Tempting Temptation [Mackenzie Dominants 3] (Siren Publishing Allure)

by Mimi Tulane

  Clearing her mind, she continued her summary. “The hero is smitten with her immediately but is harboring a dark secret. What that secret is and how they resolve the matter, well, you’ll just have to read the book.”

  Imani rolled her eyes. “See, you’re wrong for that.”

  Mac chuckled and nuzzled her sister’s neck. “Don’t pay her any mind, Ebony, you know your sister has had the book on preorder since day one.”

  “You mentioned in the kitchen the heroine is full figured? I have a friend that laments not enough romance books feature curvy characters. I can’t wait to tell her about your book, Ebony.”

  Rasheed’s comment pleased her and prompted Ebony to speak openly. “Thank you. It’s always good to know that there’s a reader for every writer. Your friend isn’t alone in her sentiments. In the past there weren’t very many books that featured a confident, full-figured woman as the protagonist. Maybe because book sales drive the focus of some publishers, it can be a gamble on that front, when the book content denotes an aesthetic that isn’t popular. Don’t get me started on the book covers!” The entire table murmured an acknowledgement. Book covers were not the sum total of a book’s worth but they were the first line of contact with potential readers. She ended her litany by stating, “However, being sexy and confident is a state of being, not a size. After all, we big girls like romance, too.”

  When Imani’s brow quirked, she wanted to bite her own damn tongue off. Why did she have to let that part tumbled out her mouth? She and her sister had often had numerous talks on Ebony’s insistence on making certain situations about body image, particularly Ebony’s own aversion to her size. Not to mention, here she was extolling the virtues of being confident—no matter what you look like—and she wasn’t remotely close to embodying those sentiments herself!

  “Yeah, I can relate to being judged by the way you look. People tend to think I’m shallow, or nothing more than arm candy. I think that’s why I prefer to deal with the alternative set—less judgments there.”

  Now that surprised Ebony. When Rasheed’s demeanor became speculative, she found herself rushing to interject. “But there’s nothing wrong with the way you look. Narrowed-minded people often make assumptions but I doubt seriously you’d have problems dating.” And…hadn’t she done the same prior to meeting him? Wasn’t she in fact still making comparisons? Now she really felt like a hypocrite. Rasheed was admitting to being lumped into a stereotype that he didn’t like, one she’d privately entertained about him just hours earlier. She wished the floor would open up and just swallow her!

  “Well I for one don’t like judging a book by its cover, or a person on aesthetics alone. I’ve met plenty of beautiful people on the outside who were pretty fugly on the inside.” Again his comment surprised her in a good way. Why had she assumed that she wouldn’t find any common ground with Rasheed? Clearly he was easy to talk to and of all the things to discover, he had problems with being judged based off his looks—him, the Black Adonis! Ebony realized in that instant that if there was going to be anything that turned Rasheed off about meeting her it would be her insecure demeanor. She was beginning to panic.

  “I guess I’m just more critical of myself than maybe I should be. I’ve had some pretty raunchy comments tossed my way,” Ebony quietly admitted. When he frowned she went on to explain. “Just yesterday I went to put gas in my car and this guy pulls up and rolls down the window and yells out to me, ‘Hey thickness!’ like I was supposed to be okay with that.” Now both Mac and Rasheed where frowning and for that matter Imani got that look on her face which said overprotective big-sister mode was going into effect.

  “Oh, no he did not say that to you!” She was rolling her neck and beginning to fuss, clearly indicating that Imani didn’t appreciate the jerk’s comment either. “Which gas station was this? Did you get a good look at the car, the plate number?”

  Ebony’s mouth dropped open. Imani was going to work herself up if she didn’t say something. “Mani, it’s okay, we don’t need to mount up a posse. Let’s face it, there are some guys that like full-figured women, like me, simply because of their size and others that don’t find them attractive at all—to each his own.” She stabbed at the grilled shrimp on her plate, no longer smiling. In fact she was ready to bolt from the room.

  “I find you extremely attractive and your size doesn’t have a damn thing to do with it,” Rasheed said firmly and didn’t that just stop Imani’s tirade and Ebony’s self-deprecation.

  Startled, Ebonly blinked in surprise. “You do?”

  “Yeah I do, and that fool was an idiot that doesn’t rate any more of your thoughts tonight.” He said that as if that should be the end of it.

  “Oh…” She looked down at her napkin, not sure what to make of that, partly because she’d been so wrong in her assumptions about the man. She missed the concerned expression on his face as well as the glances traded between Mac and Imani. Her panic meter had finally reached critical mass. “Excuse me, I need to use the bathroom.”

  On top of misjudging Rasheed Mackenzie, for which Ebony was inwardly berating herself, she felt she had now managed to make everyone at the table uncomfortable, ruining the thoughtful gathering they had arranged for her. She knew this night was going to be a disaster, only now she had herself to blame for the outcome.

  Ebony all but ran from the room, leaving the others to stare after her.

  Chapter Three

  “Did I say something wrong?” Rasheed wasn’t sure but it sure as hell felt like he had misspoke.

  “No, Rasheed, you didn’t. Will you both excuse me?” Imani left the table after a quick peck on the cheek to Mac.

  The minute she was out of the room, Rasheed turned to Mac. “Mac, damn, I’m twisted. Ebony is, well, she’s all that and more in my eyes but I don’t think she’s into me. Shit, I could use some advice, I really like her.” He got that Ebony was vanilla and he had absolutely no problems with that. The fact that she already knew what he was without him having to do a big “reveal” like his cousin had took a lot of the pressure off in that regard. But how could he convince her he was being sincere? Or that her being full figured was not an issue or a fetish for him? Maybe that was the deal. She assumed that his deviance would naturally extend to having a big girl fetish. Shit, why hadn’t he thought of that?

  Mac rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Cub, you need to slow your roll. Ebony, despite her stand on confidence or even her success as a writer, is insecure about her size. Even if you personally don’t see that as an issue, a woman can be sensitive about that sort of thing and you have to respect her feelings. I think if she allowed herself to get to know you, she’d realize you aren’t the player type and that you have a hell of a lot more in common with her than she knows. If you want to get with that, Cub, you’re going to have to be extremely patient.”

  Rasheed sat back and took in what his older cousin had to say. He valued both his and Jocelyn’s opinions. Mac had stepped in being more of a big brother than a cousin after his own brother Kaleel had died. That had been the worst period of time in his life. He’d been so messed up after Kaleel’s death that he’d gotten reckless, and it was pretty evident something had to give. So he’d joined the Marines, did a four year stint, and then got out. It was after that he’d been introduced into the alternative lifestyle by his former Marine buddy Jaguar. Had to be something in the Mackenzie DNA because one night over pizza, dominoes, and beer he told Mac and Jocelyn about his lifestyle choice and low and behold, Mac tells him that he, too, was a practicing Dominant and so was Jocelyn. Then Jocelyn shared her desire to open a fetish club and the rest as they say was history.

  “Mac, I just want to make a good impression on Ebony and so far I think I’m doing a lousy job.”

  “Cub, what made you think meeting someone you’re attracted to was an easy thing? You can know a person for years and still not know how to approach them. Bottom line is how committed are you to work for what you want? What lengths are you willin
g to go? What compromises if any are you willing to make?”

  Rasheed mulled Mac’s words over. “I’ll do whatever I need to. I’m not going to try to force my lifestyle on her. I just want the opportunity to get to know her in the hopes, you know, we might have something more.” Rasheed frowned. “You think me being a Dom is going to be a problem?”

  Mac shrugged. “I can’t answer that for you. I guess that’s what you’re going to have to find out. My advice however is to just be yourself. What we are, our dominance, is part and parcel of who we are but not the sum total and you know this. You are unique, Cub, because your dominance doesn’t overshadow your boyish side—if anything it’s a good mix. At times you can be a bit of an odd ball but that’s what we love about you. More importantly you are the most considerate young man I’ve ever known. You’ve overcome your own personal battles enough to recognize someone still in the midst of theirs. Try to find the common ground. The rest will come if that’s something she’s open to.”

  Rasheed took his advice to heart as he waited for the girls to return. He hoped he hadn’t scared Ebony off. He just needed a chance. He was willing to steer clear of any talk of BDSM or the club if it made her uncomfortable. Of course if she had any questions, he’d be the first to answer them, no pressure. As it stood he was the one feeling like he was out of his league. Ebony was a published author of some of the steamiest romance novels on the market. In person she was a soft spoken, sweet young woman, who was beautiful, intelligent, and sexy as hell.

  For that matter she made him want to become one of the heroes in her books. He’d give anything to help her on her journey to self-acceptance. Maybe that was his way in. Ebony might not be into Dominance or Sadomasochism but maybe he could interest her in a little role-playing. The minute the idea sparked it took root. He’d use her own words to reach her!

  “I’m not sure if I like that smile on your face, Cub, what’s doing inside your head?” Fuck, Mac could read invisible ink!

  “Oh nothing, I’m just deciding on how I’m going to ask Ebony out on a date.”

  Mac gave him a sidelong glance but didn’t press further. “Good luck, I think,” he said dryly.

  “Yeah man, thanks.” Rasheed dove back into the food on his plate. He was anxious for Imani to return with Ebony. He was determined to salvage the evening. One thing he was pretty clear on—he was going to have Ebony in his life. It was just only a matter of when.

  * * * *

  Ebony chided herself. She’d left the table in a panic, not because Rasheed had done anything wrong. On the contrary he was doing everything right and in her mind it was that “too good to be true” moment. On top of that she was filled with guilt from her earlier assumptions. It had become second nature to her to compare every handsome man she met with her ex. As wrong as that was, he’d been the only comparison she’d actually had to go on, having never had a serious relationship prior to him and certainly not one that was sexual. Unbidden she recalled her last encounter with him prior to their breakup. His scathing words still haunted her.

  “You know, Ebony, you really should think about how it looks, having you on my arm while you just let yourself go. Now your sister, on the other hand, is always together. She keeps her body right. Maybe I should have gone after her instead…”

  It hadn’t been the first time he’d compared her with her sister or any other slim-figured female within range but that had been the last straw. He had blatantly told her to her face he was with the wrong woman and that it was her sister that held his interest because she was slimmer. After he’d said that to her he had left for a business trip out of town and she packed up her belongings, left Chicago, and moved back home. Tremaine had become a constant source of her angst and try as she might, she could never please him. She regretted wasting so much time and sacrificing her own self-esteem toward a losing cause. Subsequently, she never gave a backward glance to a pretty face ever again. However, just spending this short time with Rasheed had her questioning her own convictions. Maybe he was the exception.

  Ebony heard the approaching footsteps of her sister. She wasn’t surprised. When she tapped upon the door, she unlocked it and stood back.

  “Peaches, what’s going on with you?” Imani and the rest of their family called her Peaches. She had no idea why but it stuck.

  “I don’t know, Imani, Rasheed might be just a bit too much for me.” It sounded pretty lame but that was it in a nutshell.

  “Why is that? He’s nice, charming, a fan of your work, and finds you attractive. And he ain’t bad on the eyes, honey, so tell me again why he’s too much for you? You’re a Stuart woman. He’s the lucky one!” Imani hugged her tightly.

  “You always know what to say. I don’t know, I just didn’t think he’d be that interested in me. I’m still working on getting past my weight issues,” she said glumly.

  “Listen, Peaches, you don’t see what I see. You never did. You are the creative one, you are the talented one. You sing like an angel, you make domestic divahood a national pastime! You write so vividly and with so much passion that I swear I see a movie deal coming! Peaches, why do you sell yourself short?”

  “I don’t know, Mani, when it comes to dating, especially the pretty ones, I just shy away.”

  Imani pursed her lips and propped her hands on her hips.

  “Ebony Latrice Stuart, no you did not just go there! Didn’t you hear that man say he understood what it was like to be judged based on how you look? I have news for you, sister mine, that man in there is the least shallow person I have ever met. And you know my track record! Oh sweetie, he is enthralled by you! If only you could have seen him before you arrived! You’re like a rock star in his eyes and all he wants to do is make a nice impression on you.” Ebony toed the floor. Imani cupped her sister’s chin and looked her square in the eyes. “Peaches? This wouldn’t have anything to do with Tremaine, would it?”

  The minute Imani mentioned her one time flame her face heated and her eyes began to water and too quickly she tried to deny any past connection of his mistreatment with her actions. “I’m over him,” she said flatly.

  “Over him and over his shit are two different things! I still want to kill him. How someone could be so damn superficial and degrading is beyond me. If I eva’ see his ass again, I’ma get Jocelyn and we’re going to beat the hell outta him!” Ebony sniffled.

  Tremaine had been everything to her. Sexy and well connected, she fell for his game hook, line, and sinker. He’d been the first man she’d ever been with sexually. Back then she had been several pounds lighter, thanks in part to another yo-yo fad diet. She wanted to please him and fit in to his social circles so she’d done whatever she thought would make him happy. She was just beginning to take off as a writer and it seemed that her world was headed for that “happily ever after.” Boy had she been totally wrong! He began to show his real nature when she began to put back on some of the pounds. He would publicly humiliate her on her food choices whenever they went out to eat, sometimes sending back what she’d order for salad or something she hated. He’d question her commitment to her health, calling her lazy and uncaring of her appearance. The more he picked at her the more weight she gained, often binging and eating for comfort.

  Then the ultimate hurt was when he began making love to her in the dark. His insensitive mistreatment compounded her insecurities. She put up with his abusive treatment for over a year before finally walking away a devastated mess. As a result, she’d shied away from “pretty boys” ever since. With Imani’s help she’d joined a support group, went back to exercise and eating sensibly, and with all the free time, wrote her ass off. She’d taken the painful part of her life and used it to craft the beautiful sensual stories she wrote. Unfortunately, her battle scars were beginning to show. She was comparing Rasheed to Tremaine on looks alone when in reality, they were nothing alike.

  “You’re right, sis. Rasheed and Tremaine couldn’t be more different. I am associating a traumatic time in my life wi
th the assumption that if you are a handsome man, you must be a dog. Or worse.” She looked into her sister’s concerned gaze. “I do like Rasheed. I find him easy to talk with and you’re right, he’s handsome, funny, and loves his family…” Ebony bit her lip. She and Imani had that nervous habit in common.

  “Don’t forget he’s a fan of your books. And the ladies in your books don’t give up on love. You’re trying to shut the door before it’s been fully opened Peaches,” Imani chided her sister gently. “C’mon, let’s get back to the guys before Mac comes to get us. He is not beyond asking to come in the bathroom, just so you know.”

  Ebony blinked dubiously.

  “I love my brother-in-law but I do not want him in the bathroom with me!” Imani laughed. They both did a quick check on their makeup then the pair exited the bathroom. Ebony resolved to get through the rest of the dinner and try not to be too much of a head case. And maybe if Rasheed was still interested, they’d have coffee or something.

  * * * *

  The rest of the dinner did go a lot smoother. Ebony was able to relax and laugh at some of the stories Mac and Rasheed shared. When they got on the topic of her Rodeo Series she was very animated about her choice of topic. “I’d gone to the Bill Picket Rodeo one year in Oklahoma. I’d never seen black cowboys before and it was thrilling to say the least. It made such an impression upon me. I was inspired to write about cowboy romance with multiethnic characters.” The wine she was sipping had made her mellow. She was smiling a bit more easily and held Rasheed’s gazes a little longer.

  “I was hooked after the first chapter of Still Waters. Dallas Tanner and Sylvia Lewis burned up the pages. That barn scene was like, damn!” Okay now she was blushing in earnest. Here was a man that dealt with sexy erotic scenes in his everyday life thinking her written scenes where hot.