by Jaye Cox
Something small and elegant is all she wanted, and everyone made it happen. We didn’t have much money after putting a deposit on our first home, so I was glad when everyone pitched in. My parents, of course, didn’t want anything to do with the wedding; Amanda, being pregnant before we were married apparently shamed them and their beliefs. Amanda’s parents were over the moon, as was her brother, Romeo and sister, Sarah. They were my family. My sister Winnie and her girlfriend Robbie have also been amazing. I would be lost without my sister, especially growing up. I’m pulled from my thoughts when the music starts. “This is it mate,” Morris says.
“The best day of my life, to date,” I say in reply. I have had this feeling of dread in my stomach all day, it’s been gnawing and eating at me. That feeling where you just know something bad is going to happen. When the music starts and I see her and my heart skips a beat, she is breath takingly beautiful. A tear escapes and wells in my eye as I watch her walk toward me in her white maternity dress. Right then and there I know without a doubt, the feeling isn’t a case of cold feet like I’d thought earlier. The day goes by in a blur. Romeo keeps telling me now we’re officially brothers, he can call me a pussy. I tell him if marrying his sister makes me a pussy, then he can call me it all he likes.
Once the reception is over we get ready to head off to our mini honeymoon- we were only going to a small bed and breakfast just out of town. The owners said they would set the room up special for me and I’m excited to get my wife back there and take that dress off her body. Tomorrow is the start of the rest of our lives together. The house we bought is nothing special, but Amanda says we can fix it up and make it a home before the baby gets here in five weeks. If anyone can do it, she can. I never wanted to have kids of my own, I don’t know anything about being a father because mine was so terrible. Amanda wants a tribe of kids. It’s taken me awhile to get my head around becoming a father, it’s always been a thought for the future, something to keep Amanda happy because I would do anything to make her happy. When reality set in I freaked out, but over the months I’ve come to see, with Amanda by my side, I will be an amazing father.
I made sure I didn’t drink much tonight, so I was well under the limit, I had a glass of champagne for the toast, but that’s it. I wanted to be able to drive my beautiful wife to the bed and breakfast and carry her over the threshold. It might not be at our house, but I know she will like the sentiment. We say our goodbyes and everyone gives us hugs and tells us how proud they are of us. They’re all heading to watch Morris in his big fight tonight. Amanda tried to push me to go, saying she would go back and sleep and we had the rest of our lives to be husband and wife, one night won’t make a difference. To me, it makes all the difference, and Morris understands why we can’t be there. I wish him luck and tell him to kick some ass for me. “Are you ready to go, husband?” Amanda says, coming up beside me.
“I sure am my beautiful wife.” I say pulling her into my side and kissing her on the head.
Just before we get into the car, Sam comes up behind us and says, “Last photo for the newlyweds,” and after we pose with a kiss, we’re off. This really has been one of the best days of my life. Every day with Amanda has been special, but she made all my dreams come true today, the minute she said, “I Do.”
I walk into a seedy old pub not too far from where my brother Ty lives. I need a strong drink before I go see him. The condescending looks and I told you so’s can wait a few more hours. I love my brother to death, but he is a pain in my ass and always thinks he knows what’s best. I walk over to the bar and sit down. It’s good to finally not have to drive any further. Ten hours in a car is long enough for one day, I managed to get a room down the street for the night. I don’t want to push my luck and presume Ty would be okay with me staying with him. I don’t know the deal with his roommate yet either, she could be a complete bitch or something.
As I take a seat at the bar, I thank god it’s not overly busy, because I’m not in a good mood after I had to pack up and practically leave everything I own behind. The thought of admitting to my brother I fucked up again, will not be easy. The bartender walks over, what will it be sweetheart?” He asks. Sweetheart? Do I honestly look like a sweetheart you jerk off?
“A beer, whatever you have on tap is fine,” I respond as I glance around the bar. I see a guy approaching me from the corner of my eye.
“Nice tats,” he says.
“Yeah I know, now piss off, not interested.”
“Come on babe, I just want to buy you a drink.”
“I have a drink asshole.” I say, as I shrug off the hand he puts on my shoulder. “And don’t fucking touch me.” Picking up my glass, I slide off my stool.
It’s always the same thing with men, they think they can just take what they want. My brother Ty, says I have anger issues and maybe I do, but if you walked a day in my shoes, you would probably have a lot more issues than just anger issues. I throw my drink in his face. “That’s for interrupting me, when I just wanted to be left fucking alone!” I yell. Before he can get his drunken wits about himself, I punch him in the nose as hard as I can. “And that was for touching me.” The punch must have made him sober up a bit, or he wasn’t as drunk as I had thought.
“You stupid bitch!” he yells, holding his nose with one hand, I see his other hand balled into a fist. I know what happens next, I’m not afraid to be hit; that’s if he can get a punch in before I knee him in the nuts. Out of nowhere another guy grabs the asshat by his shirt and pulls him in close.
“You think you’re a tough guy, about to hit a woman?”
“She fucking hit me first.” The drunk complains.
“Don’t be such a fucking pussy,” he says and head butts the guy, knocking him out cold. I notice two big blokes in black security shirts coming our way.
“Fuck, I don’t need to get arrested again.” I say.
“Come with me,” he says holding out his hand. Under normal circumstances I would tell him to go fuck himself, as I don’t like to be touched or actually touch anyone. But my choices are; get arrested, or take my chances with this dude, it’s really not a hard choice. I take his hand and he leads me out the back door. Over to his Ninja 1000cc, it’s sexy. I do have a weakness for a man on a motorbike.
We stand there a moment in awkward silence, then we look down at our still clasped hands. I let go. I’m confused, I have let him touch me voluntarily and it didn’t feel awful. “Thanks for saving my ass back there,” I say, as I turn and walk away to my hotel a few minutes away. I know I should call my brother and tell him I’m back, but I’m still confused and everything I think of sounds stupid. I can hear the lecture now. “Grow up Ruby. You can’t keep running from all your problems, blah blah blah……” I know he is right, I should just tell him I wanted to live closer to him…. Now that’s a good idea, why didn’t I think of that in the first place? I hear a motorbike slowing down beside me, it’s the guy from the pub. “I’ll warn you now, I have a mean right hook and I’m not afraid to kick your ass and steal your bike.” I say, turning to look at him.
“All that aggression... I can think of far better ways to take it all out on me. He taunts. “Get on.”
I hesitate for a minute. Could I really do this? He is the first guy in a long time that could touch me without me wanting to rip his throat out. As he starts to take off, I grab on quickly so I don’t fall off. What is he playing at, trying to scare me? Driving like a crazy person? Jokes on him, it would take a lot more than going fast on a bike to scare me. What he doesn’t know is, I ride too. Every corner he takes is calculated, he knows exactly what he is doing, but is trying to make it seem like he doesn’t. We pull up in front of a house and he kills the engine. I take off my helmet and pass it to him hard enough to jolt him backwards.
“Are you fucking kidding me? If you didn’t want me to come with you, then you shouldn’t have bought me here. Don’t try some lame attempt to scare me. It didn’t work by the way, next time you might want to pick
up a different type of girl for that to work.” He looks at me and smiles. I see his chest vibrate, like he just had an inside laugh at my expense. I go to slap him but he’s fast, and he intercepts my hand. Pulling me flush against his body, his lips are on mine and it’s a heated rush of lips and tongues. He guides me backwards with his body until my back hits the door, grabs a handful of ass and lifts me. I wrap my legs around his body while he unlocks the door with his other hand. If the man can multi task like this now, I can’t wait to see what he can do when all his concentration and hands are on me.
The house is pitch black as he walks inside. He doesn’t turn on any lights, but hesitates a moment to allow his eyes to adjust to the darkness. All the while I’m still clinging at his waist and he is holding my face, kissing my neck and kneading my ass with other hand. The walk down a hallway is brief, he opens a door I presume is his bedroom, and sets me down on my feet. “Turn around and put your hands against the wall, it’s just in front of you.” I do as he says, not to submit to him, but because I’m so turned on. For the first time in my life, I want and need to be touched.
I can feel him behind me, he leans in and kisses and nibbles on my neck. This makes me close my eyes, and arch my head back. I feel his hands slide up my waist and over my lace up corset top. Some might think it’s too provocative to wear it in public, but I don’t give a rat’s ass what anyone else thinks. With one hand on one side and a flick of his wrist, he has my top free and it falls to the floor. I’m topless in a pitch black room with a stranger. His lips press to the back of my neck. I take charge and turn around. My eyes have adjusted enough I can make out shapes. I pull his shirt up over his head and unbutton my pants. I kick off my shoes as he drops to his knees and helps pull my pants off. He hooks his thumbs in my pants and as he slides them down, he runs his tongue down my stomach and then my leg. It’s like for a split second he is lost in the moment and just as quick the moment passes. He lifts me again and my back hits the wall. I hear him unclick his belt and his pants fall to the ground. Without any warning he is inside me, big and hard. There is nothing passionate about this, it’s rough and gritty. As he thrusts up inside me, I slam down onto him. His hand grabs me hard around my waist, hard enough it will cause a bruise, hard enough to excite me more. I throw my head back and it makes a thump against the wall, and in a split second everything changes
“Theodore, is that you? Are you home?” A woman says. His whole body goes stiff when he hears her voice. He takes a step back and lets me go and I fall to the floor. I pick myself up. Of course, he has a girlfriend, that is just my fucking luck.
Then there is a knock at the door. “Yeah, I will be right out.” He says, as he flicks on the light and does a double take when he notices all of my tattoos and piercings. He wouldn’t have seen many of them in the dark, or under my pants and jacket. The way he looks at me is like he is dissecting, trying to understand the meaning behind all of them; the same way I can see the pain and sadness behind all of his. We are both standing naked, just staring at each other, until there is another knock on the door. “I’m coming, shit.” He says pulling up his pants he looks at me. “Fuck, I should never have brought you here,” he mutters, leaving the room.
Does he expect me to just stay here and wait while he goes out and talks to his girlfriend? And then what? I do a walk of shame? No way. I get dressed and grab my hand bag. Luckily it’s only a one story house, I open the window and jump out. I have no idea where I am, but once I find a street sign I can call a cab and forget this even happened. I haul ass out of there so fast. How could I have been so stupid to let my guard down? I don’t let men touch me, let alone fuck me and for what, to just get thrown away like yesterday’s trash? Men, they are all the same. Just take what they want and throw it away without even a second thought. I built walls around me to protect myself, and this is a lesson well learned. I find the nearest street and get a cab back to the motel. I text my best friend and let her know I got here safe, had an eventful night, and will call her tomorrow. I’m not ready to give her a play by play tonight. I still have not called my brother yet, but I think surprising him tomorrow after my interview will be better. The news will go down better if I have a job. I get ready for bed, tomorrow is a new day and it has to be better than the drama of today.
Somewhere during the night I have become tangled in the covers as I wake up feeling trapped. It’s just before ten and get myself something to eat to calm my nerves; I hate interviews, I hate being judged on my appearance. Even though my best friend, who set this up for me, says it’s fine and the guys at the shop are cool. Big Moe’s House of Ink is a very popular tattoo shop in town. People come from all over the world to be tattooed there, the artists are high profile and they get booked out for months. Big Moe is even booked out a few years, which is insane. Jobs in places like this don’t come easy. I only do body piercing, but I would love to tattoo one day. I have just never stayed in one place long enough to get the chance.
When it’s time to leave, I give myself a little pep talk - I’m kickass - I don’t need to get nervous - I am awesome at what I do - why wouldn’t they want to hire me? I walk into the shop and it has to be the best tattoo shop I have ever been to. I have heard about it before, but to see it in person is awesome. The front area is huge, the walls are covered in graffiti and all sorts of art. It’s amazing, I’m in awe. There are stations on each side of the room, set up with people tattooing. None of them look up, they just keep doing their thing. A guy covered in tattoos finally comes over.
“Welcome to Big Moe’s House of Ink, can I help you?”
“Yes, I’m here to see Big Moe.” I smile politely.
“You’re Ruby? Your friend Taylor has put in a good word for you.”
“She did?” I thought she only called and organised me an interview, not talked me up. That makes me a little nervous. I know I’m good at what I do, but now the pressure is on to make sure I can live up to the expectations Taylor has set for me.
“Yep, I’m Jash, and I’m your test dummy. Moe is down here, follow me.” I follow Jash to a room in the back. Moe is a big guy, with an even bigger grey beard.
“You must be Ruby, nice to meet you.”
“You too.” I say.
“Taylor has vouched for you, so today you will pierce this pussy’s nipple, and see how you handle everything.” Moe prompts.
Impressed so far with my interview I confidently say, “Sweet! Let’s get started then Jash, can you take off your shirt for me.”
“Boss you sure I have to do this?” Jash hesitates.
“Jash sit your punk ass down, how else am I gunna know what the girl can do?” Moe says.
I easily get my tools set up as the room layout is pretty much the same as everywhere else I have worked. Using a Chlorhexidine skin wash, I clean off his nipple and mark it. Noticing Jash is a little off colour, I question, “You okay, Jash? He nods and squeezes his eyes shut. “Alright, on the count of three. One, two,” I say, and push the needle through – job done.
“Shit, fuck you never said three!” He whimpers.
Moe throws his head back and belts out a loud laugh. Then gives me a wink for using a diversionary tactic on him. I put in the pre chosen jewellery and finish up with a thorough cleaning of Jash’s chest. “So, how did I do?” I ask.
“You were already hired before you walked in, that was just for my enjoyment.” Moe says, pointing to Jash.
“I hate you.” Jash says, walking from the room.
“Let me show you around and you can meet some of the guys.” Moe indicates I go ahead through the open doorway. He takes me around to the stations and introduces me to a few of the guys. Then asks me to stick around today and takes some notes on how they all like their stations. He tells me I will have to help out if I’m not busy, and that’s fine. He also says they have a few other tattooists and to introduce myself to them when they come in. Everyone here is by appointment only, only the apprentices do walk-ins. As I don’t have to do much
today but just observe, he fills me in on my appointments register and shows me my bookings for next week. I see they have quite a few bookings already for me for next week. I’m super excited I have landed a job so soon, and feel so relieved I can see Ty tonight with clear conscious. And I won’t need to sponge off him or receive a lecture on responsibility, or my irresponsibility.
I pull up out the front of a house and get out of my car. I dig around and pull a small piece of paper out of my back pocket, I’m sure I must have read the address wrong. Surely this cannot be where my brother lives! Just looking at the house makes me want to vomit, it’s a small little house, with a white picket fence, that has seen better days – it even has a fucking child’s tire swing. As I walk towards the house, I expect to see a minivan pull up and Fido run out and greet me, followed by the usual 2.5 kids, blah a fairy tale gone fucking wrong if you ask me. I push the doorbell and wait. “Hello,” says a petite girl opening the door, she looks me up and down with a distrustful look; a look so familiar to me as it’s just like the one everyone gives me. But today, it pisses me off, “Is Ty here?” I say, with a little more attitude than intended.
“Somewhere, I can go find him for you,” she says sweetly.
“Can you make it quick?”
“Ruby, don’t be a bitch.” Ty says, walking up behind me.
“I’m not being a bitch, I just wanted to see where my brother lives now.” I explain, as I give Ty a squeeze in greeting.
“Brother?” The tiny chick exclaims.
I can’t believe she is still here - “Who are you anyway?”
“Ruby, this is my housemate Bells. Bells, this is my sister Ruby, who is not normally such a bitch.” Ty explains.