by Sierra Riley
If it comes back, it’s yours. If it doesn’t… it never was.
Gabriel was different, wasn’t he? He had to believe that.
So why was this ending the same fucking way, even after all he’d done to swear off dating, to never let this happen again?
29
Gabriel
Most Mondays started the same way these days: with a call to Austin, his new manager. And most Mondays ended the same way: at the bottom of a vodka bottle.
He wasn’t an alcoholic by any means, but a fifth wasn’t that hard to get through by the end of another weekend without any parties to attend, or with only parties surrounded by people whispering about him behind his back. Or to his face.
Fuck, it was a whole month later, and he’d been bitterly, utterly right about the trajectory of his career.
But so had Briar. Austin hadn’t been able to pull him back from this one. The other guys he’d brought over were all getting work.
But not Gabriel.
That meant only one thing: he was shot.
And he was broke. A month wasn’t much time in which to go through his savings, but they were dwindling fast somehow. Between credit card bills from boutique spending sprees—and he’d be fucked before he’d let them get a penny of interest—and paying back his own expenses…
Shit, this was an awful, sinking realization.
He’d fucked around and wasted the best opportunity of his life.
It hadn’t taken long before Sandra had figured out what was going on, but there was no offer she could make that wasn’t just insulting. Help him get another admin job somewhere? Help her with her sewing business? Anything would be a step down from where he’d been.
And where he was, in some ways. That cologne commercial? It had still gone ahead, possibly as Gabe’s last big claim to fame.
So his face was plastered on bus stops and rolled across glitzy electronic signs now and then when he looked at them. He hated the sinking, wretched feeling in the pit of his stomach every time he saw himself in one of those damn things.
He’d had a couple jobs, sure, since joining Austin’s agency, which was simply called Austin. Worst name ever.
But nothing could regain the momentum he’d once had.
Austin still called that Friday evening, just to check in. He still didn’t love the guy or anything, but he could kind of see his point about certain things. Briar hadn’t denied destroying his career… and Briar had never told him he wanted more. Maybe Austin and Briar had used each other more than Briar admitted in public.
“Hey, man.”
“Hello,” he answered Austin. “So…”
“Nothing, man. Sorry. It’s getting pretty tough. But come on, come over to my house. We’ll talk about your next career move.”
Austin was working day and night as the manager for all the models, plus holding the position of CEO. Jordan was working as the face of the agency and wasn’t around much—they’d never even met face to face, and the office was a small but clean one on the other side of Central Park from Exposed, thank God.
Less risk of running into Briar.
That last fuck—the hottest one he’d ever had in his life, and the one he jerked off to just about every night?
God, he’d kill for that again, but that was just another regret to get drunk over if he let himself.
He wasn’t going to be the broke, angry model who resented the world. At least, he’d try to stave that off.
“Okay. I’ll be over in half an hour,” Gabriel told his boss and hung up, then sorted through his closet. He didn’t even feel like wearing any of the shit in there.
It all felt like it belonged to a guy who was a lot more successful than him, and less of a fuck-up. Not the kind of guy who would crash and burn so hard there were memes in modeling circles’ Facebook groups about him.
He leaned against the pole in the bus as he waited for the right stop, his eyes half-closed. It was supposed to be less painful soon, wasn’t it?
What kind of career moves did Austin have in mind? Ad campaigns? He could probably do that. That was the last stage in a guy’s career, but by this point…
It was getting obvious he was being shunted out, one way or another.
Surely to God it wasn’t all by that Leonard or Leopard or whatever guy, the classy druggie. No, this was a combination of factors.
But then, in dark hours, a part of him wondered if he should have done the line. At least he’d have a guaranteed gig next year, which would probably rekindle interest in him.
He suddenly understood Paulo better than ever.
Paulo had come to visit him a couple of times over the last month, but they’d only ever met somewhere else—away from the house. He still didn’t want anyone seeing his place.
He had to maintain the last vestiges of his image, tattered as it was.
“Thanks,” he muttered to the bus driver on his way out, striding down the street from the bus stop to Jordan and Austin’s place.
God, he hoped Jordan was out again. Austin seemed to be keeping them separated, just as he’d promised. That, at least, was a relief.
When he knocked on the door and Austin pulled it open, Gabriel jerked his head in a quick nod.
Austin held the door for him. “Come on in, darling. How have you been?” He cast a critical eye up and down Gabriel’s outfit, but Gabriel really didn’t give a fuck if his new manager told him off for not having the right accessories. He was lucky he was getting out of bed at all.
“Okay,” Gabriel grunted and shrugged. “Hoping you have good news soon.”
Austin sighed, then nodded. “Drink?”
“I’d love one.”
They settled in the reading room—of course they had a goddamn posh reading room. One of them was definitely from some kind of rich family.
Not the kind of family that gave him well-meaning lectures on how he was going to destroy his life by fucking men and preening for men, driving him to leave the very first day he could, that was for damn sure.
Gabriel tamped that down, too, and put on his impassive mask. Too much risk he’d have a meltdown otherwise, and he couldn’t do that in public.
Eventually, conversation turned to Briar.
“I have to say… I’m impressed with how well you’re holding up,” Austin admitted. “Um, I thought after Briar…”
“What about him?” Gabriel asked flatly.
Austin winced. “Well, it was… sort of a mutually unhealthy relationship. It’s a bit painful to leave a situation like that.”
Gabriel nodded slightly. “I imagine.”
“If you start feeling like you have to talk…”
Gabriel laughed under his breath. Christ, if only anyone had told him that and meant it just a month ago, this whole shit show could have been avoided. Then, he shook his head. “Nah.”
Austin slid closer to Gabriel on the couch, then reached out and put a hand on his knee. “You’ve seemed pretty out of sorts, even to someone who doesn’t know you well.”
Gabriel paused for a minute, swirling the whisky in the glass for a long minute and absently noting the rum and raisin notes in it.
The fucking life had ruined him for cheap booze, too.
What would he say: that he missed Austin’s ex, that he wanted to fuck his brains out but also learn what and who he was outside of work? That he’d totally blown his chance to have it all?
And then, Austin’s hand was running up the inside of his thigh toward his groin.
Gabriel froze, but he grabbed Austin’s hand just before it got to his cock and pushed it away.
Austin seemed as startled as him. “You don’t…?”
“No,” Gabriel breathed out. “No, I don’t.”
“Oh, shit. Okay.” Austin backed off, folding his arms again and shaking his head. “I totally misread that.” But the way he apologized wasn’t that wholehearted. He’d never actually said sorry.
Gabriel hadn’t been touched like that—like he was desira
ble, an object to be prized—in weeks now.
He didn’t know why he hadn’t just gone and found some other guy to fill that need after the… breakup, or whatever… but he hadn’t.
A sick part of him wanted Austin to keep going, just so he could feel like he had something valuable in him again.
But then, he saw Briar’s face in his mind.
“I can’t. I want to go.”
“Where?”
That was a cruel reminder: he had no work to get to, no friends to see. Paulo was busy in Sao Paulo or Singapore or something. Jon and Adam were out on a tour. His other friends? Acquaintances that were gone now, like they’d never known him.
But there was someone whose door would always be open to him. His gut instinct told him that.
“To see Briar.”
Austin’s expression turned ugly in a heartbeat. “You really wanna never work again? I thought I’d done a good enough job of that.”
The color drained from Gabriel’s cheeks. “What?”
“But I’ve got the next cologne season now. That’s the main thing taken care of. Jordan’s collaborating with them in their show. It’s all settled.”
Gabriel felt sick.
Had he been so sorry for himself all month that he’d missed the wheels and cogs in motion all around him? Was he really that naive?
Fuck, he wasn’t just stupid, but he kept being stupid.
He was a pawn in their games, in their shitty lifestyle, unless he did something.
And there was one thing he could think of, and he thought the man would be enough of a good man to accept it.
He was rising to his feet when Austin rose, too. “Wait. There’s one thing I haven’t told you about.”
“When’s rent due? You got it covered?”
For a moment, he sounded compassionate, but Gabriel caught himself before he bought in. The cold ease with which he’d just told him he’d used the fuck out of him stopped him from believing it now.
“What business is it of yours? You’d be happier if I didn’t,” Gabriel snapped.
“I have one event for you,” Austin told him. “I was gonna do it, but it’s… a bit beneath me now.”
Gabriel ground his teeth. He wished he could be certain Briar would have his back, but he really couldn’t blame him if he turned his back on him for turning his back on him in turn.
“What is it?” he managed at last.
That was the killing blow to his ego: not being able to walk out on the asshole on the spot, because he needed the money too much.
“A cocktail party. They want a couple hot models. Underwear-only. You’d be the centerpiece. Maybe even get some tips if you wear a hot G-string.”
Just this one job. Just to pay rent. Then I go to Briar.
As Gabriel leaned on the bus shelter, it took everything he had not to throw up beside it.
30
Briar
It had already been a fucking month of avoiding Austin, and in New York City, that was a momentous task. To be fair, he’d had plenty of help from certain people—Vince and Julius, mainly, but pretty much everyone in the company seemed to know what had happened.
Thankfully, nobody had the balls to talk about it to his face.
As much as Briar wanted to think it was just life back to normal, there was a Gabe-shaped hole in it. No more sneaking off to visit him at every event, no flying with him to or from foreign climes, no peeking in on him in the in-house photo studio…
But it was about fucking time he get out. Avoiding ritzy parties wasn’t going to win him any new clients, and he couldn’t afford to lose the momentum Exposed had built.
Losing Gabriel had been a giant blow to his reputation, but not to his bank balance. Gabriel’s bookings had been going down before he jumped ship. And now, nobody seemed to even remember the guy they’d been fawning over just last month.
It was the weirdest thing… and oddly insulting, on Gabe’s behalf.
What he wasn’t expecting when he walked through the door of the two-floor luxury penthouse suite with the indoor waterfall and pools was to see Gabriel posing, in his underwear, in the middle of the pool, the waterfall behind him.
Briar’s chest seized tight as he stared at Gabe for a second, then tore his eyes away out of a weird sense of… respect? Decency?
Then, he noticed it wasn’t stopping anyone else.
The last thing he saw before he saw red was Austin and Jordan.
Specifically, Jordan running his hand up Gabriel’s chest while he stood beside him on the smooth tile of the living room floor, Gabriel in the water.
Austin, by his side, was laughing, saying something about his guys and how fit they were, but Briar didn’t give a shit.
The moment he saw that look in Gabriel’s eye—the one where his eyes were flickering around the room, that defiant spark gone, his chin down and shoulders forward…
Something was wrong, and fuck them both if they thought they’d get away with that bullshit.
“Oh, shit. Briar—” someone started, but he pushed past them and stormed toward Austin.
Austin turned and raised his brows, just in time for Briar to grab him by the shoulders and give him a quick, hard shove.
Right into the water.
The room exploded with exclamations, curses, and a couple of guys trying to pull Briar back, but he shoved them off and slapped Jordan across the face.
“You’ve been fucking him over all this time, haven’t you? This last month? Knocking him so low he doesn’t have a choice but do this for you. How can you live with yourself?”
The water was only a few inches deep, but Austin’s pretty little jeans and cap-sleeved shirt were soaked now as he hauled himself upright and out of the water and came at Briar, until a couple guys grabbed him, too. “Same way you can live with yourself for telling lies about me, asshole.”
Jordan was reeling silently, his hand pressed to his cheek, his eyes wide.
That sound had cracked Gabriel’s model façade, and he was watching from the corner of his eye.
“Yeah, maybe you weren’t a thief then, but you’re more than that now,” Briar growled right back at Austin. His heart was pounding, and it was all he could do not to fall to punches. “If any of you pretend you didn’t see the look on Gabriel’s face that I saw the second I walked in…”
The guests fell into an uncomfortable silence.
“Yeah, I thought so,” Briar spat out. He held out a hand to Gabriel, ignoring both the others.
Austin knocked his hand away. “He’s mine now, man.”
Jordan gave him a sideways glance.
“I’ll get him out of the contract as fast as you got him out of mine,” Briar sneered. “Was it signed when you were drunk?”
“Technically…” Austin started.
“That’s bullshit,” Jordan hissed.
“I’m asking Gabriel.” Briar turned away from them as Austin waded out of the pool and took off his shoes to empty them back into the pool. Briar just watched Gabriel.
Gabriel hesitated, his gaze finally focusing on him instead of the neutral, professional mid-distance stare of a model. Then, he nodded.
“I thought so.”
Briar extended his hand once more to Gabriel, who glanced down at him.
“Fuck you,” Jordan spat. “You can’t have him.”
Gabriel stepped out of the pool and took Briar’s arm. “Yes, he can.” Gabriel’s voice was soft but distinct, contrasting his gaze. His eyes bored holes through that little asshole. He turned, then, and looked straight at Briar. “Yes, you can.”
Briar hadn’t known he’d been so desperate to hear those words, but now that he did, they felt so utterly right. They were both watching each other still, completely ignoring Austin and Jordan despite whatever they were blathering about now.
And Gabriel was smiling at him—that soft, open, vulnerable smile, not his fake model smile.
This is him. He’s back.
Briar hauled him in for
a quick, hard hug, sliding his arms around his back. Briar glared over Gabriel’s shoulder at every damn one of them who dared stand in judgment and whisper about the party host who’d paid all that money. “You’re coming home with me.”
The answer blew him away.
“I’ve been waiting long enough.”
Briar slid off his jacket and stood behind Gabriel to help him put it on, one arm at a time. Gabriel zipped it up, and then he took Briar’s arm again as they walked silently to the door.
Neither Austin nor Jordan seemed to have a word to say, but there would be hundreds—thousands of gossip-filled words in the days to come. Briar was sure of that.
He also didn’t care.
31
Gabriel
The limo ride home was relatively quiet. Briar said something to the driver, who looked startled but scrambled out of the car to open the door for them both.
Then they were sliding into the seat next to each other in the back, and Gabriel was so glad Briar chose the seat next to him. He leaned into him while Briar wrapped an arm tightly around his shoulders.
Briar had looked so furious, and not in the cold, harsh way of being screwed over on a contract. It was something a lot hotter that had made him slap Jordan so hard the crack had echoed through the room.
That simple gesture had given Gabriel breathing room, made him feel less like he was his ex’s bitch and more like he was… his own person. Free, like when he’d first signed with Exposed.
“You okay?” Gabriel murmured.
Briar laughed breathily, and his hand rose to idly stroke the hair at the back of Gabriel’s head. “I should be asking you that, Gabe. I’m fine.”
“Seeing Austin again…” It occurred to Gabriel that he didn’t really know how Briar felt about him. The public split had been nasty, but nobody had been gossiping about whether Briar’s heart was really Austin’s or not.
“Seeing Jordan,” Briar countered, but his tone was gentle. He leaned forward to rummage in one of the limo’s compartments.