“I promised you I’d walk away and I did, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t fucking hurt.”
“I know that.” He hissed, sounding just as angry as I felt, and shot to his feet. “It’s the last thing I wanted. But there are things. Things that make me fucked up and you shouldn’t have to deal with fucked up.”
“Shouldn’t I get to decide that,” I yelled and started pacing again. “I get it, you broke up a marriage and that sucks but that doesn’t make you this terrible human being.”
“He fucking died, Bailey.”
I had no idea who he was talking about.
Still, I stopped myself where I was, turned on my heel, and dropped back onto the couch where I sat quietly until he decided to join me again.
A hum of energy buzzed between us. It felt good to get a few things off my chest but clearly, he had more that needed to be said than I did. So I collected myself, making sure I sounded normal, sane and under control.
“Who?”
“That day, at Gio’s, I got an email. Well actually a dozen or more but it was one that made everything… I’m sorry if I scared you and that I hurt you.” He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple pushing against the skin. “I don’t know how much my big mouthed cousin told you but there was an assignment… ”
“Just that you broke up a marriage.”
“They’d been together twelve years. Had a kid, young, like six I think. Anyway, I did what I was supposed to do.” Sal looked everywhere except at me. I moved a little closer, dared to touch his jaw so I could force his head down and he’d have to look at me. “They got divorced, and our parents bought the company. Everything went as planned. Except I was a wreck. Of everything I’ve ever had to do that was definitely the worst.”
“I would imagine. You know—”
“Let me finish.”
I bit my lips together and nodded. If he needed to get this out, I was going to listen.
“When I found out what Trinity was buying the company for, I changed a few of the forms so they actually got twice the amount.” He rubbed a hand through his hair then slumped back into the couch. “I shouldn’t have said that. I could go to prison for falsifying purchase documents.”
“Who would I tell?”
His eyes took me in and I saw the resignation in his eyes. “I’ve sort of… kept an eye on them for the last couple of years. The email was from the PI I use to check up on them a couple of times a year. Dan, the husband was killed about six months ago. Car accident I guess. The kid was with him. Pretty badly hurt but he survived.”
I mashed my lips against each other, rubbing them back and forth.
“I never wanted to touch a married woman. Fuck, I never wanted to touch any of them. But every time I thought there was a line our parents wouldn’t cross, the crossed it. They fucking catapulted over it.” He paused for a breath then continued. “When my dad first told me what the plan was, I refused. But then he said they’d just make Gio do it instead and make my life even more of a living hell than it already was.”
Sal looked like he wanted to cry which made holding back my own tears even harder.
The backs of my eyes burned and knew if I saw any moisture in his, I’d turn into a blubbering mess. The amount of guilt this caused him was palpable. If I could feel it, I could only imagine how it weighed on his shoulders.
“Is that… is that how they got you all to stay in line? By threatening the others?”
He nodded slowly.
Those fucking pieces of shit who didn’t even deserve air let alone to be related to Sal, Gio, and Gemma. Who fucking does that?
“Gio doesn’t know that last part,” he said quietly.
“He doesn’t know you did it so he didn’t have to?”
“There are still things we haven’t talked about. I’d rather he not know.”
“Sal, I’ll never tell anyone the things you say to me. I’m a vault. I’m your vault.”
“The thing is, and I know this all makes me sound stupid and naïve, but I wanted them to get back together. Now, he’s dead and that will never happen. I ruined their lives and now it can never be fixed. And their kid has had to have multiple surgeries. That poor woman.”
That’s when it happened. It was quiet. Not a sob but he put a hand over his eyes and started to cry.
I couldn’t help myself. I slid toward him and put an arm around his shoulders as tightly as I could.
He stiffened at my touch but stayed there with his elbows on his knees.
And I let him.
Obviously, he needed to get the emotions out. I had to employ all of my strength to not let tears flow too but I did it. Finally, he sat back, wiped his eyes dry then stared at me.
“You OK?” I asked.
He nodded.
“All right then, come with me.” Pulling him to his feet, I took his hand so he’d have no choice but to follow. He needed comfort and I wanted to be the one to do the comforting.
“Bailey,” he said in protest when he realized I was taking him to my bedroom.
I gave him a gentle push onto the mattress then motioned for him to climb up. He kicked his shoes off first.
“Relax. I’m not going to try to take advantage of you.” My own shoes hit the floor just before I crawled on my hands and knees beside him then snuggled into the crook of his arm. With him on his back and me on my side facing him, I laid my head on his shoulder and my hand rested on his hard stomach. “Better?”
“You have no idea.” He dropped a kiss to the top of my head then must have remembered we didn’t do that anymore. He pulled away quickly. Of course, we didn’t lie in my bed together anymore either. Yet here we were. “Sorry.”
“I’m not. I have something to say to you but I’m not sure you’re ready to hear it.” Once again he stilled completely. Sometimes I wished I could crawl into his head and figure out what the hell was going on in there. Then I could rearrange the furniture to make things right. Basically, I wanted to Feng Shui the shit out of his brain.
“Go ahead,” he finally said.
“You sure?” I wasn’t. I had no idea if he could handle what I was about to say.
“Bailey.” He gave a sad little chuckle. “I pretty much deserve whatever you throw at me. As a matter of fact, it’d be a lot easier if you’d just kick my sorry ass out. Moving where you are was the worst idea I’ve ever had.”
“Well, I can’t kick you out. And I think it was a great idea.”
“Why is that?”
“I’ll explain in a minute.” A deep breath in did little to calm the nerves that had suddenly popped up. “It’s not all your fault.”
“What isn’t?”
“Breaking up that marriage.”
He tried to tell me that I was wrong but I wasn’t about to give him the chance.
“Sal, she was married. She’d made promises to her husband. You didn’t. Was it wrong to go in there with the sole purpose of ending their marriage? Yes. But as a woman, I can tell you, we have choices and sometimes we choose wrong.”
“But if I hadn’t been there—”
“Yeah, if you hadn’t been there maybe they’d be all sunshine and rainbows but she also might have cheated with the paperboy down the street. Do you honestly think that you or anyone else as hot as you could come in and make Bianca cheat on Gio?”
He thought long and hard before answering. “No. I suppose not.”
“So while I understand there’s a guilt there that you’re going to carry with you for the rest of your life, you can let like at least fifty percent of it go.”
His body trembled like he was crying again. I pushed up so I could see him and found that he was.
All I could think to do was wrap my arms around his neck even if it meant snaking them underneath him. I’m not sure I’d ever seen a guy cry up close. Wait, that’s not true. Gramps at Grams’ funeral. I almost couldn’t look at Gramps that day because it broke my heart completely. But in this case, I wanted nothing more than to make Sal feel b
etter.
No idea if what I decided to do was the right thing or not. All I know is it was the only thing I could think of.
Sal’s eyes were closed so he didn’t even see me coming.
When my lips pushed against his, he startled. His body jerked in surprise and his eyelids popped open. At first, he didn’t kiss me back.
There was a moment of terror when I thought I’d ruined everything. The small progress we’d made could be gone forever. But then his hand tangled into my hair and his lips parted allowing me to kiss him more completely.
Leaning back, I pulled my shirt over my head then hovered back over him to continue where I’d left off.
Sal made a noise at the back of his throat. Something between a growl and groan then he flipped me so he was above me.
“Bailey.” My name fell from his lips like a breathless prayer.
I wouldn’t allow him the chance to talk me or himself out of this. He needed something good, something to make him feel better, and I needed him.
Pulling him back down to me, he gave in completely. The rest of our clothes hit the floor one item after another.
Sal explored my body, his hands covering ground like they did it every day. Like there’d never been a time when they didn’t.
When it all almost became too much, he slid into me and I let out a full-length sigh.
I’d really missed him.
We moved together in a familiar way, lifting and sliding at the same time. He rested most of his weight on his elbows beside my head and I sort of just hung on for the ride. Sal knew exactly how to bring euphoric pleasure right up until the moment that his movements slowed.
My room was almost dark by then but not completely pitch where I couldn’t see my hand in front of my face as we laid there catching our breaths. Reaching under my pillow, I pulled out my favorite stolen shirt and let it fall down my body before easing back down into the crook of his arm.
The low chuckle that followed was another part of him I’d missed.
“You still wear that?” he asked so quietly it was like he thought anything louder would break the moment.
“As often as I can.”
We stayed there like that, quiet and snug beside each other on my bed, until we both fell asleep.
Chapter Twenty-Three
When my eyes opened, I knew it was morning by the way the light streamed in from the windows which I hadn’t shut the shades on before falling asleep next to Sal last night.
It was a harsh awakening and it was rude.
Damn sun.
I rolled over to see if Sal had woken up but found the rest of my bed empty. I was actually alone in the room.
I walked out into the living area and found that I was actually alone in the apartment. Sal had taken care of the food we left out last night then left.
I didn’t think sleeping together last night meant we were suddenly together and exclusive. That kind of result would take a lot more work than that. But even I have never just slipped out in the middle of the night without even saying goodbye. OK, there was one time in college but I didn’t even know that guy and he snored really loudly.
So many emotions ran through me that left me standing in my living room like a dork wearing a shirt I’d stolen from a man who couldn’t be bothered to spend the night with me.
Moments like this were when a girl needed her best friend.
I’d slept in later than I meant to so after getting dressed for the day and driving over to Bianca’s, Gio’s truck was already gone. Her car was there and I knew she didn’t work this morning but Gio did. Which worked out perfectly for me.
“Hey, was I expecting you?” Bianca asked when I came through the door. We didn’t do a lot of knocking even when we were kids. Now that we were grown, I knocked if I thought Gio was home.
“No, but are you busy?” I kicked my shoes off next to the door.
“Not for you.” She gave me a good looking over, head to toe, the way only a best girlfriend could do. “What happened?” She pulled me over to the couch then sat on the other end. We both swung our legs up, bent our knees so that the tips of our toes touched.
“He told me. About the email.”
Her eyes widened but she waited for more.
“And then we slept together.”
Her jaw dropped but still, she said nothing.
“Bianca?”
“Sorry. I’m just trying to decide which I want to hear about first.”
I snorted because that sounded just like her. “Well, I can’t tell you about the email. You know that. You’ll have to get it out of Gio.”
“Ugh, he won’t tell me anything about it.”
“Use your powers of persuasion.”
She giggled with me.
“Ok, then what the hell? You slept together? So are you together? What is going on?”
“No.” I dragged the word out because Bianca was losing her shit. I told her everything because I always told her everything except when I absolutely couldn’t. How it happened, how he escaped in the night and I hadn’t seen any sign of him through town after I left the apartment. “I just wanted to make him feel better.”
“Well, I bet you did that really well.” She nudged me with a toe. “Are you OK that he left?”
“Of course not. I mean I didn’t think we’d be getting married today but why the hell would he run out in the middle of the night?” Before I could get any further, we were interrupted by a knock on the door. Bianca looked at me like she wasn’t expecting anyone but hauled her little butt up to look out the side window to see who it was.
“Surprise, surprise.” She smirked over her shoulder then pulled the door open further to show Sal who was looking directly at me like he knew exactly where I was before he got there.
“Hey, I, uh, saw your car out there. Can we talk?” He made no move to enter the house.
“I need to run to the store today so… ” Bianca glanced at me while slipping some shoes on and grabbing her coat. “I’ll be back.” She didn’t wait for a reply but gave Sal a little shove so he’d be all the way in then shut the door behind her.
“Did we just chase her out of her own house?” he asked then smirked.
“Yup.” I suddenly became very thirsty.
Sal followed me to the kitchen so I could get a drink. He leaned on the end of the countertop on his forearms. Instead of taking one of the stools, I hopped up onto the island right next to him. For my short stature, it was quite the hop.
“What’d you want to talk about?” I swung my legs like I did when I was a kid as I looked for any signs of danger from him. Not the physical kind but the danger that another heartbreak was coming.
Instead, I just saw his beautiful self. Forearm muscled straining against the weight of him leaning against them. Dark hair, gentle dark eyes gave away nothing.
Sal’s gaze fell from my face then stopped on my shoulder just under my neck. Oops, my shirt must have fallen to the side just enough for him to see the edge of the evidence of our activities the night before. He slipped a finger under the collar of my shirt and pulled it open wider.
“What is that?”
I could see him try to keep the smile from forming on his lips. He’d been so lost in what we were doing in my bed that he left a big hickey near my collarbone. Jerk.
“Hey, it was there when I woke up… alone.”
His hands scraped through his hair when his head dropped.
“You should feel pretty lucky though,” I said to keep talking.
His head cocked back up giving me a sidelong look.
“I don’t let just anyone mark me.”
“Let?”
“I could’ve stopped you. Didn’t want to.” I shrugged him off. “You left,” I said quietly because someone had to get this party started.
“Yeah.”
My eyebrows shot up letting him know that wasn’t going to be good enough.
“I used you to feel better,” he said like it was some kind of con
fession. “That was a dick move. So no matter how much I wanted to spend the night with you in my arms, I left hoping you wouldn’t be mad at me.”
I burst into a loud laugh.
“And you’re laughing. You are so confusing.”
“I’m not confusing. You’re just too wrapped up in your guilt to pay attention. Sal, who kissed who first?” We both knew the answer so I didn’t wait. “So shut up about it already.” That got that low chuckle to come up from hiding deep in his chest.
Sal moved over in front of me, pushing my knees apart to wedge his body between them, his hands grasping my hips.
“I’m supposed to be working.” He said it more to himself than to me but instead of leaving he moved closer. “There is something about you, Bailey.” His lips touched my chest right below my throat then dropped a trail of kisses over to the hickey he’d left last night. His tongue flicked out licking it before placing another opened mouthed kiss there and sucking with the lightest amount of pressure.
My insides went completely liquid. When he pulled back I knew something on his mind made him do it.
“Bailey, we didn’t use a condom last night. I’m sorry. I got caught up.”
“Don’t worry about it. There won’t be any bambinos running around.” Because that was something I was absolutely not ready for I’d been on the pill for years. Took it every day like clockwork although usually still used condoms. Can never be too careful. “And no matter what you think I won’t be giving you anything that burns or oozes.”
He shook his head at me. “Here I was thinking you’d be worried I’d give you something that burns or oozes.”
I tried to brush it off but he wouldn’t let me.
“No. You need to hear this. Safe sex was mandatory for us. We never and I do mean never went without a condom and we were tested for shit after every assignment because if something happened to us, they’d be shit out of luck.”
“What about not during an assignment?” He’d mentioned one girl that he liked but said it didn’t go anywhere because of his job. Ever since I found out they’d been trained how to seduce people, I’d wondered if there’d been more than one.
“Uh, Bailey, I didn’t do anything outside of work until you. I’m sure that doesn’t surprise you. I don’t think Gio did very often either. Could you imagine? I can just barely get out of my own head when I’m with you, and I love you, so being with someone else would’ve been impossible.”
Love by the Mile (Harbor Point Book 2) Page 21