by N M Thorn
“Hold on,” said Gunz, stopping her at the door, “don’t you have Taekwondo training tonight?”
“Not tonight,” she said, gazing at him pleadingly, “please, I just want a quiet evening.”
“At least call Aidan and let him know,” suggested Gunz, as they walked outside, and Tessa locked her door. “And do me a favor… If you don’t want to see me dying a very painful and violent death, please don’t tell him that you’re with me.”
“No problem, Mr. Burns,” said Tessa giggling, climbing into his car, “I like seeing you alive.”
“At least someone does,” muttered Gunz under his breath, driving away from the condominium complex.
Since Gunz moved to Coral Springs, it has become a part of his everyday routine. Even though he had powerful wards and protection spells placed on his house, every time when he came back home, before he opened his door, he had to probe the house and the backyard for any supernatural presence.
He approached the door and closed his eyes, relying on his Fire Salamander sense. The house was clean, but there was something off in the backyard. He wasn’t sure what it was, but something felt off.
Gunz opened the door and walked inside first. He scanned the house again and only after he was sure that everything was clear, he let Tessa in. He told her that he needed to step out for a few minutes and asked her to stay inside until he came back. She snatched the purring kitten into her hands and went upstairs, seemingly unconcerned with anything else. A minute later, he heard her walking around the bedroom, discussing something with Mishka.
Cautiously, he opened the backdoor and stepped outside. As soon as he passed the threshold, he heard a loud whistling sound. He could never mistake this sound for anything. His military training kicked in and he dropped on the ground, covering his head with his arms. A missile whizzed through the air and a powerful explosion rattled the ground beneath him.
The downpour of sand and debris dropped on his back, covering him from head to toe. He coughed, swallowing dust, and scrambled to his knees. Everything around him was spinning, his head was buzzing, and something was ringing in his ears, rendering him deaf. He struggled to his feet and took a couple of unsteady steps forward. A moment later, his visions steadied, and he froze in place.
He wasn’t in his backyard. He was standing on top of a hill, holding his sniper rifle in his hand. From this elevated position, Gunz could see a half-destroyed city a short distance away. Partially demolished houses were staring at him with empty eyes of glassless windows. Piles of bricks and debris were blocking the roads. As his hearing slowly started coming back, the distinct barking sound of gunfire broke through the constant ringing in his ears and the air got filled with the roaring of airplane engines. All this looked painfully familiar.
What the hell? thought Gunz and spun around, still disoriented.
Another missile shrieked through the air and Gunz fell on the ground, pushed by someone’s strong hand. A man fell on top of him, covering him from the explosion.
“Gunz! For the love of God, man, what are you doing?” He heard a voice in his ear and he recognized it right away.
“Oleg?” he mumbled. “But how?”
“Sasha, Sergei… I found him. He’s fine.” He heard Oleg’s voice and struggled to his feet. A few yards away he saw his friends, partially concealed by a camouflage screen. Behind them there were a few more soldiers. He knew them all, they used to be a part of his unit. Used to be… Gunz shuddered. He recognized where he was, and he remembered what was going to follow next.
“Oleg, incoming!” Sasha’s desperate voice rang through the communication system.
Oleg cried out like from pain, and a powerful shield enclosed the area around them. Another blast rocked the ground, as a missile blew up just a few feet away from them. The explosion propelled the dirt in the air, like a thick black fountain, carrying death and destruction in its wake. Oleg’s shield got impacted by a powerful blast but withheld it. A moment later everything was over. Oleg let go of his shield, his knees buckled, and he dropped to the ground, breathing laboriously.
Gunz didn’t need to look. He already knew. Sergei, Sasha, and Oleg – his friends, his brothers – they were alive. To save his friends, Oleg exposed his magic for the first time in his life. But everyone else around them were dead. Gunz squeezed his head with his hands, his fingers digging into his scalp, and screamed.
No, not again, no… Gunz counted to ten, slowly getting in control of his spiraling emotions and spun around, quickly surveying the area. Someone is messing with me. All I need to do is find something that doesn’t belong here.
He found what he was looking for almost immediately. A tall oak tree was growing just a few yards away from where he was standing. Gunz snarled, an overwhelming anger and cold determination making his blood boil.
“Ignius,” he hissed, extending his hand toward the oak tree.
A tight flaming circle surrounded the tree. Gunz ran to it, his whole body now engulfed in flames. Stepping into the fire, for a moment he dissolved into his element. The tree trembled, the leaves falling to the ground and the surroundings started to change. A moment later, Gunz was standing back in his backyard.
“Who are you?” he roared, stepping closer to the tree, setting the ground around it on fire. “Show yourself, or I swear to God, I’ll reduce you to ashes.”
The tree spun in place, the air around it twinkled with green lights, and a slender young man manifested in its place. The man folded his arms over his chest and laughed, throwing his head back.
“Hello, Fire Gecko,” he said, a mischievous gleam in his glowing phosphoric eyes. He put his hands on his hips and tilted his head slightly. “Game over, you won. You got me.”
“You motherf—,” exhaled Gunz, chocking on anger. His shaking hands clenched into fists. “Game? You, asshole… you made me relive the most painful memories of my life! It’s a game to you?”
“Oh yeah… sorry about that,” the man said, raising his hands in the air. “Nothing personal. I just needed to play a few pranks on you… How did you like your swimming pool fiasco or the car troubles? The smoke in a cold car was a nice touch, eh?”
Gunz stared at the man, incredulous. “Son of a bitch… I think I know you…” he whispered. “You’re Sven. One of Aidan’s men.”
“Ta-dah!” sung Sven, clapping his hands. “And the prize goes to the fried lizard!”
Gunz took a few deep breaths, extinguishing all the fire within him, leaving only the burning circle around Sven.
“Sven,” he whispered. “These glowing eyes… I can’t believe I didn’t recognize what you were the first time I met you. You’re Svyatobor, aren’t you? Slavic god of nature. You’re a god! Did Aidan put you up to it? Why?”
From what Gunz remembered, Svyatobor was one of the high nature deities in Slavic mythology. He was a god of forests and all forest dwellers. In the old days, people believed that he had the power over their lives and their destiny. But they also knew that he was a mischievous trickster and they used to do anything just to appease him and get on his good side.
“Good for you! You’re a smart little reptile, know your Slavic pantheon and all. I’m honored.” He threw a mocking bow in Gunz’s direction.
“Why, Svyatobor? Just tell me why Aidan hates me so much?” Gunz repeated his question quietly. His anger slowly simmered down, leaving him tired and resigned.
Svyatobor stopped laughing, quickly sobering up. He pursed his lips, taking in his appearance and sighed.
“That’s something I can’t tell you, Zane. You need to talk to Aidan and sort things out with him,” he said, shaking his head. “I did only what he asked me to do. And I’m truly sorry, I put you through hell. But you have to understand… This is how my power works – I can only create an illusion out of things that are already in your memory. When I agreed to play a few pranks on you, I had no idea what kind of horrors were stored in your brain…”
Gunz touched the burning circle, orde
ring the fire to cease. “You’re free to go. Please leave,” he said quietly, his voice painfully hoarse.
Svyatobor started to say something but then changed him mind. He snapped his fingers and vanished, leaving a few oak leaves behind.
Gunz turned around and slowly moved toward the house. The old, painful memories that he worked so hard to push far away in the depths of his mind, now resurfaced with agonizing clarity. He opened the door and walked inside the house. Not fully realizing what he was doing, he passed through the kitchen and stopped in the middle of the living room.
He looked around, his gaze empty, everything inside him hollow. He knew where he was, but the memories of the war were playing in front of his eyes, making him dizzy and disoriented. Mechanically, he opened the wine cabinet and pulled a vodka bottle out. With shaking hands, he opened the bottle and froze, staring at the clear liquid.
Tessa and his wyvern were somewhere on the second floor. He couldn’t drink… He shouldn’t… He must keep his mind clear… He grunted but closed the bottle and put it back inside the cabinet. Something fell upstairs with a loud thud. Inside his clouded mind, he knew that it was probably Tessa dropping something, but his body reacted to the sound on its own.
Gunz dropped to the floor, covering his head with his arms.
~ Zane Burns, a.k.a. Gunz ~
The darkness surrounded him, embracing him with its cold menacing touch. It wasn’t soft and relaxing. It was harsh, painful and violent. It was ripping his flesh apart, while the sounds of war were ravaging his frazzled mind. The shrieking and whistling of missiles, the earth-crashing blasts of explosions, the dry cough of automatic weapons – everything was mixed into one giant cacophony of sounds, excruciating, nonstop, gut-wrenching racket. And over all that, he still could hear the voices – screams of pain, cries of terror, the shouting of commands – fear and adrenaline almost palpable in the air.
He breathed in the suffocating stench of war – sweat, burnt flesh, and blood. His hands smelled of gunpowder, bullet lubricant and the metallic odor of ammunition. He couldn’t see it, but he could feel the stock of his sniper rifle pressed against his shoulder, and the trigger under his finger.
Gunz cried out and squeezed his head with his hands. He tried to fight the darkness, somewhere in the back of his mind realizing that all this wasn’t real, but he was too weak, too tired and the darkness was winning. Open your eyes, wake up, he ordered himself, but he couldn’t. It was too painful, too hard…
He felt a soft touch on his shoulder. Someone was talking to him, calling his name. A welcomed voice was pushing the sounds of war away and down. The touch became stronger, more persistent. It was destroying the horrors of war that were alive only in his memory, shattering them into pieces.
Gunz flinched and opened his eyes. For a moment everything around him was blurry, but slowly his vision came to focus, and he saw Tessa. She was kneeling on the floor next to him. Pulling on his shoulders, she was trying to turn him onto his back. Her eyes were wide with shock and worry.
“Zane, are you okay? Say something.” He heard her voice, filled with concern, and he tried to sit up. She helped him up, supporting him with her arms and he leaned back against the cabinet.
“I’m fine,” he replied, hardly recognizing his own voice. “Just give me a moment and I’ll get up.”
Slowly, he managed to scramble to his feet, still a little disoriented, and sat down on the couch, hiding his face in his hands. He felt Tessa sitting down next to him, her hand gently stroking his back and shoulders. She wasn’t talking to him, wasn’t asking anything, and he appreciated the silence. For the first time in the last year, he felt like he wasn’t alone, and it felt good.
Gunz lowered his hands, exposing his face glistening with cold sweat. His eyes fell on the open wine cabinet. He wanted it, just one shot of vodka to help him relax and forget. No, he needed it – desperately and agonizingly, to help him bury these unwanted memories somewhere in the darkest, deepest corner of his mind, so they would never break free again.
Tessa got up and walked to the wine cabinet. She picked up the open bottle with vodka and turned to him, holding it in her hands.
“Do you need it?” she asked quietly.
“Yes, but I can’t,” he croaked, lowering his eyes.
“Zane, you were in a war zone before, weren’t you?” she asked, putting the bottle back in the cabinet and closing it. “You have PTSD.” She made a pause, but he didn’t answer. “I recognize the symptoms. I saw it a few times before. My uncle had it after he served in Afghanistan.”
“I’ll be all right,” said Gunz, trying to smile. He wasn’t sure that it looked like a smile, just a grimace resembling one. “Yes, I did a few military tours back in my country, but I never had PTSD… Someone was messing with my mind and brought all this darkness forward. It’s over now. Thank you, Tessa.”
He relaxed back in the couch, little by little his sanity and much needed focus returning back to him. Tessa sat down, staring at him with curiosity.
“Back in your country? You’re not from here?” she asked, astonished. “You have no accent in your English. Where are you from?”
Gunz didn’t reply right away. His eyes found a large digital frame that was sitting on the shelf next to his TV. Photos of forests, rivers, lakes, city streets were slowly sliding through the screen. He watched the pictures changing inside the frame and sighed.
“I moved here slightly over a year ago,” he said, pointing at the digital frame. “Originally, I am from Belarus. The reason I don’t have an accent is because in reality, I don’t speak English. I use magic to speak and understand. A long time ago, someone told me that magic doesn’t have language barriers. It’s true.”
Tessa approached the frame and stood there for a few minutes, watching the pictures until they went full circle. Then she turned around and smiled warmly.
“Your land is beautiful. Are these photos of your city?”
Gunz nodded. Sadness tightened his chest as he looked at the sliding photos. He missed his land, these endless rivers, deep lakes, the dark greenery of forests. He could spend hours just sitting at the lake, fishing, or doing absolutely nothing, just enjoying the view. This wild land was always his sanctuary, a place where he could forget everything and relax, body and soul.
But even more than his land, he missed his friends. With all his heart he wished they were here now, standing by his side as they always did. Everything would be so much easier… He swallowed and stared down at his clenched hands.
He came to terms with his situation. He was never going to see his friends or come back to Belarus again. His life was here now. And this digital frame with the photos of his past was just a small reminder, his safe place when he felt the need to forget the present for a few short moments.
“You’re homesick,” whispered Tessa, staring at him, her eyes widened, filled with surprise.
Gunz chuckled softly, putting his arm behind his head, relaxing. “No, Tessa, I’m not homesick and I don’t have PTSD. I’m fine, believe me. But you’re not. So, let’s talk about you.”
“What’s there to talk about?” she said with a light dismissive shrug. “You already know about me more than anyone else. But you did promise to tell me what you are, magically speaking. I’m still waiting.”
Gunz glanced at her and shook his head. She was so very young, just a little curious girl. For her young age, she seemed to be strong, definitely no damsel in distress as she put it herself. But right now, she needed help, even if she didn’t realize or admit it yet.
“How about we make a deal,” proposed Gunz, winking at her. “We talk about you a little and then I tell you what I am and even give you a little magic show. Deal?”
As soon as he finished talking, Tessa lit up with glee. It was like a lightbulb going up somewhere inside her and she glowed with excitement.
“It’s a deal!” she exclaimed. “Can we do your part first?”
“Nice try,” said Gunz, suppressing
laughter, but then changed back to serious. “Tessa, it’s important that we talk about your situation. You probably don’t realize it, but right now you’re hiding. By staying here, in my house, you’re hiding from what you need to do, procrastinating or delaying the inevitable. And unfortunately, the kind of reality you and I live in, the truth will catch up with you sooner or later, no matter how hard you try to avoid it. So, from my experience, it’s better to face it right away and deal with it on your own terms.”
Gunz was expecting objections and arguments. He was expecting the rougher side of her personality to come through and tell him to mind his own business, but she didn’t.
“You’re right,” Tessa said, playing with the edge of her shirt, avoiding his eyes. “I am hiding here. I’m hiding because I’m too scared to go back and face the truth. I’m scared to learn what I am and why the Guardians are interested in me. And I hate it! I hate feeling scared and helpless. It’s not me!”
“Tessa, you have to do it. You can’t hide here forever.” He took her chin with his fingers and gently lifted her face. She glanced at him, her eyes deep and dark with sadness. “You need to go back home, open your mom’s secret room and read every single document, book or paper you find there. The more you know about yourself the safer it’ll be for you.”
“There are my mom’s diaries there. Three of them,” whispered Tessa, averting her eyes. “I can’t read those. It’s not right… it’s hers… personal. You know?”
Gunz shook his head, biting his lip. “You’re looking at it the wrong way, Tessa. Your mom is dead, and you can’t just come home and ask her questions. So, the only way to find out why the Guardians sent her to shadow you, is to read her diaries. The way your mom placed the wards and spells on her room was done so you could safely walk in. Only you, Tessa, and no one else. Don’t you think that perhaps everything she left in this room was for you to find and use? Including her diaries?”