When We Touch

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When We Touch Page 4

by Brenda Novak


  And then Olivia remembered. For most of one summer, Noelle had had the worst crush imaginable on Brandon. She’d done everything possible to gain his attention, including driving past his house numerous times a day, calling him incessantly, showing up wherever she guessed he might be. Olivia had forgotten that, largely because it’d been so long ago—eight years or more. And he hadn’t given her so much as a second look. When August rolled around, he told her flat-out that he wasn’t remotely interested and she’d better quit stalking him or he was going to the police.

  The police threat came—understandable enough—after she’d spied on him with another woman, but his unequivocal rejection had done significant damage to Noelle’s ego.

  “Why are you smiling?” Noelle snapped.

  Olivia sobered. “I guess I still don’t understand why you’re upset.”

  Noelle grabbed her arm. “I’m upset because you’re doing this on purpose! You’re trying to ruin my wedding!”

  “What?” Olivia jerked loose. “I’ve been planning your wedding—for free! Not only have I donated hours and hours of my time, I’ve called in favors from all the vendors I’ve ever worked with.”

  “For Mom and Dad. Not for me.”

  Olivia couldn’t argue with that.

  “This is your revenge,” she continued. “This is how you think you’ll get the last laugh.”

  “What are you talking about?” Noelle had liked a lot of boys over the years. She couldn’t claim proprietary interest in all of them. Besides, after that summer she’d never had a nice thing to say about Kyle’s stepbrother.

  “I’m talking about you sleeping with Brandon!”

  So Kyle had shared that information. “I don’t see why my being with Brandon would bother you. You’re in love with Kyle, right? You’re having his baby. And because of that baby, he’s marrying you.”

  “Not because of the baby!” she cried, stamping her foot. “Because he loves me! I knew you’d try to cheapen it, try to convince yourself that he’s still in love with you. But he’s not. He hates that the two of you were ever together!”

  When they talked on the phone for the last time, Kyle had said the two years they’d spent together were the best of his life, but Olivia didn’t give him away. His feelings had probably already changed.

  “Fine. He hates that we were together. He hates me. I don’t care. He’s all yours now. You got exactly what you wanted. So enjoy him and leave me alone.”

  “I didn’t get pregnant on purpose. I know you think I did.”

  “At this point, it doesn’t matter what I think.” She turned to go but Noelle wasn’t finished yet.

  “Does Brandon know?”

  Olivia hesitated with her hand on the doorknob. “Know what?”

  “That I’m pregnant?”

  Why would he care? “Of course he does. Everyone in town knows.”

  “Your relationship with Brandon won’t last,” she said suddenly, changing tactics. “He isn’t the marrying kind.”

  “Fortunately, after what I’ve been through in the past few months, I’m only looking for some fun.” Unable to resist, she lowered her voice. “And, God, can he provide it!”

  * * *

  Kyle had the hardest time keeping his eyes from gravitating to Olivia. She looked better than ever—tall, tan, hair streaked from the sun. But, despite her shapely legs—which happened to be his favorite part of the female anatomy—her appearance had nothing to do with how he felt. She’d always been beautiful to him, the only woman he’d ever loved. Just seeing her made his determination falter.

  How had he gotten into such a terrible mess? These days, he constantly asked himself that. But he had no answer—except the obvious. He’d been an idiot, foolish enough to make the kind of mistake that would change his life forever.

  He wished he could stop time, demand everyone back up and let him start over. But he’d seen the results of the pregnancy test. With a baby coming, there were no second chances.

  “Honey, you have to put three hugs and three kisses in each box,” Noelle said.

  He blinked at the foil-wrapped chocolate candies. Wasn’t that what he’d been doing? He opened the last wedding favor he’d assembled. She was right. He’d put in five kisses and only one hug. He’d thought, as long as they each included six pieces, it wouldn’t matter. They had more than enough of both kinds. But every little detail mattered to Noelle.

  “Got it.” He smiled as congenially as possible to keep Olivia and her parents from knowing how badly Noelle’s voice grated on him.

  Three kisses, he silently mimicked. And three hugs. Along with a scrap of paper that read, What’s the earth with all its art, verse, music worth—compared with love, found, gained, and kept? —Robert Browning

  “Kyle, is something wrong?”

  He glanced up to see his future mother-in-law watching him. He hadn’t realized he’d slipped into inactivity. He was sitting there, staring at that damn line of Robert Browning’s.

  “No.” His cheek muscles ached with the effort of yet another smile. “I was just wondering if I’d remembered to invite my aunt Georgia.”

  “You invited her,” Noelle said without looking up. “You had so many on your list I had to cut twenty from mine, remember?”

  He didn’t know if he was supposed to apologize. He’d tried to keep his list small. His was certainly smaller than hers, by a significant margin. He hadn’t wanted a big wedding. Given the situation, he much preferred they forgo the embarrassment of being married in Whiskey Creek and fly to Vegas. It seemed crazy to celebrate the hardest thing he’d ever done.

  But thanks to Noelle’s insistence on creating the fanfare she’d always craved for her wedding, they were looking at a long, painful weekend. One that included Olivia, making it impossible to avoid the fact that, if not for one foolish night, this could’ve been their wedding.

  Actually, he’d been with Noelle more than one night. It had been a whirlwind couple of weeks, during which she’d flirted and teased and cajoled and pleased. Caught in the aftermath of Olivia’s proposing a break and moving to Sacramento because she didn’t want to settle down without experiencing a little more of life, he’d been feeling rejected, unsure she’d ever really come back and angry enough to tell himself he didn’t have to suffer while she was gone. Their break hadn’t been his idea. The fact that they weren’t together but weren’t really apart left him feeling irritable and foolish.

  And this was where it had gotten him....

  Suppressing a groan, he started filling boxes again.

  “Did you find the right tie and cummerbund for your tux?” Olivia asked. It was the first time she’d initiated any conversation between them. He would’ve been grateful for her attention, would’ve seen it as a hopeful sign that she might eventually be able to forgive him, except he knew she was only asking as the wedding planner.

  “I have.”

  “And your groomsmen have the right ones, as well?”

  “Probably. I’ve told them where to go.”

  “You need to check.”

  “I will.”

  “Do they know the rehearsal dinner tomorrow has been moved to seven instead of six-thirty?”

  He kept forming little boxes and filling them with the appropriate chocolate candy before adding them to the stack in the middle of the table. The women took over from there, tying on a delicate pink ribbon imprinted with their names and the date of their wedding.

  Two days. The worst will be over in two days.... “I’ve notified them of that, too.”

  “Even Brandon?”

  He’d invited Brandon to be in the wedding party for the sake of his parents. He felt it would be too obvious a slight to leave him out. But other than receiving a brief email confirming his participation, Kyle hadn’t heard from his stepbrother. “Even Brandon.”

  “I’ll double-check with him tonight.”

  The idea of Olivia spending time with Brandon for any reason made Kyle flinch. She hadn’t meant
much to him when the two of them went to a prom together years ago. But she meant a lot to him now. “I can email him again.”

  “Why don’t you just call him?”

  He met her gaze. “Maybe I will.”

  Ham, as Olivia’s father was called, paused in his work to raise his eyebrows at this exchange. But, as usual, he didn’t say anything. Sometimes Kyle wished he would. He wished someone would admit that this wedding was a huge mistake. Because he couldn’t. If Noelle wanted to marry him, he had no choice. He had to stand up and do the right thing or he wouldn’t be able to live with himself later.

  Chapter 5

  Relieved to be away from her parents’ house, Olivia dialed Brandon’s number as she sat in her car, letting the engine idle in the empty parking lot of Just Like Mom’s. The diner was closed, along with almost everything else in town, including the touristy shops dedicated to Whiskey Creek’s gold rush heritage. It was late enough that she was hesitant to start the long drive home. She was tired. And she wasn’t optimistic that facing her empty apartment would be that much better than crashing in her old bedroom. She seemed to be miserable no matter what.

  “I’m not sure how to break this to you,” she said as soon as Brandon answered.

  “Break what to me?” he responded, his voice husky, which made her wonder if she’d awakened him. “You couldn’t have found someone with a bigger telescope.”

  She knew he was teasing but, feeling herself flush, decided to ignore the innuendo. “I, uh, told a little white lie about you.”

  “Did it make me look good or bad?” He didn’t sound too excited by the prospect either way.

  “Maybe a little opportunistic?”

  “Okay. Let me have it.”

  She drew a deep breath. “Kyle and Noelle think we’re seeing each other.”

  “That’s it?”

  “Not quite.”

  “I’m waiting…”

  “They also think we’re sleeping together.”

  “Really.”

  “I don’t know what got into me,” she said. “Kyle pulled me aside and said it was killing him to know he was causing me pain, and I…I couldn’t stand being so transparent and vulnerable. So I told him I’m not hurting at all, that I’m already seeing someone else.”

  “Me.”

  “Right. I could’ve named someone from Sacramento. That’s what I should’ve done, obviously. He couldn’t have proven that one way or the other. But…”

  “It wouldn’t have been half as much fun.”

  “No, it wouldn’t have had the same impact.” She’d found Noelle’s reaction even more satisfying than Kyle’s, but she didn’t mention that. She was fairly sure her sister would be a sore subject with Brandon, even after the number of years that had passed since she’d invaded his privacy. “I hope you’re not too sorry you stopped to help me.”

  “Not at all. I just wish I could’ve seen Kyle’s face.”

  She smiled as she remembered. “He went white as a sheet.”

  “Good. Maybe it gave him the jolt he needs.”

  “In what way?”

  “I haven’t given up hope that he’ll come to his senses and call the whole thing off.”

  Olivia pictured Kyle and Noelle as they’d been at dinner. They hadn’t seemed particularly close, but they were dealing with a lot of stress, even more than normally accompanied a wedding. She wasn’t convinced she could get an accurate reading from what she’d seen. “Maybe he loves her.”

  “You and I both know who he loves.”

  She hadn’t expected Brandon to be so candid. “There is the baby—”

  “Jumping into a marriage destined to end in divorce won’t help the baby.” He lowered his voice in a way that demanded an honest answer. “Would you take him back?”

  “No!”

  “You’re done with him no matter what he does, no matter how much he begs?”

  “He won’t beg. You know Kyle. Once he’s made up his mind, that’s it. He’d never embarrass Noelle, my parents or your family by backing out. Whatever else he might be, he’s a man of his word. But I’m done with him.”

  “And now you’re all mine.”

  The zap she’d experienced earlier, the one that left her feeling slightly giddy, struck again, like a lightning bolt out of the clear blue sky. Which made no sense. She was still in love with Kyle—although their relationship was completely and totally over.

  Assuming it was basic chemistry, the kind that could come out of nowhere even with a complete stranger, she shrugged off her reaction. He was merely referring to what she’d said earlier. “Or so they think. I’m sorry I went that far. I had no right to drag you into something that could have long-term repercussions inside your own family. But…it won’t turn out to be a big deal. I let both him and Noelle know it’s not serious. We don’t have to go around holding hands or anything. Maybe a smile or two at the wedding—that’s all.”

  “You’re saying you implied we’re not making love, just having sex.”

  “Exactly. But I made sure they knew it was mind-blowing.” She tried to joke a little herself but the images that flashed through her head—images of Brandon’s mouth on hers—made her words anything but funny.

  “There’s only one problem,” he said.

  “What’s that?”

  “If you told them it was casual, they already know you were lying.”

  For some reason, she was having difficulty catching her breath. “What makes you say that?”

  “Honey, you’re not capable of casual.”

  She’d certainly been more circumspect than he had. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t play the same game of Catch Me If You Can. “How do you know? I’m just as capable of free and easy as anyone.”

  “You’re speaking from experience? You’ve had other ‘free and easy’ relationships?”

  She thought of the two men she’d slept with. Both had been long-term, steady boyfriends. “Not yet,” she admitted. “But after what I’ve been through, I’m not looking for a commitment. I think everyone understands that. Emotional entanglements are too…sticky and…and confining.” The memory of Kyle coming forward to tell her he’d been with Noelle made her want to bang her head on the steering wheel again. “Not to mention painful,” she added. “And when they don’t work out you have to deal with regret for getting involved in the first place.”

  “I couldn’t have said it better myself.”

  “Why shouldn’t I have my fun just like everyone else?” she asked, warming to her defiance. “I’m twenty-seven. I can do whatever I want.”

  “Now you’re getting me excited.”

  She heard the humor in his voice but chose to ignore it. “Maybe I’ve been playing it too safe. Maybe I wouldn’t be the one nursing a broken heart if I was willing to take a walk on the wild side once in a while.”

  “I’ll buy that.”

  Again, she ignored the subtle smile in his voice because she loved feeling empowered. Just the idea of breaking the rules and getting away with it seemed to revive her flagging spirits. She could fight back if she wanted to!

  But her enthusiasm dimmed as fast as it had dawned when he said, “Great. Come on over. Venus is out tonight. I’ll show you.”

  Shit. She’d gone too far. She’d merely wanted him to respect her as someone equally capable of making that choice. Instead he’d called her bluff.

  Suddenly feeling the need to backpedal, she searched for a good excuse. “I would, but…you’re not the right kind of guy for my first hook-up.”

  “Are you kidding?” he said. “I’m the perfect guy. And I’m volunteering.”

  “That’s kind of you, but…it wouldn’t be…smart.”

  “Define smart.”

  “We wouldn’t gel. We’re not…compatible.”

  “Because…”

  She swallowed hard. He knew he appealed to women, knew she was no exception. What would he accept that would allow her to save face? “I’d be a boring partner for a thri
ll-seeker like you.”

  “That’s like saying you have to wash your hair,” he said flatly. “If you’re stepping up your game, you’re really going to have to do better.”

  “It’s not as lame as you’re making it sound.”

  “It’s worse. Face it. You’re all talk.”

  “No, I’m not,” she said. “Think of the women you’ve been with. The variety. The experience. I’d be…meat and potatoes when you’re used to caviar.”

  “Olivia?”

  It wasn’t hot outside. As a matter of fact, it was a bit chilly. Yet she was sweating. “Yes?”

  “Why don’t you let me decide what turns me on?”

  Because she’d long ago eliminated Brandon as a romantic possibility. She knew she couldn’t remain as aloof as he did. He seemed to sense the same thing, seemed to understand that she wasn’t capable of dealing with someone like him. “You’ve never even acted interested.”

  “Do you remember prom?” he asked.

  Of course she did. That night was tucked away in a special file in her brain, one she accessed every now and then so she could relive his good-night kiss. No one else had ever kissed her in quite the same way.

  But she didn’t want to think about that now. She was too scared. And not just because of her recent experience with Kyle. She’d been scared of Brandon from the beginning. “That was years ago.”

  “I know. But I’ve wanted you ever since. I’ll be here if you change your mind,” he said and hung up.

  * * *

  Olivia pressed her good hand over her face. She wasn’t sure what had just happened, how she and Brandon had rounded the corner from “acquaintances who’d once had a class together and went to a school dance” to “I’ve wanted you ever since” in such a short time. She figured it was her fault. She’d sent the wrong signals, especially when she’d had to let Brandon know she’d been telling others they were having sex. She supposed it was natural for him to take advantage if he sensed an opportunity. But she couldn’t accept what he’d offered, no matter how reckless and angry and fatalistic she might be feeling. One night with him would be enough to set her recovery back by months.

 

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