“True,” said Lute. “You sure you don’t have any idea who it was?”
Colin shook his head. “No. She didn’t say. But she did seem kind of like a goddess.” His shoulders slumped. “I’m going to be in a lot of trouble, aren’t I?”
* * *
Coeus was shaking with anger. “You have no idea what kind of effects magic like that can have on people. You’re lucky you stopped it when you did. Those women were already becoming violent. It would only have gotten worse. You could have started a civil war here in Helicon.”
Colin shrank from Coeus.
They were all in Phoebe’s and Coeus’s tent. Sawyer and Lute had brought Colin there to confess what he had done. Coeus was absolutely livid. Phoebe just seemed to find the whole situation peculiar. She kept staring at Colin and furrowing her brow.
“And that’s not all,” said Coeus. “You have violated these women’s minds and their will. That is disgusting. I must know what else you’ve done with them. Did you take physical advantage of these magic-soaked acolytes you had?”
“No,” said Colin.
Coeus raised his eyebrows. “You expect me to believe that with every woman in Helicon throwing yourself at you, you didn’t ever take any of them up on their many offers—offers which I heard them give, including my own partner here?”
“Oh dear,” Phoebe murmured, looking troubled.
“It wasn’t every woman,” said Colin.
Coeus gave him a look.
“It wasn’t,” said Colin. “It was only women I came in contact with, and I didn’t come in contact with everyone.”
“I’m so very, very embarrassed,” Phoebe said. “Colin, you must understand that I would never—”
“You just rest,” said Coeus. “You’re recovering.”
Colin flushed scarlet. “I’m sorry. I never thought it would get so out of hand.”
“You didn’t think,” said Coeus, “but the fact remains that you have violated—”
“No,” said Colin. “I didn’t so much as kiss one of them. I couldn’t.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“There were too many of them,” said Colin. “The minute I’d get close to one, another would show up. If I paid too much attention to any one of the girls, they started fighting amongst themselves, so I never got the chance. I didn’t do anything with any of them.”
Coeus considered this. He heaved a huge sigh. “Well, all right. We’ll leave it at that for now. But if I find out differently from any of the girls, then there will be harsh consequences. Forcing people against their will—even using magic—is rape, you understand that, don’t you?”
Colin’s eyes got huge.
“Yes.” Coeus glared at him. “And if you’ve done something like that, you’ll be exiled from Helicon. We don’t tolerate—”
“I didn’t. I didn’t.” Colin was desperate.
“For your sake, I hope you’re telling the truth.”
“I am.” Colin took a shaky breath. “What are you going to do to me?”
“Coeus, he was tricked,” Phoebe spoke up.
“Oh, you’re still feeling sorry for him?” said Coeus. “You have another pendant somewhere?” He started for Colin.
“No, I’m not.” Phoebe drew herself up. “I’m only saying that if he was tricked by a goddess of some kind, someone with enough power to get back into Helicon without my detecting her presence, then he was a victim of mischief as well.”
“It had to be a goddess,” said Coeus. “It sounds just like something Aphrodite would do. Has her cruelty all over it.”
“And no one’s seen her in thousands of years.” Phoebe sighed. “It could have been a fairy or an elf or some other trickster kind of character. Hell, it could have been Loki again. He’s a shape shifter, after all.”
Colin made a face. “But she was pretty. You don’t really think she was a man, do you?”
“Well,” said Coeus, “the council will determine Colin’s punishment.”
“Right.” Colin looked down at his hands. “I really am sorry. I just want it to be over.”
“As long as the pendant’s gone, and we don’t hear from this creature, whoever she was, again, then I suppose it is over,” said Phoebe. “I must say, it’s good to be thinking clearly again.”
* * *
Nora felt as if she’d been drinking very heavily for several months. She looked back on things that she did, and she felt the same sort of embarrassment she might have felt over something she did while blitzed out of her mind. She remembered doing all the things that she’d done, and she remembered that they’d seemed perfectly natural at the time. But now, she could see that they were completely ludicrous.
She and Maddie were in the dining room, eating breakfast. Nora was using her fork to chase a rolling grape around the bowl of her fruit salad. Maddie was stabbing a grapefruit with a notched spoon.
Word about Colin had spread fast. Everyone knew that he’d had some kind of magic pendant, which he’d been given by some mysterious woman in the woods. He’d also been the one to set off the fireworks. The woman was possibly a goddess and possibly Loki. Nora was hoping that Loki wasn’t around again this year. Last year, he’d posed as Mack all year long, and no one had even known. If he was hiding somewhere again, then they had to get rid of him.
But if it was Loki, she was sure there would be more mischief. As soon as she saw that things were going badly, then she’d insist they go looking for him.
“So,” said Maddie, “no hard feelings about Colin?”
Nora looked up. “Why would there be hard feelings?”
“Well, I might have said some things that I didn’t really, you know, mean.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that.” Nora managed to spear her grape. “We weren’t ourselves. Let’s just stop talking about it.”
“Yeah. Good idea.”
Nora popped the grape in her mouth. She didn’t even want to think about Colin anymore. There had to be other things to focus on, didn’t there? She felt like the magical obsession with Colin had made her forget things, important things…
So, what had she been thinking about before all of this got started?
Well, there was Sawyer, of course.
She braced herself, waiting for the pain of their breakup to hit her like a punch in the gut, knocking the breath out of her. But she was surprise to only find a dull ache left. It still hurt, but it wasn’t as fresh and horrible. She sighed. Well, that was something, anyway. Maybe the stuff with Colin hadn’t been so bad if it had helped her get through the worst of her pain over losing Sawyer.
She chewed on her lower lip.
If Sawyer didn’t want to be with her, she didn’t want him to do it. She didn’t want a boyfriend who was just going through the motions. And, besides, she cared about Sawyer. She did want him to be happy.
There had to be other things that she’d been thinking about, though. Her relationship hadn’t been the sum total of her existence.
She furrowed her brow.
“What are you thinking about?” said Maddie.
“Stuff I forgot,” said Nora. “It’s like I’ve been in a fog for months.”
“Right, I know the feeling.” Maddie took a bite of grapefruit.
And watching her friend chew, Nora remembered. “Your fight with Agler. He never said you were fat.”
Maddie swallowed. “What?”
“Yeah, you let me think that he called you fat. But he didn’t. He said you were too thin.”
Maddie set down her fork. “Well, I’m not. You heard my mother that day. She said I looked great.”
“I can’t believe that you basically broke up with him because he said you were skinny,” said Nora. “You guys need to work it out, because that’s crazy.”
“That’s not all it was about.” Maddie looked annoyed. “Why are you criticizing me about this? Why did you even bring this up?”
“I was thinking about stuff I forgot when we were under Colin’
s spell, and I remembered that I talked to Agler.”
“When?”
“He came by the visual arts enclave. It’s not important. The important thing is that you’re not eating enough.”
Maddie groaned. “Oh gods, not you too.”
Nora peered at her friend. “Did I say something bad?”
Maddie stood up from the table.
“Wait,” said Nora. “What are you doing?”
“I’m not listening to this,” said Maddie. “You don’t even know what you’re talking about. You’ve never been fat.”
Nora stood up too. “That doesn’t have anything to do with—”
“When I first started losing weight, you thought it was great.”
“I didn’t care one way or the other. You were a little on the pudgy side when I met you, but you weren’t nearly as fat as you think you were. I liked you fine back then. And so did Sawyer.”
“Agler didn’t.” Maddie pressed her lips together.
“He didn’t know you, really. Besides, back then—”
“He liked you.” Maddie’s nostrils flared. “He didn’t even glance at me until I lost weight. And then for him to act like he’s being all noble trying to save me from starving to death or whatever when he wouldn’t be with me if I gained weight—”
“You don’t even know that. I think he wants you to gain weight. I mean, face it, Maddie, if you look in the mirror, you’ve got to see it. You’ve gone too far.” Nora surveyed her friend. She realized Maddie’s face looked sunken, her cheekbones jutting out and her cheeks collapsed.
“Stop it,” said Maddie. “Stop attacking me about this. You don’t understand. No one understands.”
Nora crossed her arms over her chest. “Of course I do. Don’t you think we’ve all dealt with being different, Maddie? I grew up a muse in the mundane world. I wanted to be normal. I wanted to be like everyone else. But eventually I had to accept what I was. And Sawyer too. He’s not normal either. You keep trying to fix yourself, but there’s nothing to fix.”
Maddie shook her head. She looked close to tears. “It’s not that easy, Nora.”
“You think it’s easy for Sawyer? You think he doesn’t feel pressure just to wear boy clothes?”
“That’s not the same thing.”
Nora sighed. “When I was dating him, people thought I was weird too. I get it Maddie, I do.”
Maddie rubbed her elbows. They were bony, and Nora wondered how she hadn’t noticed it before. She supposed she’d been too caught up to pay attention to her friend. After all, things had been crazy for a long time. All last year dealing with Loki, and then Sawyer breaking up with her, and now the stuff with Colin. It was just one thing after another.
“Whatever,” said Maddie. “I can’t just start eating, you know.”
“I don’t know,” said Nora. “Of course you can.”
“No.” A tear squeezed out of Maddie’s eye. “You don’t get it at all. I can’t.” She hastily wiped at her face, and then she picked up her breakfast and fled to dump her plate in the trash.
Nora went after her. “Maddie, wait!”
But once rid of her plate, Maddie picked up her feet and took off running.
Nora went back to her own breakfast and sat down heavily. She speared a piece of melon with her fork and popped it in her mouth. She chewed. Well, that hadn’t gone well.
CHAPTER NINE
Sawyer accepted the glass of beer that Lute had brought him. The two were sitting around the fire pit in the tweens and rebels enclave, and everything was back to normal. At least as normal as it got in Helicon, that was.
The tweens were sitting together in groups, laughing and drinking as the flames danced higher in the darkening sky.
Earlier that night, the council had sentenced Colin for what he’d done to the women of Helicon. Oddly enough, the council meeting hadn’t been well attended. It seemed that most of the women who’d been affected were deeply embarrassed and wanted to forget the whole thing. The men were livid with Colin, but they also seemed to want to put the entire incident behind them. No one was really even talking about it anymore, as bizarre as it had all been.
Of course, the muses were an elastic bunch. They weren’t the kinds of people to dwell on tragedy. They liked to create and to be free and happy. They liked to celebrate and sing. There were lots of celebrations and festivals in Helicon, and not much got in the way of the muses having a good time.
Colin’s sentence had been relatively light. He’d been given the same punishment as Lute had been given. He was washing dishes in the food enclave. The general wisdom was that the experience had been a punishment in and of itself for Colin. Towards the end of it, he really had been practically a prisoner, unable to go anywhere without being surrounded by nutso women.
Colin himself wasn’t at the fire pit that night. He was keeping mostly to himself these days. Most people weren’t too fond of him. That was considered a punishment as well. Overall, Sawyer figured that Colin had gotten what he deserved, but he did feel a little sorry for the poor guy.
Not sorry enough to go seek him out and try to cheer him up, though. He was happy enough here, hanging out with Lute, sipping on a very delicious raspberry-infused wheat beer. “This beer is awesome.” He raised his glass to Lute.
Lute clinked his glass, but he shrugged. “I don’t know, it’s a little sweet.”
“I like sweet,” said Sawyer.
“Sweet’s girly,” said Lute.
Sawyer laughed. “Well, then. I guess I better pour it out.”
“Shit,” said Lute. “I didn’t mean…”
“I’m not offended.” Sawyer grinned at the other guy.
“It’s only…” Lute leaned close. “It’s hard, because on the one hand, when I’m around you, you just feel like one of my guy friends, you know? So, I say stuff like that. But then there’s this whole other dimension to us, and that throws me sometimes.”
Sawyer blushed. He was always blushing around Lute. He took another drink of his beer. “It’s fine.”
Lute cocked his head, sizing him up. Then he lifted one of his hands. Slowly, deliberately, he tucked a lock of Sawyer’s hair behind his ear.
It was an intimate gesture, and Sawyer sucked in breath. He stared at Lute.
Lute gazed back, lips parted.
Sawyer’s hand felt slippery around his beer. Maybe they were going to kiss now. Here, with all of these people who could see them. The idea of it being so public both terrified and excited him.
Lute’s finger grazed Sawyer’s ear. Gently, he traced the outline of Sawyer’s jaw.
Tingles everywhere. Sawyer swallowed.
And then he caught sight of Nora out of the corner of his eye. He jerked back.
“What?” said Lute.
Sawyer looked up at Nora, and then away.
Lute followed his gaze. “Oh.”
They were both quiet.
“Maybe you should go talk to her,” said Lute.
“I’ve tried,” said Sawyer. “I don’t think she wants to talk to me.”
Lute nudged him. “Just try again. You’re always telling me how she’ll always be important to you. I bet you’re important to her too.”
Sawyer took a deep breath. Then he nodded. “Okay.” He got up and wandered over to where Nora was standing. She was all alone, nursing a wheat beer as well.
“Oh,” she said when she saw him. “Uh, hi.”
He felt awkward. “Good beer, huh?”
She nodded. “Yeah, I like wheat beer.”
“Yeah, I know.”
They didn’t say anything. They both stared into the fire. In some ways, their closeness felt familiar and comforting. They’d spent so many nights sitting and staring into the fire together, drinking and having fun, both when they were friends and when they were in a relationship. Being close felt right. But it was also painful, because the memories of their closeness only served to emphasize how distant they were now.
“Um,” he said.
“You’re not with Maddie?”
“Maddie’s mad at me.”
“Oh no.” He made a concerned face. “Why, what’s up?”
Nora blew out a noisy breath. “Well, have you noticed how thin she is lately?”
Sawyer thought about it. “Yeah, I guess she’s been losing a lot of weight. When I measured her for the Winter Ball, there was nothing to her.”
“I think she’s probably lost weight since then.”
“How? She didn’t have any weight to lose.”
“She doesn’t eat. Agler’s worried about her. I’m worried about her. But she’s mad at both of us. She says nobody understands her.”
“Whoa.” Sawyer couldn’t believe that he hadn’t noticed this. He guessed he’d been too wrapped up in his drama with Lute to notice Maddie, and he felt bad. She was one of his best friends. “Maybe I should talk to her.”
“Yeah, someone should,” said Nora. “I think I blew it because I was kind of confrontational about it. And I think I chased her away. If you talk to her, try to be understanding, I guess. See if you can make her open up.”
“Maybe we should all talk to her,” said Sawyer. “You, me, and Agler. And we’ll do it like you said. We’ll be understanding.”
“Yeah, maybe.” She smiled at him.
He smiled back.
Then she looked down, and he realized that tears were forming in her eyes.
“Oh, no,” he said. “I didn’t mean to make you… I shouldn’t have…”
She laughed a little, tears still flowing. “It’s okay. I guess I realized this was the beginning of the way things are going to be now. You and me, I mean. And it made me sad, because I’ll miss having you as my boyfriend. But it made me glad too, because I miss having you as a friend more. And both of those things just made me cry.”
“Do you mean that?” he said. “That you miss me?”
“Of course I miss you, Sawyer.” She sniffed. “I saw you with Lute earlier. I saw the expression on your face. I never saw you make that expression before.”
The Helicon Muses Omnibus: Books 1-4 Page 99