“I… I’m sorry you had to go to all of this expense just because of my crazy father.”
“That’s nothing for you to worry about. I’ve finally figured out what was right in front of me the entire time. Tyler, Brandon, I need to ask you both a question,” he said. By the way he looked away, paused, and seemed to have to work up his nerve before speaking, Brandon knew that the question was going to be a tough one. “Are you gay?”
It wasn’t clear which of the two guys was more shocked by the question. They both were basically speechless.
Brandon recovered first and answered, raising his head to look directly at the man who had asked him the question. “Yes, sir. I am.” He paused for a minute, then said, “I can go, sir,” and started to stand.
“Sit down, Brandon. You’re not going anywhere. I don’t care whether you’re gay or straight or bisexual or anything else. I’ll be honest with you. I don’t understand the gay thing, but that doesn’t mean that it’s a bad thing, despite what some people say. I don’t know much at all about it, so maybe you can help me learn, maybe you can talk with me about what it’s like to grow up to be gay. Would that be possible?”
“Of course, sir. I’d be happy to. I guess it’s quite different than growing up straight. I’d be glad to tell you about how I think it’s different.”
“Good. I’m glad to hear that. Thank you, Brandon.”
Tyler had sat quietly across the table. His father looked at him and said, “Tyler, you’ve been really quiet. Is there anything you want to say?”
“Um….” He hesitated.
“Tyler, it doesn’t matter to me whether you’re gay or straight,” his mother said, joining the conversation his father had led up until that point. “What matters to us is that you be who you are inside, that you be happy, and that you have a good life. So relax, please. There is no one right answer. It’s okay, son. You can say it. We won’t hate you. Nothing will change. You’ll always be our son, and we’ll always love you. Remember that above all else. You will always be our son and we will always love you.”
There were tears in Tyler’s eyes as he glanced at Brandon who nodded encouragingly.
“Yes.”
“Yes?” his father asked, confused.
“Yes. I’m gay.”
His father nodded and said, “Thank you both for telling us. I hope that you can come to believe me when I say that you should be able to come talk to us about anything, including this. If it’s important to you, I want to hear about it, I want to lend a helping hand when I can. I can’t always do anything, but just maybe I can. So please, I don’t care what, but please try to talk with us. We just might surprise you and understand more than you think.”
They were all quiet for a minute before Tyler’s father said one more thing. “Brandon, I started this conversation when you asked me what your father had said when he called. I haven’t forgotten that you asked me that. Everything we’ve been talking about is part of my conversation with him.
“Like I said, I had no idea who he was when he called. He identified himself, but I don’t think I’ve ever met the man or spoken with him before in my life.
“I didn’t need to worry because he never gave me much of a chance to say anything. He did all of the talking. Are you sure you want to hear this, Brandon?”
“Yes, sir. I have a good idea what he said. I’ve known the guy my whole life, and I’ve seen how he works. I’d like to hear it, please.”
“He had some pretty negative things to say about you. I could not believe some of the things he said. I have never in my life heard a father say things like that about his own son. He told me you were gay, and yes, I cleaned up the language. He told me that he blamed Tyler for introducing you to ‘that lifestyle.’ He blamed me for ruining your shot at being an Olympic athlete.”
“You haven’t said anything about what he blames himself for,” Brandon said with a smile.
“There wasn’t anything,” Tyler’s dad said.
“I’m shocked,” Brandon joked.
“He asked me if I knew what kind of a person you were and told me I should warn all the people in town that you were an ‘admitted sexual deviant’—his words—and that I should be on my guard. He told me he’d had a call from the police here in town about his son living under a bridge. They’d asked him to come get you, but he refused.”
Brandon felt the words hit him as hard as a fist that had just slammed into his midsection, knocking the air from his lungs and leaving him reeling and in pain. He was surprised by how he felt hurt. It had felt so good walking away from his father once he’d realized how his dad had used him, but hearing the things he’d said made Brandon angry and confused.
“Brandon, I know that his words hurt. They must. And I’m so sorry about that. But remember one thing—I don’t know him. I do know you. And I trust you, and we want you here with us until you head off to college. You might not have a home there, but you do with us. Everyone needs a home and depriving someone of that is, in my mind, one of the most horrible crimes anyone can commit against another person. I don’t want you sleeping under that bridge or any other bridge. Are we in agreement about that?”
“Yes, sir. A mattress will probably be a lot more comfortable than a concrete slab.”
“Well, why don’t you go up to your room and check it out. You look exhausted. We’ll see you in time for breakfast and we’ll drive you to work. Okay?”
“More than okay, sir. Thank you. Really. I’m more grateful than you could know.”
Both he and Tyler stood to head upstairs.
“Oh, boys, one final thing. I’m sorry about this, but I’d prefer that you two not sleep together while here. I know you probably have and most likely will again. I’m working on it, but I’m honestly not quite that far along yet. So for now, please, no sex in the house. Okay?”
“Yes, sir,” Brandon agreed.
“Sure,” Tyler said. “Can we make out? Kiss? Stuff like that?”
“Let me think about that one. For the moment, though, if you’re both in the same bedroom for any reason, please keep the door open. We’ll talk more about this tomorrow after I’ve had some time to think about it.”
Chapter 18—Visitors
BRANDON WAS shocked one evening about a week later to return from work at the farm stand to find Joel sitting on the front porch of Tyler’s house. Neither of the guys had seen him or talked with him in a long time so both were quite happy.
“Joel!” Brandon yelled as he ran toward him. He grabbed Joel and lifted him off the ground, excitement ruling the moment.
“Don’t hurt yourself there, big guy,” Joel said with a smile. When Brandon put him back down on the ground, Joel quickly lifted Brandon’s shirt to verify something. “Why have you lost so much weight? What the fuck, dude?”
“It’s going back on,” Brandon said softly.
“It’s true,” Tyler said. “You should have seen him a couple of weeks ago. He looked like a death camp survivor. It was gruesome.”
“Okay,” Joel said with a scowl. “What the fuck is that all about? You anorexic, Bran?”
“No, not at all,” he said. “I have a very healthy appetite. But I had… how to describe it… a bit of a rough patch a few weeks ago.”
“A rough patch,” Joel parroted back at Brandon. “Okay. I’m afraid you’re going to have to explain that to me. What do you mean by a ‘rough patch’?”
“It’s a long story,” Brandon said, “and let’s just say that it’s over and I’d rather not talk about it quite yet.”
Joel looked at Tyler, but Tyler was deferring to Brandon.
“All right,” Joel said, “but just know that I have a very long memory. I will bring this up again at some future date, and I will expect to get an answer from you then. So be prepared, guys. Got it?”
“Yes,” Tyler said. “You’ll get an answer when Brandon is comfortable and ready.”
“I damned well better,” he said.
“What b
rings you over this way?” Brandon asked.
“Just wanted to come check up on you and say hi. Since we were gone for so many weeks, I wanted to see how you were doing over here.” He paused for a moment. “And I bring news from home. Some surprising news.”
“Oh?” Brandon asked. “This I’ve got to hear. What’s happening back there that I could possibly care about?”
Joel took a deep breath before continuing. He looked at Brandon and said, “Your brother came home.”
“What?” Brandon practically shouted. “What? When? Where? What’s he been doing? How is he? Is he okay? Is he happy? What’s he doing?”
“Slow down there,” Joel said. “That’s a lot of questions. One at a time, please. Yes, he came back.”
“Is he living back at home?” Brandon asked.
“Are you kidding me?” Joel said. “Hell no. I said he came back, but he’s no less angry with your dad than he was when he left. He came home to have it out with the man and from everything I hear, they had one hell of an argument.”
“Who won?” Tyler asked.
“It wasn’t Brandon’s dad,” Joel said.
“Damn,” Brandon said. “I’d have paid good money to watch that one play out. Hell, I’d pay a lot just to see Jeremy again for a few minutes, you know, make sure he’s okay. What’s he been doing since he left? Do you know? Have you seen him? Talked with him?”
“I’ve seen him and spoken with him. He’s older than me and we didn’t really know one another when he was still at home, but it turns out he and my sister went to school together, and she’s also quite fond of Brandon, so she and he talked and she told him that he needed to talk to me. He was really anxious to find out if you were okay.”
“He was?” Brandon said, surprised.
“Yes, he is,” Joel corrected Brandon. “Are you willing to see him? He really wants to see you.”
“Of course, yes!” Brandon practically shouted. “Yes, why wouldn’t I want to see him? I’ve got so many questions for him. There’s so much he wouldn’t ever talk about, and I hope he has answers for me. And I… I just… want to know that he’s okay.”
“I’m doing okay.”
Brandon whipped around fast when he heard a voice that was familiar in a way, but at the same time not quite. His gaze settled on someone he’d practically given up ever seeing again—before him stood none other than his older brother, Jeremy.
“Jeremy!” Brandon shouted as he threw himself at the man, wrapping him in a hug that had enough strength to knock most normal people off their feet. Brandon was so excited he could barely string words together at first. When he finally could, he said, “Is it really you? Is it really you?”
“Yep, it’s really me, bro. Live and in the flesh.”
Brandon held him tightly for nearly two minutes before he could loosen his hold enough for the two of them to take a half step back and look at one another. It was definitely his brother. He was older, he was bigger, and his skin looked tanned and maybe a touch weathered.
“Where have you been?” Brandon asked.
“I’ve been all over, but for the last year, I’ve lived in southern Louisiana, working on an offshore oil rig. It’s miserable work, but the pay’s good.”
Brandon touched his brother’s arms, acknowledging the new muscles he’d added since they’d last seen each other. “You’ve filled out, put on some major muscles.”
“It happens when you haul around some of the shit we have to move on the rig.”
“I… I can’t believe it’s really you. Do you know how many times over the years I’ve wanted to know what happened? It’s too high a number to count.”
“Sorry I left you to carry the load of the old man all by yourself. I didn’t think it would be so bad for you. Whoever would have expected him to sell his business? I know I never considered that a possibility. He’s always been too much of a workaholic for me to even think about him not having something to do with himself.
“When I heard what he’d done, how he’d cashed in and ‘retired,’ my first thought was ‘Fuck.’”
“Why?” Brandon asked.
“Because I knew that he would latch on to the closest thing at hand in any way, shape, or form, and try to turn that into a full-time occupation. It didn’t matter what it was. I immediately knew it meant trouble. I’m just sorry that it took so long for word of his craziness to reach me. I understand it got pretty bad.”
Brandon looked down, suddenly unable to meet his brother’s gaze.
“Yes,” Joel and Tyler said when Brandon did not speak.
“It got pretty unbearable,” Tyler said. “I don’t know how he stuck it out as long as he did.”
“Hi, you must be Tyler?” Jeremy asked with a smile.
“Yep, that’s me.” Tyler smiled and offered his hand.
“Joel told me a lot about you.”
“You can’t trust everything he says,” Tyler joked. “Unless it was good stuff. Then he’s the best source you could ask for.”
“It was all good, man. Thanks for being there for my brother when I wasn’t. Thanks… just for being his friend.”
“He’s more than just my friend,” Brandon said, suddenly feeling a bit apprehensive. When his brother had left home years earlier, Brandon hadn’t been old enough to know much about sexuality.
“Oh?”
“Yes, he’s my boyfriend.”
“Your boyfriend?” Jeremy asked, smiling at his brother. “When did that happen?”
“When did what happen? Me having a boyfriend? Or me being gay?”
“I suppose any of those would be good. Go for it as you see fit.”
“I’ve always been gay,” Brandon said, taking a deep breath. “I knew I was gay before I knew what any of it meant.”
“Good for you, bro,” Jeremy said giving Brandon a quick hug and an encouraging smile. “What made you decide to come out when you did?” Jeremy asked softly.
So Brandon updated his brother on what he’d missed.
“What about you?” Brandon asked. “Is there anyone special in your life?”
“Not at the moment. Kind of difficult when you keep the work schedule I do.”
Brandon wanted to argue, but he didn’t have a clue how to go about it.
“Are you…?”
“Am I what, Bran?” his brother asked, looking a bit tense.
“Are you happy?” Brandon asked and was pleased to see his brother visibly relax.
“For the moment. I’m making good money. I’ve got a life. It’s not the one I want forever, but I’m not planning to work there forever. But for now it suits me.”
“What brought you back home now?” Brandon asked.
“When I learned what the old man had been pulling with you I had to come back to check up on you. I had to make sure you were going to be okay.”
“Really?” Brandon asked, stunned.
“Yeah, really. Just because I was gone, that doesn’t mean that I stopped thinking about you back here. I tried to keep tabs on you through Joel’s sister. When I didn’t like some of the last few things I was hearing, I knew it was time to haul my butt back here and see for myself what was going on.”
“Wow, man. That’s awesome. Thanks.”
“Hey, we’re brothers. And with our family situation the way it is, we’re all we’ve got.”
“Wow.” Brandon was quiet for a moment. “I heard you saw Dad. Why?”
“I had to get something from him,” Jeremy said simply. “Think you and I could take a walk? I need to tell you something.”
“Sure,” Brandon agreed, giving Joel and Tyler a worried look.
“Do you want us to follow along?” Tyler asked.
“No,” Jeremy said. “Why don’t you all wait here? We’ll be back in a little while. We’ve got some stuff to talk over.”
Brandon could see Tyler’s reluctance for which he was quietly grateful. Giving Tyler a smile to try to tell him to relax, Brandon walked down the driveway with his
brother. The two were quickly out of sight of Tyler’s house.
They walked for perhaps two or three minutes without either brother saying a word. Finally Jeremy said, “You probably don’t remember this, but when our grandfather died he left money for both of us, you and me, that was placed in a trust until we reached eighteen. I was gone by the time mine matured, and you’ve just turned eighteen, so both of us are entitled to our inheritance now.”
“I never knew there was any money. He never said a word to me about money.”
“And in your case, there’s more because I heard he wouldn’t give you any of your event earnings.”
“How did you—”
“I’ve kept up with things. I have my sources.”
“Well, it’s true. We had one hell of a fight about it. I asked him for my money and he told me my expenses used it all up. I kind of accused him of stealing my money, and he didn’t like that.”
“I can’t imagine that he would. He’s such a fucking cheapskate. Do you know how much money he cleared after the sale of his company?”
“Not a clue. He’d never talk about anything like that.”
“Close to eight million dollars.”
“Eight… million… dollars? Are you serious?”
“I am. And that’s after all the expenses were paid for lawyers and all that stuff. So I reminded him that he’d promised us both that he was going to send us to college. It may be too late for me, but the timing is perfect for you.”
“No—”
“Let me finish,” Jeremy said. “You are just about to start college—”
“Not if I can’t pay for it.”
“Well, that’s where I come in.” Jeremy handed Brandon an envelope.
“What’s this?” Brandon asked, flipping the envelope over a couple of times.
“Open it and find out,” Jeremy instructed.
Swimming to Freedom Page 16