by T. S. Joyce
Hands clenched against the cold sink, he wanted to rip it from the wall and tear the whole damned house to the ground. His bear roared inside of him, urged him to go back to his mate and bed Hannah until she screamed his name. He closed his eyes and fought against the remembered moans that drifted from her lips as he’d tasted her slick folds. Hannah had no place in this house. Not with what he was about to do.
Turning away from his disgusted reflection, he threw open the bathroom door. Merit stood in the soft lamp light of her tidy bedroom with a black, transparent lace nighty and nothing underneath. Her heavy breasts pressed against the thin material and she spread her legs slowly.
Cameron and the others filed in and sat in a trio of chairs Merit must have set up against her bedroom wall. Well, this wasn’t awkward at all. “Do they really have to be here?”
“Yes.”
He ran his hands through his hair until his scalp tingled, then sat on the bed. “Let’s get this over with.”
“Oh, no,” Merit said with a seductive crimson smile. “If this is the only night you’ll allow me, there will be no getting it over with.”
A snarl ripped through his throat and he wanted to choke the life out of the woman. Hannah was back with Jenny thinking God knows what, and he’d witnessed the heartbreak in her eyes when he left. Merit was wasting his fucking time.
Pointing to the bed beside him, he gritted out, “Let’s go.”
“No, alpha. Tonight you’ll submit to me.” Merit pushed his chest with her red clawed finger and he fell backward trying to rid himself of her touch. His bear writhed uncomfortably inside of him and he steadied his breath. He could do this. Just ignore the men in the room. He wouldn’t dishonor Hannah by imagining her during sex with Merit, but he sure as fuck was going to imagine he was anywhere but here.
“I want to play a game,” she mused, sauntering to her bedside table and pulling the drawer. Out came a set of ties and she went to work at complicated looking knots against the posts of the headboard.
“That’s not going to work for me,” he growled, trying his damnedest not to look at the men in the corner. He hoped they were taking notes on how to avoid women who mess with men’s heads.
“It works for me,” she said with an arrogant shrug. “And if you want this finished, it’ll work for you too.”
Red rage filled him as she lifted his arm and tied it tightly in place. He felt at a disadvantage, and his bear rumbled discontent inside of him.
Before tying the next, she brushed her lips against his neck and whispered, “Tell me you choose me.”
His brain was fogged with the haze of anger and confusion. The snarling bear inside of him didn’t make thinking straight any easier, and her words were muddled, bouncing around in his head as he strained against the binding. He couldn’t do this.
The ties were too tight. Cutting off his circulation. Hurting him.
He couldn’t do this to Hannah.
“Say it,” she hissed against the sensitive edge of his earlobe.
“What?” he asked, trying to hear over the roaring in his ears.
“Say you choose me. Say it loud enough for the witnesses to hear it and I’ll end this.”
Her words made no sense. Why would he say that? He didn’t choose her. Oh God, he was trapped and every time he moved away from her, she followed him. Half delirious, he pulled on the ties, testing their strength against his.
“Say it,” she commanded. “Say it now.”
“What?”
“Say you choose me. Choose me!”
“I can’t fucking do this,” he whispered. “I can’t do it. Don’t touch me. I choose Hannah. Cameron! Fuck. Merit, if you don’t stop touching me, I promise you bad things are going to happen, and I don’t want to hurt anyone. Stop!” He was at the edge of what the tie would allow and Merit was trying to straddle him. Trapped. He was trapped and his bear was shredding his insides.
His numbing hands and fury at the realization of her plan were what snapped the bear from him. Human skin ripping, he tore apart from the inside out, the beast roaring as he destroyed him.
Merit screamed.
Chapter Eleven
Unable to stay at Jenny’s under her and Blaine’s pitied stares, Hannah had begged to go back to Riker’s house, so she could mentally prepare herself for when he came back. Things would be different and she needed some alone time to figure out her feelings.
Blaine, in true gentleman’s fashion, had offered to walk her back, and she’d happily taken him up on the offer. Visions of Bralan’s murderous fury still haunted her whenever she blinked. Plus, it was full dark now and Jenny’s house had been hard enough to find during the daytime.
She thanked the powers that be for her tennis shoes as she dodged roots and branches across the trail but when Blaine offered his arm, she accepted. The man acted like he could see in the dark, but likely he’d just walked every trail of this place so often, he knew them like the backs of his eyelids.
“What do your human friends think about you living in Bear Valley?” she asked, her voice sounding loud in the quiet of the night.
“They don’t think anything. I don’t talk about where I live,” he admitted. “I don’t invite people over and if people ask, I just tell them I live in the middle of nowhere and like my privacy. They’ve met Jenny, but she’s the outdoorsy type. It’s easy for people to assume she’s happy with a rural life rather than we live with a clan of bear shifters. You’ll have to do the same with human friends you make. To protect Riker and his people, you’ll have to completely separate those two parts of your life.”
She couldn’t imagine that being a problem since Jeremy was the closest person to a friend she’d had in a while. Running for her life tended to limit the amount of friendship bracelets and BFF lanyards she received.
A roar filled the night, chilling her blood until she froze in place. A terror filled scream followed and Blaine was already running in the direction of the noise. No way did she want to see what caused such horrifying noises, but she was sure as sugar not getting left behind in the dark woods either.
By the time they reached the small house, yelling could be heard as clear as a bell and the short, sharp bellows of a bear rang against the building, loud enough that Hannah was surprised it hadn’t blown to the ground yet. From the way the walls rattled, total destruction was imminent.
Barreling through the door, Blaine turned and tried to shove her back out into the night. “Hannah, you don’t want to see this.”
Confused, she peeked around his shoulder and wrenched away from his iron grip. Merit stood mostly naked in black negligee, and Cameron and the other men were trying to calm a giant bear. Except he’d been tied to a bed post and had ripped the entire headboard off. One strap hung from his wrist, too tight, and the other connected the bear with the still attached headboard.
He. Was. Pissed.
The scene didn’t make sense. If Merit was here, then—.
“Riker?”
Merit spun and jabbed a finger at her. “You get out of my house. We aren’t finished yet.”
Stunned, Hannah stared at the manacles cutting off circulation from his paws. Cameron and the others had quieted and looked nothing short of ashamed and it hit her.
“Oh,” Hannah said dangerously calm. “You are so fucking finished with what you tried to do here.” The wily she-devil had tried to force Riker to choose her, and in front of Cameron and the others so it couldn’t be taken back. She glared at Merit, shaking with fury. “Get out.”
“You can’t kick me out of my own house. Cameron, tell her I’m well within my rights—”
“Cameron,” Hannah warned, “if you utter a word about how she has the right to do this to Riker, I’ll slit your neck. Get. Out.”
“Merit,” Cameron said. “Leave until we can get him Changed and out of here.”
“But that wasn’t my turn. We didn’t finish. I want my full turn!”
With a stout yank, Blaine pulled her k
icking and screeching from the house, and the others followed until it was just Hannah and Riker the Bear in the small space.
“I have to untie you,” she said in a quivering voice. Fear and anger tended to make her sound like she was on a wooden roller coaster.
His lip pulled back in a snarl and she closed her eyes. He wouldn’t hurt her. He wouldn’t. “What she did was horrible, but it didn’t work. Come back to me, Riker. Let me untie you.”
Raging eyes, so dilated they were black, stared soullessly back at her. His shoulders, scarred from fighting, flexed as he shifted his weight one step closer.
“Please, Riker.”
Heavily, he sat and stared at the ties like he hadn’t noticed them before. Slowly, he drew his sad gaze back to her and in an instant, Changed into the human Riker whose skin she thirsted to touch, just to reassure herself he was okay.
His chest heaved like he’d run a great distance, and his face looked nothing short of haunted, but his eyes weren’t empty anymore, and right now, that was something worth focusing on.
“Hannah.” His voice sounded raspy, like he hadn’t used it in days.
She rushed to him. “I’m here.” With shaking fingers, she pulled and tugged at the impossibly tight knots until they loosened and he was able to slip his chafed wrists from them. She wanted to maim Merit in seven different ways for doing this.
“I shouldn’t have come here.” His voice was hoarse and tortured. “I couldn’t go through with it. You’d hate me and I couldn’t bear it. If I lose alpha, fine, but you’d hate me if I bedded her. You should hate me for even considering it.”
“No,” she said, pulling his face to meet the seriousness in her eyes. “No, I don’t. You were trying to do what you thought was best for your people. I...”
Rubbing his wrists, he growled, “Say it.”
“I just met you.”
“Say what you mean. You’re fearless, Hannah. You’re tougher than iron or you wouldn’t be sitting here in front of me, offering salvation to a man who doesn’t deserve it. Say it.”
Lifting her chin, she whispered, “I love you,” through trembling lips. “I love you even more now that you denied Merit and risked your rank for me. Now, can we go home?”
He searched her face like he’d never seen it before, like he’d never get enough, and it tore at her. A whisper of hope swam in the gray ocean of his gaze and she stood.
She was going to break down if he didn’t move soon. “I need to get you home, Riker. Please. I think you’ve had enough betrayal and mishandling for one night and I’m thoroughly sick of everyone right now.”
She slipped her hand into his as they left the hell Merit had created. Once outside, the light from the heavy moon was enough to see the milling bystanders. The crowd had grown, and Riker’s voice sounded much stronger when he said, “I’ve made my choice. Hannah is my mate. And as alpha, I move that we immediately revisit the clan laws that would have a clan member sleep with multiple women unwillingly to hold a rank. We can vote the old law out of effect now, or wait until tomorrow at an official council meeting.”
Cameron stepped forward. “I vote we rewrite the mating laws.”
“I second it,” another man said, raising two fingers.
The vote was unanimous and Hannah wanted to cry that an ancient clan of bear shifters had shifted their way of thinking because of the change she’d started in Riker.
Cameron spoke up. “The vote stands six to zero, and the laws will be rewritten first thing in the morning at the council meeting. Hannah,” he said, turning to her. An apologetic smile took his face. “Congratulations.”
Riker pulled her hand into the air and she was overwhelmed as the crowd surged forward and shook her hand, clapped Riker on the back, and congratulated them.
“You still have until the summer solstice to choose,” Merit said. She looked unhinged, hair mussed and eyes wild.
“The choice is made,” he said, shoving past her.
He didn’t say a word as he led Hannah back to his house and she didn’t know how to feel. He’d just declared her his mate and intertwined their fates thoroughly. No matter who came after her now, her life would be here, with Riker and his people. Fear at how intensely she felt about him, confusion over how devoted she’d become, happiness that he’d chosen her, anger at Merit for her treachery. All of it churned up in her until she was full of silt and ash and unable to settle on an emotion.
He pulled her into his house and didn’t even turn on the light before he rounded on her. His arms crashed around her, lifting her off the ground and clamping her tightly to his chest. She thought he’d push for more, to relieve himself of whatever memories Merit had forced onto him, but he didn’t. Instead, he just held her like he never wanted to let go.
“I’m sorry.” His voice was ragged. “I don’t deserve what you said back there. I don’t deserve for you to care about me.”
“You do,” she said, stroking the back of his hair.
“Come with me tomorrow. Come with me to all my meetings. See what I do. See who I really am and learn about our culture. I’ll make you happy here, Hannah. I know this isn’t where you imagined your life, but you’re mine now.” He sank to his knees and pressed his face against her stomach. “I’m yours. You can have all of me. Just don’t let what I almost did taint the way you feel about me.”
Staring at the blue moonlight streaming in through the window, tears fled her cheeks as she bit back her heartache. “I’m yours. You denied her for me and changed the law, and now it’s just you and I. We’ll figure everything out together.”
He scooped her up so fast, she gasped. In the bathroom, he hit the hot faucet and perched on the side of the tub, waiting with his eyes downcast.
“Hey,” she said, lifting his chin. “Don’t hide from me.”
He stood, undressed them both with care, and when the bath water was warm and full, he lowered her in and slid into the waves behind her. Careful of her injuries, he bathed her with such reverence, it was hard not to cry all over again. Her emotions were raw and confounding, but Riker was struggling with guilt over whatever had almost happened in Merit’s bedroom tonight, and his silent suffering was a deep and poignant pain in her chest.
As long as she lived, she would loath Merit for what she’d tried to do.
Chapter Twelve
A tremendous crash woke Hannah, shaking her from the remnants of a good dream. Tensing, she shot her hand out and found Riker’s. A deep chuckle filled the air and he tugged her fingers until they rested on his side.
Another strike of lightning lit up the room. He was propped up on an elbow, watching her.
“How long have you been awake?” she murmured.
“Since the storm started. I can’t sleep during bad weather. Instincts kick up too much.”
Turning, she mirrored his comfortable looking position. “I had a good dream.”
“Yeah? Tell me.”
Her eyes adjusted to the dark slowly and the relief at his returned confidence was almost tangible. Riker wasn’t a creature meant to be shaken. Part of that had been her fault, but the bulk of the blame lay with power hungry Merit.
“I dreamed Jenny and I went into a big city and shopped all day. Tried on all these ritzy clothes and came back to Bear Valley with fancy wardrobes. We ate giant pretzels and red slushies and laughed all day.”
Pulling her with him, he rolled onto his back and settled her into the crook of his arm. His smile shone white in the lightning strike that lit the room. “Jenny could find some trouble in a shopping mall.”
His voice was still deep and sleepy and Hannah snuggled more tightly against his side, rested her cheek against the smooth planes of his chest. Twirling a fingernail gently around one of his puckered nipples, she watched the steady rise and fall of his abdomen, flexing slightly with the exhale.
“How often do you have to Change into a bear?”
His fingertips massaged her scalp and he stroked strands of her hair. Hooking his
other arm behind his head, he watched the weather out the window. “However often I want. We aren’t ruled by the moon like other shifters. It’s easier for us. The Change isn’t really painful, so there’s no point in not giving in to our animals. It hurts if we stay in one form too long, so we have to turn at least every couple of weeks to avoid the soreness.”
“I never saw Jeremy Change.”
“He’s a clever old shifter. He wouldn’t have ever let you suspect anything. Probably slipped into the woods every week or so while you were sleeping. Did my bear scare you last night?”
The question lay thick and heavy between them. “Yes. You looked wild, like there was nothing human left of you. Your animal is huge, Riker. What chance would I have against any of you in the wrong moment?”
“You brought me back,” he whispered over the drumming rain. She lifted her chin, and his eyes shone down at her in that eerie color that matched Jeremy’s when he was getting ready to fight. “I remember the way you talked to Merit and the others. You’re no pushover. I can’t imagine much scares you. Do you want to know what happened last night?”
She traced the faint bruises on his wrist and shook her head. “I know enough. You didn’t go through with it and that’s enough for me. Merit is your past. I’m your future. I promise I won’t let what almost happened with her poison us.”
“Yesterday,” he murmured against her hair, “you said something important and didn’t give me a chance to answer your sentiments. Why?”
Why hadn’t she given him the chance to say I love you back? Because she’d been tired and angry, and terrified he didn’t feel the same and she was kindly giving him an out by not leaving a pregnant pause for him to fill with words he didn’t mean. “I don’t know.”
“You do. And you should see enough of me by now to know I feel it too.” He pulled her hand against his chest, just above the steady thrumming of his heartbeat. “You can feel it, right?”