by Lisa Bork
All in all, I considered it a good day. I planted Danny in front of the television when we got home, put the leftover lasagna in the oven, and debated calling Cory. I decided in favor of the nap I’d been craving instead. Cory and I had agreed yesterday that I would return to work full-time next week. This would be a slow week, given the holiday.
The phone rang as my head touched the pillow.
“Mrs. Parker, this is Mrs. Travis. We met this morning at school.”
I sat up. “Yes, of course.”
“We have a little problem. One of the children brought his Nintendo DS to school this morning in his backpack. That’s against school rules, because we do have a theft problem from time to time. Anyway, he reported it missing at lunchtime. We talked to the teachers, and they suspect a boy they saw in the hallway this morning. He matches Danny’s description.”
Shocked and embarrassed, I couldn’t think of a reply.
“I was wondering if you could talk to Danny. The school is closed for the holiday beginning tomorrow, so if he does have the Nintendo, maybe you could bring it in on Monday morning. And of course I’ll want to meet with both of you.”
I was being summoned to the principal’s office for the first time at age thirty-eight. My face burned with shame as I set down the receiver. Although I’d become Erica’s surrogate mother at age twelve, her real troubles hadn’t begun until after her school years. I’d never had to deal with an irate principal. I felt like an instant failure as Danny’s foster parent. What had Ray gotten us into?
Danny was still on the couch where I’d left him. He didn’t look up when I sat down or acknowledge my presence in any way. After opening my mouth a few times then closing it just as fast, I decided to set the table and let Ray deal with it when he got home.
I served dinner as soon as he walked in the door. Danny ate two servings of lasagna again, but tried to leave the table without eating the green beans I’d prepared.
I put my hand on his arm. “Another rule. You have to eat vegetables. The vitamins in them are good for you.”
He looked to Ray for help.
“Jolene’s right. Eat them and you can have two pieces of pie.”
Danny ate them and the pie. “Can I watch TV now?”
I shook my head. “I got a call from the principal this afternoon, Ray. After Danny and I left, they discovered a boy’s Nintendo was missing. The teachers saw a boy matching Danny’s description near the backpack where it was last seen.”
Ray got his “good-cop, bad-cop, whatever-you-need-me-to-be cop” expression going, his poker face showing a hint of intimidation this time. “Danny?”
“I found it on the floor. Finders keepers.”
“Go get it.”
He slinked away from the table and returned minutes later, holding the shiny black box in his hand.
“I’m very disappointed, Danny. I told you in this house we don’t steal.”
Danny slid his hands into his pockets. “It was on the floor.”
“Then you should have taken it to the lost and found. You’ll have to take it to the principal on Monday and apologize to the kid you took it from.”
I decided not to tell Ray we’d been summoned to the principal’s office. Most weeks, he didn’t work on Mondays. I could tell him then and let him have the pleasure of facing Mrs. Travis.
Ray pushed his chair back from the table. “I think you should help me clear the table and do the dishes tonight, Danny. Maybe we can assign you some regular chores and pay you an allowance. You could earn enough money to buy your own Nintendo.”
I could see Danny mulling this concept over. Ray handed him his dish, and he carried it to the sink. I decided to make myself useful by cutting the tags off Danny’s new clothes and washing them with his new sheets.
I could hear Ray’s voice murmuring to Danny and the occasional soft reply. Ray would be good for Danny. He was a rock when he needed to be, and a real softie the rest of the time. But what would I do all the hours Ray was at work? I didn’t think I could keep up with both Danny and Erica, and tomorrow I had to get my sister in hand.
Over the noise of the washing machine, I heard the phone ring. Ray hung up as I entered the kitchen. I looked at him in question.
“I have to go out.”
“You got called in?”
“No.” Ray’s face was a thundercloud. “Gumby called me. Your sister is drunk and disorderly. She’s singing at the top of her lungs at The Cat’s Meow and—” he shot a glance at Danny who averted his interested gaze “—flashing people. He said if I hurry, the owner won’t make him take her in.”
Steven Fellows, better known as Gumby, worked as a county deputy sheriff, too. His wife, the lovely and talented Briana Engle, stripped at The Cat’s Meow. The strip joint was located well outside the township of Wachobe but still a pimple on our image.
I pressed my hand against my temple, fearing what tomorrow would bring. “Erica stopped taking her medicine. If you bring her back here for the night, I’ll call Dr. Albert and schedule an emergency visit for tomorrow. Do you have to work tomorrow?”
Ray grabbed his car keys and headed for the door. “I do.”
I looked at Danny, who’d been swinging his gaze between us. “Then Danny is going to have to go with us to the appointment.”
His eyes widened.
I hated to expose him to Erica at her worst, not to mention the rest of Dr. Albert’s patients. But then, on the other hand, it might be good for Danny to get a look at the state mental facility. After all, it was a lot like a prison.
And if he didn’t stop following in his father’s footsteps pretty quick, that just might be his next home.
By the time Ray dragged Erica into the house, all the song had left her. In fact, she ran to the bathroom and all the drink left her, too. I scraped her off the bathroom floor and tucked her into our bed. Ray would have to take the couch tonight, and the kid would have to make do with a sleeping bag on the floor.
Ray lit a fire and toasted marshmallows with Danny, for whom it seemed a new experience. He torched several before he got the hang of it. Then Ray told him a few ghost stories. The kid didn’t scare easily. I left them around ten o’clock to lie down beside my sister, who snored louder than Ray. I wrapped my pillow around my head and tried to get enough sleep to face the next day.
At seven a.m. Ray left for work with a crick in his neck, shoulders hunched from sleeping on the too-short couch, a grim look on his face. He didn’t even kiss me good-bye. Danny and Erica arrived at breakfast around ten, both with sour expressions and moans.
“Coffee. Water. Aspirin.” Erica rested her head on the table. “Did you get another kid last night?”
I set a cup of coffee in front of her. I’d made it especially for her, knowing that she would want it. I never drank coffee, although I did enjoy the aroma of it. It reminded me of Ray, who could never go more than a couple hours without a cup.
I set juice and pancakes in front of Danny. “What are you talking about, Erica?”
She pointed to Danny. “There’s two of him.”
Danny rolled his eyes. “You’re a drunk.”
Erica whipped her head off the table, then put her hands to her temples, blinking rapidly. “I am not.”
“You puked last night. You’re gross.”
“You’re a thief.”
He shot her the finger.
I banged on the table. Erica moaned.
“Erica, you’re thirty-three years old. Stop arguing with the twelve-year-old. Danny, more rules. No swear fingers and no name-calling.” I set the aspirin and water in front of Erica. “Drink up. We have a noon appointment with Dr. Albert.”
“I don’t want to see him.”
“Well, he wants to see you. He’s skipping lunch just for you. So get it together, because we’re going.”
The forty-five-minute ride to Dr. Albert’s office passed in silence. I couldn’t even play the radio, because Erica said it made her head ache.
; Danny muttered “boo hoo” in the back seat after she complained. I shot him “the look” via the rearview mirror. He got the message and shut up.
Dr. Albert rented office space in a building conveniently located next to the state psychiatric center, where Erica had spent many months after her multiple suicide attempts. As we pulled into the parking lot, the shadow of “the tower,” the nickname for the fourth floor where she’d resided, fell over the car. She slumped in her seat. “I’m not going in.”
I opened my mouth to argue, but Danny got his word out first. “Chicken.”
Erica whirled to face him. “I am not chicken. I hate chicken.”
“Chicken.”
As their battle raged on, I got out of the car, walked around to Erica’s door, and whipped it open. I grabbed her arm and yanked her out of the car.
“Ow.”
I kept hold of her arm and marched her toward Dr. Albert’s office. “You’re arguing with the twelve-year-old again.”
“I don’t like him. Can’t you give him back to foster care?”
The thought had crossed my mind more than once, but at the moment, I didn’t like my sister all that much either. I kept walking.
Dr. Albert was hot, and the minute Erica saw him, she remembered that. She straightened up and smoothed her clothes, smiling at high voltage. He gave her the same wattage in return and ushered her into his office. “Give us an hour, please, Jolene.”
I turned and realized Danny hadn’t followed us inside. I jogged out to the parking lot. He was in the car. I let out a sigh of relief and climbed into the driver’s seat.
“Thanks for riding along with us, Danny. When we get home, your furniture should be coming. And Ray has tomorrow off because it’s Thanksgiving. Maybe you guys can start painting the room in the morning.”
“Which room am I getting?”
I swallowed. “The second bedroom.”
“The one with the baby crib in it?”
Tears warmed my eyes. “Yeah. You guys will have to move all that furniture into the garage.”
“Did your baby die?”
I dug a tissue out of my purse and blew my nose. “No. We had a baby from foster care for seven months. We wanted to adopt her, but her mother changed her mind and wanted her back.”
“And now you’re sad. That’s what Ray said.”
“He did?”
“He said you were sad, but having me around would make you happy. He said not to worry if you cried, because you’d snap out of it.”
That sounded just like Ray. For years I’d soldiered on in the face of my mother’s suicide, my father’s death, and my sister’s bizarre behavior, Ray helpful by my side. But when we lost Noelle and I slumped into depression, Ray accepted two months of my misery before he sat me down. He said he’d never worried about me before when he left for work, because he knew I’d go on whether he came home or not. But now he did worry, and it was affecting his decision-making. I’d told him, “Don’t worry, I’ll snap out of it.” And I would—in time. But it needed to be my time.
“He’s right. Not to worry.” I managed a smile as I stuffed the soiled tissue back in my purse. “I’m okay now.”
Danny gave me a relieved twitch of his lips in return. “I don’t know what’s so great about babies anyway. All they do is cry and mess their diapers. They smell bad.”
“They smell really nice after a bath, trust me.” I pinched the bridge of my nose to stop the tears from returning.
“I guess.” He faced the window. Our bonding was over.
I turned on the radio and listened until it was time to retrieve Erica, trying not to think about Noelle or about Ray’s scheme to make me feel better by sticking me with this juvenile delinquent in training. But when the song “You Are So Beautiful” played, I pictured Noelle’s sweet face and almost lost it.
I locked Danny in the car while I walked into the office building, explaining it was for his protection. His expression said, “Yeah, right, lady.”
A light snow had started. I stuck my tongue out to catch one of the first snowflakes of the season before entering the office building. Maybe in my next life I would be a carefree, drifting snowflake.
Erica handed me her prescription as we stepped into the hall outside Dr. Albert’s office. “He said to get this filled on our way home. And we need to pick up my car from The Cat’s Meow. I have to work tonight.”
I put my hand on her arm to bring her to a halt. “Did you talk to Dr. Albert about your poor self-image, your drinking, and that stuff about being a receptacle?”
“Yes, Jolene.” Erica resumed walking, kicking the new fallen snow into the air. “He says my medication helps promote weight loss.”
“Really?” I read the prescription. It was for the same stuff she’d been taking for the last year, maybe a higher dosage. The fact sheet from the pharmacy said it could promote bloating. Good thing Erica never read the fact sheets.
“He also said studies have shown that women’s hymens can regenerate after months of celibacy. I’m going to be a born-again virgin.”
I stopped walking. She took a few more steps, missed me, and turned around.
We couldn’t have this conversation in front of Danny, and I didn’t want to lose the opportunity. “What are you talking about?”
“I offered to go home with one of the guys at the bar last month. We did it before, a couple years back. He passed. He said my receptacle has been used one time too many and was stretched out like a chicken that had laid too many eggs. Then nobody wanted to go home with me anymore, not even this guy who always sits around until after two a.m. talking to me. And he’s not even that good-looking.”
This must be what Ray meant when he said Erica was making a fool of herself all over town. She’d been begging men to take her home. Ugh!
I resumed walking. Erica followed.
“A guy over at The Cat’s Meow liked me. He wanted to take me home, but Gumby wouldn’t let him.” She twirled her hair. “Gumby’s just jealous. He wanted to make it with me a couple months ago, but I turned him down.”
I stumbled and righted myself. Gumby got married five months ago. Was he cheating on his wife already? I shouldn’t be so surprised with his track record. But Erica was Ray’s sister-in-law. Gumby should show more deference to his comrade-in-arms.
“Dr. Albert said I could be a virgin again if I abstain for a few months. Then my receptacle will be brand new.” Erica twirled in circles across the parking lot. “He’s so smart. He might even want me then.”
I didn’t attempt to explain all her faulty logic, nor did I question the quality of Dr. Albert’s therapy. Abstaining sounded like a wonderful idea to me. At least it would keep her out of The Cat’s Meow.
We climbed into the front seat of the car. I turned over the ignition and glanced over my shoulder as I clicked the gear into reverse.
The back seat was empty.
I slammed the car into park and leapt out of the car. “Danny? Danny?”
My gaze swept the parking lot and the grounds beyond. I couldn’t spot any movement other than a plastic bag blowing with the wind.
I raced into the office building and crashed through the door to Dr. Albert’s waiting room. No sign of Danny.
I ran back outside. Erica met me at the door. “Did you find him?”
“No.”
I darted across the parking lot, threw open my car door, and wrenched my cell phone from my purse. My hands shook as I dialed Ray.
He answered on the second ring.
“He’s gone.”
“Danny?”
“Yes, yes! I left him in the car outside Dr. Albert’s office. I locked him in and told him not to open the doors for anyone. I came out with Erica and he was gone.”
My mouth felt dry. A lump formed in my throat. I’d lost another child.
“Do you think someone took him, Ray?”
“I doubt it. I’ll issue an Amber Alert anyway. What was he wearing?”
I told him.<
br />
“Okay. Stay right there. I’m on my way.”
I hit the end button and met Erica by the trunk of the car. “Ray’s coming. He doesn’t think anyone took him. Danny must have taken off by himself.”
Erica kicked a stone across the parking lot. She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye. “You didn’t tell Danny I wanted you to give him back, did you?”
____
Ten minutes later Ray arrived. He sent me into the building to knock on all the office doors while he conducted a car-by-car search of the parking lot. The psychiatric center sat a quarter-mile off the nearest artery, so he reasoned that Danny didn’t walk away. We would have spotted him.
No one in the office building had seen Danny, nor had the guard inside the psych center. I returned to the parking lot where Ray was talking on his radio.
“Erica said a car was parked next to you when you pulled in. Do you remember what kind of car it was, Darlin’?”
I looked at the spot where Erica stood, outlining a car with frantic waves of her arms. A faint car shape remained in the snow-covered parking lot. “It was a white car, Jo. I remember.”
I closed my eyes and visualized pulling into the parking spot. “A white Toyota Camry, a 1996 maybe.”
Ray announced that information over his radio.
A male voice responded, “I got a white Camry in sight. Southbound on Pinion Heights. O-o-o-h. Correction, make that stationary at the Charleston intersection. He just rear-ended a Volvo.”
“I’m on my way.” Ray leapt into his car and took off, siren blaring.
Erica looked at me. “Aren’t you going to follow him?”
We chased Ray’s sheriff’s car, exceeding the speed limit without fear of being stopped since every available officer was on Danny’s trail. I did slow down after sliding a few feet through a red light on the fresh snow.
Ray had pulled over about five miles from the psych center, joining a line of parked cars. Danny sat on the side of the road with his head between his knees. A paramedic knelt in the grass next to him, talking to him.