by Shaun Ryder
When you get on that celebrity treadmill you do have to deal with some right goons. I generally find it’s the ones who are C-list or Z-list but are deluded and think they’re A-list who are the worst. You get some geezer from some shitty soap opera behaving like Robert De Niro.
The jungle did make a big difference to my profile and I get recognized on the street more than I did before, especially with the younger and older generations, because that’s the demographic of the show. Before the jungle, I wouldn’t necessarily get recognized walking past a bunch of schoolgirls in the street, but I do now. I get little lads running up saying, ‘Did it hurt when the snake bit you, Shaun?’ I also get stopped by grans and grandads, respectable old couples, to tell me they thought I was great on the show.
I’m still doing more TV, but I’m wary about keeping a balance with the music. I’m a musician first and foremost, not a generic celebrity. So me and Warren, spend half our time turning down offers of TV shows and appearances. He’s pretty good at sifting through all the requests we get, so I probably don’t even hear about some of the weirder ones.
Back in the day the Mondays and Black Grape tours were pretty messy affairs, as you can imagine, but we’ve got a really tight operation when we go on the road now. I’ve had the same band for a few years – Johnny on guitar, Mikey on bass, Dan on keyboards and Our Paul’s son Jake on drums. They’re all quite young lads, but they’re good musicians rather than just garbageheads who are in it for the partying. Julie sings backing vocals and Tonn Piper comes in to sing Kermit’s parts if we do any Black Grape numbers. Warren has installed Anthony Tang as tour manager, and they make sure it remains a tight operation. It’s the only way I could do it now. I couldn’t go on tour for weeks on end with a bus full of hangers on.
You’ve got to have a tough skin in this game, when all sorts are written about you in the papers and everyone has made their own mind up about you, from what they’ve perceived from some caricature of who you really are. I’m in a much stronger, more secure place emotionally now. I’m with someone I’m absolutely in love with, my wife Joanne, who will be there no matter what. I live a different, more relaxed life now. I get up with my two little girls in the morning and throw them in the swimming pool and have a bit of a splash about with them. If I’m not working, I’m happy just staying in and chilling out with the family most nights. I watch a lot of films and documentaries on things like the Discovery Channel.
Hopefully me and Our Paul are moving in the right direction, too. He lives in Los Angeles now and I saw him recently at my Uncle Tom’s funeral and, though we didn’t sit down and chat, we nodded at each other and said, ‘Y’all right?’, which is progress for us.
I wish I could see more of Jael and Coco, but it’s difficult as one lives in New York and the other lives in Majorca.
I’m not ashamed of anything that’s happened in my past, but there are parts of it I’d rather not celebrate. I don’t have any real regrets, though. I wanted to be in a band, make good music, see the world and avoid getting a proper job. I did all four and had a fucking ball doing it. It was a rollercoaster ride, but that’s what life has always been like for me – a few years of pure double-good times, followed by a few years of pure hard times. A cycle of ecstasy and desperation. Hopefully I’ve broken that cycle now. I’m not my own worst enemy any more. I’m not running from anything or using heroin to mask any pain. I know who I am, and I’m still pretty much the same kid I was at fifteen; I’ve just chilled out and grown up. I don’t have a chip on my shoulder, and I don’t really bear grudges.
And remember that the Shaun Ryder in the public eye is a caricature. He always was. I just played up to that image for a long time. When it came to sex, drugs and rock ’n’ roll, the drugs came first a lot of the time. But the sex and rock ’n’ roll were right up there. I did take all those drugs, and had a lot of sex, but we also made some great records. I’ve never been shy of acting up, especially in my twenties and thirties. But once you get into your forties, you need to grow up. There’s nothing wrong with having a pint and getting off your shed now and again when you’re younger. But if you’re acting the same as you were when you were twenty when you’re reaching fifty, there’s something a bit sad about you. I still get people coming up to me in Asda or TK Maxx offering me a line. Sometimes I’ll just laugh, sometimes it winds me up – it just depends what mood I’m in. If people can’t see more to me than that caricature, then the joke’s on them. I might be poorly educated in an academic sense, but I’m sharper and more astute than most people I meet, and if I was half as thick as some journalists or 24 Hour Party People made me appear, I wouldn’t get out of bed in the morning.
Like I said at the beginning of the book, people still come up to me and say, ‘Do you feel lucky that you’re still alive?’ No, I don’t. I’m glad I came out the other side, but I never saw it as life-threatening. If you think you’re going to die, you will, and if you think you’re going to live, you’ll live. I just realized that breaking out of that lifestyle and the cycle I was in was going to be the difference between having a shit life and a good life. I’ve had the best times of my life on drugs and I’ve had the worst times of my life on drugs. When the band was starting to take off, the Haçienda was at its peak and we were running it from our little corner, there was nowhere I would rather have been in the world. When I was living in an unfurnished house in Burnley, on my arse, doing smack, I would rather have been anywhere else in the world.
But I never thought I was going to die, and I certainly don’t now.
I’ve always lived for the moment, not the memories. I’m not sure exactly how I got out the other side. It took me a while, and I don’t remember half of it. But I knew I would get here eventually.
I feel pretty lucky. I feel all right. In fact, I feel better than I have for years.
I feel alive.
On holiday on the beach in Blackpool, aged about eighteen months.
Nana Carroll, me and Our Paul. This was taken in the photo booth at Lewis’s in Manchester.
My first-birthday party at home in Little Hulton. My cousins the Carrolls were all in attendance.
My first-birthday party at home in Little Hulton. My cousins the Carrolls were all in attendance.
Me, Our Paul and my dad Derek and mam Linda (in next photograph) in our chippy on Harper Green Road in Farnworth, 1972.
We were one of the first round our way to serve curry sauce.
One of my first musical moments – me with my Beatles kid’s guitar. It had John, Paul, George and Ringo’s names on it.
Me and Our Paul on my trike outside our house at Canterbury Close, 1965.
Me and Our Paul have a shoot-out in Nana Carroll’s bungalow, Christmas 1970.
Two school photographs of me and Our Paul from St Mark’s primary school, late 60s/early 70s.
Me and Our Paul on holiday in Jersey with our grandparents, Bill and Annie Carroll, early 70s.
Me, aged about thirteen, in my mam’s kitchen at Avon Close in my black trenchcoat and beige patchpockets with three-button waistband.
Me and Our Paul as Perry Boys, late 70s. This was taken in Our Paul’s bedroom in our house at Kent Close.
Aged sixteen. I was working as a post boy by this stage.
My dad on holiday in Cornwall, early 80s, showing off our band name across the windscreen of his Renault.
The first ever Happy Mondays picture, before Bez joined the band. From left to right: me, Gaz Whelan, Our Paul, Mark Day and Paul Davis, outside All Saints Primary school in Swinton, where we used to practise.
Me and Bez on one of the Mondays’ first trips to London in 1985.
Caught unawares at the end of a long trip to London in the back of a transit my dad had hired from Salford Van Hire. From left to right: Paul Davis, Bez, our press guy Dave Harper, me, our manager, Phil Saxe, Mark Day and Our Paul.
The Mondays on the Staten Island ferry, on our eventful first trip to New York. This picture was taken the morning
after our gig, which is why we all look a bit knackered.
This was the photoshoot for Melody Maker in 1986. They actually used a shot of me and Bez with our hoods up on the cover.
Me and Tony Wilson pose in front of a Madchester poster outside the Factory offices, for the NME’s Madchester issue.
Me and Bez at the height of Madchester.
My dad, Horseman, and his trademark dance. This was taken on tour in Iceland in 1990.
Me and Bez on stage at Glastonbury at the height of the Mondays’ fame. I’ve never really liked being the centre of attention, which is one of the reasons I brought Bez into the band.
Me and Bez on stage at Glastonbury at the height of the Mondays’ fame. I’ve never really liked being the centre of attention, which is one of the reasons I brought Bez into the band.
Asked to pose with something ‘particularly significant’, I chose Kit Kats and explained, ‘They’ve kept me going through our long, arduous tours this year.’ It was the foil that kept me going.
Playing on through a thunderstorm at the Rock in Rio gig at the Maracanã stadium, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, 1991.
Me and Muzzer on the coach as we’re besieged by fans on arrival in Rio.
The Brazilian press reported that the Mondays were going to import a huge batch of ecstasy into Brazil. It was just something I’d told a Brazilian journalist as a joke.
Our Paul ties me in a straightjacket for an NME shoot. For the first time, we felt some of the press was turning against us.
Bez, me and Kermit, at the start of Black Grape.
This picture was taken when I was going cold turkey at Too Nice Tom’s house in Burnley.
I’m not arsed about mourning the Haçienda. I was there, I don’t need to relive it.
Me and Kermit on stage towards the end of Black Grape.
Me and Kermit on tour with his girlfriend Sarah and Danny Saber’s wife Helen.
Me doing my best to plug Admiral with the reformed Happy Mondays in 1999. Rowetta, Bez (front), Our Paul, me, Wags, Lee Mullen (front), Nuts, Gaz Whelan and Ben Leach.
Me and Russell Watson with matching haircuts in Barcelona in 2000, filming the video for our version of the Freddie Mercury and Montserrat Caballé song.
Me and Bez in 2005. Why on earth did Joanne let me leave the house with that fucking Mohican?!
Me and my wife Joanne on the red carpet at the National Television Awards in January 2011.
Me skydiving on I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here! I couldn’t breathe and thought I was going to pass out live on air like a right goon.
Me and my manager, Warren Askew, who has helped me become what we jokingly call ‘Showbiz Shaun’.
Me on This Morning with the incredibly handsome and cool Philip Schofield and Holly Willoughby.
Me and my moobs preparing to go into the jungle for I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here!
Being bitten by a snake in the jungle. People always ask to see the scar from the snakebite, but there isn’t one.
Showbiz Shaun and Stacey on stage at the National Television Awards.
Me eating kangaroo cock or something. Whatever I had to eat, it was a piece of piss compared to spending time with Gillian McKeith.
Me and Stacey as we came out of the jungle. I look spaced out, as if I’ve had an out-of-body experience.
Me and my Joanne signing the wedding register at the Court House in Worsley, March 2010.
Both of our families outside the Court House. They thought they were just coming for Lulu’s christening, then we sprang it on them that we were getting married.
My wife, Joanne, with Oliver who’s holding Pearl, Joseph, and Our Paul’s daughter, Amelia, holding Lulu.
Me and my old bloke Derek (Horseman) at my wedding.
Me and Joanne, back home after the jungle in January 2011.
Me and Tonn Piper, taking time out for a Guinness on tour, just before I went in to the jungle.
Tonn, backing singer Julie and me on the SWR tour at Shepherds Bush Empire, just after I came out of the jungle.
Picture Acknowledgements
All images courtesy of the author unless otherwise stated.
KC = Kevin Cummins; TS = Tom Sheehan; KA = Karin Albinsson.
SR and Bez, 1985, and Happy Mondays in Transit van all courtesy Stephen Parker.
Mondays on Staten Island courtesy TS
Melody Maker photoshoot and SR with Bez both courtesy TS.
SR and Tony Wilson, and Horseman in Iceland both courtesy KC.
SR with Kit Kats courtesy KC.
SR and Bez at Glastonbury: Brian Rasic/Rex Features.
Thunderstorm in Rio, SR and Muzzer, SR with newspaper, all courtesy KC.
Bez, SR and Kermit, SR with gun, SR with Hacienda RIP, all courtesy TS.
SR and Paul courtesy KC.
SR and Kermit courtesy KA.
SR with Kermit, Sarah and Helen courtesy KA.
Happy Mondays group shot courtesy TS.
SR and Russell Watson courtesy Denis Jones/Evening Standard/Rex Features.
SR and Bez courtesy KA.
SR with Joanne courtesy David Fisher/Rex Features.
All I’m A Celebrity and This Morning images courtesy ITV/Rex Features except SR and Stacey Solomon at National Television Awards courtesy Yui Mok/PA Archive/Press Association Images.
All wedding images courtesy KA.
SR and Joanne in January 2011 courtesy Manchester Evening News.
SR and Tom Piper courtesy KA.
SR on SWR Tour courtesy KA.
INDEX
The page references in this index correspond to the printed edition from which this ebook was created. To find a specific word or phrase from the index, please use the search feature of your ebook reader.
‘A Big Day in the North’ 266
A Certain Ratio (ACR) 72, 79
acid-house scene 137–8 see also E (ecstacy scene)
Adam and the Ants 163
Adventure Babies, The 236
Agony and the Ecstasy (documentary) 319–20
Albarn, Damon 327
Allen, Keith 188–9, 288
Allen, Lily 35
Amateur Night in the Big Top 316
Ambrose High School 21
Amsterdam 112
Anderton, James 109, 200–1
Ant and Dec 337, 339
Askew, Warren 334, 335, 336, 341
Astbury, Ian 197
Astrella (Donovan’s daughter) 184, 243, 247, 305
Attar, Bachir 255
Avalon, Mickey 329
Avengers, The 290–1
Bailey Brothers 92, 98, 130–1, 132, 138, 174, 175
Baker, Arthur 56
‘Baldricks’ 111
Barbados 225–38
Barker, Eric 62, 101, 105
Barrett, Jeff 76, 133, 141
Beastie Boys 143
Beatles, The 207
Berry, Andrew 72
Bez (Mark Berry) 35–6, 64–5, 66–7, 79, 84, 88–9, 94–5, 100, 102–3, 120, 152, 167, 171, 176, 185, 188, 194–5, 196, 225, 227, 231, 262, 279–80, 304–5, 319, 327, 333, 334, 341
Big Audio Dynamite 240
Biggie 291
Biggs, Ronnie 213
Bishop, Richard 290
Black, Clive 248–9
Black Grape 74, 97, 166, 190, 196, 330, 334–5, 342
album reviews 273
Brat Award 281
deal with Kurfirst 258–9, 260, 261
European dates 277
formation of 257–60
getting rid of Nicholls as managers 285–6
Grape Tapes video 294–5
Black Grape (cont.)
It’s Great When You’re Straight album 238, 262, 263, 264–7, 268–70, 272, 273
leaving of by Bez 279–80
line-up 262, 274
name 267
singles 272, 273, 274, 278, 284, 288
splitting up of 294, 295–6
Stupid Stupid Stupid album 200, 284, 293–5
> Top of the Pops appearances 273, 288
UK tours 274–5, 295
and United States 282, 283–4
videos 272
vision for 260–2, 278
Black Horse, The (Camden) 77
Boardwalk, The (Manchester) 71
‘Bob’s Your Uncle’ 202–3
Boon, Clint 110, 165
Booth, Tim 72, 208
Bowie, David 20, 40, 143