by Casey Peeler
“Hey, Tyke. About time you called your mama! How’s it going?” she says with spunk.
“Um, good actually.” Mom pauses and I prepare myself.
“Who is she?” She knows before I even say a word.
“Her name is Rilla.”
“That’s an interesting name. So tell me, why her?” she asks because she knows the path I’ve chosen since the accident.
“Mom, she’s different. She doesn’t care who I am. In fact, she pretty much hated me until yesterday.”
“What happened yesterday?”
“I kinda punched a guy for her and got her out of a sticky situation.”
Mom is silent for a moment. “So let me get this straight. This girl didn’t fall at your feet the way all those other girls do, you overstepped your boundaries to help her, and now you decided to break your football-only rule?”
“Pretty much. I don’t know how to describe it, but she kinda centers me. We run together every morning and it just starts my day off right. I think I’m okay breaking my rule for her, Mom.”
“Son, I’ve only got one little bit of advice for ya. Well, maybe two things. Wrap it before you tap it, and don’t hurt her. You know you need to focus on playing hard and making the draft. Make sure she’s ready for the life you might be heading toward.” She goes on to ask me about my week and I fill her in. We talk about family weekend coming up in a few weeks and I have to say, I can’t wait to see her. She’s going to love Rilla.
Chapter 12
Tyke
A little after five, I get a text from a number I don’t recognize, but there’s no doubt it’s her. Quickly, I save her name in my contacts.
Rilla: I’m back. You better be glad I’m alive after that visit.
I gulp, then reply.
Me: Are you serious?
Rilla: Gotcha! Nah, he gave me crap, but it’s just our usual. Wanna come over?
Me: Sure. I’ll be out there in 10.
Arriving outside her dorm, I wait for her to let me in. She opens the door and I follow her up. Every girl in the hall is staring. I smile at them, and then she turns around, smiles at me and the next thing I know, her arms are around my neck and her lips are on mine. With one quick kiss at the end, she turns around and hollers down the hall. “Hey y’all! He’s mine so back off.”
I guess we’re official. I scan the room as I walk in and I’m shocked that Laney isn’t there. “Oh, she’s over at Jacob’s. He lives in those apartments on the back side of campus. I bet I don’t see her tonight,” Rilla explains.
“Oh,” I say. “So, I’m yours, huh?”
“Yep, you got a problem with that?”
“Nope, I liked you taking charge out there,” I say with a half-smile.
“Did ya?” she asks as she walks to me and wraps her arms around me again.
I kiss her lips quickly. “I did. So how about we make this official?” She looks at me funny. “Rilla James, wanna put a label on it?”
“I guess,” she says with a smile then bursts out laughing. This girl is one of a kind, and if the past twenty four hours are any indication of our future, it’s gonna be a wild ride. I look into those lion eyes and bring her lips to mine.
Rilla
I’m freaking Tyke Jamison’s girl. I pause for a moment and realize I might have lost my mind. Then I look into those eyes of his and know that there’s more. I know that he’s worth a shot, and that I’m the only one on this campus that doesn’t care that he’s the best. Yeah that’s important, it’s who he is, but he’s more than that. He has a story, and I want to know every page of the book.
Around nine, Tyke tells me goodnight, and goes back to his dorm. I know I’ll see him in the morning, just like I have since the first time he invaded my space, but now I kind of like it.
Grabbing my shower caddy, I go and get ready for bed. Before I realize it, I’ve spent way too long in the shower thinking of Tyke and his lips on mine. I also keep thinking about those eyes, and that look of hurt when I accused him of drinking. If I’m really going to be his girlfriend, I want to know it all: his past, his right now, and his future.
After sliding on my robe, I grab my things and head back to my room. I’m shocked to see Laney studying on her bed when I walk in. She looks up.
“Dang, I was about to call 911. Wait. What’s got you grinning all goofy?” she asks.
“Tyke,” I say with a smile.
“What about TD?” she questions.
“He kinda asked me to be his girlfriend.”
“Oh dear Lord! She stands up and puts her hand on my forehead. “Are you okay? Did you make a deal with the devil? Isn’t that what you pretty much called him the other day?” she questions.
“Yeah, but I think I was wrong. I think you were right, Laney, he’s not what the media or I made him out to be,” I say.
“Ha! See, I was right. I knew you liked him and just needed to give him a shot. Now, let’s get to the good stuff. Tell me how it all happened, and how good of a kisser he is,” she says with wagging eyebrows.
I fill her in on everything, and before we know it, it’s almost midnight. Tomorrow’s eight o’clock class is going to come early, but it’s easier to wake up knowing I get to run with my boyfriend beforehand. Man, that sounds crazy.
Crawling up my ladder, I pull my covers back, set my alarm, and drift off to sleep.
Somewhere between my sweet dreams and the first peek of sunshine, I hear the sound of Luke Bryan over and over. My phone. Grabbing it, I glance down. Daddy.
“Daddy?” I say groggily.
“Rilla. I just got a call. Get dressed. I’m coming to get you.”
“What’s going on?” I ask as panic sets in.
“It’s your mom.” In that moment, everything stands still. “Daddy, what about her? We haven’t seen her since I was six. Why are you calling me about her now? She’s no reason to wake me out of a dead sleep.”
“Rilla, this isn’t a conversation for the phone. Get ready, and I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
“Yes sir,” I say as I quietly climb out of bed and try not to wake Laney.
As my foot hits the floor, I land on top of something sharp, and I yelp.
“You okay, RJ?” she asks, rubbing her eyes.
“I’m not sure. Daddy called and he’s coming to get me. It’s something to do with my mom,” I say with a hint of bitterness in my voice.
“Oh, I didn’t think she was around.”
“She’s not. I’ll keep you posted. Go on back to bed.” She falls back on her bed and is snoring before I can slide on my clothes. I think about texting Tyke, but figure I better wait until after I know what’s going on. It’s not like he knows much about her anyway.
Hurrying outside, I see Daddy’s truck pulling up to the curb. I open the door and climb inside. He is eerily quiet.
“What’s going on?” I demand. He stops the truck at the stoplight, looks at me, and he’s crying. Oh God. He doesn’t cry. “Daddy, you’re scaring me.”
I hear him gulp, and his words are barely audible. “She’s dead.” I know I didn’t hear that correctly. I know she’s a bitch for leaving, but I didn’t want her to die. She’s my mom.
“What do you mean?” I question.
“She was killed by a drunk driver tonight. She was heading this way to see her sister. Your Aunt Dee called to tell me. I’m sorry. I didn’t want it to come out like this, but I’m not sure what to even say.”
I look at him and then turn my eyes back to the road. What does this even mean? Are we supposed to go and act like we care? Why is he so upset? She left us. Oh gosh, I’m a shitty person for even thinking that way. I guess he did love her once. I don’t know what to say, so I remain quiet.
As we turn onto the highway, I know we are going to my Aunt Dee’s. She lives about an hour from here, and I never see her. I got my middle name from her, but that’s about all I know about her. She does send a birthday card each year, and that’s more than I can say about my mom. I haven’t seen my mom
in over ten years.
Chapter 13
Tyke
When my alarm goes off, I get ready for my daily run with Rilla, but when I arrive at Stadium Drive she’s not there. I figure she’s probably running late and I pull out my phone to see if she called while I was getting ready. There’s a text from her.
Rilla: Not gonna make it this morning. Call me when you get up and I’ll let you know what’s going on.
I don’t wait a second. Something must be wrong. Hitting the call button, it feels like an eternity before she answers.
“Hello,” she says quietly.
“Hey, you okay?” I question.
“Hold on, let me walk outside.” Huh? I start to walk toward her dorm. “I’m at my aunt’s house about an hour away. My mom was killed in an accident last night. We got here about twenty minutes ago, and I don’t know much.”
As she talks, I feel sick to my stomach. The way her voice is trying to stay steady tells me that even though she doesn’t seem to care about her mom at all, it’s affecting her. “I’m coming,” I tell her.
“No, it’s okay. You’ve got practice and class. I’m not sure how long we will be here. I’m confused as to why I’m here to begin with. All I know is that once they get arrangements settled, I’ll be back this afternoon.”
She’s brushing this off like it’s no big deal. But I know it’s a really big deal. If something happened to my dad right now, I’d be a wreck even though he’s a total dick.
“I can get John to bring me,” I offer.
“No. I’m okay. I’ll call you when I know more details.”
As much as I want to be there for her, I have to respect her wishes. We just started this relationship, and I’m not going to push my way in where she doesn’t want me. When she gets back, I will be here for her because at some point she’s going to crack. Believe me, I know.
Instead of running, I decide to head to the weight room, but the more that I try to forget what’s happened to Rilla, the more nauseous I become. By the time I get to the weight room doors, I throw them open and sprint to the nearest trash can. Coach is standing in front of me when I lift my head.
“Everything okay or do you need to go to the infirmary?”
“I’ll be fine.” He pauses and looks my way.
“Follow me,” he says as he leads me to his office. I wipe my sweaty palms on my gym shorts as he motions for me to take a seat. He reaches into a small fridge under his desk and hands me a twenty-ounce Coke.
“Those always make me feel better when I don’t feel my best.”
“Thanks.”
He pauses and looks at me. “So tell me. Do I need to worry if you’ve been drinking? You don’t look like the normal TD today.”
“No, no sir, not a all. I kinda got some news this morning.” Coach gives me a worried look as I continue. “It’s just this girl.” He lets out a long sigh. “It’s not like that. I’m not about to be a dad or anything. My mama taught me better than that.”
“So what is it?”
“Her name is Rilla.” Coach lifts his hand.
“As in RJ?” I nod. “Go on.”
“Her mom was killed last night in an accident.” His face pales. “Mackenzie James was killed?”
“I guess, if that’s her name.”
“It is. So, I’m guessing that brought up some bad memories for you?”
“Yes, sir. Every time I think I’m moving past it, something else happens. It’s like every time things start to go well something happens to throw it back in my face. Not that this is the same situation, but it just makes all the memories come back up to the surface.”
Coach sits there a moment. “Do you know why I gave you a shot?”
“You wanted a great player on your team?” I say knowing that’s not the correct answer, but I’m clueless.
“No, because I’ve been where you are.” I sit there stunned.
“What do you mean?”
“When I was sixteen, I killed a young family in a car accident. I was driving, and no I wasn’t drunk or anything. We were young and dumb and it cost innocent people their lives. I went from being a normal guy in town to the outcast that didn’t fit in anywhere. I know what it’s like. I felt all of the blame, but eventually, you work through it. You never forget, but you live your life because they can’t and you vow to be the best person you can be going forward.” I can’t speak. I had no idea and I don’t know what to say. “It’s not something that I share with people, but I felt that you might need someone to talk to every now and then. Someone that gets it.”
“So how did you get past it? I mean, between all the therapy the court and my mom made me do, I’m tired of talking about it. The talking doesn’t take away the pain and the memories of seeing their lifeless bodies. It’s like I can still see them when I’m walking across campus. I even thought Rilla was Janie the first time I saw her. I thought I was losing it.”
“I’m just asking, so don’t take it the wrong way. You’re not using RJ as a replacement are you?”
“Absolutely not. As a matter of fact, I had a rule that I was only going to focus on football with no female distractions but when I’m with her I feel like she gets me. Janie and Baker are always in my head, but it’s different now. I know I have to move on from the past and start living my dream for them.
“I’ve known RJ since she was born. She’s a spitfire, calls it like she sees it, but she’s got heart. When she goes all in, she’s unstoppable. She’s like her dad. Hope you know what you’re getting yourself into, son.”
“Yeah, I’m still trying to get over the fact that Kenton James is her dad. But I like that she doesn’t care who I am and tells me like it is. It’s refreshing.”
“Yeah, well he’s my best friend so we’ll both be on your ass if you hurt that girl. Ya know, he’s the one that got me through everything,” Coach says, glancing at the wall. I notice a black-and-white photo of two little boys wearing football helmets and holding fishing rods in their hands. Wow, what a small world. “Actually he and Mackenzie both did. Man, he loved that girl. Never thought they’d ever split. They were inseparable back then.”
Coach clears his throat and starts talking to me about the games coming up. By the time I walk out of his office, I have a newfound respect for him. I also know that if I need someone, he’s here.
When I leave his office, that asshat Josh from the basketball team bumps into me and starts running his mouth about the party and how he almost sealed the deal with Rilla. I want to punch him again but he’s not worth my time. I’ve got more important things to deal with right now.
Rilla
Walking back into Aunt Dee’s home, I feel like a complete stranger. She and Daddy are sitting at the kitchen table. She’s holding a cup of coffee, and Daddy is just sitting there. When they hear the door close, Daddy motions for me to take a seat beside him.
“Rilla, there are some things you need to know,” Aunt Dee says as she reaches across the table to take my hands in hers. “Your mom loved you. She didn’t show it, but she did.” I want to roll my eyes, but Daddy clears his throat as if reading my mind. “She also told me that if something ever happened to her that I was to give you this.” She takes an envelope and slides it across the table. I don’t want to touch it. I want to burn it without looking.
“Rilla, it’s okay,” Daddy says.
I take the envelope and open it cautiously. I keep waiting for someone to jump out and tell me this is a joke. Tearing the paper open, I slide out the contents and open the tri-folded paper. Her will. I glance at it and begin to read. I see that she has left me everything, but in doing so, I’m also in charge of her burial. Well, thanks Mom. I don’t know shit about you and have to plan a funeral. I look at Daddy, but he remains quiet.
“What am I supposed to do with this?”
Aunt Dee responds, “You need to take some time and let that soak in. She has everything ready for the funeral and it has been financially taken care of. It’s just a matter
of meeting with them and going through the motions.”
Something about this doesn’t feel right. Why is she so calm?
“Just curious. Why are you so calm about this? I’d think if my sister died I’d show some type of emotion.” Daddy cuts his eyes toward me.
“I understand, but you see, I knew this was coming. I just didn’t think it would be this soon.”
“Does anyone care to fill in the blanks? Cause it’s obvious both of you know more than me.”
Aunt Dee starts to speak, but Daddy raises his hand. Thank goodness.
“Rilla, your mom was sick. She had a rare form of cancer. She knew her days were limited. In a way, the accident might have been a blessing.”
“Did you know about this?” I ask Daddy.
“No, well not until about a year ago. She mailed me a letter and told me everything. I knew one day we’d all be sitting here having this conversation. However, this accident was just an accident. It wasn’t her fault.”
“How do you know? For all we know she could have ran into that car on purpose.”
Daddy pauses and for some reason something in my gut tightens.
“Rilla, it was a drunk driver that hit her. He walked away without a scratch.” Something within me snaps.
“Well, ain’t that some shit,” I say, standing up and storming out of the house. Walking into the front yard, I scream into the morning air, and demand to know why this is happening. Then Tyke’s image pops into my mind, and I want out of here. I want to escape it all.
As arms strong enough to hold up the world wrap around me, I fall to pieces. I can’t explain the emotions running through my body, but I know that even though she left, it was never as permanent as this. All hope of her returning is abolished and the small piece of my heart I kept hidden away for her shatters into a million pieces.
Daddy holds me until I am able to stand on my own. That’s when I tell him I’m ready to go. I’ve got school and a life to get back to. He looks at me like I’m crazy. He knows me better than that. This is my way to escape what’s in front of me.
Daddy goes back inside the house, and I go to the truck. I’m so done here. As he walks out, I see that Aunt Dee walks out with him. He embraces her in a hug and she walks to me.