Reckless Abandon

by J N Owens

  I straddle his lap pulling him into me as I grip his shirt gripped in my fist. Pushing my other hand underneath, I feel the ripple of his muscles. In one quick move, I grab the bottom of his shirt, pulling it over his head and pull back to look at his perfect form. The sight of him sends chills over me. I slowly run my hands from the top of chest down to the top of his jeans. I look into his eyes, I lick my bottom, pulling it between my teeth as I pop the button on his pants. He is looking at me like the big bad wolf looked at red riding hood. The thought of him eating me sends a jolt of electricity to my pussy causing me to rub it against him. I need him now, so I push him down onto his back. He grabs my shirt and pushes it over my head revealing my black lace bra. His eyes dilate as he takes in the sight. He runs his hands over the top of my breasts. I let out a low moan at the feeling of his hands on me. The rough of his hands on the soft of my skin is rhapsodic. He pushes his hands down inside my bra exposing my breasts. He moves his hands over the bottom and around the top of my chest, causing my nipples to pebble. The runs my nipples between his fingers, pinching them he brings his mouth up so he can run his tongue around each nipple then suck on each one. My head falls back as I let out another low moan. I’m slowly rocking my hips against him, I’m so turned on already and the feel of his hands and mouth on me is fucking electric. My body is wound so tight I feel like I may explode at the slightest touch. I hold his head tight to my breast as he works magic with his mouth.

  Suddenly, he rolls us so he is on top of me. He leans in and starts kissing me hard and slow, but sweet and passionately. The combination is maddening in the best way. His hands are in my hair. He pulls his head back so he can kiss down my throat and then licks his way back up and along my jaw to my ear. I continue to moan, letting him know how good it feels. I lean my head to the side to give him better access, my legs have wrapped around his waist as my hips buck and rub into his hard cock that is straining against his pants. I’m coming completely undone, and all I want is for every part of me to touch every part of him. I rub against him so hard like you would rub a stick to start a fire. I can’t get enough friction to ease the ache. My tits are rubbing against his chest, it’s still not enough. I bite his lips, and suck and kiss harder and harder. My tongue explores his mouth, it’s just not enough. I need more. I grab his pants and push them down his hips reaching in front finding his long hard cock. I run the length of it along my hand. He growls against my neck. He moves his hands back down to my breasts, grabbing one in each hand and squeezing. He lets out another low growl as I continue to rub his dick. He moves his mouth over one breast, kissing and sucking my nipple, swirling his tongue around it, while he pulls on the other one with his hand. I push up into him, giving him permission to keep going. It feels so good to have his hands and mouth on me. His hands are rough, I can feel the callouses from working outside, but they are also tender and touch me in just the right way.

  I pull his face up to look at him, “I’m scared. I just need you know that. I have never done this before. I mean I have had sex obviously; I mean not a lot. I’m talking about having a relationship before. Like at all. I don’t know anything about this. I want to love you, but I don’t even know what it looks like or feels like. I feel like I do, like I should and there is something inside me that says I do, but there is also something that says I shouldn’t, like it’s way too soon. But I need you, now. I need you to fuck me.” It comes as a raspy whisper.

  “Hey. We will figure this out together — you and me. I promise.” He gives me a soft kiss on the mouth, then deepens it. “And I am going to fuck you.”

  He explores my mouth, getting rougher and harder. I know I have soaked my panties at this point. I am so fucking turned on. I swear if he doesn’t fuck me soon, I may die. He starts kissing across my collarbone and makes his way down to my breast. He takes my left breast in his hand then moves to right. Kissing and sucking my nipples into his mouth as he goes. As he makes his way down my stomach, he undoes my pants and pushes them down my hips and works them all the way down my legs. His hand rubs over the warmth of my panties. I arch my back at how wonderful it feels to have someone touch me that way. He cups my pussy on top of my panties and rubs his whole hand over me. And, oh God, just that motion almost has me crying out. He pushes my panties to the side, running his finger up through the wetness in my center and back up to work my clit in circles. I arch my hips into him as he moves back over top of me while still working me with his fingers. He pushes a second finger into me.

  When I let out a moan he whispers into my ear, “Your so fucking tight and wet, I’m not going to last long. Are you ready?”

  “Yes, fuck Scott, yes!”

  I already feel so close just from his fingers. I can hear the foil from the condom wrapper, then he takes my leg behind my knee with one hand, and then in one fluid movement he slides his dick into my wet opening. It’s such a tight fit it takes him a few slow thrusts to get all the way in. Now I’m moving my hips in time with his and god it feels so good. He fills me up completely while hitting just the right spot almost sending me over the edge.

  I look up and he is staring straight at me. He takes all of me with his kisses that are so intense, like he can’t get enough of my mouth and tongue. With every kiss, his thrusts get harder and faster. He reaches down and adds his finger stroking my clit to it and that sets me off like a cannon. I can’t take anymore I call out his name while I clench my legs and arch my back. He lets go of the leg he was holding to grab hold of my hips. He uses his knees as leverage and starts fucking harder and faster. My legs wrap around his ass clenching him with my orgasm. He moves one hand up to my breast and pinches my nipple. I feel like my orgasm won’t ever end. It just goes on and on. As I push against him clench my pussy around his cock, he continues to thrust harder, then his release comes. I feel him pulse inside me. He lets out a loud moan, and a few more hard thrusts and he is done. He relaxes and rolls over. We lay there for a few minutes catching our breath. And then I start laughing. I have a problem laughing at inappropriate times. And this is one of them.

  “Do you find something amusing?” he is propped up on one arm, running his hands over my bare breasts, looking at me with a hint of humor on his face.

  “Yes, I do. Look behind you.” Behind him is a huge cow, chewing on some grass and staring straight at us. Normally, I wouldn’t find it this funny, but right now, it’s hilarious. About the time he turns around to look, it lets a loud moo. I’m done. I can’t stop it now. He joins me in recognizing the humor in it, so now we are both practically naked and laughing uncontrollably.

  We make our way back to the barn to put the tractors up. We go over to the garden and pick some vegetables for dinner. I take them inside to start cooking. I get it started and start to clean a little when the phone rings. I didn’t know people still have a home phone, but he does. He’s still outside, so I answer it without giving it a second thought.

  “Hello?” it was silent for a minute, so I said again. “Hello?”

  * * *

  “Oh, I’m so sorry, I must have the wrong number, I was trying to call Scott Oliver,” a very distinct female says.

  * * *

  “Oh you don’t have the wrong number. This is his house. He is outside. Do you want me to get him?”

  “Who is this?” the unknown female asks.

  “Finley, who is this?”

  “Sara, his girlfriend. Can I ask what you are doing in my house?”

  “Oh my God. I’m so sorry. I had no idea. I’m…um…” I drop the phone pick up my things and leave. I just leave. Since I am not an instigator and do not like conflict, I don’t ask for an explanation. I don’t question this seemingly perfect man about the person on the phone claiming to be his girlfriend. Maybe she is crazy? I have been here at this house, I have been all over this house and there is no evidence of a woman living here, other than its neat, and decorated. But something inside me is telling me to leave, so I get in my car and drive. I can see him in my rear-view
mirror chasing me, running like a mad man, screaming my name. Then he stops. He just stops. I can’t make it past the end his driveway. I can’t believe this. It’s been 5 weeks and I’m at the end of his driveway crying. I’m crying so hard I can’t see through my tears, over this stupid asshole I just met. What is wrong with me? What have turned into? When did I become this person?

  * * *

  I am sitting with tears streaming down my face in my car as he comes strolling up to my window. He just stands there, all tall and sexy and brooding with those eyes, that smile, and those arms. He just taps on the window and I roll it down a little so he can just see through it. He gives me this look like, you know the look, the one that says oh no, what happened. He opens my door and pulls me into his lap. I’m crying so hard at this point I don’t even have the energy to stop him. He just rubs my back and pushes my hair out of my face.

  “What happened?” he quietly asks.

  Between hiccups and sobs I manage to say,

  “Sara, she called. Who is she? You didn’t tell me about her. I thought you weren’t going to lie to me.”

  He just sighs.

  “No, I didn’t. Why would I? She is a friend. She has a problem. She had some problems with drugs and alcohol, so I let her stay here a while back. Then, I took her to rehab. She somehow got it in her head that we were in love and that’s why I helped her. I have told her time and time again that’s not true. I really don’t know how else to tell her. I’m sorry you had to deal with her. I never would want you to have to.”

  He is so sincere in that moment. So caring. And it’s right then, in that moment I know, I absolutely love him. I don’t want to. I have tried not to, but I do. I don’t know what it is about this minute, this exact moment in time, but something clicks inside me. I look at him and the feeling washes over me. I am absolutely in love with this man. Maybe that’s why my inner self was screaming to leave. I was scared. I was scared to get hurt. I was scared of falling and scared of my feelings not getting returned. There is nothing wrong with this man. He is perfect. Absolutely perfect.

  Once we get inside, we head for the shower. I strip down and get in under the warm water. I let it run over me soothing me, washing away the stress, the tears and the tension from the day. He climbs in and wraps his arms around me from behind. Then, he starts washing me as he runs the soapy loofah all over my body. I turn around and soap him up. There is something about washing another person in the shower that is extremely sexy to me. Having him rub me slowly, across my breasts and bare stomach, I’m immediately turned on. My nipples are hard and pressed against his chest, I can feel the warmth spread between my legs. He leans in and starts kissing me, I feel his hardness grow between us. He drops the loofah and turns me around. His hands are wrapped around me, he runs them up to my breast and squeezes. He holds on to them as he pushes into me from behind. I’m up against the tile wall as he plunges further into me. This is not sweet passionate sex. Nope, this is hard powerful, release seeking fucking. And he is getting to it. He moves one hand down to rub my clit, he uses the other hand to lift my right leg up and prop it on the shelf. That gives him better access. His mouth is kissing and sucking down my neck and shoulder. His powerful thrusts have gotten harder, pushing me into the wall harder causing my nipples to scrape against the rough tile. With each moment of pleasure increasing, we both call out. My back is arched and I’m pushing back into him making the sensation that much stronger. He is hitting the deepest depth of me. I feel like I can feel him in my throat. It’s fucking great. All the different sensations are at war in my body, but it’s a combination that is causing the energy in my body to build. I reach back and grab his hair, pulling his face down to my neck. My orgasm starts out slow, I turn my head to seek out his mouth as it builds. I grab his hand bringing it up to my breast. He cups it and squeezes while his other still works my clit. I hold on to his hand that has my breast while I drive back into him harder and harder, kissing him harder as I fall over the edge. He comes right behind me, pulling my hair he pulls out quickly and lets his release spill out over the top of my ass. We rinse ourselves off, climb out of the shower to towel each other down, and fall into bed. We lay there and look at each other for a minute. As my eyes start to shut, all I can think is how content I feel. We don’t bother putting clothes on, we don’t even cover up, we fall asleep looking at each other.

  5

  Finley

  The next week I try to make more of an effort to spend more time with Scott. After the weekend we had, I look forward to the end of the day so I can see him. Some days are just too busy and tiring and we can’t make it happen. Tonight is not one of those days, I get out to his house and he has dinner waiting. It’s so thoughtful. He is an amazing cook. It’s so late though, I’m not super hungry. All I really want to do is go to bed.

  “Are you serious? You drove out here to go to bed? I made all this food, I also had a surprise planned for later. Why did you even come out here if you just wanted to go to sleep? What kind of sense does that even make Finley? Fucking seriously. You should have just stayed home.” I was not expecting him to react that way. For me just getting to see him was enough of a reason to come out. But obviously it’s not enough for him. Now, I’m more than a little pissed off.

  “Fuck you Scott, if the only reason you want me to come out here is to fuck me, then find someone else. Find someone more convenient for you. That’s not me, and I am not going to be a fuck buddy. Do you understand?” I grab my bag and head for the door. “If you decide you want to be decent and nice and not treat me like a piece of fucking meat you can call me. I might answer. I might not. Depends on my mood.” And I walk out. I get back in my car and drive the long ass drive back to my house. Fucking asshole. I cry the whole way home.

  There are all different emotions swirling through me. I’m angry. Fuck it. I’m livid. I’ve know I am new to this whole relationship thing, but I’m pretty positive this isn’t normal. I would never treat someone that way. He has begged to spend time with me. Was it only to fuck me? Is that all he wants? If that’s the case then I don’t want this. At this point in my life I want more. I want it all. I have avoided relationships for this exact reason. I do not want to be my parents. I don’t want someone that is going to run off to someone else the minute they aren’t getting what they need or want from me. He has to understand my career comes with a lot of demands, and a lot of hours. I can’t be at his beck and call. Maybe I have completely misjudged him. I’m hurt, I feel like a fool. How could I be so stupid?

  He has texted me no less than ten times by the time I get home. I ignore them all. Wednesday, he calls and texts me all day. Ignore, ignore. On Thursday, I finally give in and answer him. He has been persistent in his apologies, and when I finally calm down, I figure I might as well let him explain. He asks me to come out to his house again, says he has a surprise and he promises to be on his best behavior, after Tuesday. At this point, I’m not sure what his best is. But I agree and head out there after work. Once again, I’m exhausted. It’s a long drive and it’s after 7 by the time I get out there. I walk through the door to find a candlelit dinner on the table. The entire table is covered with peonies, candles, and amazing food. It’s a stunning looking spread. He is standing there, hair pulled back, in nice pants and a button-down shirt. What the hell did I just walk in on? Am I in an alternate dimension? He walks over to me very determined, palms my face and plants the most passionately sweet kiss on my lips. He doesn’t take it too far, he keeps it sweet and soft, but I can still feel all his desire behind it.

  He pulls back, looking into my eyes, “Finley, I’m sorry. I was an asshole. The worst kind of asshole. The biggest asshole of all assholes. King of all assholes. Please don’t ever think that all I want from you is a booty call. I want you, all of you. I had a shit day Tuesday. I wanted to hold you, to feel you, to wrap myself in you. That’s all. I don’t know what it is about you, but you soothe me. You calm me. I’m not the best person. There are things about me
you don’t know. Things you probably won’t like, and one day, when I tell you those things, I hope you have the grace to overlook them because you love me like I love you. But for now, just know that you make me better. You make me sane. You bring me back to reality when all I want to do is escape. So, can you please forgive me for the way I acted? It’s instinct for me to get heated when I don’t get my way. It’s childish and immature, but that’s the truth of it. The other night, all I wanted was you, to have you next to me and to feel your skin on my skin and hear your heartbeat. To feel it against mine.” He leans in and kisses me again, only this time it’s more. He gives me more. I pull back from him.

  “Yes.”

  “Yes, what?”

  “Yes, I forgive you Scott. But there is one thing you need to understand. I am not this girl. I am not just any girl. I don’t do this. I don’t run after men. I don’t run after anyone. Yes, I like you. And yes, I probably love you. I told you I don’t know what love is. But I think I feel it deep down. I want to believe in you. But this shit, this bullshit you keep pulling on me. I won’t sit around and cry over you. I won’t sit around and just let you do this. You need to know right here and now, if you want to be better, if you want to do better, then do it. Be a better man. Because if you don’t, I will not be here to see it. Do you understand that? I am not a weak-willed little girl that is going to sit around and wait on you to get better, or fix yourself. I want this. I want you. But not like this. Not when every other day is you being an asshole or ignoring me. You can count me out on that. I appreciate this, I appreciate the effort. But words are shit. Actions are what means something.” And I really feel what I’m saying, but something inside me is also saying, ha yeah right. I want to be this tough, take no shit girl. But I know when he comes back with that smile, and those eyes, and all the words, I’ll forgive him. I don’t know how not to. I still am so naïve when it comes to these things, I don’t know how to do this. I’m a relationship virgin. That’s what it is. They should have some kind of relationship boot camp, that teaches stupid weak girls like me how to be strong and stand up to mean sexy men. He is just standing there staring at me. Then he nods.