"Hope?" I pressed.
"Ryan told me he'd try and put a word in with someone he knew to help me with my career when we were at the Waterfront. Now you tell me he knows Caden Blockley? Don't you think that's it? They're talking? Oh, God, I—"
"Shh." I put my hand on her forearm.
"You're right. I'm overreacting and analyzing too much, but wow! My mind is spinning."
"I hope I didn't blow it for you."
"We'll see," her body deflated. "Let's go home and change."
We dressed up and began our adventure. Because of my sister's maturity and her ability to talk business lingo, we easily got into the two buildings in which she was interested. We were even escorted to the tops floors by the on-site realtor. After showing us two residences, each three thousand square feet with killer views and a price tag to match, the woman asked if we'd mind escorting ourselves to the lobby. She explained she'd just gotten a text that a couple interested in the same apartment were on their way up. We thanked her, took her card and then waited at the elevator.
The doors opened.
Two striking men stood inside the car in expensive three-piece suits. They stepped to the back to give us room.
"Ladies," one greeted.
The other stared attentively.
"Gentlemen," Jenise smiled, her eyes twinkling.
My sister is flirting! I wonder if Sean knows she flirts?
Both men were in their late twenties to early thirties, taller than six feet, dark haired, had chiseled features, brown eyes, were fit, and gave a scent that invoked carnal invitations.
"That's him," I mouthed to my sister.
"What?" she mouthed back.
"That's him," I mouthed again.
"I can't understand you," she said aloud. "What are you saying?"
"I believe Ms. Young is trying to tell you that I'm Caden Blockley." He stepped forward and extended his hand. "Pleased to meet you . . . Jenise?"
"Yes, how did you—"
"Your sister and I had an interesting meeting several weeks back," he smirked. "Isn't that right, Ms. Young?"
"It was informative, but I don't think it was especially interesting." I stared straight ahead.
"Tell me you're looking to lease an apartment here." It was as if his voice was a snake slithering at our feet. "I shall personally guarantee you the space. In fact, if you're going to be a resident here, Ms. Young, I might even co-sign on the contract if you promise to have me over on occasion."
"You designed the building and you live here?" Jenise asked, ignoring his disgusting offer. "Nice."
"Ah, a woman who studies her future," he commented. "Well done. Will you and your sister share the apartment?"
"We're just bowsin for the future." I cleared my throat, correcting my error. "Browsing, I mean." I quickly glanced at him. It was as if his eyes saw through my clothes. His gaze was firm, unwavering and held me inside of it.
"Speaking of the future, your sister tells me you're quite a brilliant woman, Jenise. Upon first impression, I'd say she's spot on."
"Oh, she did? Thanks, sis!" She nudged my shoulder.
"I look forward to reviewing your project. You're graduating next year . . . I presume you're submitting one to me? I seem to remember your sister asked me if I'd taken a look at your work."
"Yes, I certainly am. I've been developing it for two years."
"Tell him," I whispered.
She shook her head and mouthed a firm "no."
"Your sister will have plenty of time to discuss her project with me." His eyes darted back and forth as if looking over my whole face. "You look quite sophisticated today, Ms. Young, and lovely as always. Ryan shouldn't let you out on your own, someone's liable to snatch you up."
"Not likely." I wasn't amused and used a dull tone to convey my lack of interest.
He laughed a one-syllable deep laugh like Ryan's. Suddenly I was reminded of how much I loved it. Just like that, I missed the stir I felt in my belly when my lost love released the sexiest voice I'd ever heard. I missed him.
"Mitch, please meet Nicky Young and her sister, Jenise." Caden made the introduction for his friend.
"Pleasure to meet you both." Mitch shook our hands.
"Jenise, Nicky, may we offer you a ride somewhere?"
"No," I answered Caden, not looking at him.
"Join us for dinner, then?" he lifted my hand and kissed it. I pulled it away. "Mitch is single, and new to our fair city. I think I speak for both of us when I say we'd enjoy your feminine company."
"My sister has a fiancé and I have a boyfriend as you know." Well, not anymore but he doesn't know that. Or maybe he does? "No thanks."
"And the problem is . . . I assume your sister would enjoy the opportunity." He turned to Jenise. "Wouldn't you, Jenise?"
"Love to!" she gave me the evil eye, daring me to disagree.
"The three of you can enjoy dinner together," I answered. "Better yet, Sis, why don't you call Sean and he can join you?"
"Just what do you think our intentions are? I mean really, Ms. Young." From his grin it was obvious—he was toying with us and I was taking him much too seriously. Still, I couldn't relax and wasn't amused. "I'm only inviting you for dinner, not a date in my bedroom."
Oh, damn, he's completely a sexual creature. I need to turn off this faucet he's got going.
Jenise looked at me, waiting for my move.
"I'm not dressed for dinner," I offered.
"I'd be proud to escort you," he said boldly. "In fact, the restaurant I'm thinking of encourages their guests to come dressed as they are."
"Do you want to, Sis?" Please don't say yes. This was supposed to be about us. Okay, well, it could mean your career . . . still, please find another time even though there probably won't be another time, but . . . oh, damn. There's no way she can turn down an opportunity like this.
"As I said before, yes. I'd love to," she said, her determination evident.
"It's settled, then. After you ladies," he gestured when the doors opened. "My driver is out front. I know just the place."
Please don't say Gary Danko's. I'd like to think it was special and not the regular place for you and Ryan to tease and torment your dates.
I got into the limousine and Jenise purposefully sat on the other side, knowing Caden Blockley would take the seat next to me. The conversation flowed easily, and the sexual aura seemed to evaporate as we got to know one another.
We were driven to Saison, an upscale, Michelin three-star restaurant on Townsend Street in SoMa. The exterior and interior was brick. It had an open floor plan. Exposed ceilings, distressed wooden piers, grey and walnut themes, concrete floors mixed with wooden tables and chairs and a very large open kitchen had fabulous copper pots hanging everywhere. Cabinets were filled with every piece needed for a spectacular dinner service.
"Caden, welcome," a gorgeous hostess greeted him. "Four?"
"Yes, please," he loosened his tie. "Mitch, Nicky, Jenise, this is Heather."
We shook hands.
"This way," she beckoned. "Joshua would love to say hello. I'll let him know you're here."
I half expected her to ask about Ryan. To my amazement, she kept it professional.
"May I take your jacket?" Caden asked while Mitch tended to Jenise.
"Thank you," I forced myself to participate. He draped it on the back of my chair.
"St. John," he commented after looking me up and down. "You have expensive taste. Their wine list is extensive," he said to the entire table. "Mitch, you have to—"
Mitch's cell phone rang. He reached in his pocket. Looked at the screen.
"Sorry, I have to take this. Please go ahead and order drinks, this shouldn't take long. I'll have whatever you are, Caden." He excused himself and stepped outside.
We were given menus and water. Caden ordered two glasses of Smirnoff on the rocks. Jenise went with the Sommelier's suggestion of a Preston Vineyards Syrah after he'd made her promise to accompany it with a cheese plat
e. I ordered an iced tea feeling like the ugly stepchild. At the encouragement of our host, Jenise began talking about her project. He seemed interested until Mitch returned with a serious look.
"I apologize, but that was the hospital. I have to go."
"They've made a decision?" Caden asked.
"It seems I have the job and a surgery on my first night." The way Mitch sighed seemed to indicate he was in for quite a challenge. "I've applied for the chief surgeon of the neurology department at UCSF and have been notified of my acceptance earlier than expected. I'm sorry Jenise. Nicky. I'd love to have another evening where we can all get together with . . . Sean was it?" He then turned to me. "Of course Caden has told me who your special man is. I love baseball. Maybe we can all catch a game together and enjoy a hot dog instead of caviar."
I like him.
We stood to shake his hand.
"Unfortunately," Caden grabbed his jacket and shrugged it on. "I'm his ride and that means I'll need to cut my evening short as well. What a shame." His hooded eyes conveyed all that I didn't want to know. "Dinner is on me, of course. Order what you like. Ms. Young, I look forward to our next rendezvous. Don't be a stranger. Nice to meet you Jenise. When you're both ready, call this number. He handed me a card. My driver will take you home."
"This is too much," I protested. "We can—"
"It's been brought to my attention that you're not a woman who accepts gifts lightly or easily." He knew too much. Obviously Ryan had filled him in about me. "Please don't worry. Enjoy yourself. I mean nothing by it."
I hesitated.
"I'll call Ryan for you and let him know." He took out his phone. "Put your mind at ease."
"No!" I jumped. "No, it's okay."
"All right, then," he tilted his head, knowing from my response that something wasn't right. "Have a good evening."
"God, Nicky!" Jenise said after they left. "You and your damn surprises!"
"What do you mean?"
"The people you've met through Ryan," she said. "Who's next? The fuckin' President?"
"I'm not even hungry," I laughed half-heartedly.
"We have to get something," she interjected. "First, it would be rude, but second . . . I mean this is Saison! We'll never be back here."
"Yes you will. You'll be working for him, after all."
"Yeah," she blushed, perhaps imagining her future.
"Look at this stuff . . . caviar, pigeon, fish, words I've never heard of . . ." I wrinkled my nose. "Have you ever had any of this?"
"Have one of their salads, then," she suggested. "Personally, I'm trying some caviar and one of these items we'll never taste again. Think of it as a networking opportunity for some future client so you're not talking out your ass when they order it." She cracked up and proceeded to flirt with the waiter, asking him to interpret everything for her. By the time we were done, she had her caviar and duck. I had a few spoonfuls of soup.
"We're not really going to call his driver, right?" I begged.
"I think we can get home on our own. Besides, he might be in the car and invite you up to his place for a nightcap."
"He's awful," I told her. "I hope you were able to at least talk a little bit about your work."
"I did. And Caden Blockley is into you . . . Ms. Young."
"No, he's an ego on legs. He's like the jocks. They go with models. They flirt with big girls like me because they think it makes us feel good. His type? Size zero. Underwear, bikinis . . . that's the world I'm battling, Sis."
"Oh, you and your damn self-esteem. Your body rocks. Stop that negative self-talk. Yes, Nicky, he is definitely into you. He never stopped looking at you. As soon as we stepped into the elevator he spotted you and knew who you were. You couldn't see him looking at your body. I did and I'm telling you, he couldn't wait to catch your attention. Did you know it was him?"
"What the hell do you think I was trying to tell you?"
"Yeah," she laughed. "That's right. Sorry. I couldn't understand you. He's a sexy beast. I'll bet women all over him. Well, there's your rebound man. He's yours to try if you ask, I'd say."
"No thanks. When I went to talk with him last month? He turned heads everywhere. He was trying to flirt and he knows I'm with Ryan? That's disgusting. I'm done with that crap. I want a nerd." My eyes teared again as I realized I wouldn't tell Ryan anything about our afternoon. We were over.
"God, I wonder if Sean would let me . . . just one last time, you know?"
"Jenise! Shut up!" I slapped her arm.
"Just kidding. Kind of."
We continued the evening at Nordstrom's. We spritzed ourselves with Jadoire and Eternity, and then went into Sak's to try on the outfit in the window that Jenise had drooled over a few days earlier. We even had a personal shopper create an entire wardrobe for us. Ending the evening with some of her college friends for coffee, we got home after 2 a.m.
While the Goliaths and Ryan were on the road, my days were filled with women. I'd even made excuses to politely turn down Ethan's invitation to drive to Mendocino when he was in town. I was sick of guys. Their fragile egos and constant hunger for sex suffocated me. I had no intention of being the one to soothe them. I spent time going back and forth between Jenise, Tara, and Alex. They helped to redirect my sadness and I understood more about the subtle and not-so-subtle differences between men and women.
Being with loving, confident, assertive, and beautiful women on the inside as well as outside, taught me the life lessons of always making room in my schedule to spend time with my girlfriends. No matter what happened with Ryan, cheering for the Goliaths had brought me Tara and Alex.
Five days had passed from the moment I'd read Jesse's text.
When I called Tara the next day, she told me her tests had been inconclusive. They'd rescheduled her for another round and her mother agreed to stay over, at least until Matt returned.
Overall, I was recovering. My head was better, I didn't cry at the drop of a hat, and I had refocused. The problem? My appetite still hadn't returned. I'd only been able to stomach a few crackers each day.
Even though I'd cut Ryan out of my life, I wished it had been different between us.
His spirit seemed to reside deep inside my body.
His echo was getting louder every day.
Chapter 17
Revelations
Colleen finally called me with less than forty-eight hours until our next game. It was the first time we'd spoken since we'd received our plaque of appreciation from management and the players two weeks earlier.
"Hey stranger, what have you been up to?" she sounded overly perky as if there was a catch to her phone call.
"You're actually calling me? I thought you guys had everything handled."
We'd had a falling out. She'd taken charge of the cheer team and took for herself an award that was supposed to be shared among all of us. That same night she'd purposefully excluded me from a team get together to posture and position herself as the team leader.
On the other hand, you let her. Weren't you sulking about Ryan then, too?
"I deserve that," she said with a guarded tone. "I admit I got carried away with my ego. I don't know what came over me. I saw the chance to shine and I took it. I'm sorry."
"Uh-huh," I replied. "I never did have a problem with you taking the lead. It was being excluded that hurt."
"It wasn't right. I know it. Can we put it behind us?"
"Yes." That's what I'm doing with everyone these days.
"I'd like to hold a practice, can you come?"
"I was thinking of dropping out," I revealed. "I didn't come to the last game and you guys didn't call or seem to care. I figured it was no big deal."
"Please don't leave us," her voice was spiked with panic. "We're all friends and I want to finish the year together. Let's go out with some great memories, okay?"
"I was hoping so, too, but—"
Don't make her beg. Cheering was your idea. You're letting Ryan ruin it for you and you promised y
ourself you wouldn't let boys get in the way.
"We'll never be together again like this and I want to do it right." She sounded as if she was down. "Please come. I'm planning a new move and I need you on the bottom so I can finish with a trampoline jump."
"A trampoline?" I couldn’t help but laugh. Designing a tough routine was her obvious attempt to stand out and get the attention she craved. I couldn't deny her the opportunity. "When do you want to practice?"
"How about four? We need you for this strength move, Nick."
"Oh, thanks. My big old body needs to stabilize the group, right?" I was only half joking. I tried to bring levity as a stepping-stone to our conversation.
"Well, you are the strongest," she laughed meekly. "Your boobs and ass will give us all a cushion if we fall."
"Ha-ha, Colleen."
"Just kidding," she snickered. "Sort of."
"I wouldn't wish my body on my worst enemy. It's trouble, trouble, trouble."
"Oh sure, because then someone else would get Ethan or Jerry."
"No, I'm done with boys," I replied sternly. "Where do you want me to meet you?"
"The high school gym. We can go out for a bite to eat after practice and talk about you being done with boys. But, come on. No woman can really be done with them, can they?"
I couldn't resist her giggle. Our fragile relationship rebooted—just like the stop and start of others I'd made during my life and the ones I'd observed in my family. The bonds that seemed unbreakable when we were little girls were now delicately held together with bits of compromise and kindness.
Sometimes, just moving on rather than talking through a tough issue was the best option.
I decided to do exactly that.
Our practice brought back some feelings of "normalcy." Afterwards, Colleen and I took off for a nearby diner to grab a bite to eat. It was nice to hang out with her as a friend. I still couldn’t bring myself to eat the hamburger I’d ordered for dinner. It sat in front of me, untouched, as I talked through some of what had been going on in my life.
"I knew it!" For a change Colleen had listened intently. The look on her face was obvious—shock. "I knew even last year Tilton was infatuated with you. I told you, didn't I? I told you! How's the sex?"
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