“I won’t let you do this,” Alex said. “I know I can fix everything! I just need you to tell me how to do it. I’ll save you and everyone else. Please, please, let me help you. Tell me how to make this right, and I swear I’ll do it.”
“I know you would,” Eerie said. “But it won’t work. That’s why I can’t let you try.”
“Eerie, no! You have to…”
“Hush, Alex,” she said, grabbing onto him and holding tight. “We have three nights and two days left, and we will spend them together. We will not be apart, and we will not be sad. Then you will fall asleep, and I will go to the Church, and everyone you truly care about will be safe here, waiting for you to wake up.”
He wanted to argue, but instead he found himself crying into her azure hair, sobbing uncontrollably.
“This is what I want, Alex. This is everything,” Eerie told him, stroking his back. “Just do this for me, and it will be nearly…”
“Nearly?” Alex sniffled. “What do you want?”
“I only have a few days left, and I think it would be nice to be in love. I know it will make you hurt more, when I’m gone, but it’s my only chance. Would you, Alex? Do you want to fall in love with me?”
“Don’t be stupid,” Alex said, grabbing her waist and pulling her near. “I obviously love you. Of course I fucking do.”
She went all soft in his arms, and then they kissed.
“See? It’s nice,” Eerie said. “I knew that it would be.”
***
“I’ll decide who gets housed where,” Rebecca insisted. “I’m the Director, and you are…I’m not entirely clear on what you are, these days, Emily.”
“I’m just a girl alone in an uncaring world,” Emily said, clasping her hands modestly. “Who also happens to be the owner of the Far Shores.”
“Oh yeah?” Rebecca got up in Emily’s face. “By what right?”
“By right of ‘what are you going to do about it?’”
“Don’t get cocky,” Rebecca said. “You and I are not on the same level, no matter how much time you’ve spent with Alex.”
“I do believe you enhanced your abilities the same way during your therapy sessions with him. As for the differences between us – perhaps you are correct, Director, in the narrowest possible interpretation. Taking this place is hardly a one-woman activity, though, I’m afraid. Do you think your pitiable group of children and civilians can conquer the Far Shores?”
“The Auditors…”
“They are exhausted and untrained,” Emily said. “You have Alice Gallow and Xia at best. It didn’t go very well the first time they tried to take me on, now, did it?”
“I’ve got Gerald Windsor…”
“Retired.”
“…and Michael Lacroix.”
“He was taken straight to the infirmary on arrival for rest and rehydration. He should still be in a trauma simulation, honestly. You should not have woken him early.”
“Like you could do any better,” Rebecca said, prodding Emily in the shoulder. “What do you have on your side, then, Emily? Huh? What do you…” Rebecca trailed off, staring at something behind Emily. “Holy shit. Holy shit! Is that Mitsuru?”
“What? Oh.” Emily turned around and waved. “Yes, that’s her. One of my many friends, Director.”
“No. No, that’s not her,” Rebecca said, licking her lips. “That’s that Anathema bitch, what’s her name, the one who animates corpses. Like with Edward Krylov, or…”
“That’s not Song Li. Well, Song Li was using her body for a while, but she’s been expelled, I assure you.” Emily smiled pertly. “I exorcised the Anathema myself, and restored Mitsuru from the last backup her implant had recorded.”
“Backup?”
“Another of Gaul’s little tricks. Those implants he built are rather marvelous, don’t you think?”
“You’re lying,” Rebecca said, backing away. “This is insane.”
“You should be thanking me,” Emily said. “Not only did I bring your friend back from the dead, I brought her back without the memories of her death, or anything from the preceding day. She doesn’t remember what you did to her, Director.” Emily gave Rebecca a knowing look. “She’s been told, obviously, but she doesn’t recall it.”
Rebecca searched her pockets for cigarettes in vain.
“Becca! Becca,” Mitsuru called, walking over purposefully. “It’s me.”
“Is it?” Rebecca croaked. “Is it really?”
“As far as I can tell,” Mitsuru said, grabbing her by the arm. “We need to talk.”
“Yeah, I think we do,” Rebecca said. “That’s probably a…hey! Let me go!”
“We need to talk right now,” Mitsuru said, dragging her away. “Privately.”
Emily waved as they left.
“Feel free to use one of the conference rooms,” Emily called out. “Since you are my guests here, and all,” she added quietly, smiling to herself.
Rebecca was able to keep it together until they were inside the meeting room, with the door closed behind them. Then she nearly fell into Mitsuru’s arms.
“Mitzi? Is it really…?”
“Yes. I think so.”
“Really?” Rebecca touched her face hesitantly, and Mitsuru flinched away. “It’s…you were dead. You were dead, weren’t you?”
“I can’t tell you one way or the other,” Mitsuru said. “I remember the night before the operation in the Ukraine. Things were tense, and I had a lot on my mind. I didn’t sleep much. Next thing I know, Emily Muir is waking me up in a track home somewhere in Nevada.”
“You were dead,” Rebecca repeatedly dully. “I – I had you killed, Mitzi. You lost it. You went nuts, and you were gonna kill everyone.”
“We both knew that was a possibility. I don’t blame you.”
“You should, though. You really should.” Rebecca grabbed hold of Mitsuru and put her head on her shoulder. “Oh, Mitzi, I’ve fucked up everything! I’ve done a terrible job as Director – I can tell everyone knows it. I can feel all of it! The doubt, the fear, it’s all just…”
“I won’t say you’ve done great,” Mitsuru admitted, patting Rebecca on the back. “I can’t think of anyone else who could have done better, though. You certainly aren’t the worst Director. I think we can all agree that Gaul takes that one.”
“I’m not sure,” Rebecca said, sniffling. “At least he knew what he was doing when he betrayed all of us and everything.”
“You’re being too hard on yourself.”
“I lost Central to Gaul and I had to evacuate the Academy. All my Auditors are stuck in Las Vegas with the damn Black Sun, and apparently I also lost the Far Shores to Emily Muir.” Rebecca sobbed into Mitsuru’s shirt. “I suck! I didn’t want this stupid job in the first place!”
“Don’t take it so personally,” Mitsuru said. “Things will get better.”
“Will they?”
“Everyone keeps telling me I died,” Mitsuru said. “Here I am anyway. That must be a good sign.”
“I’m so fucking happy you aren’t dead,” Rebecca said, finally letting go of Mitsuru, and then wiping her nose on her sleeve. “I’ve never felt so bad about anything. I never thought I would have to do something like that.”
“You were my sponsor. They would have put me down years ago if not for you,” Mitsuru said. “You knew it might come to that.”
“I never thought it would happen. Not once,” Rebecca insisted weepily. “I always believed in you.”
“I’ll try not to disappoint you,” Mitsuru said, blushing. “Again, I guess.”
“You’re impatient to talk to me about something,” Rebecca said, blowing her nose on a printout she had found on a nearby lectern. “What’s going on?”
“It’s my protocol,” Mitsuru said, holding out her partially healed arm. “Look.”
Rebecca knew just where to look, and she did not have to ask any questions to understand.
“Oh my God, Mitzi,” Rebecca said, grabbing M
itsuru’s arm and gently touching the smooth patch of skin. “How did you do this?”
“It was an accident,” Mitsuru said. “I had a nosebleed.”
“Your protocol was always unique,” Rebecca said, her voice hushed and awed. “This is something else, though. This is really something!”
“I asked Eerie to help me,” Mitsuru said. “This is what happened.”
“What did she do to you?” Rebecca grabbed Mitsuru by her shoulders. “I need you to tell me everything. Just exactly the way it happened, okay? Everything. Go!”
Mitsuru did her best to explain, though it sounded even weirder describing it than it had felt, which, Mitsuru had to admit, was saying something, since it had felt like the setup to some very niche pornography.
“I think I understand,” Rebecca said softly. “I think maybe I know what she did.”
“Don’t just ramble, Becca. Tell me.”
“Sorry, sorry, it’s just…Eerie.” Rebecca laughed. “She’s just such a handful, you know? Her cellular structure is undifferentiated. We noticed the first time we did an exam. Blood draw, hair sample, cheek swab, it made no difference. Every cell in the girl’s body is nearly identical. They look a bit like the nanites, under a microscope, or the manufactured cells we see when we autopsy Anathema. Similar, but more obviously biological, and they have a couple microcellular structures that no one in Central had ever seen before.”
“Interesting.”
“One of those structures allows Eerie to tailor the function of the cell. It’s not a conscious process – it’s an emotional one. When she is scared, cellular function shifts to a defensive response.”
“Eerie can poison on contact,” Mitsuru said. “I remember that.”
“She doesn’t even need contact, if she’s truly frightened. And a positive emotional state will trigger the opposite reaction. She can heal people, Mitzi, assuming she likes them, and isn’t overly upset. Her cells will propagate inside of a new host, and do their thing, either kill or cure. They can be volatized and emitted from the sweat glands, like pheromones, or…”
“In saliva. The candy. I wondered about that.”
“Eerie changed you,” Rebecca said, touching Mitsuru’s shoulder gently, as if to reassure herself. “I’ll have to do some tests back at the Academy, but it’s probably permanent.”
“She said that she had made something unlikely probable, or something to that effect. She seemed more coherent than I am used to, but it was still hard to follow her.”
“She did something like this before,” Rebecca said. “I think she worked hard to keep it a secret from us.”
“What did she do to me? What can I do with this?”
“Eerie described it as the ‘opposite’ of a universal acid, right? If she didn’t mean a base, then she must have been focusing on what the black blood does. It eats through everything, right? It’s got nearly unlimited destructive potential, and it…”
“It kills,” Mitsuru said, indifference in her red eyes.
“Yeah. So, the new thing would be the opposite of that.”
Mitsuru stared at her hands, certain that she could see platinum blood running in her veins, as if her heart pumped molten metal, just for a moment.
“She told me to cheer up,” Mitsuru recalled. “I thought she was just being a brat.”
“Eerie’s abilities are dictated by her emotional state,” Rebecca said. “Perhaps yours are the same? The black blood always seemed to be connected to your anger and sadness. I hate to just say it, but the more depressed that you got, the more…”
“I cut myself,” Mitsuru said. “You don’t need to explain.”
“Yeah. You should stop doing that, you know?”
“That’s what Eerie said,” Mitsuru said, taking the sterilized knife that she reserved exclusively for herself from her belt, and weighing it thoughtfully in her palm. “What if we made a deal?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You want me to stop, right?” Mitsuru looked away. “Cutting myself.”
“Of course,” Rebecca said guardedly. “You know that. I’ve told you a million times.”
“Let’s pretend that I’ve finally heard you. Would you be willing to do something to make it happen?”
“I don’t like where this is going…”
“You won’t,” Mitsuru said, smiling for the first time since the conversation started. “You really won’t like this at all.”
“You wouldn’t do it.”
“Let’s make a deal, Becca. I’ll stop cutting myself right now. I’ll never do it again. I’ll just…I’ll find another way to cope. In return, you’ll…”
“You bitch,” Rebecca said quietly. “This is blackmail! I don’t deserve this.”
“You are my friend, and you deserve it very much. Smoking is a filthy, disgusting habit, and it’s bad for you, and it’s a bad example for the students,” Mitsuru said. “I want you to quit right now. Forever. Not one more cigarette.”
“Not even when I’m drinking?” Rebecca gave her a desperate look. “You’re insane. That’s just cruel.”
“I don’t want you to smoke pot anymore, either. We need to get you one of those vaporizers.”
“What are you, my mom?”
“I’m your friend. Right?”
“You fucking know it,” Rebecca said, head in hands. “I don’t wanna quit!”
“I don’t really want to stop, either,” Mitsuru agreed, touching her remaining scars. “That’s why we’ll do this together.”
Rebecca swore in an obscene blend of gutter Hebrew and private school Spanish.
Mitsuru waited it out.
“Fine. Fucking fine!” Rebecca stood. “I’ll do it. Starting tomorrow, I’ll…”
“Becca,” Mitsuru said. “Now.”
Rebecca howled in frustration.
“Okay, okay,” she muttered, grimacing as she dropped her empty pack of cigarettes on the ground, and then crushed it beneath her heel. She extended her hand to Mitsuru. “Let’s do it.”
Mitsuru tossed the knife into some nearby bushes, and then shook Rebecca’s hand.
“Enough of this shit,” Rebecca growled. “Back to business.”
“Good idea,” Mitsuru said. “What do we do first?”
“We find that knife you just threw into the bushes outside a residential building, and dispose of it safely before someone gets hurt,” Rebecca said, glaring at her. “That’s first.”
“Ah.” Mitsuru stifled a grin. “Of course.”
“Then we find Alistair,” Rebecca said, stomping over to the bush in question. “I don’t mind telling you, I fully intend to take all my frustrations out on him, whether he deserves it or not.”
Twenty
Day Four
Eerie burst from the door like a jack-in-the-box in response to his knock, and then recoiled just as quickly when she recognized him.
Vivik did not take it personally. He was good at that.
“Hi, Eerie,” he said, concealing his surprise at finding her in her pajamas in the mid-afternoon, and belatedly wishing he had checked a window before walking to the dorms. “I hope I didn’t wake you.”
“I was awake,” Eerie said, halfway hiding behind the door. “Alex is out, but we are meeting for dinner.”
“That’s okay,” Vivik said. “I wanted to talk to you.”
“Because I got mad at you?”
“Yeah. Because of that.”
“You messed up my club,” Eerie said petulantly. Her hair was flattened on one side, but flared out like a wing on the other, and she was wearing one of Alex’s T-shirts, which stretched to mid-thigh and concealed whatever else she might have had on. “You were on Emily’s side the whole time.”
“I was on your side, too,” Vivik said. “I never did anything but help.”
“You were helping her, too. Then she joined my club, and I had to invite her! Just to be nice! To be friends!” The words came spilling out of her with manic intensity that Vivik h
ad not seen for some time, tumbling from her lips each on the heels of the last, punctuated by too-frequent gasps. “Then she rescued Alex! She was there when he woke up! She brought him here, and all I did was show up! And you helped her!”
“Eerie, calm down,” Vivik said. “That’s not how it happened.”
“Maybe not,” Eerie said, clinging to the door as she caught her breath. “It’s how it ended up, though. I like Emily, but I’m not happy with Alex and Emily. Emily meddles. She’s probably doing that, right now.”
“I can’t argue with that. Emily means well, but she does get involved in everyone else’s business.”
“You see? Everything! Everything is her business!”
“I don’t think Emily would do anything to hurt you,” Vivik said, wishing he were a little more certain. “I wouldn’t let her, if she tried. I’m on your side, Eerie. I’m sorry I couldn’t be completely honest with you from the start, but I didn’t lie. You and Alex are my friends.” He had practiced all of this, that morning, before coming here, but now that she was standing in front of him, flustered and dismayed, the words sounded hollow. “You are both very important to me. I hope you feel the same way about me.”
Eerie hugged him.
“Don’t be stupid,” Eerie said. “I wouldn’t be angry if I didn’t like you. You were always nice.”
“Thanks, Eerie,” he said, blushing and very aware of her partial state of undress. He was careful not to put his arms around her. “That means a lot.”
She froze as realization struck her, her arms still around his waist.
She bolted back inside of Alex’s dorm room, the door slamming behind her.
“I’m not dressed appropriately!” Eerie shouted, over the sounds of crashing and stomping on the other side of the door. “Give me a minute!”
“I’ll meet you downstairs,” Vivik yelled back. “Take your time.”
He waited for about ten minutes in the lobby, and then went outside, wishing that the sun could break through the eternal fog of Central, just once.
He had spent too long in Central, he thought, and was starting to miss the basic things, like the feeling of the sun on his skin. The light that struggled through the perpetual clouds felt so weak in comparison to the fierce radiance of the Punjabi sun when he visited his family on holiday, or the somewhat more subdued glare in the summer in California’s Central Valley, and he felt cold, all the time. He had taken to bundling himself in jackets and flannel, and wearing a thicker turban, but none of it seemed to help.
The Church of Sleep (Central Series Book 5) Page 51