I Need You Always

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I Need You Always Page 12

by Cynthia P. O'Neill


  Dane helped right my bikini top and then cradled my face in his hands. He kissed the edge of my nose and asked, “Did you feel anything, bella? Remember to be honest with yourself, because your body has already given me the answers I need.”

  I know my face was at a loss. “You’re wondering how I know?” I nodded.

  “When a gorgeous woman is turned on, her breasts get heavy with desire, her nipples become tight peaks; she loses some of her inhibitions, and lets her guard down. She gives into the pleasure that her body demands and one can feel the heat coming off her center, or more properly, your pussy.”

  I gasped at his description. “How did you?” I felt uncomfortable with his knowledge of my body. But, did I really have heat down there? “I admit that I felt pleasure with you touching me. I felt something down there when you bit into my nipples. But, I don’t know if there’s warmth.”

  He continued to hold me close, nibbling on the side of my neck as his hands ran down to my ass, grabbing hold of both cheeks and drawing me close to his manhood, which felt like granite at this point. “See what you do to me? Can you feel the heat radiating off my cock?”

  I thought about it for a minute and realized that the area around his privates was warm, sensual in nature. I nodded. He smiled. “I feel the same heat when I’m near your center. That means you’re getting turned on and are far from being cold. You just needed the right man to show you what you’re missing, what some lackey couldn’t.”

  Dane finally relinquished his hold on me and offered to race me to the other side. I could tell the intensity of our situation was getting overwhelming for him. The fact that he put my care and comfort above his own needs spoke volumes to me and started breaking down some of the barriers I’d built in regards to a relationship. But, I still feared sex would hurt and I didn’t want to disappoint him if my body couldn’t perform.

  We swam for a while, sometimes playing tag, where the winner got a kiss, though the loser kind of won, too. He was too good at this game and I always lost, but I couldn’t complain as long as my lips were pressed to his.

  We were in the middle of kissing when someone cleared their throat. “Sei pronto per il pranzo,nipote?” (Are you ready for lunch, nephew?)

  Dane walked us up the steps, toward a man with a gentle face, about the same age as Rosa. “Zio Dante, è stato un po ‘. E ‘ora di pranzo già? Questo è il mio collega, il mio amore, Marissa Lawson, parla perfettamente italiano. La nonna era dalla Sicilia. Così parla qualunque lingua sono più comodi con. (Uncle Dante, it’s been a while. Is it lunchtime already? This is my co-worker, my love, Marissa Lawson, she speaks fluent Italian. Her grandmother was from Sicily. So speak whatever language you are most comfortable with.)

  Dante moved forward, hand extended. I thought he’d shake my hand but kissed the back of my knuckles instead. I could hear a low growl come from Dane. Who knew he could be so possessive? “Welcome to our home, Marissa. The Prescottini family looks forward to getting to know you better. I’m Dane’s Uncle, Dante Valdiano, but please just call me Dante or Uncle.” Dante must be a native Italian. His Italian accent was heavy when speaking English.

  “The pleasure is mine. You have a beautiful place and a breathtaking vineyard. Thank you for welcoming me into your home, sir.”

  “No need for formalities here, Marissa. My wife and I live simple lives, much like our American family. We may own and create a lot, but we treasure love and friendship over everything else. Come, lunch is ready. Afterwards, we can take either the horses or the ATV’s out to view the fields.”

  I walked hand in hand up to the house with Dane. He suggested I change into some jeans and a t-shirt, wanting to ride the horses for fun later. They terrified me, but he promised I could ride with him.”

  Lunch was phenomenal! We had wine, fresh bread to dip into the olive oil and spices, several kinds of olives, some antipasto platters, grilled vegetables, and chocolate gelato for dessert. The taste of the food was beyond words.

  The conversation was just as good as the food. I felt as though I’d known Rosa and Dante forever. We fell into easy conversation. They asked about my family and told me about their three sons, two of whom help with the business, while one currently attends college in America.

  The horseback ride across the vineyard was more exciting than I thought it’d be. The stallion that Dane rode was huge and easily carried both our weight. Dante and Rosa often got ahead of us, but Dane knew his way around and kept the steed to a nice trot to ensure my comfort. I tried to tell him he could pick up the pace when he leaned in, so only I could hear, “I’m in the lead with this, Marissa. You’re unfamiliar with horses and your thighs and butt might be a little sore later. If I go too fast, you’ll be hurting.” His arm held tighter around my waist, as his voice dropped. “I’d rather be the reason your thighs and ass are aching, love.” He nipped at my ear, before sitting back.

  I swallowed hard and felt myself shiver, despite the flush rising up my neck and face. Something in my stomach went ka-thunk and I felt like I was burning up with desire.

  The afternoon sped by as Dante and Rosa took the time to introduce me to their sons, who in turn, gave us a detailed tour of the vineyard and the processing areas to show each step of the wine making and olive oil pressing processes. I was truly thankful for the knowledge, seeing how it would be needed with the sales position.

  When Rosa led us back to the house, I’d offered to help her with dinner, but she insisted I was a guest and should enjoy myself. “Dane, your father called while we were out. He wants you to call him now. Plus, he insists that I have you do your workouts while you’re here.”

  I remembered the small workout room Dane had shown me earlier and thought the idea held merit. Maybe I could use their equipment and exercise to get rid of some pent up energy and tension. But, not before I called my former roommate. Since Dane was busy in another room talking with Mr. Prescott, I decided it was the perfect time to text Dawn to see if we could talk.

  Tues. 4 PM

  Hey girl. Are you awake? Can I call you?

  We were done with our classes. I knew she’d either be asleep or packing her things for her new place. The time ticked away and I almost gave up on us talking, when–

  Dawn—Tues. 10 AM

  RU okay, hon? What’s wrong? Is he being a jerk? Yes, call me!

  I pressed the speed dial and she answered on the first ring. “What gives, Marissa?” There was nothing like Dawn being straight and to the point.

  “I don’t know what to think. The traveling has been amazing, as well as the sites, the food, and the companionship.” I was nervous about what I wanted to ask, but at the same time, I needed to know what I was feeling.

  “You need to complete that sentence sweets. What do you mean by companionship?” When I didn’t answer right away, Dawn’s voice filled with concern. “Is Dane treating you okay? The last I heard he had you frustrated.” She laughed a bit, “But, I don’t know if it was sexual or just regular.”

  I started laughing. “I have to admit, it was first just annoyance, but lately he appeals to me and gets me bothered like he did on the elevator.” I didn’t’ know how to explain it other than to just spit it out. “I’m not sure what I’m feeling lately. I’m still scared of the idea of sex, but I’m feeling all kinds of weird things with Dane that I’ve never experienced before.”

  Her voice got serious. “What kind of things?”

  Damn, this was embarrassing, even talking with one of my girlfriends. “I don’t know how to explain it. He’s told me he wants me and I freaked out and had one of my nightmares for him to deal with, where he made me come clean about Tom.”

  She quickly asked, “Did he turn away from you or draw you closer? That’ll tell me what his intentions truly are.”

  I felt a little panic coming on. “He didn’t push me away, instead he held me all night, letting me sleep in his arms, hoping to keep the nightmares at bay.” I went on to add, “He’s using every excuse to steal a ki
ss, give me a hug, and get close to me.”

  “What does your mind and body say when he touches you?”

  This was embarrassing. “You know how I never felt anything with Tom, not even a small spark when we kissed. Well, with Dane it’s not a spark, but a raging inferno. . When our lips touch I feel the need to get closer. I’ve told him I’m scared and consider myself cold, but I think he’s forcing me to feel and acknowledge that I’m anything but the frigid bitch I thought I was.”

  “You need to throw out dickweed’s words. You’re one of the most caring and considerate people I know. You have a lot of love in your heart and I think Dane sees it. You need to forget about the past and let your body and heart guide you. How far has he gone? Is he trying to force you to do things you’re not ready for?” Dawns’ voice had a little hostility.

  “Oh, no. Dane knows I’m jumpy and has stated he’ll go slow and will only try to sleep with me when I’m ready to “truly submit.” His words, not mine. I think he’s a dominant because he keeps talking about the kind of relationships we’ve read about in some of the romance novels.”

  You could hear Dawn suck in a large breath of air, like I’d startled her. “Has he tried to control you like Tom did?”

  “No. He directs me on things, tells me what he wants, asks my permission, and then does them. However, he keeps telling me he wants to push my limits. I feel things, strange things that I’m not sure what they are.” I admitted.

  “You need to explain in more detail if you want me to help you Marissa.”

  “This is embarrassing, Dawn. Fine!” I gave up in frustration. “My heart rate and breathing kick up any time his skin touches mine. When he whispers in my ear or nips at my earlobe, I feel like I’m going to lose it and turn into a big puddle of goo. He managed to cop a feel of my breasts today, I won’t give details, but I swear if he’d continued I don’t know what would’ve happened. I felt myself building with tension down in my . . . you know . . . private area and, depending what he’s doing or saying, my stomach sometimes feels a ka-thunk. Why is that?”

  Dawn laughed, almost sounding relieved. “Honey, you’re experiencing lust. Have you read any of your novels lately?”

  “No. I haven’t had any time. We’ve gone from one country and meeting to the next without much down time. When we’ve had time to ourselves, we’ve been touring the sites. We’re currently at his aunt’s vineyard in Italy.”

  “Wow. I’m so jealous, but also happy for you. I think you should open up one of your novels and imagine yourself as the female character and ask yourself if that’s how you feel when Dane does something similar. I think what you’re feeling is some intense lust.”

  I sniffed a bit, feeling a little emotional. “You’re the best, Dawn. You’ve helped put things into perspective. I’m feeling something for sure, but I don’t know about desire, but we’ll see. How am I ever going to deal with you moving to Georgia?”

  You could tell she was crying, too. “We’ll manage, hon. You’re my BFF. Just focus on you and Dane and getting back here for graduation. Text me when you get back and don’t hesitate to call if you have any more questions.”

  SHE’S FEELING LUST! MY mind couldn’t process what I was hearing. I’d tried entering the room to change into some workout clothes, when I overheard Marissa talking on the phone. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but the topic sounded too enticing. I’m making her feel and she’s confused.

  My father was about ready to rip me a new one when I told him I’d slipped and told Marissa that I wanted her to carry my children. His words were, “You’re pushing too hard, too fast, son. You haven’t practiced with your workouts for several days and are losing some control.”

  I tried to argue with him, telling him how far I’d come, with helping her feel and breaking down some of her walls. But it was no use he was right, if I moved to quick I could scare her away and never gain her trust. I needed to sharpen my mind, resist temptation, and focus on reading her body and responses. “Son, if you’ve gotten her to the point you’ve stated, she’s probably feeling overwhelmed and unsure of herself. Remember what Kent and I have told you about taking it slow letting her guide you on how far to go and when. She’ll come to you when she’s ready. You need to trust me on this.”

  I stayed back in the hallway, waiting for her to hang up with Dawn. I knew I couldn’t rush in immediately, so I waited a couple minutes and heard her walking around, moving some luggage, looking for something.

  I decided to knock on the door. “Marissa, are you decent? Can I come in?”

  “Yes.”

  “Dad’s happy to hear all that we’ve accomplished on our trip. He’s asked us to bring back some wine and oil from the vineyard.” I watched as she had her e-reader out and seemed to be looking for something.

  “Are you going to read for a while?” I watched her jump and blush as I scooted next to her on the bed and tried to look at what she was reading.

  “Do you mind?” She asked, turning the reader over.

  “Sorry.” I gave her a chaste kiss on the lips and grabbed my workout clothes. “I’m going downstairs to the gym you can join me if you want.”

  She shook her head. “I’ll pass for now, maybe in a little bit.”

  I breathed a sigh of relief, knowing this would give me the time I needed to gain control and refocus my mind. I was just thankful that Rosa would let me borrow her whip. Who would’ve thought my quiet aunt would be a domme in disguise. Don’t go there, dude or you’ll never be able to focus in that room! No mental images!

  I must of lost track of time. It felt good stretching my muscles, the smell of the leather and sweat in the room, and feeling weighed down with all the thoughts running through my mind. I was still having a hard time focusing and getting control, shredding the hell out some of the practice targets in the room.

  I took a deep breath in and tried doing what I did with Kent, imagining Marissa either holding my targets or being one. I couldn’t hurt her. I wouldn’t hurt her, ever!

  My arm drew the whip back, finally feeling the connection, as I took aim at the targets again, barely making contact, but succeeding in my goal. I imagined Marissa tied to a St. Andrews Cross, gloriously naked, with her skin lightly striped with the caress of the whip, bringing a sensual pink shade to her back, while my hand lit up her ass, making her drip with need.

  My breathing kicked up and I could feel myself harden at the mere thought of her. I paused for a moment when I heard someone try opening the door. After a moment, I could hear the equipment being used in the gym and her voice. “I wonder where the heck he went? I thought he said he’d be down here.”

  I knew the room wasn’t sound proof. Rosa and Dante had only gotten into the lifestyle to spice up their marriage after their kids moved out. They didn’t have any concerns about volume control. I made quick work of putting things back in order.

  Marissa looked intoxicating in her workout wear. She had on a sports bra and a pair of workout shorts. It looked like she’d already worked out a bit with sweat glistening on her skin. I watched as she tried to work the lat pull down portion of the gym system they had. It was a bit amusing, but I needed to step in and help her before she pulled a muscle.

  She had ear buds in and didn’t hear me approach, jumping when I tapped her on the shoulder lightly. “Damn it, Dane. You scared me!”

  “Sorry, love. Have you ever used a lat pull before?”

  She looked at me confused. “A what?” I noticed her breath caught as she did a double take at what I was wearing.

  When I work out I want comfort, where I can strip to nothing in a heartbeat if needed. I wore my favorite sweats, that showcased the six pack and “V” that I’d worked so hard to sculpt. This pair was a little over used and hung low on my hips, displaying part of my tattoo. I’d gotten a check mark, which resembled more of a Nike logo than anything, to remind me to check off items I wanted to do in life. In small print next to it were a couple anagrams for live and love life.

>   “You’re about to use the machine wrong and,” I had to hold back a laugh, “You’re on backwards. Do you mind if I show you how?”

  Her face flushed at her error and she immediately got up and faced the other direction. I lifted her I-pod, to see what she was listening to and was surprised to see a similar song list. “You can turn your music off. I’ll put mine into the system and let it play in the room.” I ducked over to the music system and pulled up my favorite workout playlist and grabbed a couple items from one of the shelves that I thought I’d try.

  Her eyes went wide when she heard what was playing. “How are you playing the song I was listening to?”

  “We have very similar tastes, so I thought I’d pull up my workout playlist which happens to have this song and several others that you prefer.” I watched as she fidgeted. “Is that okay?” I had to ask, had to know where her mind was.

  She seemed to settle down, especially when I adjusted the weight and maneuvered in right behind her, so close that my chest pressed against her back. She sat up straight. “You’ve already adjusted your posture perfectly for this machine.” Both my hands came to her sides, holding them firmly. “I need you to reach up and grab hold of the bar and pull down slowly and hold for a count of three, before letting the bar return to its place and repeating.”

  I watched as she grabbed the bar. She held everything perfectly, but her hands kept slipping and she’d release the bar too quickly, causing the weight to drop.

  “I’m sorry.” She was quick to apologize.

  “No worries, darling. We just need to try something else to help you. Do you mind if I strap your hands to the machine?”

  Before I could get the words out, her head was already shaking and her body too. I eased forward, wrapping my arms around her and whispering words of encouragement. “It’s okay darling. It’s nothing like your ex. No sexual innuendo’s, unless you want them. Plus, these are break away straps. They’ll help keep your hands in place to better control the equipment. If they bother you, all you have to do is pull and your hands will be free.”

 

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