“We’re gonna find the person who did this to you, and then we’re gonna make them pay,” Dad says.
“Dad…money is not going to fix this.” I pull back from him. “It’s not like people can unsee the picture.”
“That’s not the point. The point is that whoever took your picture and posted it committed a sexual offense. We have to make sure whoever it is never does it again.” A sexual offense…I hadn’t even thought of it that way. “But, listen, Gio came over and told me everything. I am so sorry for yellin’ earlier—”
“Don’t worry about it.” I pull into him again. “Just hold me. Please.” Dad holds me against him like he did when I was a scared little girl back home.
Chapter 14
June 7, 2015
New Worst Day of My Life
Well, I guess I just officially became a celebrity. It seems the rite of passage for becoming a real famous girl always involves some kind of nip slip, wardrobe malfunction, nude photo, or sex video. I just managed to accomplish three of those all in one step. Now that my dues are paid, I guess I can rest easy. I’m officially famous. Hooray!
Anyone who can’t see the obvious sarcasm dripping off the paragraph above needs to be held under water.
This is horrific. Someone took a picture of me when my swimsuit flipped down and proceeded to post it online. People must really be obsessed with Dad’s return, because my story has been “breaking the Internet” for the past ten hours. They’re calling me names I didn’t even know existed and railing against me for taking Dad away just to come back like this. My hopes and dreams of someday reinventing my image in the public eye are all but destroyed. Now everyone sees me as the girl who was dropped off in a basket, wrecked W3, and got naked at a pool party in front of everyone.
I am officially a total screw-up. Not only have I screwed up my own life, but I screwed up everybody else’s too. I’ve cried myself out, and now all I want to do is hide. Actually, hiding isn’t enough. I want to disappear. Dematerialize. Cease to exist.
I wish people knew it was an accident. It would make me look stupid, but at least it might make them stop defaming my character and making me out to be a whore. I’m the furthest thing from a whore. In fact, now I’m wondering if I’ll ever want to get naked again.
Thank God for Dad, Ana, and Cass. They’re keeping me sane right now. I’m not letting anyone see me, but they’re bringing things to my room for me and trying to keep me as calm and comfortable as possible. Gio has texted me a few times, but after seeing myself on the news, I’m too embarrassed to acknowledge his existence. This is so far beyond ‘humiliating.’ If a person can’t die of excitement, I’m almost certain now that one can die of mortification.
Ttyl if I’m still alive,
Mads
***
I set my laptop on the nightstand after clicking Submit. Then I squirm underneath my covers and pull them up over my head. Everyone else is downstairs having dinner, but I can’t eat. All I want to do is listen to the sounds of random TV shows, zone out, and forget I’m Madison Daley and the whole world has seen me without a shirt. I’m wearing sweat pants and a hoodie under my covers because if I see my own skin, I’m going to want to hurt myself. Being covered feels safe. I snuggle into my pillow and pull it up over my face, feeling like it might even be a risk to let the sun see me right now.
A knock comes at the door, and I pull the covers up even further. “Come in.”
I hear the door swing open. “Hey,” Gio says, and my stomach drops.
“Hey…look, no offense, but I really don’t want to see anyone right now…”
“I understand. I just wanted to bring you something. I guess I’ll set it on the nightstand and go.” I hear the clank of glass on the wooden nightstand, and I turn over and pull the comforter back a little bit to take a peek. It’s a single purple rose in a clear, water-filled vase.
I pull the comforter away from my eyes. “Gio…it’s beautiful.”
“I figured purple was your favorite color besides black. Glad you like it.”
I can now add ‘observant’ to the list of qualities I like about this guy. “Thanks.”
“No problem. Guess I’ll see you later.” Gio turns around to walk out the door, and my heart yearns after him.
“Hey…wait.” He turns back around, and I sit up, holding the comforter in front of me from the shoulders down. “You don’t have to go.”
Gio’s perfect lips turn up in a smile, and he comes back to sit next to me on the bed. “You doing okay?”
I blow out a sigh. “No…not really. I feel…well, I don’t really feel anything. I’m just—”
“Numb. Like feeling anything at all would be too much to handle.”
“Exactly.” I’m amazed at how easily he got that.
Gio brings his hand up toward my face. “May I?” I nod, and he runs his fingers through my hair like he did last night. “Believe me, I know how that is. I’ve been in the news for bad reasons a few times myself, and people said horrible things about me too. You just have to realize they’re not the ones who really matter. If your family and friends know the truth and support you, you’re doing all right.”
“I’m trying to believe that, but they’re all so mean…”
“You’re right. They are mean. Don’t listen to them. You’re beautiful, and you’re definitely not a party girl or a whore. Everyone who matters already knows that.”
My hands lower, bringing the comforter down with them. Much to Gio’s credit, he doesn’t even glance down at my chest. Instead, he smiles and leans in close to my face.
For a second, I think I’m about to get my first kiss, but then he whispers in my ear, “Hey, do you want to go see something pretty and not upsetting at all?”
I pull back, panicking at the mere thought of going outside. “Um…I appreciate the offer, but I’m terrified to go out in public right now. I don’t want any of these horrible comments coming to my face.”
“No one’s going to say it to your face. All those people commenting on your pictures are complete cowards. They’d never have the guts to approach you in person and defame you like that. Trust me, you’re safe.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, and if anyone says a word to you, I’ll punch their ass out,” Gio promises. “You have my word.”
“Um…I dunno…”
“Are you doubting my ass-kicking abilities?” Gio glowers at me in mock offense, and I giggle.
“No, I’m sure you’re incredibly strong.”
Gio pulls me in by my covered arm and kisses my cheek. “Then just trust me, okay? Let me get your mind off your troubles.”
I pull the comforter off my legs, keeping my gaze fixed on my black, manicured fingernails. “Well…okay.”
***
After I’m dressed in jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt, Gio and I take a ride to Santa Monica Beach in his steel-gray Maserati. On the way over he tells me, “The radio’s all yours tonight. Pick a station, any station.”
I scan the stations, and then I stop when I hear a familiar song. “Hey, they’re playing W3!”
“Yeah, I’ve heard W3 in a lot of places lately. I think people are getting nostalgic now that your dad’s back in town.”
“Excellent.” I grin like a villain. “Looks like my missions are right on track.”
“Missions?”
I briefly explain my missions to Gio, leaving out the parts about my mother. At the end of the explanation, he laughs. “Why am I not surprised by this?”
“I dunno, I guess you’re psychic.”
“Nah, you just give off a general evil-mastermind vibe.” He gives me a dimpled grin and a wink.
I sit and watch him drive the rest of the way, loving the way his light blue shirt contrasts sharply against his dark coloring. I can’t help but feel like I don’t really belong in this passenger seat next to him, especially after everything that happened over the weekend. I’m not the kind of girl he deserves at all, but if
Gio doesn’t mind being seen with a weirdo like me, I’m not going to complain.
We arrive at Santa Monica Beach, where the park on the pier is closing and the sun is just starting to dip toward the horizon. Orange and purple streaks are beginning to appear in the sky, and the bit of Pacific Ocean washing up onto the shore is reflecting the pier like smooth glass. Gio and I slip our sandals off as we step onto the warm, fine sand, and he reaches for my hand. I link fingers with him, relishing the feeling of his slightly roughened skin as we walk down the beach.
“This is incredible,” I whisper as the lights on the Ferris wheel come on in the distance. The contrast of the bright pink electric lights against the coral and heather hues of the sunset is nothing short of magical.
“I knew you would like it.” Gio rubs the side of my hand with his thumb. “When I come down here at sunset, it helps me forget about everything and not feel like I need ten shots of whiskey quite as much.”
I turn to look at him with an amused smirk. “You’re a big liquor fan, aren’t you?”
“You have no idea,” Gio says with a chuckle.
“Just curious, what are you doing here in L.A. during the summer?” He raises an eyebrow in confusion. “I mean, on TV, rich kids go out of town to places like Paris and Rome to get away.”
“Well, ironically, Rome is usually where I go in the summer. That’s where my mother lives. This year Papa has a big movie premiere and Mamma’s really busy, so they just decided I would go there for the holidays instead.”
“Your dad has a movie premiere?” He nods. “That is sick!”
“Yeah, I get to walk the red carpet with him again. That never gets old.”
“What’s it like having two homes?” I squeeze his hand. “Being away from your mom all the time must be hard.”
Gio shrugs and looks straight ahead. “It’s all right. Mamma runs a four-star restaurant over there, so she’s never really around anyway.” He quickly turns the attention off himself. “What about you? Did you ever figure out who your mother is?”
I shake my head. “No. I just started trying a couple months ago.”
“You know who I think your mother is?”
“Who?”
“Wonder Woman.” Gio gives me a big, teasing grin. “I mean, it’s pretty obvious.”
I giggle at the flattery. “You really think I’m as hot as Wonder Woman?”
“Hotter. And believe me, that’s saying a lot coming from me.”
My heart begins to pound, and I take a deep breath to steady my voice. “So Gio Abate is a Wonder Woman fan. Finally, this makes sense.”
Confused, he asks, “What do you mean?”
“I mean…you liking me.” I stare at my feet in the sand.
Gio takes my arm and turns me to face him. “Hey…” He inches toward me with a look of concern. “I like you for you.” As he winds his fingers down my cheek and neck, I gaze into his wonderful eyes, which are reflecting the pier and the sunset. “You’re so great, Madness. I wish you could see it.”
“Thanks,” I whisper. I lose my breath as our bodies come fully together. He wraps his arms around me, making me feel safe and vulnerable all at once.
“Take your glasses off,” he says softly, and he smiles at my shocked reaction.
“What?”
“Just take them off.” My hand trembles as I reach up and remove them. Then his head tips down, and I almost squirm out of his embrace in my panic. Oh God…this is it…
In one smooth movement, Gio touches his lips down to mine. At first, I freeze up in my nerves, but then I reach up and dig my fingers into his mass of black hair as I kiss him back. It’s my first kiss ever, and there’s no way it could be any more perfect. We listen to the waves crashing against the shore and seagulls crying above us as the breeze whips my hair against his face. Gio tightens his grip around me, and his lips press down firmly against mine, grasping them over and over and flooding me with euphoria from head to toe. Eventually, we have to come up for air, and Gio breathes against my lips, “You’re amazing.”
“You’re awesome,” I whisper back.
He swallows hard as he tangles his fingers in my hair. “I’ve never had a kiss like that before.”
“I’ve…never had any of this before,” I say with a breathy giggle.
He pulls back with wide eyes. “What? Really?”
Shrugging, I say, “Well…I grew up alone on a farm.”
“But the flirting…the kissing…this was really your first time?”
“Yeah…” I trail off, not sure what to say.
Gio chuckles, flabbergasted. “Well, you’re a natural. And I have to say, it’s really not fair.”
My smile grows so wide that I’m afraid it will split my face. He used my ‘not fair’ phrase. It’s almost like we’re a match made in heaven. “Thanks.”
“You got any notes for me?” There’s a hint of vulnerability in his eyes. I’ve been teaching him how to excel at gaming, but there’s no way he could possibly improve on this.
I wrap my arms around his strong neck and shake my head. “Not this time.” Feeling braver than ever before, I rise onto my tiptoes and press my lips to his again.
Chapter 15
June 7, 2015
Day Redeemed
I feel almost guilty for writing this. It’s like I’m betraying all feminists everywhere. I know a guy isn’t supposed to be allowed to swoop in and save the day, but…
Oh. My. God.
He. Just. Did.
Saying “Giovanni Abate kissed me” would be like saying “Avenged Sevenfold is merely an ‘okay’ band.” Gio didn’t just kiss me. He rocked my world at its core and ruined me for every other guy on the planet. Now I understand why he wanted to tease me and draw it out. Waiting a day to give me what I wanted made me want it that much more.
He is so perfect…which scares the hell out of me. I just know there’s some massive imperfection that’s going to surface and ruin everything. When he was talking about drinking and his mother, it made me realize this guy might have some demons cooped up underneath that joyous smile. He’s always so happy and confident…there’s just got to be a cavernous store of pain locked up in there. When it surfaces, I hope I’m the one who gets to help him through it. After all, I know exactly how he feels when it comes to absentee mothers. We don’t like to talk about the abandonment because most of the time we like to pretend it didn’t happen.
Back at home when I was planning this trip, I kept getting this “feeling” I was supposed to come here this summer. Maybe Gio is the reason. I don’t know much about him yet, but it seems like he’s running away from something, and I might be the only one who knows what he’s running away from. I could be the key to getting him to open up about his past and deal with his feelings instead of drowning them with whiskey, tequila, and partying. Then again, he could be totally fine with the events of his life and he simply enjoys liquor. Honestly, I didn’t mind the feeling I got from that margarita. I wouldn’t mind having another one right now.
Dammit…this could have been the perfect weekend if only I had remembered to pick my glasses up before going over by the pool.
Ttyl,
Mads
***
In the morning, before any sane, normal person would ever be awake on vacation, Dad comes into my room and taps me on the shoulder, waking me up.
“What’s going on?” I moan. Gio brought me straight home after the beach last night, but I had a hard time going to sleep after that mind-blowing, life-altering, still-burning-my-lips first kiss.
“Sorry, baby girl, I couldn’t wait to show you this,” Dad whispers, and I gasp when I turn over to look at what he brought me. It’s a custom-made guitar, blood red with a tan scratch plate and neck, and it has the W3 logo emblazoned in a bold, red, dripping font just below the tailpiece.
“Wow…” I rise slowly to a sitting position.
“It was mine back when I was on my last tour before meeting you,” Dad explains. “T
his was the only custom-made guitar I ever had. I came across it this morning in storage, and I want you to have it…because I love you, and because you’ve been to hell and back this weekend.” He hands the guitar to me, and my hands tremble as I accept it. I feel like I’m handling a holy relic. I run my fingers down the smooth strings and let them fall on the letters at the bottom.
“Oh, Dad, this is beautiful.”
He sits on my bed next to me and gives me a side hug. “I am so sorry I freaked out on you yesterday morning. I just panicked. I had no idea it was all an accident, and I feel terrible you were humiliated like that.”
“It’s okay.” I lean into Dad, appreciating him more than ever. Giving me this guitar is the ultimate act of trust. He really does believe me. “This more than makes up for it.”
“You wanna come downstairs and plug this sucker up to see what she can still do?” Dad asks.
“Hell yeah!”
“Can I get a picture of you with the guitar first?”
My face turns to stone. “Dad, did you really just suggest a picture after—”
“Okay, never mind.”
Completely disregarding the hour, Dad and I set up a couple of amps in the sunroom, and I play the custom guitar while he plays my old one. He teaches me some of the old riffs and solos, and after a while, I’ve forgotten all about my exposure to the world. I’m playing W3 songs on the Grim Weeper’s custom guitar with man himself. Thousands of people would kill to be me right now. Dad teaches me some of the lyrics too, and we work on harmonizing together. Cass and Ana come downstairs after a little bit, and then Cass takes the guitar from him, and we play to the sound of his voice.
I’m still shredding like crazy after both of them have quit, and then Gio comes to the back door. Cass lets him in, and his eyes grow wide as his gaze locks on to me. I keep on playing just to show off for him.
“Hot fucking damn,” he says at the end, not even caring that my dad is standing right there.
Diary of a Rocker's Kid (D.O.R.K Book 1) Page 13