"Aunt Christie, when are you coming home?"
For a moment her mind went blank. When was she coming home? When the heartache lessened, when the memories faded? Where was home? Her apartment had been rented, her furniture sold. With the exception of Eric, she had no reason to go back.
"I’m not sure, Eric. How about if I make you a promise that we’ll see each other by the end of the summer?"
"Okay. Then I’ll be able to tell you about summer camp," he said, excitement entering his voice.
Christie’s heart tripped and then speeded up. "You’re going to camp?" Her sister had thought Eric was too young to attend camp.
"Yes, Daddy said I could."
"You’ll have to tell me all about it." She tried to keep her voice neutral, but her thoughts raced with worry. What did Darrell know about keeping a five-year old safe?
"I will. Daddy wants to talk to you again. I love you Aunt Christie."
The tightness in her throat threatened to choke her. "I love you too, sweetheart."
"So when are you coming home?" Darrell asked in her ear.
Christie closed her eyes. "I’m not. I-I like it here at Winding Creek. I’m staying awhile."
"Where is Winding Creek?"
"I’m in Kentucky."
"Geez! Christie, don’t you think you’re carrying this a bit too far? What the hell was your sister doing in Kentucky?"
Darrell’s barely concealed anger made her hunch her shoulders. She knew from past experience Darrell would voice his opinion whether she wanted to hear it or not. He used to ride roughshod over Ellen, even though she had to admit he’d made her sister happy. "Eric said he’s going to camp?"
"Yes." She heard the steel in his tone.
"Do you think he’ll be happy there?" she asked carefully.
"He wants to go, it’s a kid’s camp. They’ve got riding and swimming. I did check it out." He was Eric’s father and she had nothing to say in the matter.
She persisted anyway. "It’s just that Ellen felt he was too young."
"I know what Ellen’s thoughts were on camp. I don’t agree. He’ll have a good time, meet kids of his own age. Besides, it’s just a day camp, not overnight."
Relief filtered through her. "Oh, I thought he would be away overnight."
He made an impatient sound. "I’m not an idiot. Eric isn’t ready to stay away overnight. We both know I’ve screwed up in the past," he added, "but I'm taking good care of my son."
She had questioned Darrell’s suitability as a father. Was she so unforgiving she would risk hurting her relationship with her sister’s only child? She knew in her heart Darrell had always been a good father, she couldn’t take that away from him. That’s why she’d been able to leave. She knew Darrell needed time with his son.
"You’re right, Darrell. I’m sorry. I know you’ve always done what was best for Eric." When he walked away from Ellen he had left Eric with her. Losing her son would have devastated her sister.
His tone softened a bit. "You’ve had a rough time, Christie." He let out a deep breath. "I know we’ve never gotten along that great, but you’re always welcome here when you’re ready to come back."
Her throat ached with unshed tears. "That means a lot to me. Eric is my last link with Ellen."
"Christie," he said tiredly, "I’m his father. You know the judge’s ruling is the way it should be."
The truth in his words didn’t lessen the hurt and loss she felt deep inside. Ellen had asked her to take care of Eric and she had lost him. Christie felt incredibly tired, confused. "I’m going to go now. I’ll call again. Goodnight."
"Wait, let me know how to get in touch with you."
She hesitated. "I’ll send you the address. Good bye, Darrell." Christie pressed the disconnect button, knowing she wouldn’t send him the address. For now, she needed to be on her own.
###
Garrett found Christie sitting alone on living room terrace. Her bare feet rested on his wicker footstool and her dark silky head rested against the cushioned back of his chair. She held the cordless phone in her lap, one of her hands still curled around it.
He stood in the living room doorway, gripping the wide curved handles of the French doors that stood slightly ajar. Christie hadn’t seen him yet. Even in T-shirt and jeans, he realized she was eye catching. It was strange, but he hadn’t noticed how attractive she was when she first arrived in town. Of course, with Ruth’s good food, she didn’t look as tired or thin as that first day either. For a brief moment, he wondered how hungry she had been and knew she’d never tell him. He had a feeling there were a lot of things Christie kept to herself. She had a stoic air that hinted at things better left unsaid. Judith had always joked about her horrible childhood. Garrett had never really known what stories were truth and what she’d exaggerated.
Garrett studied what he could see of her profile, sensing a certain vulnerability there. But there was something undeniably sexy and alluring about her face, the slim nose and full lips.
"Christie." He stepped outside, his boots scraping across the stone floor. She looked up at him. Garrett felt a rush of adrenaline. He clenched his fists, then flexed his fingers, wondering at the expectant look on her face. He remembered the last time they’d been close, the kiss they had shared. It had been a simple kiss, but one that had stuck in his memory all week. He wasn’t sure why, anymore than he was certain why he’d sought her out after settling Hannah in bed. Something had drawn him out here tonight. Curiosity? Desire? If only it was something as simple as mere desire. Garrett shook that dangerous thought from his head. Desire led to sex which led to complications.
"Hi, Garrett."
She curled toward him in the chair and he moved closer.
"Hannah and I just got back from town."
"I haven’t seen her all day," she said.
"She’s been with my mom. I put her to bed since she’s not feeling well."
"Have you had her to the doctor?" Her voice tense with concern, her urgency surprised him.
"It’s just a cold."
Christie sat up straight. "I know kids get colds all the time. But when I was little I never got sick."
"Never?" he asked with disbelief.
"Not that I remember." She hesitated and then added, "My sister Ellen was always sick. She wasn’t real strong. I looked after her. We were a team."
"I’m sorry, Christie. You’ve had a double loss."
She turned her head away. "I miss her," she said in a low voice. "And Judith." She looked back at him. "But you understand how it is when you love someone. When they’re gone from your life it’s a void that can never be filled. At times it’s still unreal."
"Christie. . ." Garrett didn’t say the words that would disillusion her about his relationship with Judith. He heard the pain in her voice and understood the sense of loss she felt. Judith, however, had squeezed out all the love he’d felt for her long before she had left. Garrett clenched his fists.
Christie’s face held a sweet innocence, similar to the trust in his daughter’s face. How could he extinguish that by telling her the ugly truth about his marriage? About her sister. . ..
"I know how you feel," he said simply. "I lost my Dad a few years ago. It seemed like he’d be around forever. Brothers and sisters have a special bond too. It sounds like you and Ellen were really close. Randy and I are pretty tight, most of the time." Garrett grimaced. "I ride him about his carefree lifestyle and he gives me a hard time about working all the time."
"You two must have been some pair while growing up."
"We were inseparable, but things change. Randy’s got his life in town and I’m out here."
Garrett pulled up a chair and sat beside her. He lifted his feet onto the footstool, staring at his boots next to her delicately curved bare feet.
Needing some action, he reached over and removed the cell phone from her hands, then placed it on the table beside him.
Christie stared at him blankly for a moment. "I made a long dis
tance call to my nephew. Let me know how much it is so I can reimburse you. Hannah has a first cousin, you know. He’s younger than her and his name is Eric."
Carefully, he took her hand. She looked so wrapped up in her thoughts that he had to give her some form of comfort. Maybe to let her know she wasn’t alone. "Memories getting to you, huh, Christie?"
Her hands were cool, the fingers slender against his rough and calloused hands. Surely it wouldn’t hurt to offer each other friendship and a bit of caring on this quiet Kentucky night.
Christie’s fingers moved. No longer passive in his palm, they gripped his fingers with strength.
"The memories are nothing I can’t handle." As she looked up at him the soft glow of the overhead lamp showed the smile curving her lips. "You’re one heck of a cowboy, Garrett. Running this place, raising a little girl."
He gave an amused laugh. "Honey, cowboys are a dime a dozen out here. Somehow, I don’t think you’ve had much experience with them."
"You’re right about that." She threw him a sidelong glance. "I wouldn’t mind getting to know at least one of them better while I’m here."
"Since several of my men have lined up to ask you out, I’m sure you’ll have plenty of opportunity," he remarked, staring out into the dark night. "You’re young, you should go out and have a good time. No reason to sit around on a night like this." If the better part of him didn’t feel so scarred he’d even think about pursuing her.
Christie shrugged in an offhand manner. "I’m the new face around here so of course they’ve asked me out," she said simply. "But I wasn’t talking about any of your men." She sat forward in the chair, her eyes soft and vulnerable.
"Do you want to ask me out Garrett?"
Her question took him by surprise. He breathed in her clean scent. Feminine, something fresh, like flowers and laundry soap. Her dark eyes were so close he felt as if he looked into her heart.
He stared at her warily as she touched his rough-whiskered cheek with tenderness. "I’m not one for games or waiting in line," he said harshly. "I did it once, I’ll never do it again."
"I don’t play games, Garrett." Her voice was deadly serious. "Life is too short."
It had been a long time since he had tried to read the signals a woman sent out, maybe too long to think he could get it right. Damn, but Garrett wanted to believe Christie wouldn’t mind him kissing her again. But then, maybe she would let one of his ranch hands kiss her too. "Maybe you just want a cowboy experience." His voice was harsh, he knew it.
"No."
Garrett stood, pushing his chair back. Christie stood also and leaned toward him just the slightest bit. Feeling her warmth, drawn in by the quiet, waiting quality in her face, Garrett thought maybe he didn’t care if that’s all she was after. Maybe he could learn to play that game.
He bent slowly, unable in that moment to deny himself the pleasure of kissing her. He pulled her to him until they stood inches apart. Lightly, he brushed her mouth with his. Sensation rocked him. He closed his eyes, repeating the light caress. A groan built inside his chest. He wanted to lift her off her feet, bury his face in her neck, the fragrance of her hair, and maybe take her inside and into his room. It had been a long time. Garrett cupped her face and kissed her again, deeper, and her lips parted to welcome him as her hands gripped his arms.
"Not here," he said, and he took a step toward the living room doors. He hit something with the toe of his boot and looked down. A doll. Hannah’s doll.
The sight of that jolted him. He swallowed hard. He wasn’t a kid. He had a daughter to think about, a life he was getting back on track. He dropped his hands. He had only taken a taste of Christie, but that taste made him want more. Iron control kept him still and his arms at his side.
In the next moment Christie’s hands crept up his shoulders. The pads of her fingers rubbed the worn fabric of his shirt. His shoulders tensed in anticipation and his body grew tight with wanting but he stiffened his resolve. Better to stop now before things went further.
He put his hands up to push hers away. Their fingers tangled. Of their own volition, his fingers curled around hers, holding them captive, squeezing. He stared at her intently, sending a silent message that he was serious.
Christie watched him. Garrett could almost feel the quick, shallow breaths she drew into her lungs. He heard the sudden intake of her breath as he settled one hand at the small of her back. She arched against him, her breasts touching his chest, her eyes half closing.
He groaned. For his own curiosity, for this momentary insanity, he would let her get close to him. He needed to be close to her. It felt as natural as breathing.
She dropped her head back and looked at him through half-closed lids. Garrett tensed as she ran her tongue ran over her lips. He needed to taste those lips.
"Christie." He cupped her face, his calloused hands gentle on her cheeks. With one hand he cradled the nape of her neck. Her skin felt so soft, so warm, her bones fragile under the skin. He lowered his head and touched her mouth. The taste and texture of Christie wound through him, insidious, alarming in its subtlety. Any lingering intentions to step back fled. He wanted this moment and the consequences be damned.
Slowly, provocatively, he traced her lips with his tongue. Christie reciprocated, then ran her tongue lightly along the rim of his teeth. Her softness, her willingness to be wooed drew him in further, making him ignore the warnings in his head.
Heat raced across him, swirling around them as the sounds of the night faded away. It was only he and Christie. Garrett moved closer, then gripped her hips and pulled her tightly against him. The groan in his chest rumbled, releasing itself on the night air.
Raw need filled him, the desire to be close to a woman. The desire to feel a woman's soft skin against his own.
Her lashes fluttered and her eyes opened. Garrett felt like he’d been punched in the gut. Emotion, unspoken want tugged at him. For a moment, he thought he would drown in those eyes. Slowly, he released the breath he was holding and drew in several more. Christie blinked as if she had trouble focusing. Her silky dark brows drew together as she studied him curiously. He knew the moment she regained control of her breathing, her senses. The slightly glazed look in her eyes faded, gave way to that bit of wariness that always seemed to lurk there.
He looked away from her mouth, clenched his teeth, glad of the shadows around them. Damn! He didn’t need to complicate his life by acting on a damned impulse.
Garrett stepped back and moved to the edge of the terrace. Somewhere, a wild dog howled. It was a familiar sound, but tonight, it sounded so lonely, so desperate. He shoved his hands in his pockets, aware of his own brand of desperation.
He stared somberly out into the night. "Christ, I'm about to apologize again." Garrett knew the gently rolling hills were out there but the darkness hid them from view. "Flings, affairs -- they’re not my style." He laughed. "Hell, I don’t have a style. Randy has a style." Randy had dated more women than most, while he was just a rancher with a young daughter trying to make a decent living. He’d learned during his brief marriage he didn’t know squat about women.
"Why apologize?" she asked. "I helped the matter along."
"Yeah, well. . ." He stopped. "I don’t make a practice of necking with my employees out on the terrace." He needed to say those words baldly. He needed to shock her to create some breathing distance between them.
He had to put what had happened in stark black and white terms, bring it into sharp focus so it would lose some of its potency. He wanted to dispel that damnable sense of magic taking place. Magic and miracles were illusions, the stuff of dreams. His boots were firmly on the ground. A failed marriage and the responsibility of an eight year old kept you on terra firma.
"So, I guess I’m the first employee to earn that honor?" she asked dryly.
Garrett turned quickly. He’d expected anger, maybe chagrin. Not humor.
With one brow raised, she continued calmly, "I’m the first employee that you’ve
honored by necking out here on the terrace?"
"This isn’t a joke," he bit out, surprised by the slight smile curving her lips. He crushed the urge to yank her close and kiss her again.
"No, it’s not. It’s mutual attraction between two people." Her voice grew passionate. "Don’t try to take that away, Garrett. One thing I’ve learned is life’s too short to waste it on regrets over what we should have done."
Grimly, he thought of Judith and their married life.
"It gets too short when you follow one impulse after another. Ultimately the impulses break your life apart. They can bring you to the edge of bankruptcy and almost cost you everything you’ve worked so hard for." He clenched his jaw.
She studied his face. "You're speaking from experience."
"Whatever’s between us --" He ignored the disappointment that flared in her eyes. "We’re too different to think of pursuing a relationship. You’re Judith’s sister and leaving in a few weeks. Why pursue something that doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of surviving?" Would she stay if he asked her? Garrett discarded that notion. Kim would be ready to return to her job and Christie would have to leave.
"Maybe you’re right. Let’s pretend this never happened," she said briskly, crossing her arms. "I’m game if you are."
He felt irritated that she agreed so easily.
Christie took several steps away from him. "I was wondering what plans you have for the apartment over the barn?" she said in a sudden change of topic.
Garrett didn’t answer right away, trying to mentally switch gears. "I’m not in any rush to decide. Eventually I plan to make it into another office, but that’s probably a year down the road."
"Will you rent it to me while I’m here? You could think of it as way to get me out of your hair. You and Hannah would have the house back to yourselves. You’ve been really generous to allow me to live here, but I’d feel more comfortable knowing I wasn’t in the way."
Garrett knew she was right to put distance between them, but he felt reluctant to agree, which was contrary to his earlier rejection of her closeness. "You’re only going to be here for another few weeks," he said, reminding himself also of that fact. It was what she had agreed to from the beginning, but it felt like such a short time now.
Echoes From The Past (Women of Character) Page 10