by S. K Munt
‘He gave us all the free will to return that he denied Miguel,’ the golden man said softly, ‘and the others did all return to Heaven, eventually. But I couldn’t. I was enamoured with the human world as Satan and Miguel were and had spent most of my life in Heaven at God’s side before Armageddon, so living here was more of a novelty to me than it was to the others, so I stayed longer and God allowed it because my feathers had always been the purest and were never compromised.’ He glanced at Satan. ‘Plus, I was terrified that she’d return once God’s back was turned, and knew that once Miguel’s mortal life came to an end, the world might end up in the clutches of her dark Nephilim, so I lingered to hunt them out while helping the humans, knowing that the gates to Heaven would remain open to me so long as my feathers remained white.’
‘Translation- he was as nice as the most boring pie there ever was,’ Satan said, and the golden man gave her a look that was probably supposed to be threatening but translated only to being a blander smile. ‘He never sinned, was never ambitious or proud or vain- he was perfect, just like you were before the Barachiel’s got to you.’ She nudged him with her elbow. ‘Inside and out, right baby?’
‘Baby?’ I repeated, horrified, but my father laughed. ‘You’re an item?!’
‘She’s teasing me, Larkin. Satan has never gotten over Miguel, and so she and I have no romantic feelings towards one another whatsoever.’
‘I don’t even like him much,’ Satan joked, ‘but he is rather handsome, isn’t he?’ and when the golden man blushed and smiled, I smiled too to see that he was taking her sharp humour with an abundance of good humour. It reminded me of how Kohén had always taken my gentle ribbing with a smile.
‘She was never very aware of the rest of us soul mates when she was still counted as one of us, not with Miguel around to catch and hold her eye as he did,’ the angel teased back, ‘and she didn’t even know I was still alive until after I had begun to die.’
‘Oh I was aware of you,’ Satan huffed, ‘I just didn’t care.’
‘You… you died?’ I asked, wondering if that meant that he truly was a ghost. ‘What happened?’
‘A lot of things…’ The man pulled me down, he perching on one rock while indicating that I should sit on the other by the fire, and I sank willingly, fascinated by his story and the dynamic between them, which was confounding. ‘I’d lived dozens of human lives by that point, Larkin, always in a new place, with a new name, and I was fully invested in every one, trying to find a new way to make Miguel’s sacrifice count while living life to the fullest while I could. I’d always accomplished what I’d set out to do, righting some wrong or preventing some disaster, and I think I got addicted to being pious, and that became vanity and…’ he sighed. ‘Eventually I got in over my head, my feathers began to lose their integrity and like the opportunist she is, Satan felt me at my weakest and pounced-’
‘You called to me-’
‘While out of my head with fear!’ the angel smiled reassuringly at me. ‘She promised me to save my life when it was first threatened. I tried to resist her, just like you did, but I was put through more distress and my feathers began to malt so rapidly…’ he looked down at my hand in his and smiled tenderly before looking back up at me, and it was only then that I realised that not only was I holding onto him, but I was hypnotised by him! For so long I’d dreaded this moment and yet here I was… awestruck. He was as beautiful as I’d remembered- tanned skin, golden hair with bright eyes that shifted colours, just like mine, and he spoke with a clipped accent that made music out of his words. ‘I got trapped in a human conundrum, you may say, caused by a heartless Nephilim-’
‘That I had no connection with!’ Satan pointed out quickly, looking at me. ‘Yes they are all descendants from my old soul-mates, but as soon as they lost their wings, I lost the ability to keep an eye on them, as God did with the light, all right?’
‘She’s telling the truth,’ my father conceded. ‘But I still had my wings, and dark nephilim are attracted and intrigued by energy like mine when they feel it- as they are inclined to destroy it. So this girl knew what I really was, and wanted to make an example of me to spite all that is holy, which she reviled.’ He sighed. ‘It quickly became apparent that I’d been softened by my experiences on earth- shielded from how dangerous some beings could be because the humans I’d all known had been relatively harmless and as devoted to God as I- so I was not equipped to face off with her.’
‘What did she do?’ I asked, hurting for him when I saw the anguish in his eyes.
‘Told them that I was dark Nephilim… or alluded to it, at least, and then set a series of traps for me to prove it true that I naively walked right into. They believed the lies that she told about me after that, so they punished me for things I had not done… they whipped me, accused me of unspeakable acts, branded me, poisoned me with gold-’
‘You’re allergic to it too?!’ I demanded, and he nodded grimly.
‘Yes, and she knew it. So when I reacted to it, that was proof to them, see?’
‘To who?’
‘The Barachiel family, who I sadly despise now, which saddens me because once, I’d thought the world of Miguel Barachiel too, and had only wanted to help his ancestors, not harm them as she led them to believe!’ the man shook his head and I squeezed his hand, letting him know silently that he was not the only one to have suffered that fate. He smiled weakly and went on: ‘And of course, they didn’t want anyone finding out that there were still dark Nephilim about, so they hid that fact and threw me over that fence, where I lay for days dying a slow, torturous death- the kind of death that they believed only a dark Nephilim deserved, to send a message to any others that might be loitering nearby.’ His golden brows pulled in together. ‘It was awful, but I didn’t care about my life- I didn’t even care about getting into Heaven by that point, so hurt and jaded was I… but then I remembered that if I died while my feathers were skeletal, God would feel my loss and be drawn down to avenge it- and that would mean the end of the world, most likely, not because the humans deserved it, but because a Nephilim had interfered as I’d always feared. So…’
‘So he called out to me and I showed up and made him an offer that he couldn’t refuse,’ Satan said, winking at me as she quoted one of my favourite books. ‘Well, he refused it and eight others but finally we agreed on an arrangement that was to his liking-’
‘She’d save and then prolong my life until I’d gotten my feathers back,’ he said, squeezing my hand again, ‘buying the human race time to evolve beyond needing so much divine intervention, and giving me the chance to finish what I’d started while maintaining the right to one day, return to Heaven. She wouldn’t get my soul because I refused to hate God for what a Nephilim had done, but God wouldn’t find out that another archangel had fallen and draw him back either, so she generously lowered the price for me when she saw that it would benefit her too, and I have been paying it since.’
I glanced at Satan. ‘What price?’
She met my eyes without flinching. ‘He’d be my slave, of course. I let him keep his pesky soul to give to God one day, and haven’t made him do anything untoward that would blacken his remaining feathers… but until he finishes what he started- he belongs to me.’
As I do until I’ve done the three things she’s asked of me, right? I thought, and shivered when Satan winked and nodded.
‘And we made that deal some years ago,’ my father admitted, casting a weary look Satan’s way. ‘I thought I’d be able to accomplish all I’d dreamed of by now, but someone’s kept me in purgatory by keeping me busy with a never-ending to-do list-’
‘Which suits your purposes as much as it does mine,’ Satan pointed out, looking irked and telling me that this wasn’t the first time they’d bickered over this point.
‘So you say…’ but he was still smiling and I was amazed to think that I’d ever considered that smile to be off-putting. It wasn’t his darkness that had made me feel so uneasy, but his
light! Who could trust such kind words, in a world where kind words were usually spoken to cover an insult? Who could stare so directly into such an unfaltering smile and steady gaze? It was like staring into the sun! And I’d inherited half of his genetics? It was astonishing to me!
‘Anyway Larkin…’ he said, and I looked from his smile back to his eyes, which I were amazed to see had turned lavender. ‘Creating you with her at her behest was the scariest thing I’ve ever done. I feared the repercussions for us all, and have hated being trapped on the other side of that fence since you were born- forced to watch and wait and pray for you… but when I look at you now, and think of all you’ve endured and accomplished…’ he smiled, regarding me with wonder as his eyes scanned my face. ‘I feel like perhaps conceiving you was my true purpose all along, and that I wasted my last life trying to do something that you were always meant to accomplish anyway.’ His hand squeezed mine. ‘It makes me wish that I had procreated earlier and saved the world by giving them you when you were first needed.’
My heart thunked in my chest, as I tore my eyes off him and flitted them to Satan, and back again. Gone was her teasing smile- and the apprehension in her eyes had returned. ‘You conceived me…. with her?’ I felt the blood rush to the surface of my skin again. That pain in my stomach twanged again, becoming hot all of sudden, and I gasped to realise what it was. ‘I am Satan’s child?!’
‘An angel!’ Satan repeated, looking indignant. ‘Half light, half dark and the only one in existence! And I’ve already been more of a mother to you than Sapphire was so please, dial down the revulsion a notch, okay? You’re hurting my feelings.’
‘Why don’t you dial down the flippancy?’ my father demanded of her. ‘Acting so aloof at such a moment when you know that I know how much you’ve anticipated this! And how desperately this child needs to feel loved and protected!’
‘I can’t help it, Bastien!’ she snapped, and I almost fell off the rock she’d sat me on. ‘God made me the way I am, so it is not my fault that I don’t have the ability to communicate my affection for her as eloquently as you do, is it?’ she pointed her finger at me. ‘I wept! Just minutes ago! I was so gladdened to see her emerge from Hell that I wept! Can’t that be enough to satisfy you for now, or must I bake cookies and braid her hair to prove how exalted I am to be a mother again while you explain immaculate conception to her?’
‘Bastien?!’ Flames flared out of my fingertips as I scurried back against the sand and into the water, inadvertently dousing them and causing them to hiss and steam. ‘Shepherd Bastien Birch?’
Shep looked at me, eyebrows raised. ‘You’ve heard of me?’ and then alarmed flickered across his face as he rose. ‘Oh Larkin, nothing you’ve heard is true, I swear it! That girl made it all up- I was trying to save her from Eden, but she wanted to destroy it and anyone that got in her way! I would have seen it coming if I’d used my wings but I’ve never allowed any human to see them for fear of what they’d do to me!’
‘His real name is Raphael, if that helps,’ Satan said, coming over to help me out of the sand. ‘He didn’t get a personal mention in the Six Books Of Creation so it’s okay if you haven’t heard of him. It was different in the old world, but he’s been rather inconsequential to this new one, nellipot that he’s become…’
Gabriel, the angel that tried to guide people with wisdom and healing! I thought, casting my mind back to my theology studies, and then to what I recalled of the bible. That’s why he’s spent so much time helping people privately instead of forming a new country with his ancestors as the old ones did! His calling has not changed since the dawn of time!
‘Huh… you are well read…’ my mother said, taking the thoughts from my mind and I ground my teeth together in anger, tugged my arm out of Satan’s grip and then collapsed back against the cave wall, glowering at her. ‘Or, thoroughly read, at least.’ She smiled at my father. ‘She knows you,’ and he looked pleased. ‘Big fan.’
‘Shut up!’ I snapped at her. ‘Yes I’ve heard of him, but your reputation is the opposite of inconsequential and that’s what’s throwing me here! If all that is good in me is due to him, then all that is bad in me is due to you, right? I am literally the spawn of Satan!’ Tears filled my eyes as I pressed my hand to my aching stomach. ‘I read banned books because of you! If my blood had been tested, I would have been killed- and yet you put me in that place on PURPOSE?!’
‘Yes,’ Satan said quietly, taking my wrists and pulling them down while my head spun in dizzying circles all over again. She winced at the sight of my tears. ‘But I had a good reason for doing it Larkin and if you’ll remember… I tried very hard to get you out of there when I realised that you were in real peril- but you didn’t listen to me, did you? A point I hope you’re going to rectify from now on!’
But I could barely hear a word she was saying now that it all hit me. Martya was alive, and so were all of the Barachiel sons, if Satan had done as I’d asked. I was an angel, my father was Bastien Birch and the Archangel Raphael, my mother was the devil and I was supposed to champion all their causes now or something without pissing off God and causing him to intervene? It was all too much! In fact, I think it was more than anyone else in the world had EVER been expected to do, and it was terrifying! And the way I’d come into the world… it was mind-boggling, and sort of gross. My biological parents didn’t even like each other, and if Sapphire had lain with a woman then she must have lain with Satan but…
‘She was a vessel,’ Satan said softly, watching me carefully with her eyes while picking through my thoughts with her mind. ‘She took me into her arms, and I took over her. Then I beckoned Bastien in and… I had no other options, Larkin. I couldn’t create people out of my energy the way God could while ninety-eight percent of the existing population were devout to him, and without a mortal, fertile body of my own I was limited-’
‘Weren’t you castrated?’ I demanded of Bastien Birch, already doubting all I’d believed to be good about him. ‘Chemically?’
‘The gold did the job, but Satan reversed that too,’ Bastien said.
‘But you seem like a ghost!’ I cried. ‘I’ve seen you flicker and fade, and you can’t seem to breech that fence so how could you touch me now- or touch mother dearest here at all?’
‘The flickering and fading is part of my own powers,’ Bastien said softly. ‘I can vanish, if need be- on a molecular level, which is why I encouraged you to take my hand because it would transfer to you, and keep you safe. And I could not breech that fence because your mother - this one- forbade me doing so to keep me from liberating you early, which I was desperate to do the moment I saw you with my own eyes…’ he smiled sadly. ‘But I’m not dead Larkin. Often I don’t feel alive and I always feel as though I am haunting this world… but I cannot physically die until I have earned my feathers back by fulfilling my purpose- to eliminate the Given caste once and for all with your help.’
‘But Constance was intuitive and she sensed darkness in you!’ I cried.
‘She sensed my hate for her because she had hurt you!’ Bastien snapped, showing a flare of temper for the first time. ‘There isn’t a Barachiel on this earth that wouldn’t feel my hatred for them all with one look at my face! In fact, it is probably my hatred for them that keeps my feathers in disrepair!’
I racked my brain, fanning myself as my temperature steadily rose. ‘But what about the other baby?’ I demanded, thinking of that awful trial I’d witnessed. ‘There have been others, haven’t there? So do I have little angel siblings getting around that you-’
‘I have NEVER had another child!’ Raphael protested, lilac eyes darkening as mine did. ‘Not since I was first created, and that I swear to you, my darling- I may not have been a father to you, but you are the only daughter I have ever known.’
‘They were lying, Larkin,’ Satan said quickly, when my mouth popped open. ‘Those women got babies on their backs the old fashioned way and cried rape or coercion to hide it. When they tried to thro
w the babies over the fence however, your father was always there to catch them, and so they used him as a scapegoat. The babies that they’d claimed had been immaculately conceived were taken away, had their blood tested, and then were spat back into the third-born system once it was determined that they were all completely human- and often matched the DNA of the mother’s male neighbour when it didn’t match her actual spouse’s.’
‘That’s awful!’ I cried.
‘That’s humanity,’ Bastien said sadly, stepping up beside her. ‘And it’s always been repellent to you because you have less of it than any of them and a divine soul.’
I stared at him, digesting that while feeling an awful headache coming on. ‘So what happened to the babies that you were passed that didn’t get discovered?’
He smiled at me warmly. ‘They are waiting for you to join them, just like all of the others.’
‘What others?’
‘The Sequestered,’ Satan said. ‘That part Martya has already explained to you, yes?’
Oh Martya had explained it, partially at least, but it still didn’t make any sense to me, and my curiosity was so overwhelmed by questions that I was feeling light-headed. There were babies waiting to meet me? I was going to help father wipe out the Given Caste? This had to be a warped dream, or another, impassable level of Hell!
Having wings is hard enough to come to terms with! I thought, feeling panicky and claustrophobic again. But... saving the world from God’s wrath? Immaculate conception? Jesus Christ!
‘Close,’ my mother said, reading my mind again and smiling, ‘but you’re a lot prettier- and twice as powerful as Gabriel’s first child was.’ She leaned in and wrapped her arms around me in a tight embrace, lifting my face to hers and smiling wickedly. ‘And soon enough, everyone will know it!’
I stared into her eyes and felt not fear- but a growing sense of anticipation now. ‘What is it I have to do?’
Satan sighed, looking apprehensive. ‘You have to break that curse or find your way onto a powerful throne. That would have been accomplished more easily if you’d let them all die, but you have asked me to save them and I can only do what is asked of me or what I want for myself so long as it doesn’t interfere with free will. It is good for your feathers that you have saved them, and good for mankind because I think God would return if he felt the loss of Miguel’s entire legacy... but despite your powers, you were born from a mortal woman and not hand-crafted by God, so you can still be killed my dear- rather easily- and soon, they will try to do exactly that, and I will not be able to linger much longer to shield you as I have tonight.’