by T. S. Joyce
“Jeremy,” she muttered, his name like a curse on her lips.
“Is a bear shifter too.”
“Of course he is.” Suddenly the roar she heard the night she was shot made sense. In fact, all of the strange things that had been happening were starting to make sense.
She made to march off through the brush, but Riker grabbed her arm and spun her around. “Is this where you run from me?” he asked low. His eyes were hard as he searched her face, and the slightest hint of worry sat in the hard planes of his frown.
“Like you ran from me last night?” He didn’t answer so she spat out, “How’s Merit?”
Eyes wide and baffled, he said, “I don’t know. Why? Was she messing with you?”
“Not like she was messing with you last night. Got mad so you ran off to her place, leaving me to sob myself to sleep over someone who doesn’t deserve my tears. Did you choose already? Hmm, Benton Riker?” Full name. That’s right. He was in trouble and best he knew it.
“I didn’t go to Merit’s place. I slept in the woods and woke early for a meeting. I’ve been working all day. I haven’t seen Merit since she stormed Castle Alpha last night.”
Hannah was scared to hope and she crossed her arms defensively. “Liar.” She tested the word but it tasted bitter in her mouth. “You swear you didn’t take her?”
Stepping forward, he splayed his legs so he was more her height and tugged her wrists until her shield shattered. “Didn’t want to taste anyone but you, Hannah.”
Maybe it was the severe adrenaline crash, or perhaps the pain from trying to escape a bear fight wounded, or perhaps it was the silk that caressed his words, but she melted against him and released a shuddering sigh. “I spent the whole night imagining you with her.”
He wrapped his arms around her slowly, as if he didn’t want to frighten her. “So let me get this straight. You just found out I turn into a bear, and you’re jealous because you thought I spent the night with another woman?”
“Don’t make me sound petty. I wanted to work it out and you left me to imagine the worst. So yeah, my human insecurities seem a lot easier to deal with and get out of the way than the werebear mind grenade. And stop squeezing me so tight. You’re getting blood on my shirt and it’s one of the only ones I have left.”
A rumbling sound purred from his chest, hummed against her cheek. “I want you marked. And since you aren’t up for doing it the way I want, this is what you get. Ruined shirts.”
Crooking a finger under her chin, he lifted her gaze. Smoothing her hair from her face, he brushed his lips against hers, once. Twice. Three times and held. His fingertips tickled down her jaws and neck, and she gasped as he lifted her shirt over her head.
“What are you doing?” she breathed.
“I’m asking you again.”
His slow smile was mesmerizing and pooled warmth in her middle. “Asking me what?”
He leaned against her cheek and whispered a soft stroke against her ear. “Accept all of me. Let me claim you. I can’t choose you until I’ve had you. Give me the chance to give us a future because dammit, Hannah, I’m burning here.”
“I know your secret now, Riker. Don’t run from me again. Don’t make me question my place in your life.”
“I can’t promise I’ll be perfect, but I’ll try. Won’t stop trying until you’re happy.”
His fingers left trails of fire down her ribcage and he reached around to unfasten her bra with a quiet snick.
“Does it happen this fast for bears?” she asked against his neck.
“If it is a good pairing, then yes.” He pulled down her shorts, fingers running the length of her legs as she stepped out of them.
She smiled against the crisp smell of man and wilderness that came from his skin. “So, we’re a good pairing?”
“You scare me. I’d say that means we’re a good match.” His smile was languid as he sat back and pulled her onto his lap. “Say yes.”
“You know I’d say yes even if we’d met somewhere else, right?”
“You swear?”
She slid over him and he groaned. Her legs trembled as he filled her and she arched against him. “I swear.”
His eyes lightened as she rocked, slow at first, savoring the feeling of him inside her. As his breath turned ragged and her desperation peeked, he pulled her waist into him, bucked against her until she cried out his name.
A constant growl vibrated in his throat as they crashed against each other again and again and in the last blinding moments before release, he bellowed through gritted teeth.
Hannah collapsed against his chest, pulsing over his cock.
“Woman,” he murmured against her throat. “You drive me to madness. You know that, right?”
She nudged her cheek over the scruff on his jaw and sighed a contented little sound. “I like driving you mad.”
He chuckled deep in his chest, and the sound murmured against her breasts. Gripping her neck, he eased her back. “Hannah.” He held her gaze, seriousness drawing his dark brows down until she wanted to kiss the worry away.
“Yes, Riker?”
“I choose you.”
Chapter Eight
Hannah was putty against him.
She’d dressed and Riker had borrowed a pair of jeans from Jenny’s husband that fit a little tight in the crotch and legs. He’d assured her his injuries weren’t bad enough to call on Daria and he’d picked her up like she weighed nothing and tucked her against his chest.
His smoldering eyes on the trail, he leaned into her ear as she wrapped her arms around his neck and murmured, “I’m going to take you home and feed you, then I’m going to bathe you and bed you again. I want my scent all over you.” He trailed kisses down her neck and she giggled as he hit the ticklish spot near her nape.
“What’s this?” he asked, brushing lips over her scar. Lifting her hair, his eyes went wide and he nearly dropped her. “What is that?” he asked again, setting her upright.
Nothing in her wanted to explain where she’d got it. That night haunted her enough without her revisiting it. “It’s just a scar.”
Riker pulled his arms behind his back and took the formal stance he’d had when she’d met him the first time. Walking quietly beside her, they entered the clearing where a row of cabins sat. As others waved and greeted him, he nodded and offered polite smiles, but his look was a million miles away.
He was mad, or perhaps disappointed, she didn’t know. She’d been hurt when he’d shut her down and now she was doing the same. That kind of hurt was something she’d never wish on him.
“I had a sister,” she said, testing the words to see if she could tell the story without breaking down.
Properly, he held a hand out and helped her up the steps to his house. “What happened to her?”
A grasshopper waited on the door frame and she brushed it away as Riker turned the knob. “She died the night I got the scar. She’d been dating a man who turned out to be the death of her. Her type had always been bad boys, but Lance Boyd was another beast altogether. We never guessed how deep in he was until he double crossed his boss, Amos Stone. Stone’s revenge was to make Lance watch his loved ones die. He came for Marian on a Sunday, just in time for our family dinner. We were all collateral damage.”
“How’d you get away?”
She swallowed to steady the tremble in her voice. “One of the neighbors called the cops when they heard us screaming. Stone and most of his men were already gone, but he left one to torture us. He marked our necks first. Said it was his calling card.” Her voice faltered as visions of Marian assaulted her mind. She’d gone badly. Painfully. Gripping her hair, she sank into the sofa and heaved a sigh. “Marian and Lance died, but I held on long enough. When I came to, I was ruined. I used to be so...” She shook her head, searching for the right word. “Hopeful. About life and my future. Marian and I had all these plans to get married and have children around the same age so they could grow up together.” Her huff of laught
er was harsh and she drew her knees up to her chin to shield herself from the battering memories.
Riker paced behind the couch, but at her emotionless chuckle, he knelt in front of her, placed his warm hands on her knees and it worked. She settled.
“Fate had other plans for me. I was angry with the world. With Lance and his poisonous affection. At Marian for falling for that life. At myself for not seeing it sooner. At Stone. Oh, I was maddest at him. I testified. They were going to finish the job anyway, so I swore to Marian’s headstone I’d take every one of those murderous motherfuckers down with me. Didn’t think I’d ever make it to trial but Jeremy kept his promise and saw me safely there. After the next attempt on my life, three months later, I was accepted into witness protection. Stone’s reach was just as long from his prison cell. He still has enough allies on the outside to see me dead. Some cop is feeding him intel now on where my safe houses are. Jeremy and I barely escaped the last one. My other security, Jimmy, passed away in the gunfight.” She lifted her tear filled eyes and whispered, “I killed a man.”
Riker’s thumb made rhythmic circles against her leg, and his eyes looked as tortured as she felt. She was right in this, to have waited for the right person to tell. It helped not to carry the burden alone.
“How?” he asked.
“Shot him. He had a gun on me and I was on this dingy, glass riddled concrete. I’d been running but he caught me. He didn’t know Jimmy had given me a weapon and we went together. I died that night knowing I’d taken down another one of Stone’s men, and vengeance was probably the only thing that kept my body fighting while Jeremy tried to find me help. We couldn’t go to a hospital. Stone has eyes everywhere.”
“Shit, Hannah. I shouldn’t have turned you away when Jeremy brought you to me.”
Miserable, she shrugged. “You didn’t know me. No one did.”
“I don’t want you leaving here. Not until we know the danger has died down. No going into town where someone can make you. Just stay close, where I can keep you safe.”
“Okay. Now you. What does my scar mean to you?”
The barest smile crooked his lips. “We used to have a seer. She had the sight and most of the time, she was right in her predictions. When I was younger, she said a woman with a heart shaped scar would break me.”
“Break you? But I don’t want to break you.”
“I used to be afraid of you, but now I think it was a good thing. You’re changing me and maybe it’s bad, I don’t know. Maybe it means I’m weaker, but it feels right.” His finger rubbed the outline of her scar. “Jenny always thought you would be good for me. She thought I was too serious, too focused on the good of the clan and not enough on myself. I used to dream of the scar.”
“Bad dreams?”
“I thought so at the time.”
“Riker, what are we going to do about Merit?”
With an explosive sigh, he locked his fingers behind his head and sat on the couch beside her, leaned back into the cushion. “I don’t know. I don’t want anyone but you. Thinking about what I’m supposed to do gives me a sick feeling but I’m the best one to lead this clan. It’s flourished since I first challenged two years ago. I know I can do good for them.”
“So, you can’t just tell the clan you picked already?”
“Doesn’t work like that. The bear has to choose. They’ll argue I didn’t give it the options I was supposed to by law. I have to bed Merit and then tell them my decision is you before the summer solstice or I lose my position. I couldn’t ever challenge for alpha again because I would’ve broken clan law.”
Breath gusted from between her lips and she rested her feet on his lap. He massaged them as he stared at the blank television screen.
“Riker?” she asked quietly, hating the words that would tumble from her lips. “I can’t stand between you and your clan. I don’t understand the dynamics, not yet. But you’d grow to resent me if I hurt your relationship with your people. Bed Merit. Come back to me.” Closing her eyes against the nausea bubbling in her throat, she stifled the break down. He’d been kind to her when every instinct in her said it wasn’t in his nature to do so. She was special to him, she could see that. She had to give him up for a night if she wanted to see him happy. And she was so damned tired of cursing her loved ones’ happiness.
“And you’ll resent me if I bed her.” His eye twitched and she fought the urge to press her thumb over the tick and settle the stressed muscle. “You’ll think of us. Of what I did to her and it would poison us. You aren’t like the women around here. Love and sex are synonymous for you and you’d question my feelings for Merit.”
She didn’t answer, couldn’t answer. Her throat was full of denial but she couldn’t release the lie. As much as she’d try to get over it, every time she saw Merit, it would burn.
“We have two weeks.” He pulled her into his side and stroked her arm. “No decision needs to be made tonight.” At her sniffle, he jerked his attention to her. “Why the tears?”
“I’m just scared I’ll lose you and I’m so damned tired of being scared.”
“Hey,” he said, a growl in his voice. “I’m not going anywhere. You’re a strong woman, Hannah. Your life experience has taught you resilience. You’re a survivor and I swear to you, we’ll figure this out.”
His fist tightened in her hair and he pulled her lips to his. Her arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer until she was burrowed against him. Warmth radiated from his smooth skin and even his warning growl when she pressed against his injury was half-hearted. Clearly, he needed to feel her devotion too.
Lifting her, he hauled her to the bedroom and set her on the mattress. Urgent hands ripped her blood stained shirt from her shoulders and he dragged her bra away as soon as he was able. The zipper to her shorts ripped slowly before he pulled them off. Fingers fumbling, she helped him shed his pants and stretched up to kiss him. Gripping the sheets, she arched her back until her breasts touched his chest and he closed his lips over hers.
“You’re so damned beautiful,” he growled, gripping her ribs and rubbing a thumb under her breast. “Tell me something. Anything you want and I’ll make it happen for putting you through this.” Nudging her legs apart, he slid into her. “Please,” he implored over her moan.
“Never run. Stay and fight for us.”
He winced and plunged deeper. “Done. I swear it.”
She grinned and giggled. “You werebear swear it?”
“Stop it.”
“Stop what?” she asked innocently.
“Making jokes right now.”
“Or what?” she said, rocking.
He pulled out of her, hovering just above her wetness. “Or I’ll punish you.”
A frail whimper escaped as she pressed against him, only for him to retreat with a wicked smile on his face.
“Your pout is irresistible.” He sucked on her bottom lip until it felt swollen. Plunging into her again, she cried out. His teeth grazed her shoulder and she leaned into his bite. A few strokes more and he spilled into her as her center shattered from the inside out.
Screaming his name, she raked her nails down his back.
“My bear,” she sighed as he pulled the covers over them and curled around her. She’d never felt so safe and adored in all her life.
Riker was warm, solid and strong. Able to shoulder anything, including the burdens she’d gifted when she’d opened up to him earlier. He didn’t run from her struggles, but touched her, eased her fears. Bear or man, he was hers and she his.
He nuzzled her ear until she smiled.
“My mate,” he rumbled.
Chapter Nine
The setting sun was doing an awesome job of shooting Hannah in the closed eyeball with a single obnoxious ray. Pulling the covers over her head, she escaped and tumbled onto the cold patch of bed where Riker should’ve been.
When she lifted her head to search the room for him, a note fluttered in the breeze against his pillow.
Dut
y calls. Meet at Jenny’s for dinner at six. I’ll try to get away.
Benson
Benson? How formal and cute. The alarm clock that shadowed the bedside table read 5:40. Swallowing her disappointment at Riker not being here when she woke up, she rolled from the bed and blanched at the full-length mirror that hung from his closet door. Okay, thank God he wasn’t here to see her in all of her post nap glory. Rifling through her duffle bag, she pulled everything that might be appropriate to wear for a family dinner. She was nervous about meeting Jenny again, like seeing her naked in the forest didn’t count as bonding time. But she’d turned into a freaking bear. A bear. Gulping, Hannah clenched her hands to steady them. Riker was a bear. A werebear, and so was his sister and so was everyone else in this valley. Actual, furry, clawed, toothy, terrifying bears.
The high of shock had definitely worn off.
Sitting heavily, she pulled a pair of jean shorts from the bag and covered her chilled lap with them. She hadn’t thought terrible people like Stone and his men existed either, but they did. Her life and beliefs had already been turned upside down. She could handle another flip flop.
Besides, Riker might be scary as hell, but he wouldn’t hurt her. She felt it down to her marrow, he’d never hurt her. Not on purpose. And if Jeremy was a werebear like Riker said he was, he’d been protecting her for an entire year and hadn’t even once eaten her in her sleep. And this clan was trying to make their way in the world outside the confines of cities and human societies.
They were good.
No.
Yes, they were definitely good.
Except for Merit. Merit could jump in a volcano.
Options limited, she tugged on her least holey pair of jeans and a pink cotton shirt that hugged her curves like a second skin. Sneakers tied, she jogged through the front door and hoped she remembered where Jenny and her husband lived.