“I don’t know? I guess he was just checking you out.”
“So who is it?”
“Remember that guy I was dancing with?” I said.
“Him?” she asked. Jalisa started laughing. “Are you kidding me?” she continued, then crinkled her nose and shook her head.
“Yeah, what’s wrong with him? He’s nice. He goes to my school. He used to live in Japan.” She shook her head again. “What? What’s wrong with him?”
“He’s gangsta, definitely not my type,” she said, “you know that. I can’t deal with all that drama.”
“No he’s not. He’s nice. He runs track, and he’s on the football team. Believe me, he definitely isn’t gangsta. He told me that he was checking you out at Freeman, too.”
“And that’s supposed to make me feel better?” she asked.
“Ew, stalker alert,” Jalisa joked and laughed.
“Since when are you a snob, Diamond,” I asked.
“Since ‘Mr. He’s-not-a-gangsta’ walked out then came back into the party stinking like beer, cigarette and joint.”
“No, he didn’t. I don’t even remember him going outside.”
“He went outside with you, Kenisha.”
“No he didn’t. Wait, I’m not talking about Ursula’s brother. I’m talking about the second guy I was dancing with. He’s tall, brown skin, has nice eyes and he’s quiet. Oh, and he can dance, too.”
“Oh, I remember him,” Jalisa said. “He had the shorts on.”
“Yeah, that’s him,” I said.
“Oh, him,” Diamond said. “Oh, he was kinda cute. I thought you were talking about that other guy. The one you went outside with. For real girl, Jalisa and I were two seconds from going out to make sure you were okay. Dude looked too gangsta.”
“For real, Kenisha, he looked like bad news. I know he’s your friend’s brother and all but…”
“Don’t worry about it. He is bad news,” I said looking away. “Anyway, the guy I’m talking about is nothing like Darien. His name is Barron and he’s really nice. He’s funny. He calls me Kenishiwa.”
“What?” they both asked.
“Yeah, it’s like a play on my name and the Japanese word for hi, Kenisha and konichiwa.”
“Real cute,” Jalisa said, sarcastically.
“It is cute. Don’t be hating,” Diamond said. “At least he has a sense of humor.”
“But Barron. His name is Barron,” Jalisa said laughing. “Ew, what kind of name is that?”
“What’s wrong with Barron? I like that name,” Diamond said.
“Whatever,” Jalisa said. I laughed. The conversation continued then veered off in all directions. We spent the next half hour talking, laughing and joking. It was like we were never mad at each other.
Afterward, I sat on my bed, opened my trigonometry book again and tried to concentrate. I started working a problem, but I guess I fell asleep ’cause I jumped when my cell rang. The shock of suddenly hearing Missy Elliott rapping startled me. I thought I upped the setting to vibrate but I guess not. I seriously have to change that ring tone back to hip-hop. I grabbed it off the desk and checked the caller ID. It was Darien’s phone number. I didn’t answer, and he didn’t leave a message. I changed the setting to vibrate, then a few seconds later it rang again. It was Cassie calling. I answered. “Hello.”
“Kenisha, you need to talk to your girl Ursula now. She’s trippin’ big time, for real.”
“What, why, what’s wrong?” I asked.
“I don’t know, I just heard that something was up, and she was about to get in big trouble.”
“Where is she?”
“I gotta go.” She hung up.
I shook my head. It was sad. Cassie definitely wasn’t the person I thought she was. She was mean-spirited and manipulative. And trusting her was questionable. But still, Ursula had never done anything. She included me and had been nice to me—even to my friends. If she was in trouble, the least I could do was find out if she was okay and if I could help.
I walked over to Cassie’s house and rang the doorbell. No one answered. I rang the bell again. “Nobody’s home.” Someone yelled from inside.
“I’m looking for Cassie,” I said. The door opened. Her younger sister told me that she wasn’t home and was probably with Darien. I wondered about that.
“Oh, right, I forgot that she was back to seeing Darien again,” I said, hoping for more information.
“They never stopped,” she snapped pointedly.
I headed down the street to Ursula’s house. I saw Li’l T. It was late, but he was still out trick-or-treating. We talked as we walked.
I got to Ursula’s house and Li’l T kept going. I rang the bell. Darien opened the door and just stood there. He didn’t say anything. I really didn’t feel like dealing with his drama, so I just ignored him.
“Where’s Ursula?” I asked. He shrugged. His eyes were all glassy, and I could tell he was high. “Not funny, Darien. Cassie said that she was in trouble. Is she home or what?”
He shrugged then stepped back. I walked inside and called out to her. She didn’t answer. I went into the living room and looked around. Their mother wasn’t home, as usual. “So where’s Ursula?” I asked again.
“I don’t know. She’s not here, I guess.” He was smiling like he knew something I didn’t. He glanced upstairs.
I could tell he was lying. I went to the stairs and called up to her, but she didn’t answer. I went up to her bedroom. I knocked on the closed door then opened it and looked inside. She wasn’t there. I was on my way back downstairs when I heard a female laughing in Darien’s bedroom. I figured it was Ursula, so I walked down the hall and went in. It was Cassie. She was lying across the bed watching TV. As soon as I walked in, she jumped up. She looked just as high as he did.
“She’s here, now gimmie my stuff, I gotta go,” she said to Darien. He tossed her a tiny Ziploc bag from the small pile on the dresser by the door. She grabbed it off the bed and left.
I saw some more baggies and the thin lines of white powder beside them. It was obvious that they had been getting high together. I also saw a gun. I didn’t need this. “Y’all are so stupid,” I said, shaking my head. Of all the things to do, getting high was the dumbest. I headed out right behind Cassie, but then all of the sudden Darien blocked the doorway. “Move Darien,” I said firmly.
“So, we hanging tonight, or what? We can party here then go to Maryland to my friend’s house.”
“No, we aren’t hanging out tonight. I already have plans tonight, so get out the way. Move! I’m not playing Darien. Move.”
“You promised my friend, Dantee, that you would go to his party and dance for him.”
“Oh, please, do you really think I’m going to some party at that house? Get real. And I didn’t promise anything. You did. So you go dance for him,” I snapped, and then tried to push by him. He grabbed my arm and yanked me back. He was high, but apparently he was still focused. The look in his eyes scared the hell out of me. I was in trouble, and getting past him was my only way out. “Look Darien, this isn’t funny. I don’t feel like playing games with you.”
“Games, oh, girl please, you the queen of games. You’re always playing games, trying to tease somebody. TB might like that tight-ass virgin shit, but I’m not down with it.”
“I never teased you,” I said. He didn’t say anything. He just looked me up and down. “Terrence is coming over tonight,” I said quickly, hoping that might make him move. It didn’t.
“You think I care about TB?”
“You should.”
“I bet his punk-ass never told you what he did to me.”
“He didn’t do anything to you,” I said.
Darien laughed. “That punk-ass bitch stabbed me.” He took off his shirt. The scar on his shoulder was there. I remembered it from before. “He damn-near punctured my lung.”
“You’re lying,” I said.
“Nah, baby,” he said, smiling again. “Why don’t
you get comfortable? Sit down, chill.”
“I told you I have to go. Terrence is…”
“Yeah, yeah, TB is coming over. I think we both know better than that. See, me and TB go back a few years. We were in juvie together.”
“What?”
“That punk-ass wannabe ain’t tell you he was in juvie?” He started laughing again.
“I know about that. Somebody killed his brother.”
“I stabbed his brother so he stabbed me.”
“Oh, shit,” I said. It all made sense. Terrence once told me that he was sent to juvenile hall for stabbing the guy who killed his little brother. Darien was that guy.
“Why don’t you take off your clothes?”
“Why don’t you drop dead?” I said, absolutely meaning it.
“See, you teasing me again. I’m tired of it. You acting like you all Goody-Two-shoes better than everybody. You ain’t better than me. See, my dad was a football player, too. I got the hook-up.” He took a step toward me. I backed up and looked around. He reached for my arm. I snatched it away. He grabbed the front of my shirt just as I moved away. He scratched me as my shirt half ripped down the front. He smiled. “That’s more like it.”
“You need to back off, Darien, before you get hurt,” I warned, hoping he’d buy it. He was much bigger than me, so there was no way I could get away without him catching me first. The only thing to do was to take him down. I thought about grabbing the gun, but instead I turned and grabbed one of his stupid trophies just as his hand touched my shoulder. I swung around fast. He obviously didn’t expect to see the gold-plated trophy turning with me. His eyes got wide just before it connected with his face.
eighteen
Speeding Bullet
“When you’re autonomous, you stand alone. The guideposts of life turn away, leaving you without direction. But that doesn’t mean you stop moving forward. You keep going as fast as you can until somehow, someway, life makes sense again.”
—MySpace.com
“Bitch!” He let go of my shoulder and then stumbled back. His face was bleeding, and the trophy broke into four pieces. Holding the side of his face, he looked at me and I knew, for real, I was through. But I swear, I wasn’t going out by myself. He started toward me again.
I reached back, grabbed another trophy and swung it. Seeing it coming, he blocked it with his arm. I heard a crack. “Bitch!” he yelled again. I dropped the second broken trophy and grabbed another one. I turned, ready. He stopped coming at me. He’d staggered back against the side wall bending down hunched over. I wasn’t about to wait around to see if he was okay. I got out of there fast. I jumped down the steps like four at a time. My shirt was flying open as I ran out the front door. My bra was showing, but I didn’t even care.
The first person I saw was Li’l T, but I didn’t stop. He called my name, but I wasn’t hearing him. He must have been running right behind me, because I heard him telling me to wait. I never ran track in school because of my asthma, but make no mistake I can run when I need to. I was at my grandmother’s house instantly. I unlocked the door. I made it. I was safe. Before I could turn the knob I felt somebody grab me from behind. “Kenisha, what’s happened?”
There was no trophy, but I swung anyway. My fist barely grazed the side of something solid. I missed. Somebody grabbed me and held tight. “Get off!” I screamed as loud as I could then swung out again. This time I hit something.
“Damn, she hit me!”
“Kenisha, chill. It’s me.”
“Did you see that? See, see, I told you, she’s crazy. Let her go. He got her man, see, told you.”
“Kenisha stop, it’s me, Terrence.”
“Get off me,” I yelled again.
“It’s me, lawn mower guy,” Terrence repeated, still holding tight. Through the muffled sounds of the struggle, I heard him. I stopped fighting and started crying.
“What happened to you? Who did this?”
I just shook my head. Breathing and talking was too hard, so I just kept shaking my head.
“Come on. Let’s go inside,” Terrence said.
We went into the living room and sat down. It was still difficult to breathe, but I was a lot calmer knowing that Terrence was with me. He called out to my grandmother, but she wasn’t home yet. “Where’s your inhaler?” he asked. I pointed to my pocketbook on the chair. “Get the medicine.” He instructed.
Li’l T grabbed my purse and started dumping everything out. I didn’t even know he was there before. He dug through and found my inhaler. He gave it to Terrence, and then Terrence gave it to me. I inhaled twice, then instantly began to feel better.
“You okay?” Li’l T asked anxiously. I nodded slowly.
“Do you want some water?” Terrence asked. I nodded again. Li’l T jumped up and quickly headed out of the living room. I heard him walking down the hall toward the kitchen.
“All right, now tell me what’s going on,” Terrence said. “What happened to your shirt? Did you get robbed or something?”
“No, I was looking for one of my friends.”
“Diamond and Jalisa are still outside?” he asked, just as Li’l T came back to living room. He handed me a mug of water. I took a sip and then a deeper swallow. The cool water eased down my throat, and I started feeling much better.
“Did you see Diamond or Jalisa tonight?” Terrence asked Li’l T. He shook his head, no.
“No, not them,” I said. “I went to find Ursula, but…”
“Ursula?” Terrence asked and then looked at Li’l T.
“You remember her. They used to call her Ula, D’s sister.”
“You went over to D’s house?” he yelled. I didn’t say anything. “He did this?”
“Yeah, man. I saw her going there before, and then I saw her running out. I ran after her, and that’s when you just saw us running up to the house.”
Terrence didn’t say anything after that. He just stood up and walked out. “Terrence wait, wait, it’s not what you think. I wasn’t hanging with Darien anymore. I was looking for Ursula, not him. He used Cassie to trick me into going over there. They told me that Ursula was in trouble,” I said following him to the front door. I knew he was pissed with me. “Terrence, wait,” I said, but he just stormed out and kept going.
“Crap.” I looked at Li’l T and rolled my eyes. “Thanks for nothing,” I said facetiously.
“What, hey, you just hit me and ain’t nobody told you to hang with D. As a matter of fact I distinctly remember telling you that you need to chill with all that. But did you listen to me? Nooo. You didn’t listen.”
“Yeah, right, whatever, bye,” I said, dismissing him. I moved out of the way then waited for him to leave, too.
“You’re just mad ’cause you know I’m right.”
“Are you leaving or what?” I asked.
“Yeah, but you ain’t had to hit me like that,” he sulked.
“I’m sorry, I thought you were—” I started then stopped, not wanting to even say his name anymore “—never mind.”
“Yeah, fine, I’m going. But you do know where he’s going don’t you?” Li’l T asked.
“Who, Terrence? Yes, back to Howard,” I said.
“Nah, he’s going over to Darien’s house,” Li’l T said, smiling as he walked past me to the porch. “He’s gonna kick D’s ass.”
“No, he’s not,” I said, then followed Li’l T out onto the porch. I looked down the street. From where I was, I could barely see Terrence. He was running down the street toward Ursula’s house. He was just about already there. “Oh, shit. Darien’s got a gun on his dresser. If Terrence gets hurt because of me…” I slammed the door then followed Li’l T running.
By the time we got there, Terrence and Darien were already outside fighting. Terrence was beating on Darien hard. All Darien could do was hold up one arm to fend him off. A few neighbors started gathering and then I heard sirens coming. Moments later a few people turned into a small crowd. People were yelling and screaming,
but everybody was cheering for Terrence.
“Kick his punk-ass, TB. He needs it,” somebody yelled.
“Yeah, kick his ass TB, like before. We got your back.”
Darien looked around. His eyes were all glassy still. His face was swollen and he cradled his arm to his side. “Oh, so y’all all think y’all want a piece of me, too. A’ight, come on. Try it,” he yelled angrily. He pulled out a knife and everybody took a step back. “You think you bad TB. That you can take me? Mess with this,” he said swinging wide. Terrence jumped back. “Come on. You think you bad,” he said, swinging again. Terrence avoided the blade a second time.
Darien circled and moved closer, somebody pushing him from behind. He swung around quickly. But that was all the distraction Terrence needed to knock him down. The knife slipped out of his hand, but before Terrence could hit him again, Sierra came out of nowhere and started kicking him. Darien was screaming by now, since each of her kicks landed on his cradled arm.
The crowd was really getting into it now. People were cheering and yelling. I looked away. I didn’t want to see it anymore.
The police got there a few minutes later. They grabbed Sierra and pushed Terrence away. Another officer grabbed Darien. His arm crumbled. If it wasn’t broken before, it was obviously broken now.
“Nah, nah, let TB kick his ass,” somebody yelled.
“Yeah, he needs a beat down, punk.”
“Y’all just jealous,” Darien yelled at the crowd.
The officer put Darien in one car and Terrence in the other. They tried to tell everybody to go home. Of course nobody was listening to them. I tried to get to the police car with Terrence in it, but they weren’t letting anyone close. By now another two police cars arrived and everybody started dispersing. But they were still talking about how Terrence beat Darien down.
While the police were distracted with the dispersing of the crowd, I got to see Terrence. He was sitting in the backseat with his head down. I called to him, but he didn’t look up or answer. I called out louder. “Come on, let’s go, let’s go. Step back,” an officer said to me.
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