I twist on my feet slowly, almost leisurely and begin a slow, careful crawl back down the very same hallway. From behind me, I can hear the steel door swinging shut. And with the closing of that door, it’s like my fate has now been sealed for me. This is the point of no return. This is the point where I’m about to go boom along with everything still inside this building.
I’ve managed to save Zach and Zane, which was the impetus for my visit here today. I was willing to negotiate the fact in my mind that there was going to be collateral damage, but what if there doesn’t have to be?
I reach down and tear my heels off my feet and throw them against the floor before racing forward as fast as I can. The water beneath me is even colder against my bare skin as I charge forward, water clipping up the sides of my legs. I rush back into the room I had left my father in to find him still lying on the floor.
His eyes shift to me as he groans out in pain and his chest heaves. He somehow manages to force out a chaotic chuckle from his throat as I drop down to drag his body backwards and towards a neighboring door.
I reach behind me, out of breath and most definitely almost out of time, and pull the door open before dragging him out into a short hallway. My eyes search furiously for an escape route but there doesn’t seem to be any clear path to an exit out of this God forsaken warehouse. Finally, my eyes settle on an elevator shaft with steel doors hanging off to the side.
With a newfound commitment and burst of energy and strength, I drag my father backwards with strained muscles. He groans out in pain and in the moment, I’m sure he’s content to just die but I’m not that far gone yet.
I don’t know why I can’t do it. I don’t know why that even after firing three bullets into his chest, I can’t commit to ridding the world of Seth Grimm. He’s done unspeakable things, but at the end of the day, he’s my father. And I just can’t fully cross that line.
Not yet at least.
I manage to drag him to the broken down elevator shaft and just as I do, my phone vibrates and dings from my pocket.
It’s time.
Out of breath, out of strength, and most certainly out of energy, I muster whatever strength I have and push his body over the edge. His mouth drops open as he drops over the ledge and descends a good twenty feet to the top of the elevator that’s perched about two floors down—two floors underground.
I spin backwards just in time to see the explosion…
A fireball rips down the short, narrow hallway.
The heat scorches my flesh.
And the blunt force of the explosion sends me hurling backwards so that my back slams against the back of the elevator shaft before I drop down onto the top of the elevator beside my father. The building above me rumbles as dust rains down upon me, and then the debris follows, landing on top of me until all I can see is pitch-black darkness and a narrow tunnel of light.
But my heart’s still beating, and so is his.
And though if we should both survive this, he just might end up doing what I couldn’t—he might just end up killing me—I can’t help but to feel the slightest bit of relief, knowing that I haven’t allowed him to turn my heart black.
CHAPTER ONE
LOLA
He’s sitting on the edge of the cliff with his feet kicked out over the ledge. In the distance is a beautiful view of this rotten city. I’m thinking twice about approaching him. Lord knows that the last time I saw him he wanted nothing to do with me and why would he?
I promised him one thing and then dragged him and his twin brother into my father’s mad world of corruption, evil, and malevolence. And though I had begun to feel something for Zach Richards, it wasn’t enough to stop me from the work that had to be done.
What he didn’t know at the time, and to this day probably, is that I brought him into the organization for one reason only—to destroy my father. That ended in a fiery explosion that should have killed both my father and I… Only it didn’t quite work out that way. It ended with me pulling the trigger and then quickly changing my mind. It ended with me saving the one person capable of destroying me.
And to this day, it’s a decision I’ve lived to regret.
I was foolish for ever believing that my father could change. The evil malevolence that runs through his veins is who he is. It’s written into the code of his DNA. There’s only one way he’ll ever change and that’s with a bullet through his head.
But I can’t be the one to do it.
And when I glance back at Zach Richards kicking his feet over the edge of the cliff with a sullen look written all over his face, I almost think that he can’t be the one to do it, either. I almost think that I can’t drag him back into this world. Especially not after what transpired just a few short months ago between his brother and my sister.
He grabs a rock from beside his leg and tosses it over the edge. It’s so quiet up here, so damn peaceful—especially contrasted against the cityscape in the distance—that it almost doesn’t feel like I’m standing in the same city I grew up in. It’s so damn quiet that I can hear the rock skipping down the jagged path of the side of the cliff.
He draws his hands beneath his knees and cradles them there as he stares out into the distance. It’s like he’s lost in the view and lost inside his own head. I can’t help but to take notice of how much different he looks than when I had seen him last.
He’s darker, more tan. His hair has grown out slightly from the buzz cut he’s always worn and he’s more distressed. There’s a darkness hanging over him like storm clouds, the likes of which we never really see out here in Los Angeles.
He grabs another rock and launches it over the edge just the same as he had done before. That’s when I take my first step towards him, mustering the courage to do what must be done.
Though it’s winter, it’s still hot. That’s southern California for you, I suppose. There’s a light, gentle breeze that blows through my hair, kicking strands out into the front of my face as I approach him from behind.
As I draw closer to the point where I’m standing just behind him, with the sun lighting my shadow so that it hangs behind me, I take notice of the way he scoffs gently and then curses under his breath.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” I say from behind him. “The view, I mean.”
He nods. “Yeah, it’s breathtaking.”
“You know a lot of people talk bad about this city.” My feet kick against the rocks on the edge of the cliff as I shift to stand beside him, but still out of his line of sight.
“You seem really passionate.” He chuckles and drops his head, seemingly completely unaware of who’s talking to him. “Care to join me?”
“Oh, I would love that.” I drop down beside him so that my jeans scratch against the rough surface beneath me—it feels nice to be in something more comfortable than a tight dress although I’m still wearing heels. I kick my feet over the edge of the cliff so that I’m now sitting right beside him. I’m counting down the seconds until he realizes that it’s me he’s talking to. I’m counting down the seconds until he loses his shit, which I’m fully expecting him to do.
His eyes shift to me and a haunted look travels over his face as he freezes. All I can do in return is give him a wild grin.
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
He swallows nervously, and then says roughly, “Lola Grimm?”
“That’s right,” I say with a gentle shake of my head. “You are seeing a ghost.” I comb one hand through my hair and shift the weight of my hair so that it hangs over one shoulder. “I bet you have a lot of questions.”
“How are you…?”
“Alive?” I cock a brow and then purse my lip before shaking my head again. “That’s a long story for another day.”
He drops his head and I’ve seen that very look before because the same look has passed over my face many times. It’s the look of defeat. It’s the look of giving up. “Are you here to kill me?”
“You mean like your brother
killed my sister?”
“Wait, what?” he stammers. “She really was related to you?”
“Her name is really Lola Grimm.” I chew into my bottom lip and grimace, not because I’m particularly upset she’s dead, but because it’s an awkward conversation to talk about my sister who my father and I deliberately hid from the world. “Or I mean, her name was Lola Grimm before your brother put a bullet through her brain.”
His throat tenses as he swallows again. “I had nothing to do with that.”
“Relax.” I drop a hand onto his muscular thigh and offer him a warm smile of sincerity. “I’m not here to hurt you.”
“Then what are you here for?” he questions and shifts his attention back out to stare into the distance where smog drowns out the views of the skyscrapers. “And how did you find me?”
“All of your questions will be answered in time.” I shake my head first and then bow it low, almost sheepishly. It’s because I’ve always carried enough pride on my shoulders to power an entire army. “There’s something I need help with.”
“Absolutely not,” he spits out and climbs to his feet in an instant. I can’t exactly blame him for being apprehensive because those were the exact words I used the first time we met. Those were the exact same words that lit a chain reaction that almost ended in both him and his brother’s untimely demise. “I’m not getting involved with this shit again.”
“It’s different now,” I grind out and then hook my gaze upwards to meet his. “I need your help.”
“Need my help with what?”
I nod, but only to myself, before also rising to my feet to join him at his side. It’s a little bit tricky climbing to my feet in heels over the rugged terrain but I manage to do so without tumbling forwards off the edge of the cliff and I chalk that up to being a momentary win.
When I’m on my feet, I take a measured step towards him and he flinches backwards.
“It’s okay, Zach.”
“Tell me why you’re here and you don’t have a lot of time.” He crosses his arms defiantly over one another and narrows his eyes on me. “And this better be good.”
I swallow a gulp as both of my hands drop to tangle nervously with each other. It’s always been my nervous tick, my tell-tell sign that I’m uncomfortable. Try as I might, it’s a habit that I just can’t break. I wet my lips and avert my gaze, still unsure of how to best broach the task at hand.
“You’re running out of time.” He shakes his head furiously before pushing past me, his arm brushing against my arm. His touch is enough to bring back so many memories, but I know right now isn’t the time to reminisce. I spin around and latch onto his arm, stealing his attention once more. His eyes travel back to meet mine and for a second, I almost lose focus and get lost in those dark emerald orbs. He scoffs under his breath, “Are you done wasting my time?”
I clear my throat and exhale sharply. These are the words that are going to haunt me for the rest of my life. These are the words that will serve as an impetus for something I can never take back. Once these words pass my lips, it means that my plans will become a reality. That will be the point of no return.
I swallow once more and muster the strength to force the words from my lips with total and utter conviction, “I need you to help me kill my father.”
He freezes in place again, a pale haunted look passing over his eyes as he realized just what I’m asking him, but more importantly, as he realizes what I’m saying… That my father is still alive.
“How the hell is he still alive?”
“Like I said,” I grit my teeth, “it’s a long story. Now are you going to help me or not?” I drop a hand to each of my hips and wait patiently for him to answer, but as the seconds pass by, I’m starting to realize that this might have been a terrible idea. Why would he ever want to help me after what I put him through? There’s more to the story—there always is—and though now is not the time to get into all the dirty details, there’s something I know will grab his interest. Something he needs to know. Something he deserves to know, but also something that will change everything. “And there’s one thing you should know before you say yes or no.”
“And what is that?”
I roll my lips over each other before staring him dead in the eyes and with a grave tone, I say to him, “Your mentor Dom is not who you think he is.”
CHAPTER TWO
ZACH
I'm not going to pretend that I have my life together. Hell, that's why I went to the edge of the cliff. It's there where I can find my safe place, where I can actually think. It's the one place in the world where I can hear my own thoughts over the loudness of the world around me. It’s a world that makes less and less sense as time goes on.
Lola being alive was only the first of many revelations. Her father also being alive is a revelation that shook me to my very core. He is a man that I have been running from for almost a year now. And that's when I thought he was dead. To now know that he is alive changes everything.
I have been afraid of a dead man's ghost; to find out that that man is alive, I'm shaken to my core. I have dealt with many bad people in my life. I have dealt with many evil people in my life. Nobody has ever gotten under my skin like Seth Grimm.
Nobody except Lola, but she has gotten under my skin in a different way. I know she's dangerous. I know that following her down the rabbit hole again is only going to lead to a dangerous situation that I'm not cut out for. It is only going to lead to more heartbreak and pain and yet, for some reason, I can't stay away from her.
On top of both her and her father being alive, the other revelation was that Dom is not the man I think he is. But he's not the man that anyone thinks he is. He's a man that has always been shrouded in mystery and secrecy, but he's always been a good man. In my eyes anyways.
She didn't go into much detail about who Dom really is, and I can't exactly trust her word. Trusting her has led me astray before and most likely it'll lead me astray again. No matter how much I want to believe her, no matter how much I want to trust her, I know I have to think with my head. I know I have to think with my right head. The head that's on my neck and not the head that's on my penis.
And that can be a difficult affair with someone like Lola standing in front of me.
I sigh heavily as I approach Zane’s front door.
It almost seems surreal to be standing on his front porch of his suburban home. For as long as I can remember, after we both returned from the war, we had lived together in shared apartments. When he moved out, it's like a part of me died. It's not that I need his companionship. It's not that I can't survive on my own without him. It's just that it's always been him and me against the world, and now he has Anna and it's like he doesn't need me anymore.
But I still need him.
He's my brother. He's my twin. He's my best friend. And right now, I feel more alone than I ever have before. Since he’s been gone, I've been trying in desperate vain to forge my own identity, and it doesn't seem like I am finding much success.
I knock on his door and swallow nervously, knowing that most likely he is not going to be receptive to the information I am bringing him. I know that he will scold me like he always does, because he was born twelve minutes before me and he believes that he is my older brother, when in fact we are twins. It's always been that way, and though I've never exactly had a problem with it, I'm not in the mood for him to talk down to me right now. I don't need an older brother; I need my partner in crime.
When he doesn't answer the door immediately, I knock again. This time harder and with more vigor than before. He finally peels the door open and peeps through the small crack in the door before he opens it just enough so that he can step out on the porch and close the door behind him. He crosses his arms over one another, as if he knows already what I'm about to say.
But there's no way he could possibly know what I'm about to say. Seeing Lola up on the cliff was something that completely blindsided me because I was lead to belie
ve she was dead. And in no part in my heart or soul did I ever think she was alive. Never did I think that her father was alive. Never did I think that I would find myself distrusting my mentor, Dom, from something someone like Lola would say to me.
But that's life, I suppose. It’s always throwing curve balls at me. It’s always trying to knock me on my ass when I'm trying to stand up straight.
Zane steps to the edge of the porch and peers out into the suburban neighborhood around us. He leans against the white railing and sweeps his eyes over to me. "What brings you to this neighborhood?"
I shrug my shoulders with apathy and pretend for even just a moment that I'm not here for the reasons I am. "What's up? Can I not just come see my brother to visit him?"
"I know you better than that." He wags his finger at me and cocks a grin. “There's something on your mind. And I'm all ears, so what's up with you?"
I shake my head gently and then stare out into that picturesque neighborhood of his. I can't imagine ever resigning myself to a life out here in the burbs. It's too quiet, and not quiet in a good way. It’s not like it is on the cliff. It's quiet in an almost malevolent way. Quiet like The Stepford Wives. “What do you want out of life, Zane?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean…" I sigh again, this time more heavily than before. I bite my bottom lip, almost to the point of drawing blood. Out of the corner of my eye, I see his gaze travel to me. And it's like he's judging me from above as I am hunched over the ledge of the rail. "I mean, is this your life now? Do you still want to be the same person you've always been?”
"I'm afraid I still don't understand what you are trying to say, which is weird because we have always known what is on the other’s mind without saying a word."
“Yeah, but I don't know if that is us anymore."
It's so weird, almost frustrating, how changes in my brother’s life can seem to affect me so much. It's as if the choices he is making are also choices that I must face too. If his identity is changing, then it's almost like mine is too. And while he might know where he stands in this world, it almost feels like he’s leaving me behind as he discovers himself.
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