She was burning, her breasts swelling. She instinctively moved closer, rubbing against him. “Then it’s going to be okay,” she gasped. “Maybe I didn’t do such a bad job seducing you after all. I was afraid that all that stuff would get in the way and you would—”
He was pushing her away.
“You’re lousy at seduction,” he said hoarsely. “All you would have had to do was touch me to make me go up in flames. But you kept on talking. And you were bound to stumble on the wrong thing eventually.”
She was staring at him in bewilderment. Something was going wrong. “But you said that those things I said didn’t—”
“Until you mentioned what I felt about what you’d gone through yesterday.” He said grimly, “I don’t give a damn about what happened in your past. I know you’re strong enough to overcome anything. But this was yesterday, this was on my watch, and I’m supposed to take advantage of a temporary euphoria because we managed to live through it together? I can’t do that when I know how vulnerable you are.” He took a deep breath and stepped back. “Hell, you almost had me. It can’t happen. Not now, Rachel.”
She was staring at him, stunned. Then the anger erupted. “You arrogant son of a bitch. What makes you think that you know how vulnerable I am? What makes you think I’m less strong now than I was at Sazkar Prison?” She took a step closer to him and her forefinger punched his chest. “If I wanted to have sex with you, it was because I wanted the sex and not a lecture on how fragile I am. I wanted to forget all about Huber and Nemesis for just a little while, and if that’s euphoria, then I’m guilty.” She whirled on her heel. “But don’t worry, you’d have to beg me on your hands and knees to have sex with you now. You’re stupid and egotistical, and you have no idea who I am. I promise you that you’re not going to have to worry about either my euphoria or my vulnerability.”
She left him standing there as she strode across the veranda to the door to her bedroom. She slammed the French doors behind her.
Damn. Damn. Damn.
She didn’t know if she was more angry or frustrated. For an intelligent man, Brandon was stupid, stupid, stupid. She knew how much he had wanted her, and he had completely blown it. She could still feel his hands on her breasts, the heat of—
And he had insulted her.
Yes, she was far more angry than frustrated. She strode over to the bathroom, undressing as she went. And where had those idiotic tears come from? She wiped them away, and she automatically glanced at the computer on the table. No red light. No message from Nemesis. She was almost sorry. She wanted something at which to strike out … hard.
She finished undressing, washed her face, and slipped into bed. She turned off the light and tried to relax and forget those last moments that had both angered and hurt her. Okay, admit it. Not only frustration, but hurt that Brandon had not given her the respect she deserved.
I’m not having such a good evening, Catherine. I hope you’re having a better one.
Go to sleep. Sometime tonight or tomorrow they’d hear from Nemesis or Huber and it would all begin again. She had to be ready … and not vulnerable, dammit. That word was really sticking in her—
The French doors were opening.
“May I come in?”
She could see Brandon’s tall shadow framed against the darkness. “No, you’re not invited. I thought I’d made that clear.”
“You did. But I thought you might have left an opening or two in that stinging condemnation.” He was gliding toward her. “I decided if I made amends on your terms, there was a chance of being forgiven.”
There was something different about him …
“My terms?”
“I was clumsy…” He chuckled. “And stupid. Let’s start with that. You hated that I said you were vulnerable.”
“And you’re going to make that right?”
“I’m going to try. You wouldn’t believe me if I just took it back. So I decided to show you that I’m vulnerable, too.” He took her hand and put it on his thigh. “There’s nothing more vulnerable than a naked man.”
She inhaled sharply. Naked. She could feel the tiny hairs, the muscles, the warmth. And now that he was closer, she could see the dim outline of the rest of his naked body. “Go away, Brandon.”
“I can’t do that. But I assure you that I’m not going to do anything you don’t want me to do. I’m feeling quite humble.”
“You’re never humble.”
“That was before you pointed out how stupid and arrogant I am.” He was slowly rubbing her palm up and down his thigh. “How could I help but be chastened?”
“You’d manage.” She pulled her hand away from him, but she still felt the tingle on her palm. And though he was no longer touching her, she could still feel the heat emanating from his body reaching out, touching her. “And you were arrogant.”
“But I think stupidity was the main sin. I told myself that Hu Chang’s little nightmare stories weren’t permanently affecting me, but some of the scar tissue evidently lingered. I couldn’t stand the thought of your being hurt.” He fell to his knees beside the bed. “So then I found my own way of doing it.”
“Stop talking about it. No one can hurt me but myself.”
“But I think I managed tonight.” His fingers were moving gently on the hollow of her throat with a whisper touch. “Maybe just a little bit?”
She didn’t answer. She was having trouble breathing.
“Okay, then I hurt myself more,” he said. “You said hands and knees. In case you haven’t noticed, you have me on my knees, and my hands are very much at your disposal. Will you please have sex with me, Rachel?”
His fingers had moved down to the hollow between her breasts, brushing against her nipples. She was burning, clenching. “What about my vulnerability and my euphoria?”
“Neither one exists. They were figments of my imagination.”
“Yes, they were.” She barely knew what she was saying. She was only aware of the darkness, his heat, his touch. “And there’s no … reason for me to reward you for indulging them.”
“There’s one reason.” He was lifting her nightshirt and tossing it aside. “It’s part of my penance for being an arrogant son of a bitch. You said you wanted to forget all about Huber and Nemesis for just a little while.” His lips were on her nipple, pulling, gently biting. She inhaled sharply as she felt the swelling, the tightening as he moved his cheek back and forth against her breasts. “I regard it as my duty to make that happen. I promise that you won’t think of either one of them for the rest of the night.” He moved up and over her, his hand widening her legs. “With your permission, Rachel … See how humble…” His fingers were suddenly entering, sinking deep!
She arched and cried out.
“You like that? How about this?”
His fingers were moving fast, deep, erotically stroking, while his other hand pressed down on her belly. “Tell me…”
She couldn’t tell him anything. She was gasping through gritted teeth, her heart pounding, as sensation after sensation seared through her. She couldn’t breathe at all now. Her entire body was on fire, melting. All she could do was shift desperately, lunge, try to give more, take more, while he held her maddeningly still.
“I think that might be a yes.” He lifted her leg and went still deeper.
She couldn’t hold back the cry that was almost a groan.
“Definitely a yes.” His voice was hoarse, his breathing hard. “But it’s not enough. I need permission.” His hand had left her as he moved closer. “But that permission had better come very, very soon.”
“Stop talking.” Her fingers dug into his shoulders, and she lunged upward, taking him deep inside her. She bit her lower lip to keep from screaming. “Can’t you do anything right tonight?”
“Oh, yes.” He was half laughing as he lifted her and plunged hard and deep. “Didn’t I promise you? Watch me. Hold on. I’ll do everything right…”
CHAPTER
12
<
br /> “You were very good.” Rachel tried to catch her breath as she turned over and cuddled closer to Brandon. “As I told you, I’m no expert, but I think you might be extraordinary.” She giggled. “It’s no wonder Claire was pissed off when you dropped her.”
“Has no one told you it’s bad form to talk about another woman when you’re making love to a man?”
“But we aren’t making love, we’re making sex. I promised you I wouldn’t expect anything like that from you. So it doesn’t count. Right?”
“There may be subtle differences. There were times tonight that I couldn’t determine them. We’ll have to keep on exploring.”
There were times when Rachel hadn’t been able to tell the difference, either. The passion had been too intense in the last few hours. Passion … and joy. She hadn’t expected that feeling of companionship and joy. She was still shaking, but her body was beginning to ready again. “I believe that may be a good idea. But it could be very distracting.” She laughed again. “And Catherine made me promise to relax and recharge tonight. She said nothing about future explorations.”
“And we all know how much influence Catherine has on you,” he said dryly. “Tell me you didn’t discuss having sex with me?”
“No, I wouldn’t do that. Though since she called Hu Chang to have him talk to you, she must have realized it might come up.”
He chuckled. “Oh, yes. At least as far as I was concerned it was constantly coming ‘up.’ And why wouldn’t you talk to her about me? Evidently, your other lovers weren’t off-limits.”
“They were … different. Catherine would never intrude if she could help it. But she went through a lot with me … while I was healing. It … helped me to talk to her. It still helps me.” She stopped, trying to find the words. “Not because I still need healing but because she’s always there, and I know that she always will be. I can always trust her to respect who I am but to still be there for me.”
“Then thank God for Catherine Ling,” he said thickly as he drew her closer.
“That’s what I say.” She amended, “Most of the time. I was upset about her calling Hu Chang. But it’s hard to condemn anything that’s done out of love.”
“And does she ever condemn anything you say about her relationships? Turnabout is fair play.”
“I never got the chance. Catherine is very private. She’s never said anything to me about anyone she’s slept with after her husband was killed years ago. He was also CIA and her two-year-old son was kidnapped by some scum of a Mafia dealer at the same time. It took her years to get him back. I think Luke and Hu Chang have been pretty much her whole life.”
“Along with Rachel Venable,” he murmured. “But Catherine’s a gorgeous, intelligent woman, I find it hard to believe she’s been living like a nun.”
“I didn’t say that. I said that if there’s a man, she doesn’t talk about him. And I don’t ask. What she gives me is more than enough. I know how lucky I am to have a friend like Catherine.” She rubbed her cheek against his shoulder. “You worked side by side with her on that slope. You have to know her now.”
“She was magnificent. But I like her best in the role of your friend.” He suddenly rolled back on top of her. “And I like her least when talking about her interferes with serious activity.” His lips were moving down her body to her belly. “So I believe we’ll have to delay laying any more accolades at her shrine to another time.”
His tongue …
Her stomach was clenching as her fingers moved to tangle in his hair. “And this is serious?”
“What could be more serious than keeping my promise? You were getting entirely too philosophic and contemplative.” His tongue was moving delicately, teasingly, erotically. “I think Catherine would agree, don’t you?”
Her heart was beating so hard that she could barely get the words out as she pulled him to her. “Yes … Catherine always believes in keeping promises…”
APARTMENT 2B
HOLMES APARTMENTS
SAN FRANCISCO
“You don’t know his name?” Catherine shook her head as she gazed at Cindy Naris, who was sitting at the kitchen table of her studio apartment with one leg tucked beneath her. The woman didn’t look like a hooker. She was dressed in a short black skirt and white tee shirt, two blue hair bows held her blond hair before it curled in tight ringlets over her shoulders, no lipstick, but rouge on her plump cheeks. She looked to be more thirteen or fourteen than a grown woman. But then Special Agent Herb Jackson had told Catherine that pretending to be an adolescent was Cindy’s specialty. “Don’t be afraid to tell us,” she said gently. “You can be protected. We’ll take care of you.”
“I’m not afraid.” Cindy Naris shrugged. “Herb’s a good guy. I’ve been giving him information for over a year, and he’s real careful that nobody knows that I’m a snitch.” She smiled at Jackson. “And he never asks for anything on the side. Someday, Herb. I know you think the kid thing is kind of creepy, but I can go another way. Any way.”
“The status quo works fine for me.” The young FBI agent smiled back at her. “Now tell us about this John you had tonight. Have you ever serviced him before?”
“Once. Last week. But he didn’t say nothin’ then. I picked him up on Market. He was driving a gray van, and he wanted me to do it in the back of the van. I told him I knew better than that. Too many things can happen once you turn the trick over to the customer. I wanted my own turf.” She shrugged. “He gave in and came here with me. He complained about it being a pigsty but stayed with me for most of the night. He hurt me a little, but not much.” She moistened her lips. “But this time he was real rough. He said I should be proud to do anything he asked me. He was a hero, and everyone would know it. Then he said all that crap about angels and paradise and stuff.” She looked at Jackson. “That’s the kind of thing you told me to look out for, right? Not just about drugs.”
“That’s exactly the kind of thing I need from you,” Jackson said. “It’s that kind of thing those hijackers said on 9/11. You did good, Cindy.”
“Sure.” She grinned. “But I wouldn’t know what those bastards said on 9/11. I wasn’t even born then.”
Cindy was almost as young as she looked, Catherine thought. Catherine had grown up on the streets of Hong Kong, with whores and thieves and the worst slime in the Far East, but she never became used to seeing how life could twist and hurt children. “I was older, it’s strange how everyone remembers their circumstances on that day.”
“That’s what they tell me. It’s nothing to me,” Cindy said. “But Herb says those guys are terrible people. So I Iisten real close when they start talking like that.”
“But no name?”
“Lots of guys don’t give me names. He said to call him Larry.”
“No address?”
She gave her a disgusted look. “Come on. Be for real.” She turned to Herb Jackson. “But I did take a picture of him.”
Catherine stiffened. “What?”
“After he was through with me and I went to the bathroom, I grabbed my phone and got a shot of him as I was coming back into the room.”
“He didn’t see you?” Jackson asked.
She shook her head. “Nah, he was in such a hurry to get in the bathroom himself that he almost knocked me against the doorjamb. I thought it was worth the risk. Do you want it?”
“You bet I do.”
“Is it worth more money?” She brought her phone to him. “Maybe another five hundred?”
“It wouldn’t surprise me.” He took the phone and scrolled down to the photo. He studied it and handed the phone to Catherine. “Dark hair, dark eyes, looks Middle Eastern. Not your typical blond Aryan pedigree the Red Star prefers, but they do use Middle Eastern operatives on occasion.”
“Particularly when they want to use them on suicide missions,” Catherine said grimly. “They call Al-Qaeda and Taliban their brothers, but I’ve never heard of Huber sacrificing his men to Allah. Have you ever seen this man b
efore?”
Jackson shook his head. “You?”
“No.” Catherine turned back to Cindy. “Did he mention coming back here?”
“No, he paid me, then walked out the door.” She made a face. “I should be honored? Rude bastard. I ran after him and got a shot of the van and license plate before he drove off. It’s the photo after his picture.”
“You shouldn’t have done that,” Jackson said soberly. “If he’d caught sight of you, it could have been—”
“But he didn’t,” Cindy said. “And I thought the van might help. Right?”
“Right,” Jackson said. “Maybe more than his photo.”
“See? Pretty smart, huh?”
“Extremely smart,” Catherine said. “Do you know if he spent any time with any of the other girls on Market Street?”
“You want to find out if they know anything more about him? I don’t think so. He likes the little girls, and I’m the only one who’s willing to risk it. The pay’s better, but the guys are sometimes into power trips.”
“Why?” Catherine asked quietly. “Why risk it, Cindy. We’ve agreed you’re pretty smart. You don’t have to do this. I’m sure Herb could find an organization in the city that could help you go down another path.”
“Maybe someday.” Her lips twisted. She gazed at Catherine from her head to her toes. “I’m not like you. None of us girls are like you. Hell, you look like Angelina Jolie or some other movie star. You stand on any corner, and all the Johns would zero in on you. We’d be left out in the cold. And Herb wouldn’t have brought you along if you weren’t kind of special. I’m not special. I always have to have a gimmick.” She shrugged. “But I do okay for myself.”
Vendetta Page 26