by John Varley
(Of course he loves Sherlock, a factor which weighs heavily in his favor as a possible romantic partner. I don’t think I could love a man who is not a dog person. I’ll have to add up all the pluses and minuses soon.
(There is no hurry, though. The ship will be a long time getting to where it’s going.
(Signing off for now. Over to you, Sherlock.)
—Penelope Cornflower
Certified CEC Adept (TEB 97%) Translator
Level 54, Deck G, Room 1101F
Robert A. Heinlein, en route to Goldilocks
epidog
αChris and I used to live in a place called Luna. Now we live in a place called Heinlein. One day we will live in a place called Goldilocks.
I do not understand all of this. This place called Heinlein passed places called Mars and Ceres and Jupiter and Neptune. We did not pass a place called Charon. I have learned that the place called Charon was far away, and is getting farther away all the time. I would have liked to have seen Mars and Ceres and Jupiter and Neptune. I would not have wished to see Charon. I bit a human from Charon, and I have learned that Charonese humans are very bad people. They would not be happy that I bit one of them. But I was happy that I did.
The Charonese person did not move after I let him go. I believe he was dead. I do not think I killed him. I think αChris’s shooting him in the mouth probably killed him. But maybe I killed him. I do not care. He was a very bad person. αChris says I should not make a habit of biting bad people, though. I told him I would not.
I have a new job in this place called Heinlein. I am a police dog. I am called a K-9. I have always been a canine, but now I am a K-9, too. Ha-ha!
I like being a police dog. I have a badge.
This place called Heinlein is very much like the place called Luna only smaller, except that Luna was not going anywhere. Many things smell the same as Luna, but some things smell different. I am still sniffing out all the differences.
The parks are smaller. The plazas are smaller. Our apartment is smaller. I do not mind this, as long as αChris is there and there is plenty of food. There is ice cream in this place called Heinlein. How bad can it be?
I am very interested in this place called Goldilocks. I have learned that it will have very, very large parks. The parks in Goldilocks will be so big you cannot see the edges of them. This sounds to me like the parks I see in movies from the place called Old Earth. In these parks, I have seen dogs herding sheep. They were Shetland sheepdogs. I would like to do that. I have seen dogs chasing rabbits. I would like to chase a rabbit.
Miss Penelope Cornflower is here in Heinlein, too. She has met αChris, and they are spending time together. Miss Penelope Cornflower sometimes smells like she is interested in αChris. Human females do not have to be in heat to be interested. So far, αChris has not sniffed her butt.
(I only report what I hear from Sherlock, and am bound to do it faithfully and without blushing, if possible.—PC)
I have been thinking about many things. I have been thinking about this place called Heinlein, and how it is going somewhere. αChris took me to a place called the Observation Terrace. Outside the glass wall it is very dark, but there are many lights. The lights do not move. αChris says these lights are stars. αChris says that each of these stars is a place, and that there are other places around these stars. The stars look very small to be places, but αChris says they are very far away. Goldilocks is one of those places around a star. This is strange to me, but I still think about it.
Most of my pack is here in Heinlein. Two of them were killed in the big fight with the human from Charon. This made us all sad.
Lassie the collie had her litter soon after we came to Heinlein. There are one two three four five puppies. The humans said these were the first births in interstellar space. They are blind and can hardly move, but they know how to find the teat. They smell good. They smell like love. I have been thinking that I would like to make some puppies. I would love them and care for them. Wolf males help care for their puppies. I am mostly wolf, so that is how it would be. It would be good to run with them in the big parks in Goldilocks. We could chase rabbits together.
My nose has told me that somewhere in Heinlein there is a bitch in heat right now. She probably has most of the male dogs in Heinlein sniffing her butt and trying to mount her. But I am now a bold dog, and the canine leader of my pack. I think I may go find her and tell those other male dogs to back off because Sherlock is here.
Or I may just go to the park with αChris and chase balls.
JOHN VARLEY is the author of the Gaean Trilogy (Titan, Wizard, and Demon), Steel Beach, The Golden Globe, Red Thunder, Red Lightning, and Rolling Thunder. He has won both the Nebula and Hugo awards for his work. Visit his website at varley.net.
What’s next on
your reading list?
Discover your next
great read!
* * *
Get personalized book picks and up-to-date news about this author.
Sign up now.