomach as she looked around for an object heavy enough to break through. Seeing a silver candlestick in an alcove not far away, she raced over to it, praying it was heavy enough to break through the panes. She grabbed it while already turning back toward the window, and lost her balance, though never losing her grip on the object. She quickly regained her balance, and that was when she realized…the candlestick was bolted down.
They weren’t going to make it out.
When the first shout sounded, Asher was already halfway across the street. People raced from the building, coughing and yelling for someone to ring the fire bell.
She’s inside.
“Belle!” Terror raced through him.
More people ran from the building, but there were too many people, and fires could get out of hand quickly, especially in a place like the hotel where everything from the drapes, to the upholstered furniture, fed the flames.
He looked over the faces coming out, paying closer attention to the women. Where was she? More people funneled out as billows of smoke escaped through the door.
“Belle!” he yelled again, praying she would hear and answer him.
But he couldn’t hear anything over the screaming.
He tried to push through the crowd, to get inside to find her, but there was no way. People were trying to get out with too much force.
Panicking, he ran around the building looking for another door, another way in. As he ran by a row of windows, he heard banging and stopped. Turning, he raced back to the window. Orange flames glowed from within, and he knew it had to be the ballroom. Another thump sounded on the other side of the glass.
“Hold on!” he yelled, but doubted whoever was inside would hear him over the chaos. He turned in a circle, scouring the ground and the side of the hotel with his eyes, looking for something—anything—that was strong enough to break through the window. Spying a bent metal pipe, he grabbed it and thumped it against his other hand to test the weight. It would have to do.
He raced back to the window. “Stand back!” He prayed the other person wouldn’t get injured.
With a force born out of desperation, he hefted the pole back behind his head and brought it down on the glass with a crack.
Glass shattered, erupting around him and inside the room. “Are you all right?” he yelled into the hole, where a few pieces of metal from the panes remained.
“Asher?”
“Belle!”
Her sweat-stained face appeared in the window. “Can you break the rest? Sadie and I can’t get out.”
“Stand back!”
Belle fell back into the room with Sadie. “Hurry!” she screamed when the flames began to lick at their skirts.
With the force of ten men, Asher broke through the remaining iron. “Here!” He reached his arm in. “Grab onto me and I’ll pull you out.”
“Sadie first.”
He didn’t care who he pulled out first as long as he got them both. A delicate hand fitted into his and he pulled Sadie up and out through the window, placing her on the ground, before immediately returning for Belle. The second his hand was through the opening, he was already pulling her out.
He held her tightly against him, refusing to think of what could’ve happened. “Is there anyone else?”
“No. They’re all trying to get through the door.”
“Let me check to make sure.”
He put her down and looked through the hole, seeing people still trying to push through the door. “Over here!” he yelled, before glancing back at the women. “Get far from the building. I’m going to help them, then help put the fire out.”
Belle nodded, already herding Sadie away as they both coughed, trying to clear their lungs.
Asher pulled several more people through the window before the flames came too close. Sucking in breaths of fresh air, he ran to the front of the building where others were helping to extinguish the flame.
He jumped in line, handing buckets back and forth until his arms ached from the strain. But he didn’t stop; he wouldn’t until the fire was out. All the buildings here were made of wood and could easily catch flame. He wouldn’t let the town burn to the ground.
After what seemed like hours, although he admitted that his sense of time was skewed, the buckets began to slow. Finally, a shout echoed that the fire was out. Tired cheers sounded as people broke the line and collapsed in exhaustion.
Asher wiped the sweat off his face with his once-white dress shirt and looked around at the towns people he’d once sworn to stay away from. But watching their faces, seeing their looks of relief, he was grateful he’d been here. He’d helped save lives tonight.
He’d saved Belle and Sadie’s lives.
He’d been so lost before. He’d already realized he loved Belle, but almost losing her tonight, drove that knowledge straight to his heart.
Leaving his place in line, he glanced around to find her, and saw her on the ground farther down the line, her eyes closed as she rested.
He scooped her in his arms, and she gasped from fright until she opened her eyes and saw him. Her body went limp and he cradled her to his chest, grateful he still had the strength to hold her. “I thought you were going to go a safe distance away.”
“I had to help. This is my town too.”
A small smile curved his lips. “It is.”
He took her to the wagon and placed her inside while he hitched up his horse. The moment he climbed up beside her, he took her in his arms again, needing the feel of her against him.
She didn’t protest, but curled up even closer to him.
They were quiet as they drove back to her house, both exhausted from the ordeal to say much. He could’ve lost her tonight...before he’d even told her he loved her.
The thought shook him. He hadn’t given her the words. He’d kissed her, told her with his lips, but he hadn’t spoken them.
Pulling off the road, he parked the wagon.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, lifting her head from his chest.
He wrapped both arms around her, holding her tight. “I almost lost you tonight.”
She paused. “Asher…that wasn’t your fault,” she said, and he didn’t blame her for her train of thought. He had told her repeatedly that he was a danger to be around, that other people got hurt. But finally, he knew that wasn’t true.
“I know.”
She stilled. “You do?”
“I do.” He sighed. “I was wrong before, Belle. I know that. I didn’t cause all those things to happen. They just did. Just like tonight. Fires happen. We lose people we love. It hurts, but that’s part of life. If I hadn’t been here tonight…if I hadn’t broken that glass…”
She leaned away and placed a finger over his lips. “Don’t think about that, it didn’t happen. You were there. You broke the glass and got me out. Because of you, no one died.”
He took her hand from his lips, k
issing her fingertips before bringing it between them and cradling it to his chest. “I love you, Belle.” Tears filled her eyes, and he leaned his forehead against hers. “I love you so much, and the thought of never telling you chills my heart. If something had happened to you, if I hadn’t gotten to you in time, it would’ve killed me.”
“Don’t—”
“It would’ve,” he said with finality. “My body would’ve lived, but my heart would’ve died.” With his eyes closed, he inhaled, digging deep inside himself for strength to talk about this. “When Lily died, I was heartbroken. I cared for her, but we weren’t in love. We expected love would grow in time, but when she was killed, it wounded me. More so because I’d failed to protect her. But if I ever lost you—”
“You won’t.”
He held her close again, blocking out fears of the future. “I couldn’t go another second without telling you. You need to know. I love you so much. I was a fool, Belle, hiding up on the mountain. My life is here, with you.”
When a happy tear slipped down her cheek, he cupped her face and kissed her softly, tenderly, and whispering words of love as she returned his kiss.
“I love you too,” she said. “I love you.”
He cradled the back of her head, bringing her eyes to his. “Marry me then. Let me build a home with you. Anywhere you choose, I’ll follow you. Just say you’ll marry me.”
“I will.” She kissed him again. “I will marry you. I’ll build a home and family with you. I don’t care where, Asher. Even if it’s on the mountain.” A small laugh escaped her lips. “I just want you.”
He crushed his lips to hers, sealing her words forever. From this moment on, he would never be alone again.
Epilogue
Testing out the porch swing Asher had added to the cabin in the meadow, Belle leaned into Asher’s arm and watched the clouds change to brilliant colors at sunset. After their wedding a few months ago, they’d debated where to live, and she had decided she wanted to live where it had all started.
A Mail-Order Hope (Miners to Millionaires Book 3) Page 10